Faded Memories
by Chiera
Summary: After a very tragic event occurs, Kagome's is sealed, causing her to forget all about her travels in the past. She lives in her own time now, and everything's going just fine. Until she meets a familiar face. - Sesskag - Written in 2006 - Edited in 2009
1. Prologue: End of all things

Humor/Drama/Romance - Kagome & Sesshomaru - Originally Published: 01-01-06 – Originally Completed: 06-27-06 – 468 reviews before editing

**Rating: **M (because of the lemon content in chapter 7)

**Chie: **This is the first fanfic I ever wrote, it's also the one that has most reviews and favourites. I still get favourite alert emails from every now and then, so I decided to sit down to see what was so special about this fic. And what I saw made me gag.

This fic was started in 2006, that is 3 years ago. In those three years my skills in writing have improved quite a deal as has my skills in English language. Thus I decided to edit and rewrite this fic. I'm not touching the plot at all, merely making it all flow better, altering some word choices, correcting obvious mistakes and such. To do justice to a good story.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Inuyasha. I do not own LotR either ( I stole the title of this prologue from the Return of the King soundtrack, Song number 16. I love it.)

**Faded Memories**

**The Prologue: End of all things**

"Kagome!"

At the shout of her name, the woman turned her head to see the small fox demon running towards her. His tiny hands were tightly wrapped around Naraku's almost completed Shikon no Tama.

She couldn't help him in any way, all she could do was to watch him fall.

"Shippou!" she cried out in distress when she saw one of their vicious enemy's tentacles beat the little fox kit down.

Nearly completed Shikon no Tama rolled over from his over palm all the way to her and stopped right at her feet.

Unshed tears in her eyes she watched the silent form of Shippou, lying in the cold hard ground. She waited him to get up again but he didn't. The kitsune would never again rise from where he now lay.

"Kagome! Take the Shikon no Tama and run!" Inuyasha shouted. The silver-haired hanyou evaded one of Naraku's attacks, blocking another one with Tessaiga.

Kagome felt throbbing pain in her heart, but she did as she had been told to do.

She bent down, grabbed Shikon no Tama and ran.

Behind her back Inuyasha was thrown aside. She turned to look back over her shoulder and saw how Inuyasha got back up to his feet.

Naraku was staggering. One final slash. They both fell down.

"Inuyasha!"

His voice was hoarse as he yelled back in response.

"RUN!"

And so she did. Tears blurred her vision and she ran, ran all the way back to Kaede's hut.

The old miko calmly took in her disheveled appearance.

"Is it over now?"

Kagome could only nod before her knees gave in under her.

She had something clenched inside her fist... She opened her hand. Shikon no Tama rested on her palm.

"You got it!" Kaede celebrated, patting the younger miko's shoulder.

Moving almost involuntarily, like in a dream, Kagome took the shards she carried around her neck and added them to the jewel.

It was done. The Shikon no Tama was completed.

Suddenly she gave a loud gasp as a sharp pain hit her.

Kaede gave her a quick glance and then left the hut in a hurry.

"Go to look what has happened," Kaede ordered one of the mikos who were now circling her. "Rest of you, come with me."

"They're all dead," the miko informed as soon as she returned.

Kaede sighed.

"Is Naraku dead as well?"

"That is most probable, but we did not find his body."

Kagome was lying on the floor, curled up in a lonely corner. There was a blank expression on her face and her tear-filled eyes were staring aheas without really seeing anything.

_All dead_, the words echoed in her mind. _All dead save for me..._

"Kagome," the old miko called out softly.

The young time-traveler did not respond in any way as her name was called.

"Kaede-sama, what happened to the Shikon no Tama?" one of the gathered mikos asked.

"It returned to whence it once came," Kaede said slowly, and turned to give Kagome a long glance. "It was absorbed into her body."

"Is she... Is she going to be all right?"

Worried glances were exchanged all over the small room.

"I... I don't really know. It is quite a shock for her. All of her friends are dead… She in very vulnerable and very broken right now."

"There is a way to heal her."

"You would not mean…!" Kaede's eyes widened.

"But Kaede-sama, we have no options. Or do you wish to see her like this? Her heart broken, her mind collapsed and her soul shattered? Her current state could have bad effects on Shikon no Tama. Her brokenness could taint the jewel! She could turn... To something else."

"Kaede-sama. It is most unfortunate, but it is the only choice."

Kaede watched the girl for awhile, in silence.

"Very well."

Inuyasha panted and breathed heavily. Tessaiga had transformed back to an old rusty katana. He had done it, Naraku was lying dead in front of him. A victorious grin spread over his face, but it quickly turned into a grimace as he felt the throbbing pain. He should go and get his wounds tended. Looking around now, sadness filled him as he saw everyone little further away.

Shippou's cooled body. Sango and Miroku lying close to each other. He could see the marks on the ground and knew that Sango had dragged herself over the monk with her last strength.

He saw a sudden movement in the corner of his eyes and turned to face the dead priestess.

"Kikyo."

"I have come to bid you farewell, Inuyasha", Kikyo said quietly.

"What?"

"Shikon no Tama is completed. There is no reason for me to roam in the world of living anymore."

"But... Kikyo... Why don't you stay?"

"I'm tired, Inuyasha. I wish to finally rest in peace as I should have. And I have been revenged as well, since you killed Naraku for me."

"Kikyo..."

"Goodbye, Inuyasha."

"Wait!"

The woman turned to look over her shoulder.

"Are you not taking me to hell with you?"

Kikyo smiled, but it was an empty smile.

"I'll go alone for I know that you have another woman in your heart now."

She walked away.

Inuyasha stood there, rooted to his spot as he watched her leave.

It hurt him, it really hurt him deep to watch her go.

But he knew that he had Kagome...

Where was Kagome?

He started to run to the direction Kagome had run.

He reached Kaede's hut which seemed peaceful and quiet.

"Kaede-baba!"

Kaede hurried out of her hut to meet him and paled at the sight of him.

"Inuyasha? You're... alive?"

"Feh! Like some dirty hanyou like Naraku could have beaten me up." he paused to flash a stupid grin. "Now, where's Kagome?"

Kaede was still staring at him.

"Where is she?" Inuyasha repeated, impatience clearly present in his voice.

"She... We... We thought not one of you had survived and did what we saw to be the best thing to do," she said quietly, avoiding his inquiring stare.

Inuyasha's grin faded.

"What did you do to her?"

"We sealed away her memory and sent her back through that well."

Inuyasha did not say a word. He turned on his heels and started to run towards the well.

"Inuyasha! Your wounds!" the old miko shouted after him.

He blocked her voice out of his ears, all he could think about now was Kagome...

He reached the well and jumped in.

The hanyou's bare feet soon hit the sand-covered bottom. He stood there, frozen, not wanting to believe what was happening. The well was not letting him through. He tried several times, but it was all in vain. The well had closed.

Kaede reached him at the well.

"The well is closed. Shikon no Tama returned into Kagome's body. That must be why."

Inuyasha looked up to her from the bottom of the well. He jumped out and drew his sword.

"This cannot be! I want Kagome!"

"And what about Kikyo-nee?"

"The hell with Kikyo! I want Kagome!"

The feeling of loss was overwhelming. He had lost his friends, he had lost Kikyo, he had lost Shikon no Tama... He had lost his Kagome. He turned around and ran.

Few days later, some of the villagers returned from the forest carrying someone.

"Kaede-sama! Kaede-sama!"

The old miko stepped out of her hut to meet them.

"What is it?" she inquired

"It's Inuyasha, miko-sama. We found him dead."

"What did you say," Kaede hissed, not believing her ears.

"We found him in the forest, Kaede-sama. It seems that he has committed Seppuku."

**

* * *

Chie:** For those who do not know, "seppuku" is a word Japanese themselves use for what we Westerners refer to as a "hara-kiri" i.e. ritual suicide.

You might hate me now, I know it's not fun killing off everyone and it's not like I had personally enjoyed it... But it's very, very essential for the plot.

... I hope you will understand. Please keep reading.


	2. A life so changed

**Disclaimer:** No, they're not mine. At all. -sigh- Not even the title. I stole it from yet another song. From Titanic soundtrack this time, track number 12. (I like the idea of borrowing titles from songs)

**Chapter one – A life so changed**

"Kagome!" a female voice managed to break through the buzz of the crowd and reach the ears of the young dark-haired woman.

She stopped on her tracks and turned to see her friend Eri waving her hand in the air.

She walked over to her and they hugged each other warmly.

"It's been a while! How have you been, Kagome-chan?"

"I've been just fine. What about you?"

"Oh, everything's great. How's the restaurant?"

"Blooming," Kagome replied with a smile.

"It's funny though," Eri said, answering Kagome's smile with her own. "Somehow I always pictured you as a nurse or something, you know, taking care of people. But then you decided not go to college and entered the work-life straight away!"

"I wouldn't have made it to college," Kagome pointed out. "As you know, my high school grades weren't that good… Maths was particularly horrible." Kagome shook her head at the memory.

"Hey, you know, the girls and I were about to see each other this Saturday. There's an art exhibition opening that Yuka has been helping to organise. It's not a professional painters exhibition, but Yuka told us that he's really good nonetheless. We planned to go there together and I was about to call you anyway to ask you to join us, so… please, do come."

"Sure. I have no other plans anyway. I'd love to see you guys again!"

"Great! I'll call you – Waah! Look at the time, I must hurry! See you, Kagome-chan!" She hugged her friend tightly again and then was already hurrying away, disappearing among the many pedestrians before Kagome had even time to say goodbye.

She smiled to herself and started walking again, into her own direction.

* * *

Higurashi Kagome was twenty years old and living on her own. She saw her family once a week for when they came over to eat dinner at the restaurant she worked at. That had become a Monday-tradition for the Higurashi family. Shaere-san, who was the sister of Kagome's mother, had finally got up a business of her own and had founded a little cozy restaurant and had hired Kagome to help her.

Kagome walked down the crowded streets, trying her best to ignore her throbbing headache.

_Must be the dream_, she thought to herself. Indeed, she had seen the weirdest dream last night. She had dreamt of a boy who had white hair and dog-ears, and who had been pierced by an arrow and pinned by it to a tree. She snorted. Dreams were so weird sometimes! Like such dog-eared boys could exist. An odd feeling tugged her soul. The tree had looked rather familiar though. It had been just like the ancient sacred tree near her childhood home.

"Good morning," Kagome greeted Shaere-san, her aunt and boss, as she stepped into the little restaurant. The owner was sitting behind a wooden counter, glancing over some papers.

"Ahh, Kagome-chan. You'll be in the serving shift today."

"All right!"

"We'll open in half an hour. Please clean the tables." She grabbed the papers and got up. "I'll be in the kitchen."

"Alright!" She hurried to the room in the back and left there her purse and then changed into her waitress' uniform.

And then she was on it. First cleaning up the tables as she was ordered to, then after the restaurant had been opened, welcoming the customers with a smile on her face, hurrying from one table to another taking orders and delivering the meals and drinks. It was a tiring job, for there were no other waitresses besides her. Well, there was Kayade, but she was today helping Shaere-san in the kitchen. And when Kayade was working as a waitress, then it was Kagome's turn helping out in the kitchen. Shaere-san did not want to hire much people in her staff, and she was very strict about who were accepted. There were just the three of them: Shaere-san, Kayade and Kagome. Well, the restaurant _was_ rather small, so it was all right, but for a small restaurant it was quite a popular one. Actually, it was a bit more like coffee-house than a restaurant for most of the time for the meals were ordered mostly at the lunch time or on evenings.

On mornings there were few people who occasionally dropped by to sip a cup of coffee before going to work, during lunchtime there were people who worked in the company few blocks away. On afternoons the restaurant was full of students from a high school nearby. On evenings there were mostly adults and some families with their children. But all in all, she really liked the restaurant and working there. It was a nice job and it paid quite well too. She worked there for nine hours every day, from ten to seven. On Saturday she was working less, from eleven to four.

* * *

There came the quiet hour, when students were gone and the evenings' usual customers had not yet arrived. Kagome was sitting behind the counter on which was the casher. Her head fell to rest on her arms that were folded on top of the counter and she closed her eyes, oh, for just one single minute...

_There was a sword in some kind of a stone. Neither of them had been able to pull that out. Kagome stumbled forward and put her hand on the hilt of the sword, in order to support herself. Two figures were ahead of her, fighting with each other. Both of them had long silvery hair, but otherwise they were all different__ from each other._

_She turned a__round to shout out a name she did not recognize herself, and her hand moved along her body. The sword was pulled out by her movement and she nearly fell onto the ground again, having lost her support. _

_Both of them stopped fighting and looked at her in awe. She stared at the sword in her hand._

"_Impossible!" the little green something gasped._

_And then the other one of the fighters was there, right in front of her. _

_She shuddered when she looked into his golden eyes. They were gazing upon her coldly._

"_What are you? How were you able to pull out this Tetsusaiga?"_

A hand was placed on her arm and it was shaking her. She awoke instantly and raised her head. Several moments passed by and she could only stare.

There was a frown on his beautiful face and for few seconds she saw something akin to recognition flashing in his golden eyes.

It was the guy from her dream. Alive and breathing and oh so real, standing right before her, staring at her. She swallowed and then seemed to get her voice back.

"Good afternoon and welcome. May I take you order, sir?"

"Just one cup of coffee." his voice was cold and distant, almost rude, and his face was now blank, wrapped up in an emotionless mask.

"All right. Please choose any table you want." Kagome rushed off to get the coffeepot and then walked up to the man who had settled himself to a table by the window.

She poured until he told her to stop.

"Milk? Sugar?"

"Not necessary."

"Please enjoy your coffee!" Kagome wished with a cheery bow and then went back to sit behind the counter to watch through the windows how people walked by the restaurant. She straightened her short black skirt.

He followed her with his eyes.

It could not be.

And still, it _had_ to be, his senses could not err. He frowned. How come this human miko was still alive? That she had survived the battle against Naraku was remarkable, but how could she possibly have lived through all these centuries? She was a mortal, a human. She had aged a bit, she had clearly matured, but she was still young and there was no doubt that she wouldn't be the miko who once had followed around that whelp of his half brother. He frowned again. Something was amiss, however. He could sense something strange about her, some kind of a presence that clung to her, but he could not point out what it was exactly. But of course, it was not like he _cared_.

He did not, of course. He did not care. She was the miko from centuries ago, so what? He snorted arrogantly. Whatever reason it was why she still was alive and breathing, it had to do with him. He drank his coffee, paid for it and left the restaurant for good.

Kagome watched him go and shook her head when he was gone. He was exactly like he had been in her dream. He had beautiful white – no, silvery – hair, amber eyes, indigo crescent moon on his brow, magenta stripes on his cheeks... It truly had been him, alive and real! Did this mean that the red-clad, dog-eared boy was real too? Kagome was frowned. Just _why_ had she been dreaming about so weird stuff lately? She was probably losing her mind. Yes, that was the only sensible conclusion that she was able to draw. She rose to her feet and walked over to the table where the man with the amber eyes had been sitting at, picked up the empty coffee-cup and took it to the kitchen for being washed. She wiped the table clean and then was off again, to take an order from a couple that had just walked in.

"Shaere-san," she said while pulling a shirt over her head, "I'm sorry, but I'd like to leave an hour earlier this Saturday, if poossible. A few friends of mine who I haven't seen for quite a while – "

"It's alright," her boss assured, smiling. "Kayade-chan and I will able to take care of that one hour just by the two of us."

"Yeah, don't worry about it, Kagome-chan," Kayade joined in, smiling as well.

"Thank you, Shaere-san, Kayade-chan." Kagome bowed her head. "Well, I'm off now." She adjusted her purse so that it would not slide down her arm. "Good bye!"

"See you tomorrow."

"Bye!"

* * *

"Hello, Shue!" she greeted the purring toffee-coloured cat as she picked him up. She walked over to the sofa and sat down. Shue curled up in her lap and she buried her face into his fluffy fur.

"Oh, what a day..."

She felt tired and looked around in her own apartment.

It was rather little an apartment, only two rooms, a kitchen and a bathroom, but there was well enough room for her, after all her only company was the purring, fluffy cat.

White was the main colour in the decoration. The two little soft sofas in the living room were white, too, and square rosy pink pillows rested on them. There was little TV on a wooden desk. Next to it was a bookshelf where she had all her precious books, Kagome just loved reading. Four white wooden chairs were circling the little round dinner-table, on which her laptop currently rested. Her mother had bought it for her on her last birthday. The kitchen was more the size of a cupboard than that of an actual room; two people would not have had enough room to cook in there. But it was just Kagome there and she managed to cook in the small kitchen just fine, so it was okay.

Her bedroom was rather small too; the only furniture in there were her bed, a bedside table, a cupboards where she kept her clothes and a small chair next to the cupboard. All in all, she really liked her own small apartment. It was nice and cozy, and the best thing about it was that it was all hers. One could clearly see _her _in every furniture, item and textile. And that was why she loved her apartment so much.

Little cleaning up wouldn't have hurt, but she right now she was simply too tired to even think about it. She hadn't really slept peacefully lately, and when she was awake, there was an odd restlessness that kept tugging her soul. And she had been in a serving-shift for three days in a row now. Three days of smiling, cleaning, serving the customers and running around…

Absent-mindedly she scratched the cat behind his ears. Maybe she should go straight to bed..?

No. She wasn't _that_ tired. She got up and Shue the cat jumped safely down and walked out of her sight. Kagome walked to the kitchen and soon she was sitting on the sofa again, a book waiting in her lap, holding a warm mug in her hands. Steam was lazily whirling near the surface of the liquid and she raised the mug to her lips and carefully sipped the hot tea. It tasted heavenly. She sighed happily and closed her eyes and took another careful sip. She put the cup on the small table that was in front of the sofa and then opened her book. She had not got even halfway down the page when her phone rang. With an annoyed sigh she rose and walked over to answer it.

"Higurashi."

"Hello, my darling!"

"Ah, Hojo," her annoyance melted. "How are the exams?"

"Pretty tough, but I'll manage. Tomorrow's the last one, and after that I'd want to treat my beautiful girlfriend a dinner. I miss you, darling."

"I miss you too," Kagome said softly.

"So, I'll come to pick you up tomorrow evening. Is eight o'clock okay?"

"Umm.. Sure. But.. Where are we going exactly?"

"It's a surprise. I'll see you then."

"Okay."

"Love you."

"Love you too."

Kagome hung up. She gave a happy sigh and sipped her tea. It had now cooled enough to be drinkable and Kagome emptied the cup.

She hummed to herself for awhile. It had been some time since she had last seen Hojo. The young man had been terribly busy with his studies and his part-time job. Well, Hojo was always busy... But usually he still managed to make time for his girlfriend. They had started dating in high school, a little after she had recovered from the various illnesses of which she had suffered back then. It was quite weird, actually. She had been wondering about it so many times. The illnesses had stopped so suddenly and afterwards she had been very healthy, as if she never had been sick her whole life.

A wide yawn broke the line of her thought.

She glanced at the clock. It was half past nine. Where had the time gone?

Because she still felt exhausted, she got up and carried the empty tea-mug to kitchen sink and then walked into her bedroom, changed into her pajamas and curled up under the blankets. Soon the cat landed onto her bed with a quiet thump. He curled up against her back and purred himself into sleep. Kagome sighed contently and let the sleep claim her.

_He had dark eyes and pitch black hair. He was wounded, and he lay still, next to her. Somehow, she could not exactly explain why, she knew it was the same dog-e__ared boy of whom she had been dreaming before. But this time, something was different about him. _

"_Let me... use your lap," he said slowly._

_She nodded in approval and gently pulled his head to rest in her lap._

"_Do you feel a little better," she asked softly._

_He had his eyes closed._

"_You.. smell nice.."_

_She blushed._

_Just why was her heart __pounding that fast...?_

Kagome woke up. She stared at the white ceiling and let out a silent little groan. Not again those silly dreams..! She raised her hand to rub her temples. Maybe she should drag herself to a shrink or something...

Well, now wasn't the right time to wonder about that, anyway. She got up and dressed. Holding a tea-cup in one hand, she stood in front of the mirror, grimacing to her reflection as she brushed her long blue-black hair. She ate some breakfast and fed the cat. And then she bid her cat goodbye and was off to work.

* * *

"So, anything special planned for today?" Kayade asked as she was pulling on her uniform.

"I'm going to see Hojo tonight. He'll take me out for a dinner."

"Oh, how nice! When did you last go out on date?"

"I suppose it was two weeks ago. He's been busy with his part-time job and he lately had exams too..."

"Oh, pity," Kayade patted Kagome's arm in sympathy.

"Yeah, but there's really not much I can do about it," Kagome said quietly and tied the apron-string on a knot. She would be on the kitchen duty today.

Kayade nodded in understanding.

"Come on, girls, we don't have the whole day," came Shaere-san's yell from the kitchen.

Kagome and Kayade exchanged grins and then prepared themselves for yet another day at work.

* * *

He didn't know what was wrong with him. Surely he did not even want see that place again, but something kept bothering him. A nagging feeling that something was not quite right, and that it had something to do with _her_. So that was probably the reason why he found himself heading to that pitiful little restaurant again. He did not care, that was true, but it bothered him nonetheless. Why was that wench still alive? Maybe she could answer a few questions...

He did not know what had happened. He had only been informed of spreading rumors according to which his half-brother had killed the hanyou Naraku, and shortly after that, committed a Seppuku himself.

He had always been a fool. Filthy, worthless half-breed. And yet he had been left with Tetsusaiga instead of Sesshoumaru, the righteous heir and ruler of the Western lands... It was an outrage.

And there he was. He shook his head. Just what the hell he was doing here, anyway?

The waitress stared in awe at the tall, white-haired man who stepped in, his face wrapped up in a mask that lacked all emotion. Though the golden colour of his eyes was warm, the stare he gave her was as cold as ice. His skin was pale and he was well build.

He was so _hot_!

"Welcome, sir, may I take your order?" she asked smiling, maybe a slight hint of flirt in her voice.

He stared coldly at the blond-haired waitress.

It wasn't the miko.

So he had walked all the way down here for nothing? He glanced around the little restaurant, seeing nothing that pleased his high standards. Without a word, he turned on his heels and walked out of the whole place.

The waitress blinked.

Just _what_ had that now been? She shook her head.

The guy was awfully rude, it seemed. But yet, he was such a hottie. Kayade shrugged and went to clean the tables.

* * *

Kagome was nervously watching her reflection. She straightened her skirt. Was this outfit proper? What about the shoes? Oh, _why_ her hair had to be so messy? If only she knew to where Hojo would be taking her... Shue was purring and rubbing his head against her feet.

"Not now, Shue, dear," Kagome hissed when she bent closer to the mirror, trying desperately to do something to save her hair.

The doorbell rang.

"Shit," Kagome muttered under her breath.

"Just a second," she shouted out loud.

Desperately she just grabbed a hairbrush and quickly brushed her hair. She would have to leave it as it was.

She hurried to the door and grabbed her jacket from the rack and then reached to open the door.

"Hello sweetheart," her boyfriend greeted her, bending down to place a soft kiss on her lips. "You look charming."

"Thank you, dear," she said softly and her lips melted to a tender smile.

"Shall we get going then," he asked, offering her his arm.

"Yes, we shall," Kagome replied, stepping out to the corridor and pulling the door shut. She carefully placed her hand on his arm.

Hojo smiled and led her to his car.

* * *

"Oh my gosh, this place is so _great,_" she winced, eyeing the fancy restaurant. She was sitting at a peaceful lonely corner table with Hojo. Her hand was resting on the table and Hojo set his hand gently on top of hers.

"Just order anything you want, dear."

"Are you sure you can afford this all?" Kagome asked, frowning a little in her worry.

"Don't worry about it, dear," Hojo assured her with a smile.

The frown disappeared.

"As you wish, my darling."

They made their orders and waited for the food to be served.

Kagome was casually holding the long glass, sipping her wine every now and then, as she listened to Hojo when he told her about everything that had happened since they had last seen each other.

"You got promoted? Darling, that's _wonderful_!"

"That's not all," Hojo said. "I've started to put some of my salary money aside...To buy us an apartment."

"Oh, you..." Kagome felt tears welling in her eyes. She swiftly wiped them away.

"There's still some more..." Hojo said quietly. He reached over the table and grabbed Kagome's hands into his own.

"Kagome... I've loved you ever since the first time I saw you. You have my heart in your hands."

Hojo looked at her closely. Kagome started blushing. She tried to look away from his chocolate eyes but couldn't.

"I've been living in a dream ever since you started dating me, and I've enjoyed every single moment. And lately, I've been thinking about extending my dream to a whole different level."

Kagome's eyes widened. He couldn't mean… Did he? Was he really talking about what she thought he was...?

"Kagome, my love, will you marry me?"


	3. She will be loved

**Disclaimer**: I still do not own Inuyasha... And I borrowed (read: stole) again the title from the title of the song "She will be loved" by Maroon 5... I own that song as much as I do own Inuyasha. (i.e. none of it)

**Chapter two - She will be loved**

Kagome's eyes widened in surprise. Her gaze flew from the plain golden ring to Hojo's chocolate brown eyes which were staring at her, holding in an unanswered question - maybe even a slight hint of a plea.

It struck like a bolt of lightning from clear summer sky. They were 20 years old and Hojo had loved her ever since junior high, but still… Still she had not really been expecting this.

She didn't notice how many of the couples in the tables nearby were glancing at them, whispering something along the lines of "Ohh, look at that!", "How sweet!" or "So romantic! Look how cute they are together!"

Her mind went blank. What was she going to say? Hojo was sweet and caring and good-looking too... He had a good part-time job - and he just had been promoted too - and he was studying to become a doctor and it was partly because of her that he had chosen that career. He had got the spark when Kagome had in high school had her mysterious period of illnesses. It was around that time when the medical science had started to fascinate him. Hojo bought her sweet gifts every once in a while. He never forgot the important dates. He always had time for her. He was never late from an important meeting or a date with her... Indeed, he was an ideal boyfriend to have. But still, Kagome hesitated. Would Hojo make an ideal husband as well? Did she truly love him? She cared about him, a lot, but did she want to live with him under the same roof? Did she want to have children with him? Did she want to wake up in the morning with him by her side? Did she want to grow old with him? Was she willing to share her whole life with him?

Question after question whirled around in her mind that was rapidly falling to chaos and confusion.

Then she took a deep breath to calm herself. Maybe this warm feeling for him was love..? How could she know? She had never loved anyone before... right?

An image flashed in her mind.

The black-haired boy lying down, his purple eyes closed. Resting his head in her lap. Telling her that she smelled nice...

She mentally shook her head. That was a dream, right? A dream! Not reality.

Hojo was still staring at her. The hint of plea in his eyes had grown bigger.

How could she resist those adorable, pleading chocolate eyes?

She couldn't.

"Yes."

It was nothing more than a hoarse whisper, but its influence on him was remarkable. His face immediately lit up. A proud, happy wide smile appeared. His eyes glimmered, filled with adoration and love.

Hojo gently pulled her hand to him and slipped the golden piece of jewelry onto her ring-finger.

"I love you," he repeated, meaning every word of it.

"I love you too", Kagome answered. Though deep in the back of her mind, something kept tugging her heart. It was telling her that she really did not mean that. That she really was not as sincere as Hojo had been.

She determinedly silenced that little annoying feeling.

What had love to do with it anyway, she told to the little feeling of wrongness. She was going to have a sweet, perfect husband and a secure marriage...

But of course, she did love Hojo. Why wouldn't she love him? What was this ever warming feeling in her chest, if not love?

* * *

"Ohmygosh! Honestly? Let me see!"

Kagome raised her left hand to the level of her eyes.

"Aaaaaaawww!"

Kagome nearly fell on her back when Kayade suddenly pounced and hugged her.

"This is so great! I'm so happy for you! Awesome!"

"What's this commotion about?" Shaere asked, standing in the doorway of the staffroom. "You girls should already have changed..."

"Look, Shaere-san!" Kayade chirped, grabbing Kagome's left hand from the wrist and dragged the whole girl with her as she hurried over to Shaere-san to shove the hand right under her boss' nose.

"Notice any changes?"

Shaere-san frowned.

And then she did notice.

"Oh my dear!" she blurted out and gave Kagome one of her rare hugs.

"Have you told my sister yet?"

"No, Hojo and I will go visit mum and grandfather on Sunday and tell them then."

"Congratulations," Shaere-san said warmly, before walking out of the room.

Kagome turned back to Kayade.

"I was so surprised! I seriously had no idea..."

"I'm jealous of you," Kayade admitted. "Hojo is such a nice guy. You truly deserve a nice guy! Oh, that reminds me.. You know what? The weirdest guy came here yesterday... I honestly swear he had white hair and amber eyes! My gosh, he was rude! Just stared at me coldly and then walked away, without saying a word! He seriously gave me shivers. But... He had to be the hottest guy I've ever seen. Aww, anyway, I wish I had a boyfriend.."

Kagome smiled. It was so much like Kayade, to talk like that, just blurting out pretty much everything that came to her mind...

A frown appeared on her forehead. That guy she had mentioned sounded familiar though.

"I think... I think I know that guy."

"You do?"

"I mean, I think I've seen him before... Did he have weird marks on his face? Like a crescent moon over here," Kagome said, tapping her brow.

"No, he was normal, save for the weird hair colour and eye colour... Bet he's dyeing his hair and wearing contacts!"

Kagome didn't reply.

Shaere-san came in again.

"Girls, please, today..."

They got up and went to work.

* * *

"No! Honestly?"

"Yes, just imagine how surprised I was..."

"I bet... But that's just great! I'm happy for you!"

"Oh.. Yuka.. Please don't tell the others yet.. I'll tell them tomorrow when we meet."

"Sure! But hey, I'm truly sorry but I got to go now."

"It's okay, I have to go too."

"Bye!"

"Bye, see you tomorrow!"

She hung up.

"I'm sorry for the disturbance, Hisakata-san."

He nodded coldly.

"It was my friend. She got proposed yesterday." the woman flashed him a smile.

Why would he want to know that? He did not care. The only reason why he was dealing with these humans was because he had no other choice. Humans were everywhere. Youkai were gone. Well, not completely. Some were still left, hiding, pretending to be humans…

How pitiful and disgusting.

_You are doing that too_, he reminded himself.

_I know. I have no other choice_, he growled back.

But knowing that he had no choice did not stop him from despising it.

"I am so happy for Kagome-chan!" the young woman said more to herself.

Kagome? He had heard that name somewhere…

He shook his head. So what? He did not care.

"Could we please continue already?"

"Sure! I am sorry, Hisakata-san."

He grunted in a low tone.

* * *

"Mom? Hi!"

"Hi Kagome. How are you doing?"

"I'm all fine. Listen mom, would it be okay if I come over for a visit this Sunday? With Hojo?"

"Sure you can, dear. When are you coming?"

"I suppose in the afternoon. Probably around two o'clock."

"All right, I'll see you then, my dear. Tell my sister I said hi."

"Okay! Bye mom!"

Kagome hung up and set the phone on the table.

Shue brushed himself against her feet, yearning for attention.

Kagome reached down to pet him.

"You know, I still can't believe it..." she said quietly to her cat.

He answered her with a purr.

"You need some food, hun." She picked him up and walked into the kitchen. After awhile of digging through the fridge, she found the cat food can she had been looking for. She filled up Shue's bowl and the cat started to eat straight away.

Kagome returned to the living room and settled down to her favourite spot on the sofa, pulling her laptop from the table into her lap. She still had someone to whom to tell about the latest news...

_Heya._

_How are you doing? Is your hand still hurting?_

_I have to tell you, I've had the weirdest dreams lately... I'm sure I've never seen such dreams before and yet they seem familiar… I personally think I'm going crazy, and haven't told any of my other friends about the dreams. I know I can tell you anything, I trust you, and I know you won't laugh at me or ask me if I am feeling well... -rolls her eyes-_

_Anyway. In my dreams there's always this one red-clad guy, who has quite long white hair and amber eyes - AND DOG EARS!_

_... I know, it makes no sense... A creature straight from some weird anime or something. But still. I also dreamed about a tall guy, who also had white hair and golden eyes, his hair was longer though... Maybe those guys are related in some way..? _

_Anyway, they were fighting with one another and when I woke up - now we get to the freaky part - he was still there! First I thought I was either still dreaming or then hallucinating.._

_But no! He really was there, alive and breathing.. He even had the weird markings on his face, Red stripes and purplish crescent.. He just.. seemed so inhuman. Which is silly. What else could he have been?_

_And Kayade told me today that he had come back to the restaurant, she said he bore no marks on his face though. And I am sure they were there! But I think that it still has to be the same guy.._

_Anyway, that was not the subject I indented to tell you about. _

_Uhm.. Well, I shall just blurt it out. Hojo proposed me yesterday! I was so surprised, you wouldn't believe it. He took me to this really fancy restaurant and then told me he loves me and asked me to marry him.. I'm so excited! I still fear that it all was just a dream and I'll wake up any minute..._

_But, I got to go now. Take care, my friend! _

_Hugs!_

_-Kagome_

"E-mail sent", flashed on the screen. Kagome logged out and switched off her computer. They had been e-mailing each other for some years now. She lived in Hokkaido, in Sapporo. They had met once, when Kagome's class had made a class-trip to Hokkaido. She and Eri and Ayumi had got lost from the other group. They had ran into the red-head girl, who had kindly guided them to the museum they were supposed to go. They had then changed their e-mail addresses, and had been keeping contact ever since.

She stretched and yawned.

_They were on a little clearing. The kitsune-cub was sitting in her lap and the red-clad, silver-haired boy was lying on his back next to her. Little further away were sitting two humans. They were discussing about something in low voices. She sighed happily. The flames of the fire danced happily. They had been walking for the whole day again and she was exhausted. Her feet hurt… _

_Everything was peaceful, s__he felt like home. She turned to look at the dog-eared boy. He had closed his eyes so he did not see the gentle smile that was on her face. The kitsune-cub had fallen asleep and she gently brushed his tail into a better position. Kirara the cat came to her. She brushed her head against her knee..._

Wait, what?

The world settled around her. Shue was still rubbing his head against her knee. Kagome blinked.

Now what exactly had that been? Why these weird dreams kept coming? She never usually remembered her dreams after waking up. But ever since she had first dreamed of the dog-boy, she had remembered every second...Why now?

Why her?

She sighed and forced herself to get up. She felt all stiff after falling asleep on her sofa. A cup of chamomile tea and then she'd go to sleep, tomorrow was an important day...

* * *

"I'm leaving now," she shouted to Shaere-san, who was busy in the kitchen.

"Sure! Off you go, dear. Have fun!"

"Thanks, I will. Bye!"

Kagome hurried out of the restaurant. She straightened her skirt with a quick tug as she shuffled among all the people walking on the crowded street. She made it just in time to the subway. Mechanic doors closed behind her and she wrapped her hand casually around the metal pole. In 8 minutes they reached her stop and she got off. After a little walk she was in front of the gallery-building. Eri and Ayumi were standing next to the double doors, waiting for her.

"Kagome!"

The girls exchanged lots of greetings and hugs.

"Ehh.. should we go in now..?" Ayumi said, interrupting the cheery chitchatting of the other two girls.

"Sure," Eri said, grabbing Kagome's hand and pulling her friend inside the building after her.

They paid for the admission to the counter and then proceeded into the actual gallery-room. Yuka saw them immediately.

"Will you excuse me, Hisakata-san? My friends just arrived…"

"Do as you wish," the man replied with a bored tone. Why had he let his secretary to talk him into this nonsense? And why had she hired that kind of a woman to organise the art exhibition? He deeply disliked her. Idly his gaze followed Yuka as she walked over to greet her friends.

His inner demon raised its head. It knew this scent…

"Let me see the ring," Yuka chirped after she had greeted Kagome, Eri and Ayumi.

"What ring?" Eri asked suspiciously.

Kagome extended her left hand for her friends to see.

The sight caused her friends to gasp and stare at the ring, then getting over the surprise they hugged and congratulated her. Sesshoumaru watched the scene from the other side of the room. He snorted. Foolish lowly humans. Was it really that necessary to them to make such a racket? It was highly disturbing to his delicate ears. That much squealing and gasping and getting that excited only for one plain ring?

How foolish.

Kagome beamed. She had been a little worried about Eri's reaction.

"I have to go back to Hisakata-san now," Yuka said, flashing an apologetic smile.

Kagome glanced at the tall man.

It couldn't be...

He had pale skin and high cheekbones. His silvery hair fell gracefully down his back and his cold golden eyes were staring at Yuka with a hint of disgust. Only emotions that could be read from his face were boredom and arrogance. And then she spotted the indigo crescent moon that was on his brow. It had to be him.

"Have you ever wondered what that crescent moon on his forehead means," she heard herself asking, still watching Sesshoumaru's quiet form.

"What crescent moon?" Yuka wondered out loud.

"He has a purple crescent moon... On his brow.. Right?"

"You must have seen some reflection of light or something," Yuka blinked in confusion. "He has no crescent moon on his face."

_What is it with this?_ Kagome pondered in her mind. Why was she the only one who was able to see the odd markings on his face..?

She shivered. He was watching back at her.

Somehow she found the situation familiar...

"Let's go to watch the paintings!" Eri chirped grabbing Kagome's arm and dragging her on.

Ayumi giggled and followed.

Yuka had been telling the truth, he truly was talented. The paintings were really beautiful. Kagome stared in awe.

No matter how rude that guy was... He sure could paint! She respected him on a whole different level now. Most of the paintings were old-fashioned landscapes. There were forests, mountains, rivers and villages. One feudal age castle was in several paintings.

What it would have been like to live on that era, Kagome thought as she examined the paintings with her intense stare. There was one painting that had especially caught her eye. It was of a dark-haired girl who seemed to be about 8 years old. She was wearing a checked kimono, a bright wide smile on her face and there was a bouquet of wildflowers in her outstretched arms. She was standing on a field of flowers and several butterflies were surrounding her form. It was the cutest thing she had ever seen, and it seemed so weird that such a cold and arrogant guy could have created something that adorable.

"You like it, miss?"

Kagome startled. Beside her was standing a young woman, who seemed to be about the same age as Kagome herself. She had raven hair and sweet smile on her face.

"Yes, I like it very much," Kagome replied after she had got over her surprise.

"Allow me to introduce myself, I am Miyame, the secretary of Sesshoumaru-sama - I mean, Hisakata-sama."

"I am Higurashi Kagome," Kagome replied with a tiny bow.

"He is so talented, isn't he?" she gave an admiring sigh.

"Yes, truly. Far better than I had expected."

"He probably hates me now, though," the secretary giggled.

"Why so?" Kagome wondered out loud.

"It was my idea to put up this art exhibition. I persuaded him to do this. And he doesn't seem to be too happy about that."

"That's pretty mean, you know," Kagome scolded but couldn't help smiling.

"I know... But I had to. People must see these. They're amazing, he shouldn't keep his talent hidden..."

"True. Umm.. I was just wondering.."

"Yes?" she asked brightly.

"As you are his secretary, you must know him pretty well, right?"

"Oh, I've known him for _ages_!"

"Then would you know the girl who was the model for this painting?"

The woman laughed.

"Yes, I know her as well."

At that moment, the peace and quiet of the art exhibition was harshly destroyed.

"Sesshy-darling!" squealed a high female voice.

Kagome and Mrs. Miyame turned to see a beautiful dark-haired woman in a fur-coat clinging to Sesshoumaru's arm.

"Uh.. is she.. like his girlfriend or something?" Kagome asked blinking in confusion.

Mrs. Miyame gulped at the expression Sesshoumaru was had on his face.

"No, she's not his girlfriend at all. If you'll excuse me, Higurashi-san, I have to go and save Sesshoumaru-sama."

Mrs. Miyame hurried over to her boss.

"Yuka-chan, could you help me?"

"Uh, sure."

Together they pulled the woman away from Sesshoumaru.

The secretary spared one glance at her employer and gulped again. She had better to hurry.

"Higurashi-san, if you please would help Yuka-chan to see her off?"

"Hai."

Kagome hurried to take over Miyame's place and they started walking towards the door, as Mrs. Miyame grabbed Sesshoumaru's sleeve and dragged him into a small empty room.

* * *

"Sesshoumaru-sama! Calm down. That was too close."

He didn't reply, only took a deep breath.

"Your sealing spell nearly broke! You shouldn't lose your temper like that," she continued to scold him, shaking her finger at the demon lord.

"I can't stand that woman," he spat out behind his gritted teeth.

"I know that, Sesshoumaru-sama," she replied and sighed. "I'd still prefer you wouldn't kill anyone."

He answered with a growl.

"It would only draw needless attention and it would be really difficult to explain," his secretary pointed out.

"I am fully aware of that, Rin," he said coldly.

She sighed again.

"Sure you are, Sesshoumaru-sama. I just thought it would not hurt to remind you."

Sesshoumaru said nothing.

"We should get back now. Yuka-chan and Higurashi-sama must have –" Rin stopped all of a sudden.

"It's her, isn't it Sesshoumaru-sama?" she asked in a weak voice.

"What are you talking about, Rin?"

"Higurashi-san! She's the pretty lady who followed Inu yasha!" Now that she had said it out loud she grew more certain of her discovery.

"Yes. She's the miko."  
"How has she survived all this time? Could she have done it in the same way as I?"

"Unlikely. She does not reek of any male youkai."

"How strange..." an idea hit her. "What do you think of Higurashi-san, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"It is peculiar that she has survived the 500 years, but she is but a low, pitiful human."

"I am a human too, Sesshoumaru-sama," Rin reminded him, looking slightly hurt – although most of it was feigned.

"You are different."

"How do you know she's not different as well, if you don't even get to know her?" the young woman insisted.

"Enough said, Rin. We will go back now."

* * *

Everything was calm again when they returned to the main gallery room. Kagome was again standing in front of the painting of the girl with the flowers.

"Sorry to bother you with that, Higurashi-san," Rin apologised.

"It's okay, Miyame-san."

"Please, call me Rin."

"Very well Rin-chan," Kagome smiled. "Who was she anyway?"  
"Yameko Kagura. She has decided to become Mrs. Hisakata - but Seshoumaru-sama doesn't approve, as you just saw."

"What a weird woman."

"Well, Sesshoumaru-sama is handsome and wealthy," Rin shrugged.

"Yes, but if you can clearly see you that have no chance, why bother to keep trying?"

"True. Besides, Sesshoumaru-sama has told her quite plainly that he's not interested - several times.

"Uh, persistent one, isn't she?"

Rin giggled.

"You have no idea. She's always annoying me, pleading to arrange a meeting with Seshoumaru-sama."

"Oh, poor you."

"Oh... You wanted to ask something about the model of this painting, Kagome-nee-chan?"

Kagome was a bit taken aback by the familiarity this woman seemed to display towards her. Actually calling her a sister after they had just met? Kagome shrugged it off, figuring that it was just the way Rin was.

"Uh, yes... I just wondered what happened to her."

Rin smiled warmly.

"She grew up, got married and lived a long and happy life."

"I'm glad. She looks so.. Innocent and pure."

"Maybe that's why Sesshoumaru-sama liked her. You know, he does not tend to like hu- people."

"I've noticed," Kagome said dryly. "I've only met him once and it was rather brief, but the look he had in his eyes was so cold that it would exceed the absolute zero anytime."

Rin giggled.

"Where did you meet him?" she inquired.

"He stopped by in the restaurant that I'm working at."

"You work at a restaurant? How cool!"

"You think so? I think being a secretary seems cooler."

"Nah, it's actually very boring," Rin grinned.

A question popped in her head. Before Kagome thought over it more, she noticed she was already asking it out loud.

"Have you noticed that Hisakata-san seems to have a purple crescent moon on his brow?"

Rin stared at her in complete surprise.

"You must be mistaken, Kagome-nee-chan," Rin shook her head.

Kagome frowned.

"But now when we are talking about him, tell me what do you think of him."

Kagome bit her lip.

"Well... He's definitely good-looking. He seems to have some kind of an attitude problem though," Kagome snorted. " But the thing that keeps bothering me is that I feel.. I feel like I would have seen him somewhere long ago. Like I would know him in some way... Which is stupid, 'cause I've never even talked to him in person... Except the time he came to the restaurant and I asked if he wants milk or sugar in his coffee."

Rin giggled again. She clapped her hands together and her eyes were sparkling.

"I have to go back to Sesshoumaru-sama now." Rin hugged the miko. "See you, Kagome-nee-chan!"

"See you, Rin-chan!" Kagome was glad to get a new friend. Rin seemed to be very sweet and sincere person.

As Rin was walking back to Sesshoumaru's side, a coy smile appeared onto her lips. She had an idea. A really good, interesting idea...


	4. Tangled

**Disclaimer:** No, I don't own Inuyasha. I don't own rights for using the title from the song tangled, again from Maroon5... It's called stealing. –shows her famous innocent face-

**Chapter three - Tangled**

"My dear, you're scaring me," Miyame Hitachi said, eyeing his mate. He was a tall, dignified and caring man, who had long blond hair and sparkling green, cat-like eyes – after all, he _was_ a cat demon. When Rin had been seventeen, Hitachi had become the taiyoukai of southern lands. Seeing that he was an honourable man, Sesshoumaru-sama had given his blessing to them and Rin had become his mate. She was still close to Sesshoumaru-sama, though. She saw him every day, for she was working as his secretary.

Hitachi smiled. He sure had been lucky.

Rin, who had a cunning expression on her face glanced back at her mate.

"I just happened to meet someone today. Someone, whom I kind of know."

"Oh?" Hitachi raised his eyebrow.

"You know the legend of Inu-tachi, right?"

"Sure... Hanyou Inuyasha challenged hanyou Naraku in order to try to win himself the Shikon no Tama. He gained victory, but for that he had to pay the lives of his comrades. And they say that after the final battle he committed Seppuku himself."

"And what about Shikon no Tama? Or the miko?" Rin asked coyly.

"Both were not found afterwards. The legend says the miko got killed too, but her body was not to be found."

Rin nodded.

"That's right, that's what the legend says. Though it would seem that the legend is not quite accurate. The person I mention I met today was the miko of that story."

Hitachi blinked.

"But how could that be? The miko is only a human."

"I am only a woman, dear," Rin reminded a bit pointedly.

"Yes, but you are mated to me and thus you will live as long as I shall live." Hitachi wrapped his arms around her and placed a tender kiss on her soft lips.

"True... Even Sesshoumaru-sama doesn't know how she could have survived. It seems she does not have a youkai mate." Rin started to giggle. "At least not as for now."

Hitachi studied his mate.

"All right, I know that face. Spit out what you are plotting."

"Don't you agree that Sesshoumaru-sama has been alone for quite a long time?"

"He has you and Kanna."

"I didn't mean it like that, Hitachi."

"Well, in that case he has Kagura," the cat youkai grinned.

"Hitachi!" Rin cried.

He laughed.  
"Sorry, dear, I couldn't resist." Hitachi got serious again. "But if you are planning to get Sesshoumaru to mate that miko, you're going to need loads of good luck. You see, it's impossible. Sesshoumaru-sama would never..."

"Well, I can still try, can't I? Kagome-nee-chan is a sweet and caring girl. It'd be the perfect match!"

Hitachi stared at his mate and sighed. When she wore that expression she would not be persuaded.

He could only wait and see...

* * *

"You shouldn't have been so rude to her. She brooded to me the whole day on the phone. Like I would care."

"You know how much I dislike her. And actually I did nothing. It was Rin who was dragging her out."

"I see."

The young woman flipped a lock of her white hair over her shoulder.

"I am very close of getting rid of her – permanently," Sesshoumaru continued after a few minutes' silence

"What is stopping you?"

"Rin does not want me to kill her."

"And that's the only reason?"

"Yes."

"How peculiar."

"Have you heard?"

"Heard about what?"

"That she's alive."

"Who?"

"The miko."

"How?"

"I don't know."

"Strange..."

The two withdrawn demons fell silent for awhile.

"I had better get going," the young woman said as she got up.

Sesshoumaru rose to his feet and saw her off to the door.

"Thank you for the visit, Kanna."

"Anytime, Sesshoumaru-sama."

* * *

"Welcome!" Mrs. Higurashi hugged tightly her daughter and then her future son-in-law.

"I hope you have been well, Higurashi-san," Hojo reckoned politely.

"I've been just fine, thank you. Now, come in, dears, come in!"

They stepped in and left their coats on the rack and their shoes under it.

As they sat down at the dinner-table, they greeted Kagome's grandfather. Souta was away, visiting a friend of his.

"What a pity you missed him," Mrs. Higurashi told them.

Kagome looked over the table to Hojo. He nodded in approval. Kagome swallowed, feeling oddly nervous.

"Mom?"

"Yes, dear?"

"We've got something to tell..."

"Yes?"

Hojo nodded again in approval and Kagome flashed him a grateful smile.

"Hojo proposed to me a few days ago and well, we are engaged now."

Kagome's grandfather congratulated them as Mrs. Higurashi dropped her spoon.

For a moment her gaze bounced from Hojo to her daughter, then she gave out a muffled scream.

"Oh, congratulations!" she picked up her spoon. "When will the wedding be held?" she asked, her eyes twinkling eagerly.

"Mom," Kagome wailed, blushing in embarrassment.

Hojo started to laugh and glanced at Kagome. She looked so sweet when she was blushing.

"We haven't yet given any thought to the wedding," he told Mrs. Higurashi.

The two started a conversation. Kagome's grandpa soon joined them in the discussion.

Kagome was poking the food around her plate with her spoon. She did not quite know what was wrong with her. She should be overjoyed. Then why the only feeling she could define was alarmingly resembling a panic of some kind? Rest of her feelings were on a messy knot she could not undo. She felt a tiny twinge of nausea as the wedding was mentioned.

... It was just normal nervousness of a bride-to-be, right? She was feeling awfully awkward, as she watched how her fiancé was casually discussing with her mother and grandfather. Kagome wanted to get up and go for a walk to clear her head and untie the knot of her confused feelings.

But instead she forced a smile on her face, started to eat and joined in the discussion.

* * *

"It went rather well, didn't it?" Hojo said happily, when they were in his car on their way home.

"Yes, it was great," she smiled to herself.

He pulled over to the side of the street, in front of the building where Kagome's apartment was in.

"See you soon, I hope," Hojo said, admiring her with his stare.

"Yeah, hope so," she echoed. "Bye Hojo."

He bent closer and kissed her.

She shivered, but whether it was from disgust or delight, she could not tell.

Was this all some kind of an after-shock of the proposal? It had to be.

Kagome got out of the car and waved to Hojo as he drove away.

She stepped into the building and climbed the stairs up to the third floor, where her apartment was in. As she reached her door she pulled the keys out of her pocket and opened the door, stepping in. She took off her shoes and her coat. Kagome sighed. She felt hungry, although she had just been having a dinner with her family. She just had not felt like eating anything back then. She had felt so confused, nervous and a little sick too. The knot of emotions she could not clear to herself was heavily weighing in her chest. She had forced herself to eat although she had not been hungry then, but now, now she was hungry. She lazily walked over to the fridge and opened the door. Typical, there were only cat-food tins in the fridge. She made a mental note to herself to go to do some grocery shopping after the work tomorrow. So, pizza it was. She dialled the number of the pizza-delivery and made her order. Then she hung up and threw herself on the sofa. She frowned. She could not untie the messy knot, nor define the feelings that formed it. What exactly were her feelings towards Hojo? What had been her true reaction to the proposal? What did she truly want? She couldn't answer any of those questions before she could work out that knot and realise what she exactly was feeling. And she didn't know where to begin with. She sighed to herself, deciding to let the knot be for the time being. Maybe it would untie itself. It would all clear up with enough time given, right? Absentmindedly she petted Shue, who had jumped onto her lap. Yawning, she decided that a little nap wouldn't hurt.

* * *

She watched the black-haired woman in elegant clothes standing in front of her, holding her purse tightly against her chest, her golden diamond rings glittering. Oh no, not her again.  
"Hello, Kagura-san."  
"Hello, Rin-san. Would you please inform Sesshy-darling that I'm here and that I wish to see him?" Kagura eyed coldly the dark-haired woman sitting casually behind the wooden desk. How could Sesshoumaru stand that annoying little brat?  
"Oh, you mean you're not going to rush in through that door and throw yourself all over him like you did yesterday at the art exhibition?"  
"Shut up little bitch!" Kagura snapped. "Just tell him that I'm here."  
"I'm afraid I can't do that," Rin replied calmly, turning back to type the e-mail she had been typing before the unwanted interruption.  
"What do you mean 'can't'?"  
"He is not here."  
"What?" Kagura hissed sharply.  
Rin took a deep breath before turning her dark eyes to the wind demon. She then started to speak with a gentle tone, the kind of which people usually used when explaining something difficult to small children.  
"Sesshoumaru-sama is not available at the moment. He left his office half an hour ago."  
"Where did he go then?"  
"I don't know. He reckoned that it is not required for me to know his reasons or locations."  
Kagura huffed in annoyance. She could not stand that little brat. The casual secretary always made her blood boil.  
Rin sighed again. She could not stand that stupid bitch. Her constant attempts to meet her "Sesshy-darling", just to be turned away by him, were a true pain in her ass.  
They glared at each other for a moment. Then Kagura turned around and stormed out of the office.  
Rin couldn't help herself anymore but burst into giggles. It might have been a small victory, but it was a victory nonetheless.

* * *

She awoke as the doorbell rang.  
Must be the pizza-boy, she thought to herself, standing up and dropping Shue onto the floor from her lap. She tried to fix her messy hair as she walked over to the door and opened it. Indeed there was the pizza, carried by a young dark-haired man.  
"Here you go, it's 1000 yen."  
"Wait a second I'll go and get my money –"  
She caught a sight of him from the corner of his eye and stopped. She turned back to face him and looked at him more closely. And then her vision started to blur all of a sudden. She blinked and shook her head in attempt to regain her clear sight.  
He looked at her his eyebrow raised. What was wrong with her now?  
Kagome's vision cleared. She gasped and then slowly backed away from the pizza-boy.  
"What the heck are you doing here with that pizza?"  
Exactly what kind of question was that? he thought dryly to himself. It was quite obvious, wasn't it.  
"How does it look like? I'm delivering it to you."  
Kagome raised quickly her finger, pointing at him with it.  
"Oh you are? Hahaha. Why would you be doing something so stupid?"  
"Because that's my job?"  
It seemed to him that her travels with his useless hanyou half brother had had their side-effects. She had apparently lost her mind.  
"Your job my ass! You're Rin-chan's boss, Hisakata Sesshoumaru!"  
It was on that moment when Sesshomaru actually felt surprised. But of course, he did not show it.  
"What are you talking about, woman? I'm just an ordinary pizza-boy."  
"HA! That silver hair, those amber eyes and that freaky purplish crescent moon on your brow that nobody else than me can't see. You're Sesshoumaru."  
He stared at her. That wench was able to see through his sealing spell? Impossible.  
They glared wordlessly at one another.  
And then his inner demon raised its head.  
It was here. Now.  
He screwed up his eyes.  
"So you are using Shikon no Tama in order to see through my sealing spell?"  
Kagome blinked.  
"Huh? What are you talking about? What spell? What Tama?"  
"Don't play stupid with me, miko," he warned on a low cold tone.  
"Miko? Me?" Just what was he talking about again? Kagome came into a simple conclusion: He was mad!  
"Are you serious just now?"  
"You think I'm not serious?" Kagome asked confused. How had he supposed she would have reacted then?  
Sesshoumaru watched her with his cold intensive stare.  
She was not lying. Then what was wrong with her?  
"Argh. Whatever, I don't care."  
He watched her turning away from him, stomping in annoyance out of his sight.  
She had more temper that he had thought.  
Sesshoumaru groaned. His inner demon grinned.  
She soon returned with the money, which she shoved into his palm and grabbed the pizza from his hands.  
Sesshoumaru stared at the door she had just slammed at his face.  
Great, now he had to think about something new...  
He took his mobile phone out of his pocket.  
"This is Miyame, Hisakata-san's secretary speaking."  
"Rin, get me the miko's e-mail address."  
"Sesshoumaru-sama, why would you – "  
"Just get it. Now."  
"Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama!"

* * *

Kagome took a slice of pizza and sat down at the dining table. What a freak! Honestly, talking all that bullshit that nobody understood. And what the heck that pizza-delivering-thing had been about? Seesh. Well, at least the pizza was good.

She pulled her laptop closer and switched it on. While she was waiting it to boot up, she took another slice of the pizza. She opened her browser and logged in to her e-mail account.

5 new messages.

The first one was from Eri.

"_Hey Kagome. You're not going to believe this! The woman that we saw yesterday at the art-exhibition, the freaky one who had to be dragged out, is a black widow - type!_

_She has been married three times. All of he__r husbands have been extremely wealthy. - That explains that silly fur-coat. Anyway, every time _something _has happened to her husbands, and she ends up being an extremely wealthy widow!_

_See ya soon again, I hope!_

_Love Eri_

_Ps. I've started dating a cop!"_

Yeah right, Kagome rolled her eyes. Eri was clearly making the story up. Kagome chuckled. The black widow thing was as real as her dog-eared dream boy.

Next message was just bare trash. Following that one, was the reply from her e-mail friend. Kagome squealed happily.

"_Hey there, Kagome-chan!_

_I've been just fine, hope you've been too? My hand is back to normal again. Though, I've felt little sick lately.__ : / I think I'm coming down with something... –shrugs- Oh well. What doesn't kill you... Or so they say. :P_

_You shouldn't worry __about things so much. You're not going crazy! Dreams are always weird. _

_Honestly, if you just knew what kind of things _I've _dreamed about, you would call your dreams perfectly normal. :D_

_Surely it's just a weird coincidence that he was right there. Or then there's a logical explanation. Like if you've seen him somewhere before or so..? Anyway, he doesn't sound __like a nice guy at all. ó.O Maybe he has a problem with his attitude or something? Anyway, the world is full of jerks, so you really should get used to it, hun. _

_And about the crescent-moon__... Well, I don't know what to say. O.o sounds pretty weird to me. _

_BUT! Hojo-kun proposed! AAAWW! So cute! I'm so happy for you! Honestly! Do I get invited to the wedding? How are you feeling about it?_

_I was in the sevent__h heaven when Kouga proposed me. It was a feeling you can't really describe. -dreamy smile- Such a strong, overwhelming joy...!_

_Oh, by the way, how was the art exhibition you went to with your friends? And the dinner then? I hope you had fun._

_Oh, I got to go. . Seems like the twins are arguing. sigh_

_Take care! H__ugs!_

_-__ Ayame"_

Kagome smiled. She loved e-mails she got from Ayame. She was married with Kouga-kun and had 3 children. A boy who was 7 years old and twins, who were 5. Kagome replied immediately.

"_Hey Ayame-chan!_

_I hope your sickness goes by. Honestly!_

_Hmm. My feelings about the __proposal? -sigh- The truth is, I don't really know. I'm confused, nervous and.. I don't know. Is this how I should feel or is there just something wrong with me? I feel like my feelings would be just one huge and messy knot in my chest that I can't untie. :x I was happy at first, but now... I don't _know.

_The art-exhibition was great. Guess who was the artist? THE SAME RUDE CRESCENT-GUY! -rolls her eyes- If everything happens for a reason, I'm getting worried. At the moment I prefer coincidence. But, he was truly__ a talented artist. Yuka-chan told me he's the owner of a big and successful corporation, and that he's really rich. That could explain his attitude-problem a bit. What a snob!_

_Anyway, I met his secretary in the exhibition. She was very sweet and sincere young woman. I hope we can become friends! Oh! And then in the art exhibition was this really freaky woman too. o.O She's all head over heels for Sesshoumaru-__**sama**__ (aka the rude guy. Boldened to convey my sarcasm better.) and actually clung into his arm. o.O He didn't seem to be too happy about that! You should have just seen his face... It was rather scary. And Eri told me she'd be some kind of black-widow-type-woman, you know what I mean? ... Eri has too wild imagination. _

_The dinner today... Well, it went fine, food was __good, mom was happy and so on. -rolls her eyes- But somehow I felt.. I don't know, disturbed? Troubled? Uneasy? Something along those lines..._

_OH! Talking about coincidences! I __ordered a pizza when I got home, for I was still hungry. Well, just _guess _who was the pizza-delivering-guy? Sesshoumaru! Think about highly talented artist and owner of successful, wealthy company. Why the hell was he standing behind my door, delivering me a pizza? I'm getting annoyed of these "coincidences". Sure he's hot and all, I admit, but honestly, that attitude of his! -groan- Oh, and he's bloody out of his mind! Talking about stuff like something "Tama", calling me miko and so on. Sheesh!_

_Anyway, I hope you're doing fine! _

_HUGS!_

- _Kagome"_

"Message sent."

Kagome felt better after discharging her frustration and annoyance into the e-mail. She clicked next message open. It was a note from the book store that a book she had ordered had arrived. Well, it was about time!

The last message was from an address Kagome did not recognise. She clicked it open.

"_Kagome Higurashi-san,_

_I would like to inform you that _I have my ways of knowing_. And I assure you that if I _ever _hear that a word of the nature of our meeting of today has slipped out of your mouth, I will _personally _make sure that your entrails will be ripped out of your sorry stomach._

_Yours, sincerely_

_Hisakata S."_


	5. Soul of a vagabond

**Disclaimer: **Inuyasha mine - NOT! Title belonging to Stratovarius...

**Chapter four - The soul of a vagabond**

Ayame sat back down at her computer screen and sighed. Why did the twins always have to fight with one another? She shook her head.

What? A new message? Kagome had already replied to her e-mail?

She opened it up. Her green eyes moved quickly along the lines she read. She gasped and gave a sharp hiss. What?

"Kouga-dear, come over here. You're so not going to believe this."

The black-haired wolf-prince, also known as the taiyoukai of the northern lands, walked up to his mate.

"What is it, Ayame?"

"It's an e-mail. From... My e-mail friend," Ayame replied. She had not told Kouga about her e-mail friend's true identity. Although she knew Kouga loved her now, she still did not want to take any risks. And how would Kouga take the news of the situation? Of course, Ayame realised that she could not keep this secret from him forever. She would tell him... Eventually... Maybe...

"Oh, has she been fine?" Kouga asked, waking Ayame from her thoughts.

"Well, she's feeling quite confused. You see, she's been running into a certain someone lately - by a sheer coincidence."

"Oh?"

"Sesshoumaru."

"What?" Kouga bent closer to the computer screen and started to read the message through. He never finished it, since when he reached the part which his mate had wanted him to read, he burst into laughter and actually fell onto the floor as his knees gave in.

"Sesshoumaru..? As a pizza-boy?" he managed to bark out in the middle of his laughter.

Ayame giggled along him.

When Kouga had been able to calm down a bit - and after he had wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes - he took out his mobile phone. After dialling the correct number, he sat down on a chair and waited.

"Hitachi," the taiyoukai of southern lands answered.

"Yo, it's me, Kouga!"

"Hey there, haven't heard about you for awhile. How's it going?"

"I'm just fine... Hey, listen. What the heck is up with this pizza-delivering-thing?"

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking 'bout the mighty Sesshoumaru-sama, taiyoukai of the western lands, working as a pizza delivering boy."

"He _what?_ How do you know about this?"

"Ayame has been e-mailing with some human woman who has lately been running into Sesshoumaru. And it appears that today he had appeared behind her door with a pizza."

Hitachi tried his best. He really did try. Sadly it just wasn't enough. Kouga quickly jerked the phone away as a loud bang was heard.

"Hitachi? What just happened there, man?"

He got no answer.

"Hitachi!" He yelled into the phone.

Few minutes later Hitachi spoke again.

"Sorry, I just dropped the phone."

Kouga chuckled.

"I understand, pal. Well, if you didn't know, then sorry to bother."

"It's okay... By the way, we should have a meeting sometime soon, don't you think?"

"Hmm, let's see... It was twenty years ago since all four taiyoukais gathered together the last time."

"Exactly. And isn't it the pizza-boy himself who should be hosting the meeting this time?"

"Yes," Hitachi answered, trying his best not to burst into laughter again.

"In that case, the sooner we have the meeting the better. How about the day after tomorrow?"

"Fine with me."

"Great," Kouga chuckled. This was going to be fun... "See you then, right?"

"Right. Bye, Kouga!"

Hitachi hung up. He laughed quietly for some time.

Then he took out his phone again.

"Hello?"

"Hello Sadoko-san. It's me, Hitachi."

"Miyame-san! It's been ages!"

"I know... Uh, so, Kouga-kun just called me and we decided to have a meeting again. There hasn't been one for 20 years, so it's about time. Don't you agree?"

"Oh, certainly! I would _love_ to see Rin-san and Ayame-san again... Who's hosting?"

"Sesshoumaru... Oh, and talking about Sesshoumaru... You are not going to believe this..."

* * *

"No way! Sesshoumaru-sama as a pizza-boy? Dear, you must have been mistaken..."

"I'm telling you, Rin, it's true."

"Yeah right... Oh, sorry I have to hang up, there's another call."

"All right. See you in few hours."

"Bye."

Rin cleared her throat and picked up the receiver.

"Mrs. Miyame, Mr. Hisakata's secretary speaking... Oh, Yorukawa-san... Yes, there is a meeting appointed with Hisakata-sama tomorrow, at the lunch time. The place of meeting? Hmm... Could you please wait a moment?" Rin put the business call on the hold and dialled a new number.

"Hello?"

"Yuka-chan? It's me, Rin-chan. Listen, could you tell me the name and the address of the restaurant where Kagome-nee-chan is working?"

"Uhh, sure.." Yuka answered.

* * *

An alert window popped out.

"You have one new message."

He clicked it and an e-mail opened.

"_Dear Hisakata-sama._

_I was__ very touched by the concern you showed towards me. I also would like to inform you, that_

_1. I am unwilling to obey your friendly suggestion, and,_

_2. Your message came a little bit too late. _

_So, in your face! I already told one of my friends, and I'm pretty sure the word is at the moment spreading all over Japan. "S. Hisakata, the pizza-boy" will be in headlines first thing tomorrow._

_... I'm really looking forward to my punishment._

_Your humble servant,_

_Kagome__ Higurashi _

_PS. In case you did not get it, it's called sarcasm. _JERK_!" _

Sesshoumaru growled. That bitch...!

"Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Sesshoumaru turned and saw Rin standing at his doorway, holding back a giggle.

"Hitachi just called me and told me to inform you that you'll be hosting the taiyoukai meeting that's arranged to take place the day after tomorrow."

"What?"

"There has not been a meeting of taiyoukais for 20 years," Rin reminded him. "So, Kouga-kun and Hitachi decided we'll have one. Oh, And Hitachi has already informed Abi-san too."

Sesshoumaru gritted his teeth. Great. Just what he needed...

"I'd also want to remind you of a meeting with Yorukawa-san tomorrow at eleven... The address of the restaurant is here..." She handed a note for him.

Sesshoumaru glanced at it shortly.

"Was that all?"

"Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama... Although... Hitachi was telling me about something he called a 'pizza incident'... "

It could not be.

Barely an hour had passed since the miko had slammed that door at his face and now Rin was telling him _Hitachi_ had mentioned... What the hell? She had not been kidding in the e-mail, as he had assumed by the sarcasm note, but honestly told someone? And how in the hell did Hitachi know about this?

He would have to take some actions soon, to make the taiyoukai of southern lands keep his mouth shut. Just imagine how the meeting would be, if all the other taiyoukais too would know about his little "hobby"... Sesshoumaru twitched. No, He really didn't want that to happen. His reputation and image would be ruined after that. Completely ruined...

"I'm going home."

"Huh?"

"You heard me Rin. I'm going home. Maybe you should go too."

"But Sesshoumaru-sama -"

"It's Sunday anyway. I don't feel like sitting here when it's weekend." A hint of what could have been disgust flashed in his eyes.

"As you wish, Sesshoumaru-sama." Rin sighed.

The taiyukai got up, took his briefcase and marched out from his office.

Rin stared at his back. Something was bothering him... Rin sighed again. Well, it was Sesshoumaru-sama.. He would not bother to tell anyone of what would be worrying him..

That's why, he'd need a mate.

Rin giggled. And a mate was what he would get...

* * *

Seshoumaru looked at the note where was the address. Then he looked at the restaurant in front of him. _This_ was the place Rin had chosen? He shrugged and stepped in. It was a small place, but didn't seem to be too bad. There was only one waitress. Her back was facing him and he soon found himself staring at her figure. She wore a black pleated skirt that was mid-thigh length. She was alsp wearing a white blouse, which could barely be seen under the cascade of her black hair.

Sesshoumaru raised his silver eyebrow.

His inner demon truly liked what it saw. It gave a lecherous grin.

Sesshoumaru gave his inner demon a firm shake. The woman was a mere human. Having such trail of thoughts was inappropriate.

But apparently his inner demon did not care of what was appropriate and what was not.

Sesshoumaru started giving lecturing his primal self.

The waitress turned around.

It was her "EEP!" that interrupted the mental ramble and Sesshoumaru's eyes flew to look at the waitress.

She gulped and Sesshoumaru could clearly tell that she was very, very nervous. And for a very, very good reason.

"You," it was a low cold growl.

"Now, violence is not needed..." She smiled nervously and raised her hands on the level of her chest, in a futile attempt of protecting herself.

He cracked his knuckles not letting his cold stare leave her brown eyes.

"I told you not to tell anyone."

That was it. She was not usually such a short-tempered person, but it was something about him that always seemed to make that side of her stand out.

"Well, it's not _my_ fault that you said it too late."

Sesshoumaru was still growling. He was actually a bit surprised that his eyes did not start to bleed red. Then he noticed that the reason, why that did not happen, was because his inner demon was not angry. It was amused.

_Useless annoyance_, he mentally kicked his other self.

"Besides, I only told one person! And that's my e-mail friend who lives in Hokkaido."

Sesshoumaru stopped. If she had told a friend who lived in Hokkaido, how could Rin say she had heard from Hitachi that... Sesshoumaru frowned.

As she noticed that she had managed to distract him and that her life no longer was in an immediate danger, she relaxed a bit.

"So, did you come here to deduct my entrails, or to have a lunch, maybe?"

He shot her with the famous freezing glare though it did not seem to affect her quite as much as he had planned.

Sesshoumaru walked to a table and sat down. She followed him.

"What?" He barked out one eyebrow raised.

"Your order, sir?"

Oh right, she _was_ the waitress. He felt his inner demon laughing at him.

Shut up, Seshoumaru barked at him. Sadly he did not listen.

"I will take only a cup of coffee."

"Right away!" the waitress turned around to get the coffee-pot and the cup. However before she could go, long fingers wrapping themselves around wrist stopped her. His touch caused her to shiver.

"Yes," she asked on a weak voice.

"I'm waiting for company. So if anyone asks me, you know what to do."

"Hai, Hisakata-sama."

He released his grip and let her go.

She returned soon carrying a cup of coffee. She placed it on the table in front of him.

"Here you go."

He did not bother to thank her.

Her eye twitched. That... attitude... Her neck suddenly tingled as if someone would be staring at her. She turned her head and saw a young man who wore glasses and a neat suit and who was carrying a briefcase. It seemed he had just stepped in.

"Welcome, how can I help you," she chirped with a smile.

"Uhm, I'm here to have a short meeting with Hisakata-sama, so if you please..."

"I see, this way please." The waitress led him to the table Sesshoumaru was sitting in. The men greeted each other.

"May I take you order, sir?"

"I need nothing, thank you."

The waitress smiled again and walked away.

* * *

The words kept coming. They went in from his right ear and came out from his left one, none of them really bothered to say in his head. He didn't notice as the calm stream of words suddenly ended and a heavy, oppressive atmosphere wrapped him. He awoke as he heard his partner clear his throat. He quickly jerked his head to see burning, cold amber eyes staring at him with a dangerous flash in them.

"You did not listen a word that I said," his partner said with a scary low tone.

"My apologies, Hisakata-sama," He bowed. "My attention was... disturbed."

"I noticed," Sesshoumaru said glancing the miko from the corner of his eye.

"But surely you understand, Hisakata-sama?" He chuckled nervously. "Such a lovely waitress..."

"Pick up women on your free time," Sesshoumaru spat out. "Now we are supposed to have a meeting about the project."

"Oh, yes..."

What was it about her that made people stare at her and gather around her? Sesshoumaru shook his head. Whatever reason it was, he was _not_ interested. Too bad, that his inner demon was.

* * *

"Oh what a day!" Kagome threw herself on her favourite spot on the sofa and pulled Shue over into her lap.

"You know, it's really a miracle that I'm still alive," she told her cat. She had not bothered to tell anyone else but Ayame about the incident with the pizza, and she really wondered how could he have already found that out. Well, she had told it in her reply to his e-mail, but still... She sighed.

More confusing was the shiver she had got when he had took a hold on her wrist. She had shivered because she had been a bit frightened of him, right? Why else then would she have shivered...?

Though, in her mind she knew she had been more annoyed than scared of him back then. So, why had she shivered?

"I'm hopeless", Kagome announced to her empty apartment.

_The demon rose in front of her. It extended its huge hand to slash her into tiny pieces. She screamed._

"_Kagome, stay back!" _

_The red-clad, dog-eared boy rushed forward and sliced the hand neatly with his claws._

_A huge boomerang came whirling through the air, hitting the head of their enemy. The black-haired taiji__ya smirked._

_The little Kitsune pup was in her arms, shivering._

"_It's okay, it'll be over soon," Kagome said, stroking his back soothingly._

_A muffled scream escaped from her lips as she was thrown harshly aside._

"_Sango!" the monk shouted, hurrying over to the woman._

_The Hanyou growled and finished the demon off with a wave of his big sword._

* * *

He watched his desk, hidden under the piles of paper and yet more paper. He got up and walked over to the window. The city spread before him, its lights glowing into the dark evening. He heard the door of his office open.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, I'm leaving now."

"Go on, Rin."

"You should go home too," Rin advised. "Hitachi could drop you off on our way home."

"No thank you," Sesshoumaru declined, still staring out of the window. "I think I'm going to walk today."

"You sure?"

"Positive."  
"Fine then... Goodbye, Sesshoumaru-sama! See you tomorrow!"

"Goodbye, Rin."

She closed the door as she left.

He wanted to walk. An odd restlessness was tugging his soul. He felt... old. This big city, full of humans... It was depressing him. He longed for the times when the numbers of humans and youkai had been equal... The times he had been free to roam the lands he owned. One couldn't even see the stars anymore now, he observed darkly.

Those foolish humans and their absurd ideas. Always building up new cities... Destroying everything that stood in their way... He couldn't stand them. They made him sick. And they were everywhere now.

He turned and walked out of his office. He let the cold evening breeze play with his hair. He hated this. The noise, the smells, the cars.. He hated all of it. He wanted desperately to escape. To turn back time.

And he knew he couldn't.

There was two possible things he would end up to do feeling like this. Either he would start painting or drinking.

The taiyoukai-meeting was tomorrow, he remembered. Better skip the drinking then, Sesshoumaru decided gloomily. Damn, it had been the more appealing option of the two.

* * *

She startled awake as her phone rang. She still felt sleepy.

"Higurashi?"

"Hello, my love!"

"Hojo? Hi."

"Have you got anything planned for this Friday?"

"No, nothing on Friday."

"Great! How about a dinner then? At my place, say around eight o'clock?"

Kagome was honest to herself. She didn't want to see Hojo. For some reason, she did not look forward to their dates or his phone calls anymore. She didn't want to sit down at the same table with him, and talk about everything possible. She did not want to go over at his place..

But though she was honest to herself, she wasn't honest to Hojo.

"I'd love to," she lied.

"Great! Listen, I'm sorry, but Friday's kind of a busy day for me, and I have to prepare everything and so forth... So I'm afraid I can't come to pick you up."

"It's all right. I'll take a cab or something."

"Good... See you on Friday then! I love you."

"I love - " for the briefest moment Kagome hesitated. Was she really telling the truth now, did she really mean what she was saying? Damn this confusion... "- you too. Bye!"

She sank back to the sofa and moaned, closing her eyes and starting to rub her temples. Why she had to be so confused?

It seemed that the knot in her chest had only grown bigger. How was it ever going to become untied? Kagome sighed. She needed tea and a hot shower. She needed chocolate and a good book to read and a blanket that she could wrap around her.

But most of all, she needed answers. Answers to ease her confused mind. And she needed that damn knot to be untied. She needed to know. How was she feeling about the situation she was in? How did she feel about a life together with Hojo? What did she feel for Hojo, anyway?

But the most frightening question, one that Kagome didn't even dare to really ask herself, but which still kept coming back into her confused mind over and over again, was what exactly was she feeling for a certain someone, called Hisakata Sesshoumaru?


	6. Anxiety

**Disclaimer: **Inuyasha characters © Rumiko Takahashi, chapter title from the song by Black Eyed peas

**Chapter five - Anxiety**

Her confusion was gaining a whole new level. Kagome was nearing a critical breaking point. She had but tossed and turned in her bed until the late hours in the morning and it felt like she had not slept at all. Sighing heavily she got up from her bed. She did all her usual morning rituals, those things she did every morning, but while she was doing them she felt somewhat disoriented.

_This isn't me, _she thought bitterly_. This is only a shadow I have left behind... The real me is gone, buried under that cursed knot._

She gave breakfast to Shue, and then leafed the newspaper through while drinking tea. She ate a toast and after that took a quick shower. After the shower she dried her hair, dressed, brushed her hair and put on some make up in a desperate attempt to cover up her pale, tired, haunted face.

She pulled the curtain aside and leaned against the frame of the window. She needed someone to show her the path for she was completely lost. The nearly sleepless night really took its toll on her. But yet, it was not the worst. She had a head ache, again. It was now the third day in a row when she felt the throbbing pain in the back of her head. It felt as a sort of head ache one might get, when trying hard to recall an event one has long since forgotten. She felt as if something wasn't quite right. And yet, everything was fine, so fine... Except for Hojo.

Hojo was sweet and caring and truly loved her... He was doing well with his studies and with his job. So why... Why had Kagome been feeling so insecure around him lately? Insecure of her feelings towards him... Everything had been all right before –

Kagome frowned.

Yes, it was true... Everything had been fine, before starting to see these stupid dreams of herself in that weird world. Ever since she had seen the first of those dreams, she had felt this odd restlessness, a feeling of loosing something. A name or word that was about to be remembered but yet was too far away to recall. She had felt incomplete. And had headaches every other day. Everything had been fine, before meeting Hisakata-sama. After meeting him... And after constantly running in to him in the weirdest of places and occasions... It was his fault. All his fault...

No, it wasn't. It was those bloody dreams.

Kagome sighed. She would need aspirin before going to work today. It was only Tuesday, she had the whole week ahead of her. She didn't feel like going to work at all, but she couldn't help it, she had to.

Her pained look wandered back to the window, to examine the city. There were few clouds on the sky and in the east the sky was light. The sun was rising.

* * *

He watched how the red tint started to spread over the whole sky. He was not looking forward at all to the taiyoukai-meeting this evening. He should get everything prepared... What would they talk about, anyway? Nowadays there were no ongoing wars between the lands, the peace was very stable and since the taiyoukai had known each other for centuries and got along well, keeping up diplomatic relations with the other taiyoukais was rather needless a reason for holding a meeting. Nowadays, taiyoukai-meeting seemed to be held just for the sake of tradition and socialising. They were nearly the only ones left. The number of youkais had greatly decreased. Only the strongest had survived. It was the wars, the epidemic and the melancholy... Yes, the agony. Many of the youkais had got tired of living in this changing world, in the world where humans ruled over all other races.

It sickened him. Sometimes he thought of a death by his own sword, almost hoping for it. Nothing really was keeping him here anymore. Rin had matured, she was independent and well taken care of by her mate. He no longer was responsible of the lands that once had been his. Why linger in this cursed world anymore?

His pride. His pride was what kept him here, kept him living. This Sesshoumaru would not give up, no matter what, he would never let go. Giving up was admitting one's own weaknesses, and this Sesshoumaru is far from weak.

"Oh, it's so realistic!"

He turned his head and saw his secretary, staring admiringly at the painting he had been painting all night long.

"Rin, what are you doing here?" Why was she in his home, on such an early hour?

"Sorry, Sesshoumaru-sama. I came with Hitachi, to help you with the preparations."

"I see."

Rin watched as he turned back to face the window, leaving Rin to stare at his back.

"May I ask you one thing?"

"Go on."

"Why did you paint this? Why did you paint them?"

"I had to." The image had popped into his mind, constantly haunting him, refusing to leave him alone until it had been transferred to the canvas.

"Okay... Anyway, we should get on with the preparations already. Have you had any breakfast yet?"

"No."

"Then come on!" Rin dragged him along.

* * *

"Good morning."

Kayade gasped. "Oh no, _NO_!"

"What?" Kagome asked, frowning.

"Have you checked yourself from the mirror?" Kayade asked, staring at her.

Kagome didn't bother to answer. She sat heavily down on the bench.

"Are you all right? You look awful."

"Thanks," Kagome said dryly on a tired voice.

"Seriously! How much sleep did you get last night?"

"I don't know," Kagome answered, covering her face with her hands. "But I'd guess none, 'cause that's the way I feel."

"Shaere-san," Kayade called out. "You'd better come here now and see this."

"What is it now?" the owner of the restaurant came into the little staff-room, scrubbing a plate with a cloth.

Kayade walked over to Kagome, and gently pulled her hands away covering her face.

Shaere stared at her for awhile.

"What on Earth has happened to you, child?"

"Confusion and few nights with poor sleep," Kagome replied and tried to smile. It wasn't a big success.

"Go home."

"What?"

"You heard me. Go home."

"But I can't, I –"

"I'm your boss, Kagome. I'll order you and not the other way 'round. And I'm telling you to go home, maybe take a few days off as well. You need good long rest."

"But –"

"What use you would be anyway, stomping around here like only being half alive?"

She startled. The comparison had hit the spot. She humbly bent her head.

"Hai, Shaere-san."

Shaere nodded and left the room.

Kayade helped Kagome up.

"Don't worry about us. We'll handle this. Now it's time for you to worry about yourself."

Kagome smiled weakly.

"Thank you."

"Am I your friend or not?" she beamed.

Kagome grabbed her purse and left the little restaurant. She decided to stop by in a grocery store before going home. In this kind of situation she was in, she needed chocolate. Lots and lots of chocolate.

* * *

Rin was cooking in the kitchen, preparing dinner for the taiyoukai-meeting which would start after the sunset. The food was the only thing left to be prepared, and they had decided that for everybody's sake it would be best to let Rin take care of that.

The black-haired woman was happily humming to herself, she loved to be in the kitchen. She put the roast meet into the oven and then leaned against the kitchen counter, sighing happily. A moment later she shivered when she felt a long finger running down her spine, caressing her back. She turned her head to the side, her brown eyes meeting bright green ones. And then his lips were pressed against hers. The kiss was soft and tender, it was full of affection, full of his warm feelings for her. When the kiss was broken, she sighed again, feeling even happier than before. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and held her close. She let her head fall to rest on his shoulder.

Sesshoumaru was sitting at the table, watching them, a bored look on his face. They loved each other. The word echoed oddly in his mind. Love. What good was it for, anyway? He allowed himself to be lost in his thoughts.

He was roughly brought back to Earth when he realised whom he had been thinking about the past minutes.

_What is your problem, _he growled to his demon self

_Look at them. They are happy together._

_Happiness is a feeling this Sesshoumaru does not need._

_Maybe so. But this is not question of need, but a question of want._

_Want?_

_Yes. I want a mate, _the demon Sesshoumaru said calmly.

_A mate? You got to be kidding. This Sesshoumaru needs no one._

_True. But this is still not a question of need. I _want _a mate. And I want it to be her._

_Why her?_

_Why not__?_

_Because she is a human. And a miko, _he grunted, disgusted of the thought

_Those kinds of things do__ not matter to me._

_Then why do you want her, precisely?_

His demon self was quiet for a while. Then, it replied.

_Because she has not changed._

Sesshoumaru frowned. What did he mean?

Rin pulled herself away from her mate.

"Take the roast out of the oven in 40 minutes."

"Where are you going?" Hitachi asked.

"I'll go and visit a friend of mine. Oh... We probably should let the other taiyoukais to know about the miko."

Hitachi nodded.

"I'll take the car," Rin said, searching for her keys.

"Fine. See you later, dear."

"Bye!"

The door closed.

Hitachi glanced Sesshoumaru, only to find out that his cold amber eyes were staring at him. The cat youkai shifted, feeling a little uncomfortable.

"What?"

"I want you to keep your mouth shut."

"Excuse me?"  
"I don't know from whom you did hear about my little... 'pizza incident'. But tonight, you had better keep quiet about that."

Hitachi swallowed his chuckle.

"Sure, Sesshoumaru-sama," he replied. Though, Kouga would without a doubt bring that exact incident up the moment he'd arrive. Hitachi almost pitied Sesshoumaru. Almost. He thought it was just good for his pride to get cracked every now and then. Maybe he would learn to be a little more humble. And maybe tomorrow they would wake up and see a day when finally the world peace would come.

* * *

Rin was standing behind a door. This had to be the right one, this was the address Yuka had given to her when she had asked it. She didn't even know what she was doing here. She had met her only once in this time, she didn't know her. And yet, she felt as if she just had to see her again. Random, already faded memories of the gentle miko, so sweet, so pure, ran in her mind. Trying to help her, ready to fight against the demons to save their lives. Something about her fascinated Rin. Something that made Rin to want see her, spend time with her, get to know her. She raised her hand and knocked the door.

There was no answer.

Maybe she was at work? She wasn't at home after all.

Rin pressed her ear to the door. A muffled whimper reached her ear.

She was home. And something was wrong. Rin frowned. She opened the door and stepped in.

Whatever she had been expecting, the sight that met her was far beyond her imagination. Kagome was sitting on her sofa, wrapped up in a blanket, staring at the plainness of wall, apparently without really seeing anything. Absentmindedly she ate pieces of chocolate and silent tears were rolling down her cheeks.

"Oh my! Kagome-nee-chan, what's wrong?"

Kagome startled and turned to look at Rin. She had not heard her to come in.

Rin almost took a step back when she saw her eyes. They were dimmed, reddened by all the tears and held so much silent pain that her deep confusion was causing.

"I - I'm confused," Kagome replied and sniffed.

Rin walked over to her and sat down next to her.

"You want to tell me about it?"

Kagome stared at her worried face for awhile and sniffed again.

"I... I don't know what I'm feeling. I... I'm engaged with Hojo, a guy who has had a crush on me since junior high. And well, ever since the proposal I've felt a bit insecure and awkward around him and I don't know why."

"Do you love him?"

"I.. I don't know. I like him a lot but I don't know if it's really love that I'm feeling. All my feelings are so tangled, so messed up... They're like a huge messy knot inside my chest. I can't really tell what I'm feeling and it confuses me. It makes me go crazy. And then these stupid dreams can't leave me alone, they make me so frustrated."

"What dreams?"

"I dream of myself being in some kind of a weird world where I travel with kitsune-pup, dog-eared boy and two dark-haired persons, a woman and a man. It's just so weird. I think I even saw your boss in there once."

Rin paled. What had happened to her? She had hoped that Kagome would have remembered all. Rin wanted to know how it all had really ended. How come she had survived? How did the battle against Naraku truly go? What had driven Inuyasha to kill himself?

It seemed she did not remember. Not a thing. But how could she have forgotten? Obviously she still remembered something, for she was seeing her faded memories as her dreams... But what had happened to her?

"But the worst is the feeling after each of such a dream. It feels awful. My head hurts and I feel a bit nauseous. You know when you try to recall something, a name or a word, very hard, and you know it's somewhere near your grasp but you still can't grab it from your mind? That kind of feeling it is."

Rin wrapped her comforting arms around her slender form.

"Don't worry. It'll all be better when enough time given, honestly. And the dreams probably mean nothing serious. I mean, dreams are always weird. I think they're supposed to be like that."

Kagome sniffed.

"Thanks."

She couldn't understand herself. Why was she spilling out this all? Why was she telling Rin-chan about her feelings and confusion? Honestly, she barely even knew her... But maybe that was why. Maybe it was easier to tell about her feelings and worries to someone that did not know her all the way through.

"Oh, look at the time!" Rin said, as she saw what the clock on Kagome's wall showed. She would be late from the meeting.

"I'm so sorry, but I got to go."

"It's okay, really."

"I hope you'll get better soon. Don't let this take too much toll on you."

"Yeah," Kagome mumbled. "Bye, Rin-chan."

Rin waved happily and in one turn of the door she was gone.

She was on her way to the staircase when she suddenly stopped and turned around.

What the –?

A small two-tailed cat with her fur the colour of cream was sitting right behind Kagome's door.

She walked over to the cat.

"Now what is this?" She asked aloud, staring at the cat. The cat mewled softly back.

"Demon cat on Kagome-nee-chan's doorstep? Interesting." Rin bent down and picked the cat up. The moment the cat youkai was in her arms, she felt a short and sudden stinging pain on the side of her neck and she automatically raised her hand to squash the imaginary bug.

Save for that the bug had not been imagined.

"Huh?" Rin stared at the flattened flea-youkai who rested on her hand. "What are you?"

The flea ignored her question.

"You smell of a powerful cat demon, ningen."

"Uh yeah, most probably."

"And there's a familiar scent too..." The flea sniffed. "... Sesshoumaru-sama!"

"Huh? How do you know Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin asked, frowning.

"You know where he is?"

"Uh, yeah..."

"Good! Girl, take me to him!"

"Who you think you are, ordering me around?"

"Please, girl. I have news for him."  
"He'll get visitors today and..."  
"Human girl, please. It's about the miko."  
"You know what happened to Kagome-nee-chan?"

"Yes, now please, take me to him."

"Hai."

Rin walked over to her car, carrying both, the cat and the flea. Who was he? How did he know about what had happened to Kagome-nee-chan? How did he know Sesshoumaru-sama?

The flea had crossed his four arms over his chest and there was a frown on his forehead. Who that girl was? She was clearly a human. How could she be close to Sesshoumaru-sama? And another demon? And it seemed she knew Kagome-sama as well. How?

"Shoot... I'm late..."

"What is it, girl?"

"Enough with the girl-thing. I'm Rin."

"Rin?" The flea was silent for awhile, thinking. Then he squealed. "RIN! The little girl-Rin who followed Sesshoumaru-sama around?"

"The one and only."

"How come you're still alive?"

"I'm very evil and powerful dark miko and made an elixir of life so that I'll live forever," Rin replied with a serious face.

The flea wasn't buying it.

"Oh, fine... I'm the mate of the taiyoukai of the southern lands."

"Ooh... I see. Well, I'm glad to meet you, Rin-sama. I'm Myoga."

"Nice to meet you, Myoga-sama." Rin checked the clock again. "Shoot... We'll be late." she repeated.

"What is it?"  
"Today's a taiyoukai-meeting, and we're late."

"Taiyoukai-meeting? Today? I'm lucky!"

"I guess. The others don't even know yet that Kagome-nee-chan is alive."

"Then we'll tell them. And I'll tell them what I've learned about the Inu tachi's end."

"Good. That's a story I want to hear." Rin smiled and concentrated in the driving.

* * *

The doorbell rang.

"Must be the first ones."

"But Rin is not back yet," Hitachi frowned.

"She will come," Sesshoumaru declared. "Go open the door."

Hitachi obeyed.

It was Kouga, and he was closely followed by the wolf princess Ayame, who seemed to be a bit uneasy.

Kouga had a wide grin on his face and gave Hitachi a bear hug.

Then the wolfprince turned to look at Sesshoumaru.

"Yo, it's the pizzaboy!"

He stopped. He glared. He growled.

Screw the universe, it was all over now. _Kouga_ knew. That meant _everyone_ knew. He only wondered about one thing. How the hell had the wolf found out?

His eyes started to redden as he kept on glaring daggers at Kouga. If a gaze could kill a person, Kouga would have died a thousand painful deaths during one quick beat of a heart.

Unfortunately, a gaze could not kill, even if it was the almighty cold dagger-glare of Sesshoumaru, and thus Kouga was left alive, still having the wide, slightly mocking grin on his face.


	7. Hear me now

**Chapter 6 - Hear me now**

Hojo was sorting the papers on the desk to neat piles. He sighed. His concentration on his work was being badly disturbed. Before his eyes he could see her pale face. The raven locks were framing her pale beauty, the corners of her rosy lips were curled into a smile, her brown eyes were shining gently... And a hint of insecurity and uneasiness was hidden into them. He had noticed her odd behaviour on Sunday, while having the dinner with her family. She had been unusually quiet and somewhat... he paused to think a proper word to describe it.

Distant. Yes, she had been distant in some way. She has also seemed a bit troubled and disturbed. Something was worrying her. What could it be?

Hojo frowned. She should have told someone of her worries. She should have told _him_.

Hojo decided that he would ask her about it on the date they were going to have on Friday. Their date... Hojo smiled warmly. He could barely wait for Friday. He missed his little darling, missed her so bad that his heart ached. The pain was nearly physical. But the pain did not matter, because he knew she was his. He really did look forward to their wedding. He could see it all before his eyes. Kagome moving in with him, bearing his children... She would become a great mother too, he was sure of that.

"Hojo-kun, are you already done?"

"No, sorry, I was a bit distracted."

"It's okay. But the boss wishes to have those papers in his office soon. You'd better hurry."

"Oh, right. Thanks for the advice."

"No problem," the brown-haired secretary smiled.

* * *

"I'm so sorry that I'm late! Did I miss anything?"

"Rin-chan!" Ayame squealed and rushed to hug the human woman.

"Oh God... What on Earth has happened here?" Rin could only stare at the scene that met her eyes. "Why are Hitachi and Kouga-kun rolling on the floor? And where's Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"I suppose he wanted a little time for himself to calm down. After all it would be very impolite to slaughter your fellow taiyoukais," Abi said calmly.

"Ayame?" Rin-chan asked for explanation.

"Uh... You've heard about the pizza-incident?"

"You mean it was _true_!"

"Yeah, I heard it from my e-mail-friend. She wouldn't make up such a thing."

"Who's this e-mail-friend of yours?" Rin asked, feeling curious.

"Uh.. I'll... I'll tell you later," Ayame mumbled staring at the floor, looking as though she had done something forbidden.

"Rin-san," a quiet voice came near her ear.

"Oh! Right! I'll have to tell you all something. I... Uh... Ayame-chan and Abi-san, could you please help Hitachi and Kouga-kun up from the floor and tell them to quit laughing. I'll go to look for Sesshoumaru-sama."  
Without waiting an answer Rin turned and left the room, still carrying the forgotten Kirara in her arms.

_

* * *

Screw the universe, _hethought bitterly. It was just too much to be a pure coincidence now. First, the one person he had delivered a pizza just happened to be the only one able to see through his sealing spell. Secondly, the miko only had told one of her friends. What a funny coincidence that the one of the miko's friends had happened to know the bloody wolf. And of course, Kouga had not been able to keep his overly large, annoying mouth shut. Oh no, it would have been something too good to happen, he thought bitterly.

It was so wrong. What bad had he ever done to the universe to be punished like this?

Sweet scent reached his nostrils. It was bright and light like sunbeams.

"Hello, Rin," he greeted her, not bothering to turn around. He felt a sting on the side of his neck and picked the flea up and squeezed him with his long claws.

"Myoga," he stated on his icy tone, "what are you doing here?"

Before the flea could answer, Rin spoke and calmly took the elder youkai onto her own palm.

"I brought him here. He knows what really happened to Inutachi."

"Really? Do the others know about this?"

"Not yet."

Sesshoumaru nodded and continued staring at the darkening sky.

"You shouldn't care about Hitachi and Kouga," Rin said quietly. "They still honour you. But they are just happy for this stain in your perfection, you know... You seem less superior to them now."

"Perfection?" Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow.

"You're the perfection," Rin smiled warmly.

Suddenly Sesshomaru did something unexpected. He laughed. It was a hollow laughter, one that held no joy.

"I am not perfect. No one is."  
"I think you are. And so is Kagome-nee-chan, in her own way... Although she is a tad bit emotionally unstable at the moment."

"The miko? You went to see _her_ today, when you said you were going to visit a friend of yours?"

"Yes, and I'm glad I did. For she was a horrible sight."

"Has someone hurt her?" Sesshoumaru growled suddenly.

Rin blinked.

"Uh, Sesshoumaru-sama, your eyes –"

"Is she hurt," he repeated with a louder growl.

"Not physically, but mentally – "

Sesshoumaru shook his head violently.

"Are you all right, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Yes. I'm afraid my demon self took over for a tiny while."

"Sesshoumaru-sama," the flea said, daring finally to open his mouth. He hopped to the inuyoukai's shoulder. "Isn't it already time to let the taiyoukais know about the fate of your brother's gang?"

"Half brother," he corrected icily.

Rin walked back in, following the inuyoukai and the old flea who was sitting on his shoulder.

_Curious indeed,_ she thought as she stepped in after the two demons. Why was Sesshoumaru-sama's inner demon so worried about Kagome-nee-chan's welfare?

"Dear, where did you find that neko?" Hitachi asked as he spotted Kirara.

"I found it on my way to my friend's place. She was so cute that I had to take her along."

"Give her to me," Hitachi beckoned.

Rin handed her over.

Hitachi gasped.

"No way! It's a fire-cat!"

"But those are supposed to be extinct by now," Kouga noted.

"She must have been a persistent one," Rin cooed as she petted the cat. She raised her big pleading eyes to her husband.

"Can I keep it?"

Hitachi sighed mentally. Why did she even bother to ask when she very well knew that he couldn't refuse any plea, which she gave him with that look.

"As you wish, darling."

"Yay!" Rin glomped her mate and Ayame giggled.

Abi rolled her eyes.

"Could we get into the point already," she said brushing a lock of her black hair over her shoulder. "I thought you were supposed to tell us something."

"Oh.. right... Maybe we could discuss it over the dinner? Please, this way." Rin led them to the dining room.

* * *

As they all had claimed their seats, settled down and filled their plates and glasses, Sesshoumaru cleared his throat.

"I and Rin have seen a familiar face lately. It appears that the young miko who once followed my brother, is still alive."

"Kagome?" Kouga whispered his voice all raspy.

Ayame gave her mate a side glance and shifted on her seat feeling uneasy. She felt a shiver in her back and raised her head. Her green eyes met a cold amber stare and immediately she blushed and lowered her head.

_What a pretty porcelain plate... Pretty pretty plate... _she thought hoping he would stop staring at her.

_So she knows as well_, Sesshoumaru noted.

"How could she? She's a ningen," Abi said raising her eyebrow. She lifted the glass on her lips and took a long sip.

"Lately I've been a bit bothered," Rin begun, "since the legend of the Inutachi says that none of them survived. Then how come the miko is still alive? And I'm curious. What happened to Inutachi in reality? Now, we're lucky, for we have someone here who knows the truth. And he's in this very room."

Everyone looked around.

Sesshoumaru cleared his throat. Then he pointed at a bowl of rice, which had been covered by a lid. On the lid was standing a tiny figure.

"This is Myoga. He was once one of my father's advisors."

The youkai gathered around the table and stared at him in disbelief. Myoga acted as if he had not noticed and started to tell his tale.

"I arrived to Edo only a few days after I heard about Naraku's death. There I went to see the miko Kaede who is actually the little sister of the miko Kikyo, the priestess who originally was the protector of the Shikon no Tama. And Kaede-sama told me everything.

On that day several mikos had gathered into the village, in order to keep council. Kaede does not know the details of what happened in the battle. But she told me that Kagome-sama came, running, and arrived to her hut, clutching the Shikon no Tama in her palm. She then completed the jewel and thus it returned to where it had come from."

"What do you mean? It's still under the miko's possession," Sesshoumaru stated.

"Indeed. The jewel is _inside _her."

"What? How?" Ayame dropped her chopsticks. "Uh, sorry..."

"It's okay," Rin insured smiling.

"Kagome is the reincarnation of the miko Kikyo. The Shikon no Tama was destroyed as Kikyo's remains were burned. But Kikyo was reborn as Kagome-sama. Still bearing the Shikon jewel. When Kagome-sama jumped through the well..."

"Huh? What's a well got to do with this?" Ayame interrupted again.

Myoga stared at the red-headed ookami for awhile. Then he started to laugh.

Ayame shot her mate with a puzzled look. Kouga answered her with a shrug.

_It seems that the flea has lived a little too long_, Kouga thought. _His brains have obviously started to soften a bit. _

Myoga eventually stopped laughing, as he realized no one else found the situation funny. He frowned.

"Oh that's right. None of you know!" he realized then.

"Please go on and explain," Sesshoumaru said interrupting the elder youkai's thoughts.

"You might have notice that Kagome-sama was a little... Eccentric. Those clothes of hers and so on... Well, it's all easily explained. You see, Kagome-sama was not from that time. She has never lived 500 years. This time we live right now, this is her time. She was born about twenty years ago."

"But then... How come she met Inuyasha 500 years ago?" Rin asked, frowning.

"That's why it has everything to do with the well. You see, Kagome-sama's home is an ancient shrine. In one of the ancillary buildings there, is an old well. The Bone-eaters well, to be exact. One day Kagome-sama fell into that well and for a reason I do not know, a time-portal appeared."

"Well doesn't that explain a lot," Hitachi reckoned.

"Could we already get back into what happened to inu-tachi?" Abi snarled. She really couldn't care less about the miko.

"Oh yes... Where was I? Ahh... So, when Shikon no Tama had been absorbed back into Kagome-sama's body, Kaede-sama sent a miko to see what had happened in the battle. It appeared that the monk, the taijiya, the kitsune-pup... All of them were dead. Inuyasha and Naraku were nowhere in sight. So Kaede had assumed that the whole Inutachi, save for Kagome-sama of course, had met their end in the battle against the hanyou Naraku. The loss of all her companions was too great for Kagome-sama to handle. Her heart was shattered. Kaede-sama told me that Kagome-sama did not spill a single tear. That she appeared broken and empty and that the loss had touched her deeply. The mikos decided to do what they saw the best. They sealed Kagome-sama's memories and made her return her own time. The portal closed after her, as she took the Shikon no Tama with her."

"And Inuyasha?" Kouga asked.

"Inuyasha-sama arrived to Kaede-sama's hut about half an hour after Kagome-sama had been sent home. He had won the fight, but it had cost him all his companions. After he had heard what had happened to the woman he had loved...

A word reached Kaede-sama's ears a few days later that Inuyasha-sama had committed a Seppuku."

The group finished their dinner in silence. Everyone was thinking about the gruesome end of Inutachi.

* * *

"Her memories were sealed..." Ayame said her thoughts aloud on a quiet tone, as they were once again in the living room of Sesshoumaru-sama.

"Yes. Several mikos helped Kaede-sama in the task," Myoga told.

"And yet the seal lets some of her memories slip through."

As heads turned to look at her she blushed and her hands flew to cover her mouth.

Sesshoumaru made a little calculation in his head. E-mail friend. Living in Hokkaido. In _northern lands_. A person who most likely knew Kouga and tell him.

"You're the e-mail friend," Sesshoumaru said out loud.

"What is he talking about?" Kouga asked, watching closely his mate and the icy inuyoukai.

"I... I met Kagome-chan a few years ago. We've been e-mailing ever since."

"You knew Kagome was alive and you didn't tell me!" Kouga exclaimed his voice rising a bit.

Ayame turned her big green pleading eyes to her mate.

"Please Kouga... I didn't want to let you know. I.. I mean, I knew eventually it would come out, but... You... You loved her, and I... I..."

Hitachi laughed softly.

"You're acting a little silly, Ayame-chan. Do you really think Kouga-kun would leave you because of a miko he loved 500 years ago? After all those centuries he has spent with you? Especially when you are carrying his pup?"

Ayame's blush deepened.

Kouga blinked.

"My.. My _what_?"

"Way to go, Hitachi," Rin said rolling her eyes. "You just had to go and blurt it all out like that."

"I thought she had already told him... Or that he had smelled it."

"Is this true, Ayame?" Kouga asked watching her intensively.

"Yes.. I'm waiting for your pup," she said on a faint whisper.

A wide smile slowly lit up his face. He cupped her face and placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Congratulations, Ayame-chan," Rin smiled.

"That's your fifth one," Hitachi pointed out. "Aren't you getting a little tired already?"

"As happy as I am for you, Ayame-san, I still think you should have told us about the miko." Abi said.

Kouga frowned and turned to look at his wife.

"You said the seal is letting some of her memories to slip into her mind?"

"Yes... She told me that she has been seeing weird dreams lately. About a red-clad, dog-eared boy. She's seen the others as well. It's making her feel very confused. She refuses to believe in the dreams, she does not recognise them. She doesn't realise that in truth they're her faded memories... But she really freaked out when she woke up to see Sesshoumaru-sama before her eyes. After just having seen a dream of him."

Sesshoumaru flinched again. The miko had dreamed of him? The miko had subconsciously remembered him?

_Are you starting to understand why __I want her_, his inner demon inquired.

_She's a pitiful human_, Sesshoumaru replied coldly.

_Ah_, his demon self said.

Sesshoumaru could feel that the demon was smiling. He mentally kicked his other self.

"Her subconscious mind works as she sleeps. She sees some random mental images that are really actually some pieces of her faded memories," Myoga concluded.

"And now, she's a total mess," Rin said, sighing. She had been in the kitchen, giving some food for the little demon cat.

"You mean the confusion?" Ayame said worryingly.

Rin nodded.

"You should have only seen her today..."

"I have to see her," Ayame said hurriedly as she got up.

"Don't you think it's a rather late hour, darling," Kouga said pointing at the clock on the wall. It was a quarter past eleven.

"Okay, I'll go to see her tomorrow, then," Ayame said.

"Can I come with you?" Kouga asked.

"No, I would rather meet her on my own."

"But I want to see her too."

"You'll get your chance to meet her. Eventually."

Abi cleared her throat.

"I must point out that I feel quite tired. I guess there are no more matters that we should discuss?"

"No, I guess the meeting is over for today," Sesshoumaru replied.

"Good." Abi got up.

"Umm... If it just is okay, could we stay over at your place?" Ayame asked turning to look at Rin.

"No, it's fine, really."

"Good... Shall we go?"

"What about you, Abi-san? Are you staying here?" Rin asked.

"No... I've reserved a hotel room. No offence, Sesshoumaru."

"Do as you please," the demon lord replied.

"I'd just want to ask one thing before I go. You see, I can't help but to wonder... Why were you delivering that pizza, Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru flinched. It was a small flinch that barely caught the sharp eyes of the taiyoukais.

He had known the damned wolf was foolish and a loudmouth, but had he honestly even told _Abi_ about it?

"I was bored," he barked out coldly and turned on his heels, marching away from the entrance hall.

"Here he goes again," Hitachi said rolling his eyes.

"So impolite. He should have at least bid us farewell," Kouga said.

"Leave it be, dear," Ayame scolded quietly.

"You know... I think I understand his reasons."

"No wonder Rin-chan. You're the only one who can see at least a little through that icy facade," Kouga pointed.

"Sesshoumaru-sama is not a person who likes to work in an office from eight to six. The past still haunts him. I think he still has a soul of the vagabond. He needs to do something else than pile papers up neatly. You know what kind of person he is... His nature's far too restless to be bound to the same place for too long. He needs something to do, something to entertain him... And maybe he thought he would try out something different, and therefore ended up delivering pizza. It was his bad luck that he happened to deliver that pizza to the only person who is able to see through his sealing spell..."

"The miko is able to see through _Sesshoumaru's_ sealing-spell?" Hitachi blinked.

"The Shikon jewel," Myoga said, nodding.

Rin replied with a short nod.

Sesshoumaru was sitting on his sofa. That damned wolf just had to be so annoying! And so unable to keep his overly big and useless mouth shut.

It was funny though. He was the host of the taiyoukai-meeting and yet, in the end, he was left alone. Myoga had disappeared, and the taiyoukais with their mates had left his house. Was he that unpleasant company? Well, it was not like he wanted their company anyway...

A mewling sound caught his delicate ears and then he found out that the little fire-cat was curled up in his lap, both of her tails wrapped around her body. Soft and steady purring seemed - oddly enough – to ease his mind. Sesshoumaru started to stroke her fur gently. He wouldn't mind this kind of quiet, peaceful company. A company that minded its own business, didn't laugh at him even if he was delivering pizzas to time-travelling mikos... Yes, maybe cats weren't that bad after all.

* * *

"Shoot! What's wrong with me today," Rin wailed she stepped in.

"What is it, dear?" Hitachi asked as he switched the lights on.

"The fire-cat Kirara! I fed her and left her into Sesshoumaru-sama's kitchen!"

"In that case, you'd better hope that the kitty's still alive tomorrow," Kouga chuckled.

Rin sighed.

"Woah! Amazing!"

Rin glanced to see what Ayame was talking about.

"Oh. That. Sesshoumaru-sama painted it."

"No way... Why?"

"He said the image did not give him peace before he'd transfer it to the canvas."

Ayame leaned closer.

The painting was amazing. Kagome was clearly the heart of the painting. She was positioned in the middle, wearing a happy expression on her care-free face. One could almost feel the warmth and joy she seemed to be radiating. The kitsune pup was perched on her shoulder, looking sweet and young and innocent. The taijiya was on her left, holding the fire-cat in her arms. She was smiling, but a hint of sorrow was showing in her eyes. Behind her was standing the monk, grinning. His hand was resting on the shoulder of the youkai exterminator. Inuyasha, looking the same as always, was standing on the right side of Kagome. His dog-ears and red clothes were so _him..._ She felt a sad sting as she remembered what had happened to them all. Kitsune pup, dead and buried. Taijiya and the monk, dead as well. Inuyasha, who had ended up taking his own life. And Kagome-chan, who had lost her memory, and was now feeling only confusion and pain...

Why had the fate been so harsh to them? What had they ever done to earn it?

"He gave this to you?"

"Yes... He told me that it didn't belong to him. But I don't think it belongs to me either."

Ayame looked at her old friend.

"You are going to give this to Kagome-chan?"

"Yes... I think that it belongs to Kagome-nee-chan."

Ayame nodded.

"True."

"Come, I'll show you two your room," Rin said, gesturing Kouga to follow too. "You better go to sleep, it's quite late already."

Kouga smiled.

"I appreciate your advice."

* * *

"_What the heck are you doing here with that pizza?"_

"_How does it look like? I'm delivering it to you."_

"_Oh you are? Hahahaha. Why would you be - " She swallowed rest of her words. He had a weird expression on his face. An expression that scared the hell out of her._

_And then, not even in a blink of an eye the silver-haired man was standing right before her. She had no time to wonder how he was able to move__ that fast, for his amber eyes had even weirder look in them. Kagome gulped again. Suddenly her mouth seemed to have gone all dry. Her eyes widened._

_The kiss was sudden and it was far from being sweet__ or tender or soft. It was a hungry and demanding one. And she gave in willingly, she let him explore every inch of her mouth. He made shivers run down her spine and she snuggled closer to his body. She stroked his broad chest gently, sliding her hands over it all the way to his back, until her arms were wrapped around him and she was pressed against him. He allowed his hands to freely roam all over her slender body. _

_Neither of the__m cared about the pizza anymore. It had been dropped onto the floor and lay there, abandoned and forgotten._

_She shivered with delight as his hands moved over her breasts. And then his hands stopped._

_He lifted her up__ easily. She wrapped her legs around his mid-body as he supported her securely, cupping her behind. She_ _moaned softy when he started kissing her neck. _

_He started to walk towards her bedroom, as he once again claimed her lips and the kisses only grew hungrier and more demanding..._

Kagome jerked awake. She was still shaking, sweat dripping slowly down her temples. Just what the hell had that been? And WHY?

_Girl, you've finally lost it_, she swore to herself as the panic whirled restlessly inside her.

* * *

On the other side of the city, Sesshoumaru's growl was muffled by the fluffy pillow that he was roughly pushing against his face.

_Why_, he wanted to know, _just why I just experienced such a dream about that damn miko_?


	8. Breaking the habit

**Disclaimer:** I still do not own Inuyasha's characters, and I'm not making any profit by writing this… Chapter title is stolen from Linkin Park.

**Chie:** Don't be too confused. This is the right fic you are reading. And even the right chapter. :P It's just written backwards, please pay attention to the timeline ;x Sorry if it hard to make out, I just started to try out something different.

Chapter seven - Breaking the habit

**Saturday, 05.26 AM**

Kagome was awake though she stubbornly still kept her eyes closed. Instinctively she knew that it was not yet time to rise. Besides, she was feeling way too comfortable to get up. She was feeling warm and secure and his steady heartbeat soothed her tired mind.

_... Wait, what heartbeat?!_

Kagome's eyes shot swiftly open. And then she remembered it all.

All that had happened last night.

Kagome's eyes widened and her face paled. No. Oh no! What had she done? Where the hell had her brains been last night? Just why had she let him do that?

Kagome got up and amazingly enough she was able to creep from the bedroom without waking him up.

As she picked up the pieces of her clothing that had been scattered all around the floor of his apartment, she scolded herself. Just why... Why had she let him to.. She couldn't even make herself to finish the sentence.

She was trembling as she hastily dressed herself. Now what? How was she going to get back home? After all she had taken a taxi...

_Don't bother to think about it now, it does not matter_, she stated to herself. _Now I only have to get out of here._

Kagome crept out of the silent house and vanished into the night.

**

* * *

Saturday, 00.13 AM**

Kagome yelped as he let his hold of her go. For her surprise she fell on his soft bed. Funny. She had not noticed he had been moving at all after he had picked her up into his arms. What was it about him that made her feel this way? This hunger, this desire... Hojo never made her feel like this. This strongly...

And that was the last time when she thought about her fiancé that night. Very soon the only one she could think about was Sesshoumaru. His silver hair glowed slightly in the darkness of the room. She knew now for sure that he was a not human. What he was exactly, she did not know. But those fangs that brushed gently her skin, those claws that were currently tangled in her hair, those red eyes which were watching her couldn't belong to a human being. The little voice of reason in her mind, the same annoying one that constantly kept on reminding her that she already was engaged with someone else, told her that she should be scared of him. That she should run.

But Kagome did not listen. She knew he wouldn't do her any harm. He wouldn't do to her anything that she did not want him to do. Not tonight.

They both were already stripped out of all their clothes, those had been totally useless and only in the way of their hungry passion. The clothes had been scattered all across his living room floor. And now they were in his bedroom, sitting on his bed, their lips locked in a fierce kiss. His tongue was invading her mouth, tasting her sweet soft cavern. His hands were travelling all around her firm young body as she was sitting in his lap, facing him with both her legs and arms wrapped around his body. The feel of his skin on hers, his tight embrace, his passionate kissing... All of those sensations he was causing to her were awakening something strong in her, something ancient and all consuming. She shivered, moaned and whimpered in her need. Her body seemed to be on fire but Sesshoumaru's skin remained as cool and calm as ice. Yet his eyes were burning as hot as the lustful fire he had awakened inside Kagome and his kisses were scorching her.

His lips had moved away from hers and now they were tracing her jawline, moving on to place hot open-mouthed kisses onto the soft skin on the side of her neck. His fangs brushed against her skin and for a short moment she thought that he could tear her throat open with those fangs. But she knew that he wouldn't do that to her. And soon she forgot about that thought altogether as he moved on from her neck to place kisses all over her shoulders.

Kagome gave out a whimper of surprise when his skilful tongue suddenly brushed against her left nipple - the whimpering soon turning into moans of pleasure. He gently rubbed her left breast as he licked her nipple once more before starting suckling on it. Kagome's moans grew louder. She moved her hands on his skin, wanting to feel more of him, needing him. He was teasing her, she was able to tell. He was ready for her, it was obvious and distracting her badly for she felt him pressed hard against her when she wanted him to be inside her... Yes she was definitely ready for him too.

He pulled away from her. She let out a muffled, opposing sound and opened her eyes. He was staring at her, his crimson eyes glowing in the dark of the room. He pressed her down on her back. Then he bent down to kiss both of her sweet soft mounds once more before he continued his way, heading down. Kagome moaned at the feeling of his tongue tracing her skin. He stopped as he reached her navel and circled it a few times. Then he travelled further with his tongue, heading lower and lower...

Until he reached his goal.

Sesshoumaru knew she was ready for him, he felt it, heard it and smelled it. This woman was his. He really wanted to mark her as his own at this very moment but he knew he couldn't. Not when his rational self still was fighting against his wishes and desires. Not when he did not know if she was willing to give herself to him. Oh, he knew she was willing to give him her body but that was not enough for him. He wanted her love, he wanted her soul. He wanted her as his mate and eventually he would have her. But just now this was enough.

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes as he heard her hoarse moans and whimpers.

**

* * *

Friday, 11.56 PM**

Kagome paid the taxi driver.

"Now come on," she groaned, helping the utterly drunk man into his own house. She took off his jacket and shoes and left them in the entrance-hall.

Rustling sound caught her ears and she turned around to see a small cat. A Two-tailed, red eyed little cat with a fur the colour of cream.

_Huh? That's the kitty from my dream..._

"I didn't know you're a cat person," Kagome stated simply.

The man still refused to answer her. Kagome sighed.

"Now come on..." she helped him leading him onto the large soft sofa he had in his living room. She groaned as she left him sink to the sofa. He was just too damn heavy.

"A friendly advice. In the future, don't let yourself get this wasted."

He was still ignoring her.

"Well, I guess you'll be fine by yourself from now on. Good bye." Kagome turned around and started walking out. An Instant later she was pulled back.

"Would you please let go of my arm," she snapped.

"No. I want you to stay."

"What!?" Kagome turned around. He was staring at her an odd look in his eyes. Eyes that shone... Kagome blinked.

"Ehh, Hisakata-sama... Why did your eyes turn red?"

He chuckled as he tugged her arm.

She "eeped" as she lost her balance and fell into his waiting arms. She did not have time to catch her breath because the moment she raised her head to give him a glare, she found his lips pressed against her own.

"Please stay with me," he whispered into her ear after the fierce kiss.

Kagome felt dizzy. She couldn't possibly stay over at his place for the night. This was not right, this was outrageous! Who was he to treat her like a piece of garbage and then suddenly just kiss her and ask her to stay? Goddammit, she was engaged and –

And his soft lips were tracing sweet kisses on the side of her neck and it felt heavenly... As he cupped her face with his large hand, once again claiming her lips, all thoughts of Hojo or leaving suddenly vanished completely from her mind. And then she let herself go with the feeling and answered his kiss.

**

* * *

Friday, 11.30 PM**

"Exactly what are you planning to do with that piece of information?" she inquired, clearly amused.

"Never mind that, Rin-chan, just tell me the friggin' address," Kagome pleaded.

"Alright, Alright...."

Rin hung up. She giggled.

"Who was it?" Hitachi asked curiously.

"It was Kagome-nee-chan... She sounded pretty pissed off." Rin was still giggling.

Hitachi quirked his eyebrow.

"What's so amusing?"

"She called to me because she wanted to know what's Sesshoumaru-sama's home address."

"She what? Just why does the miko want his address?"

"I don't know... But I sure would want to know. Especially on such a late hour... What if..."

"No way, Rin. You know him. His damn pride would never let him to do that."

"I know. How boring."

**

* * *

Friday, 10.02 PM**

She really wasn't a drinker. Honestly. But the whole week had just been too damn crappy to stay sober. A great end to a great week! She desperately wanted to forget about everything for a moment.

Kagome walked down the streets, heading towards a bar which she had once visited with Yuka and Eri.

It had all been so horrible. First days she had spent at home after Shaere had told her to go home. Then, suddenly Rin-chan had come to visit her. Well, Kagome had been even more surprised as Ayame-chan suddenly came to visit her too. Just what the heck had she been doing in Tokyo anyway? And she had shortly met her husband Kouga-kun too...

But the date with Hojo, that had been the worst. The final blow that broke her completely. She needed to forget it all, just for awhile... and why had he suddenly kissed her like that?

A little voice of reason nagged that it really wasn't so strange behaviour, after all, they were engaged. Kagome huffed and threw reason into a trash can.

She finally reached the bar, stepped in and walked up to the counter to order her drink.

When there were two empty glasses on the counter in front of her, she decided that it would be enough for this night. Even though she still remembered everything, she wanted to at least remember how to get back home.

"One more," a rough growl demanded from the other side of the little bar.

"Sir, I think you've had enough already," the bartender replied calmly.

"I said that I want one more. And I want it now," the angry man stood up though the impression was ruined because of a bit staggering.

Kagome turned her head.

_What the hell?_

It was Hisakata-san, completely drunk.

_That's it, I'm leaving._

Kagome got up and paid for her drinks. She grabbed her purse and walked over to the door.

On the door she stopped.

She couldn't leave him there. Not in that condition.

_Damn conscience_, she complained.

Kagome walked over to him.

"I think it would be time for you to go home."

He turned to look at her.

"Stay away from me, miko," he growled.

_Miko? Right, he seriously is drunk..._

"Shut up, I'm trying to help you."

"This Sesshoumaru needs help from nobody," he replied arrogantly.

"Oh yeah?" Kagome said sarcastically as he staggered again. Not fearing any of the possible consequences she grabbed his arm and started to walk him out of the bar.

He growled at her but she didn't mind.

"Eh, miss?"

"Yes?"

"His bill."

Kagome looked at the piece of paper the bartender was holding. She blinked. How on Earth could someone drink that much?!

"Boy aren't you a pain in the ass," she hissed as she threw money to the bartender.

The extremely happy couple made their way along the streets. Kagome was muttering curses under her breath and he was growling at her.

"Great, a taxi."

Kagome waved the car over at them.

"What's your address?"

The man refused to answer.

"Be it that way then," snarled as she took out her mobile phone. She would have to call Rin-chan.

**

* * *

Friday, 07.00 PM**

After the incident with the taxi-driver Hojo escorted Kagome inside.

"I'm so happy to see you again," he told her.

"So am I to see you," Kagome lied with a fake smile on her face.

"You look beautiful."

_If he only knew how much time I spent putting on this thick mask of make up... If he only knew how horrible my life has been this whole week..._

"I made dinner for us."

"Oh, you did? That's so sweet! You shouldn't have..."

"Ohh, please, it's nothing big. Just a little something to take away the hunger."

Kagome forced out another smile and sat down at the table.

Even though she had not eaten properly the whole day - actually not for several days, she still was not hungry. Despite that, she filled her plate with food and then started to eat.

"How have you been, sweetie?"

"Oh my week has been just great," Kagome said smiling.

_Yeah right. My week's been just pain.... And it sure isn't getting any better._

Kagome banished the sarcastic thoughts from her mind. She should keep up the facade.

For the rest of the dinner she listened to him as he went on and on about how full of work his whole week had been and how badly he had missed her. She felt a small sting of guilt. She hadn't missed him at all. It was more like the other way around.

"Thank you, it was delicious," she complimented as she had finished her meal.

Hojo gestured her to rise and follow him. They settled down in his living-room, where they started to watch a movie, which he had rented. The film had reached its halfway when Hojo suddenly bent down and kissed her. Kagome stiffened but Hojo didn't seem to pay heed to that, for he deepened the kiss. Kagome trembled. She broke the kiss and pulled away from him.

"No, Hojo..."

"You don't have to be afraid, Kagome... I love you." He flashed her a sweet and gentle smile and then closed their distance again kissing her lips.

Kagome backed away from him as much as she could on the small sofa.

"No, please don't."

"What's wrong, sweetie?"

"I... I don't want to, not today, please."

Hojo let her go. Kagome got up.

For awhile they stared at each other, Hojo looking sad and hurt, Kagome looking distant and pained.

"I have to leave," she said quietly.

Hojo could only watch when she walked away from him and closed the door of his apartment after her, setting a wall between them.

**

* * *

Friday, again 07.00 PM**

That was it. That had been the last trick. He had had enough.

Something was disturbing him, something that was not quite right. He had let his self control slip way too often lately.

And what had that been just a moment ago anyway?

He did not care about the damn miko! Just why should he? Just why had he got that upset for seeing her boyfriend kissing her? Why couldn't his inner demon see how foolish its behaviour was? But of course he was just a savage beast. He wouldn't understand why the idea of the miko as his mate was simply absurd. Sesshoumaru would never lower himself to taking a human as a mate.

He decided to go and drink something. He had earned that, for sure.

The taiyoukai meeting had been a pure hell. The word had spread causing all the others to laugh at him. Hitachi and that foolish wolf had even been rolling on the floor.

So much for his reputation...

Sesshoumaru still regretted not killing those two annoyances. But he couldn't do anything to Hitachi because he simply could not stand watching Rin suffer. And regarding Koga, it would have been just awfully impolite. Well, it wouldn't matter tonight.

This night he'd drink it all away.

**

* * *

Friday, 06.24 PM**

Kagome watched his blank expression from the rear view mirror. Just her typical luck. It was Friday now and she was sitting in a cab on her way over to Hojo's.

How come she had again ended up running into _him_? Just what were the odds anyway? Out of all the damn cabs in Tokyo how had she ended up choosing the one _he_ was driving?

... And why in kami's name was he driving it anyway?

_I just can't believe this..._

Luckily it wasn't a long ride.

Hojo waved, he was already waiting for her outside his apartment.

Kagome got out of the car and walked up to him. Her fiancé greeted her with a kiss.

She couldn't really tell what happened then. One moment she was kissing Hojo, the next she was swept away. Feeling utterly puzzled she turned her head to look around.

What met her eyes was even a greater surprise.

Hojo was lifted up from the ground and pinned against the brick wall by a pale strong arm. Sesshoumaru's long clawed fingers were wrapped around his throat. For awhile Kagome could swear his eyes flashed with a reddish tint but then they were back to normal amber again. The silver-haired man blinked.

As suddenly as he had attacked, he let his grip go. He turned on his heels and strode back to his car. He got in and drove away.

Hojo was panting on the ground, covering his sore throat with his hand.

"Just what the hell was that about?"

Kagome couldn't answer his question.

**

* * *

Friday, 05.12 PM**

"Thank you so much dear for watching your younger siblings as we were gone," Ayame said smiling to her eldest child.

"It was nothing mom. You really should thank my employer because it was she who let me go. You know, other workers have been off lately on a sick leave."

"Well, when you get back to work you should thank her for me too."

"Sure."

"Were the little ones much of trouble?"

"No, the twins were rather wild but every pup is like that in their age," the young wolf youkai smiled. "Anyway, how was your meeting?"

"Very interesting indeed... You've heard the legend of Inutachi?"

"Yeah."

"It appears that the miko was a time traveller. She's still alive. About your age, in human years, of course."

"I see..."

"And then your dad nearly got himself killed," Ayame added.

"What? What did he do this time?"

"It appears that Sesshoumaru-sama in all his boredom was delivering a pizza."

"He what?" the young wolf giggled.

"Yeah, it's funny... But you should have just seen the face of the taiyoukai as your dad was rolling on the floor, laughing... I think that his sense of manners and honour were the only things that kept your father alive," Ayame rolled her eyes. "But that aside, there's something I want to tell you."

"What is it, mom?"

"You're going to have a new younger sibling."

The young wolf squealed happily and hugged her mother.  
"That's so great, I'm happy for you!"

Ayame smiled as she watched her young blond-haired daughter with pride.

**

* * *

Wednesday, 09.30 AM**

"Where are you going, dear?"

"I'm going to see Sesshoumaru-sama. Don't you remember that I forgot the kitty at his place? I'm going to save her and get her back... Or at least get back her remains."

Hitachi chuckled.

"I seriously hope she's all right. Fire cats were rare even back then not to mention nowadays."

"Rare or not, she was so cute! I want her."

"One kitty isn't enough to you?" Kouga asked from the kitchen, grinning.

Rin turned to grimace at the wolf taiyoukai who was currently having his breakfast.

"Oh, shush, Kouga-kun.... Umm... Where did Ayame-chan go this early?"

"She went to see Kagome. You know, we'll probably soon head back to home. Ka-chan is there alone looking after her younger siblings."

"I'd say you better hurry in that case," Rin grinned. "Anyway, I'm going now. Bye!"

After the short drive she parked her car in his yard and walked in. She did not bother to ring the doorbell for she knew that Sesshoumaru-sama wouldn't mind.

She was prepared to see blood. She was prepared to see cats entrails spilled all over his house. She was ready to see everything if it just included the cat being already dead... But, she was not prepared to see that the cat was healthy and alive. And happy. And drowsing. And being curled up in Sesshoumaru's lap. Purring. What scared her the most was the fact that he didn't seem to mind it at all. He was also half asleep, his eyes closed, his pale hand lazily petting her soft fur.

And he was also purring.

Rin couldn't believe her ears. Inutaiyoukai? Purring? She shook her head.

It was a shame, really, she had really wanted that kitty to herself... Maybe she just should be happy with the one kitty she already had back at home, waiting for her. Sesshoumaru was a loner, better if the fire cat stayed with him. They seemed to get along pretty well anyway.

**

* * *

Wednesday, 09.00 AM**

"What are you doing here?" one very bewildered young woman asked as she was being hugged by her red-haired friend.

"What a silly question is that, Kagome-chan? I came to see you of course!"

"But Ayame-chan, uhh.. Nevermind, come in, come in!"

"It's just you haven't sounded too happy lately. I got a bit worried for you."

"But what about your kids and Kouga-kun?"

"My eldest daughter is watching after the kids and Kouga is with me. We had to visit Tokyo anyway."

"Oh, then I understand." Kagome smiled, although her smile wasn't too cheery. "Please, sit down. Would you want something? A cup of tea maybe?"

"I just ate breakfast but I guess I still have room for one cup of tea," Ayame smiled.

Kagome vanished into the kitchen and after a while walked back into her living room and settled down on the sofa, next to her mail-friend and turned so that she was facing her.

"So. What's going on?"

"A total chaos and confusion," Kagome answered with a sigh.

"Is it really that bad?"

"Yeah, my boss sent me home yesterday from work and told me to have a few days off."

"You poor thing," Ayame said with a compassionate expression on her face.

The wolf princess hugged the miko tight.

"You shouldn't let this all have such a toll on you, you know. Your friends will start to worry about you. And in your case that means a lot of people. And you had better to remember that, too."


	9. Good morning sunshine

**Disclaimer: **These characters are from the manga/anime Inuyasha, and they belong to Rumiko Takahashi, I get no money for writing this. Chapter title is from Aqua's song

**Chie:** No taiyoukais were harmed while writing this fic.

**Chapter 8 - Good morning sunshine**

He was partly awake. He didn't want to let go of the sweet sleep, for he could sense that in the distance, his head was throbbing with pain. He still wanted to linger a few more minutes in this sweet world between the sleep and awakening, especially when this sweet scent, calming scent was nicely wrapped all around him. A slightly familiar scent. A scent that belonged to a human female. The miko's scent.

Sesshoumaru's eyes shot open. Instantly he felt a throbbing headache. Yes. He had gone drinking last night. He remembered being in a bar and ordering a new drink... But he had no idea how he had managed to get back home.

But that wasn't the most disturbing question. The most disturbing question was that why the hell was his whole bedroom full of the miko's scent? Why was her scent all over _him_?

And that scent wasn't exactly normal either. It had a certain edge to it, a certain hint of...

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened in recognition.

A certain hint of a female in heat.

Just _what_ had he done last night? It couldn't be that he... that she... that they...

_Good morning!_ his inner demon wished brightly.

Sesshoumaru growled aloud.

_YOU! This is all your doing!_

_My my, aren't you grumpy this morning..._

Sesshoumaru couldn't believe this. He had happily gone to drink, in order to forget everything for one night... And what had his inner demon done? He had taken over the control and mated a human miko! The same wench that once had been following his cursed half-brother! It had been centuries since he had last been so furious as he was now. It was a disgusting thought. Even touching his late brother's wench was vile, yet alone mating her...!

_Who are you to make decisions for me! _Sesshoumaru grumbled, mentally strangling his inner demon.

_And who are you to make decisions for me? _his demonself replied his question with a question. _After all, I have already told you this: She is my mate-to-be._

_The hell she is! _Sesshoumaru snarled.

_When have I really given you the permission to make decisions for me? I want her._

_But I do _not

_I honestly can't understand why you are fighting against me in this matter. It was very enjoyable. _

_I did not allow you to..._

_Actually, you did. _His demonself calmly replied. _You were so drunk that you gladly let me take control._

I'm _never_ drinking again, Sesshoumaru decided with a furious huff. What a start to a day! He had mated a _human_. Due to his drinking last night he had a devilish headache. And now he was tired as hell - and pissed off to no end.

He wanted to kill something... Maybe he would start off from the miko. She was the one to be blamed. She was the cause to this all. She was the cause to his infamy. It was all _her _fault. With her gone, the problem would be solved. No one would ever find out what they had done...

The more he thought over it, the more he liked the idea.

Only there were a few problems. Would his inner demon allow him to hurt his chosen mate? Not likely. And if what the flea had said was true, the miko was carrying the Shikon no tama inside her. What would happen to the jewel if its protector would die? How would the other taiyoukais react to the news of him killing the miko, without any clear reason? Rin was really attached to the miko, and Hitachi would without a doubt take his mate's site. Kouga and Ayame both were fond of the human as well, so in the 'ideal' situation killing her could very well start a taiyoukai war.

Damned. There were too many reasons why not to kill the miko.

Maybe he'd just go and kill someone else.

_Calmed down a bit, are we?_

_Go away_, Sesshoumaru snapped.

His inner demon just laughed.

_Not that I would care... But how did you manage to get her here?_

_You can't remember? She came willingly._

_What!_

_Yes, she wanted to help you. You know, in that condition it had been a miracle if you had found your way back home by yourself. So she brought you back here._

_She wanted to help me?_ Sesshoumaru couldn't believe that. Why should she have wanted to help him?

_Yes._

_Why?_

_I honestly do not know, _his demonself replied.

Sesshoumaru frowned.

"Mew."

It was then when he paid attention to the little cat, who was happily curled up on his pillow. On his pillow that reeked of the miko.

"Not you too," Sesshoumaru snarled and walked out of his bedroom, searching for his lost clothes.

* * *

"Good morning, Sesshoumaru-sama," her monotonous voice greeted.

"Good morning, Kanna."

He made room in the doorway so that the young pale demoness could step in.

After they had been sitting in silence in his living room for some time, she opened her mouth again.

"I see."

Sesshoumaru didn't answer.

"Was last night pleasant to you?"

"Not exactly. It was my demon self who was in control."

"Ah."

Silence occurred once more.

"She was a human," Kanna observed.

"I wasn't myself then," Sesshoumaru reminded stiffly.

"Hmmm."

After few more minutes spent in total silence, Sesshoumaru suddenly couldn't keep it inside anymore.

"He wants her to be my mate," he blurted suddenly out.

"Oh?"

"I don't need such a useless thing as a mate. It would only be in my way."

"Would it?" the young demoness said, a questioning gaze in her usually emotion-free eyes.

* * *

"Today will be the day," she declared passionately

Kanna's expression remained as blank as ever

"Today Sesshy-darling will finally confess his true feelings for me," Kagura cooed.

"I doubt that."

"Why wouldn't he? It's obvious! Even if he insists saying that he never wants to see me again, it's clearly really just because he's afraid of me."

"Afraid?"

"Yes. He must be confused by all the feelings I awake in him."

"You think he's all head over heels for you?"

"Obviously!"

"Then why did he mate Inuyasha's miko last night?"

Kagura froze.

"What!" she hissed, her red eyes glowing full of rage.

* * *

"You still don't look you'd be all right," Kayade observed.

"I... I had a rough night," Kagome replied.

_Yeah, rough night cheating on your fiancé and sleeping with an emotionless bastard. Way to go, Kagome!_

"Oh?" Mischievous grin appeared on Kayade´s face. "Rough night with whom?"

"Kayade!" Kagome squealed, blushing brightly.

"Ah-ha!"

_I thought I sensed something was different with her, _Kayade noted in her mind.

"So... You finally slept with Hojo?" Kayade asked innocently.

The little bell rang.

Both girls turned their heads to see a customer who had just walked in.

_I'm saved! _Kagome triumphed.

"You little whore!" The black haired, red-eyed woman screamed.

Kayade and Kagome blinked. What the - ?

The furious, elegantly dressed woman walked over to Kagome, her high heels clicking on the wooden floor.

"I'm gonna send you to deepest hell. You've done your dirty trick seducing _my _Sesshy!" She stopped to inhale sharply. Her eyes narrowed.

"I'm going to kill you!"

Kagome blinked.

The life in the little restaurant had suddenly stopped. All the customers were gawking at the scene. Kagome and Kayade were standing rooted to their spots as the black-haired woman reached inside her design jacket with her hand.

She was... going to pull out a gun?

_She is really going to kill me? _Kagome gulped.

With a triumphant grin she pulled out something white. A fan.

_Huh? _Kagome blinked.

Kayade then made her move. The blond girl took a step towards the psychotic lady and grabbed her arm into a firm grip.

"Now now, you need clearly some fresh air. Please, follow me."

Then Kayade dragged the tricky customer after her out of the little restaurant.

Kagome turned to look at the remaining customers.

"I'm terribly sorry you had to experience that," she apologized with a bow. "My second cousin. It appears she forgot to take her meds."

* * *

"Take your filthy hands off me!" she shrieked.

Kayade smirked.

They were standing on the backyard of the restaurant, on a little asphalt field where no one could see them.

"As you wish, wind witch. You really have to be out of your damned mind! Making such a scene in the middle of the day, in a public place... What if you had been exposed? Idiot."

"That bitch seduced Sesshy! She forced him to sleep with her!"

_What? Hojo hadn't been the one Kagome had been with last night? Then who? Oh wait -_

"By 'Sesshy' you mean Hisakata-sama?"

"Yes!"

_Woah. Kagome, just what have you done?_

"He isn't a one to be tricked or seduced. If he truly mated with her, he must have done it out of his free will."

"As he's so deeply in love with me, there is no way – " the rest of Kagura's sentence faded away.

The blond girl had doubled over. She was laughing.

"That's it, you bitch," the youkai shrieked, raising her fan.

"You got that one right," Kayade said raising her head. She was grinning.

And then she unmasked her scent and let the sealing spell drop.

Kagura gasped.

"_You! _How? Why?"

Kayade smirked and swished her white tail.

"Still wanna fight me, wind witch?"

Kagura glared daggers at the wolf princess.

"My power exceeds yours. After all, I will once inherit the lands of my father and become the taiyoukai of the northern lands."

"You're nothing but a spoiled brat of a wolf!"

A dangerous spark flashed in Kayade's bright green eyes.

"You know, maybe I should kill you. My father still has not avenged his pack which you killed. And I should make you pay for hurting my friend... Do you have any pride, you puppet of Naraku?"

Kagura paled.

"I have my pride, that's why I want to kill that seducing miko! And I was freed of Naraku long before you were born. He was killed centuries ago."

"Indeed you were freed of him! And do you recall who it was that freed you of his grip? What a lovely way to repay that debt, killing her over an icy bastard who's unable to love!"

"Do not talk like that of my Sesshy...!"

"He is not yours. He will never be. And you know it very well. Wouldn't it be about a damn time to stop fooling yourself? You will never have him."

Kagura paled even more as she heard her words. For a while she just stared at the wolf demon, her eyes wide, a hurt expression on her face. Then she turned on her heels and stomped away.

Kayade watched her go and sighed.

_Those were cold, evil words that I spilled over you. I'm sorry. But you'll understand, Kagura. You'll understand that I had to it. _

"Kayade-chan? Is everything all right?"

"Sure," the youkai answered, calming the worried miko with a smile.

"What happened to her?"

"I told her a few facts of life and she left."

"Just like that?" Kagome frowned.

"I told her that she had better not mess with me."

Kagome blinked. She found it rather hard to believe that the rich, Sesshoumaru-obsessive woman would leave just because of hearing a few facts. She could sense Kayade wasn't quite telling the truth... But if she was lying, then she had her reasons. And it was not Kagome's business.

"I see," the miko replied with a little smile.

* * *

Kagome was staring at the phone on the table beside her. It troubled her. It troubled her very much. She was a very bad person. She felt so guilty! She glanced the phone again.

What would Hojo say? Would he leave her? Could she get enough courage to tell him?

Kagome glanced at her cat. It was unfair how calmly he was sleeping. Kagome sighed. She wouldn't get a peace of mind before she'd do it...

She stretched out her hand and grabbed the phone. She dialled Hojo's number.

"Hello?"

"Hey Hojo.."

"Kagome, my love!"

"Ehh, listen, I.. I have to tell you something."

"Yes?"

"I... I... Last night I.." Kagome swallowed. "I'm really really sorry about last night."

"You don't need to feel sorry. It's me, who should apologize," Hojo insisted.

"Huh?"

"I was too eager. Sorry. You were just so beautiful last night.."

"Oh no, no! Really, I'm apologizing."

"Well fine then. I forgive you, of course I will, my heart."

"I... I have to go now.. Bye."

"Bye, sweetie!"

_It's you who should apologize, huh? Not exactly, Hojo...I doubt that. If you just knew.. What I did.._

Kagome felt low. She felt ashamed. She felt guilty.

But though she was feeling all these feelings of shame, she still couldn't make herself to regret what she had done.

She huffed. She was fed up with sitting home alone, her cat being her only company. That was all Kagome had been doing these past few weeks. Besides, she desperately needed something to do. If she stayed at home, her thoughts would wander to some things she rather would not think about.

A girls' night out would do it. But who she'd ask to keep her company?

Ayumi, Yuka or Eri couldn't come to a question. Kagome just didn't want to see them. Not now. They'd just be prying how did the date with Hojo go.

Rin-chan...? Surely but...

_Oh yeah, by the way, last night I slept with your boss! _Nuh-uh.

And Ayame was already back in Hokkaido... A pity.

Then who..?

Kagome grabbed her phone again.

"Ka-chan."

"Hey, it's me, Kagome."

"Hi, Kagome-chan!"

"I was thinking if you haven't got anything better to do tonight.. Then maybe we could go somewhere together."

"Ooh, sounds fun! Sure I could come with you. Where should we go? What should we do?"

"No idea.. I just need to do something, you know.."

"I know the feeling... Well, get ready. I'll be there in 30 minutes, is that okay with you?"

"It's fine. See ya then!"

"Bye!"

* * *

They were sitting on high chairs, in the side of the club. A mass of people was moving along the music on the dance floor.

Their drinks were on the counter in front of them. Kayade was gazing the club, checking out cute guys. Kagome was staring at the shiny wood on the counter.

"So, what is it?"

"Huh?"

"Something is troubling you," Kayade reckoned. She knew exactly what it was, but she also knew that Kagome would have to let it out in order to ease her mind.

"Uh..."

"It's okay. I understand if you don't want to talk about it."

For a while they sat listening to the music the dj played.

"Thanks," Kagome said then.

Kayade took a sip of her drink. She watched the glass in her hand.

"So... things are not going so well with Hojo anymore, are they?"

Kagome flinched.

"What do you mean?"

"The tricky customer today. The guy you were with last night... It was not Hojo, was it?"

Kagome first paled and then she blushed.

"No, it wasn't Hojo. It was Hisakata Sesshoumaru-sama."

"With Hisakata-sama!"

"You know him?"

"Well, more by his reputation, really... I mean, my parents have known him for ages. I wouldn't say they're exactly friends, but they get along... So.. yeah.."

"I see..."

"You want to talk about it?"

"No.. I... I don't really know."

"Why did you do it?" Kayade asked quietly. She set her had glass back onto the counter and then patted Kagome's shoulder comfortingly.

"I... I had a date with Hojo. I don't know, I still like him but somehow things are not how they used to be anymore. Uhh.. I don't like him like I used to. I... I didn't want to see him last night, but I went anyway. When he kissed me, I suddenly felt embarrassed and.. I don't know, I just wanted to get out. So I left and went to a bar, I had a crappy week and wanted to forget about it, you know... Anyway, I had had a couple of drinks when I saw Sesshoumaru was there too. And that he had already drank a LOT, so.."

"Hisakata-sama? Drinking?" Kayade interrupted.  
"Yeah."

"From what I've heard of him from my parents, he really doesn't drink that often. Well, he probably had his reasons too. Go on."

"Well, I couldn't just leave him there. So I escorted him to his home and there.. well... Then things just got a little bit out of control."

"So it really doesn't mean anything?"

"No... it's nothing, really. He's just good-looking.." _.. and a damn good kisser,_ Kagome added in her thoughts.

"That one I don't deny," Kayade giggled.

Kagome took a little sip of her drink.

"Don't worry about it," Kayade said suddenly. "I know you must feel uneasy and guilty and ashamed and all. I mean, it must feel awful. But honestly, Kagome-chan, you're not a bad person. Everyone makes mistakes. You were a little drunk.."

Silence fell again.

"Now.. forget it all just for a while! Let's go to the dance floor."

Kagome allowed Kayade to drag her over to the dancing people. And indeed, soon the worries were left behind. The song they were playing was a little slower one and one that Kagome liked very much. Soon for her there was nothing else than the dim darkness of the room, the dance floor and the music.

_

* * *

He could see her. She was standing on a little forest-clearing, the kitsune pup was sitting on her shoulder, the monk and taijiya were standing next to her - but there was no sign of his idiot half-brother. _

"_He's after Kikyo, isn't he?" the miko asked._

_Sesshoumaru was standing fifteen yards away and he could clearly smell her usual sweet scent turning saltier, she was close to tears._

"_Kagome, you know he's a jerk..."_

"_It's okay, Shippo."_

_Sesshoumaru then realised that this scene he saw was not a dream image. It was one of her sealed memories broken free._

"_I'm sorry, I forgot my bag," the miko said, putting the kitsune pup down. "I have to go and get it."_

_Kagome turned and walked away. The kitsune tried to follow her, but he was stopped._

"_No, Shippo, don't go after her. Kagome-sama needs some time alone."_

_The taijiya sighed._

"_When will Inuyasha see how much pain he is causing to her?"_

"_Not until it is too late, I'm afraid," the monk reckoned._

_Sesshoumaru followed the miko. He found her sitting on the ground on another clearing. She was leaning against an old well. One silent tear rolled down her cheek._

"_Kagome, you're nothing but a shard-detector to him. Why do you deceive yourself? Why do you cling to a false hope? All he cares about is killing Naraku, getting the Shikon jewel and being with his brought-back-from-death-girlfriend. And guess what, Kagome? You're not on his 'I care about' - list." _

_Sesshoumaru stood quietly among the trees, watching her._

_Even though he did not care about the miko, __he felt angered by the way his worthless half-brother treated her. After all, Sesshoumaru had been there himself when Inuyasha had told her that he'd protect her. Didn't the hanyou have any honour? He had made a promise._

_Kagome raised her head and looked straight back at Sesshoumaru._

"_You're not supposed to be here," she told him._

"_If it had been my choice, I wouldn't be here," he replied._

"_I see."_

_Sesshoumaru walked over to her and lowered himself so that he was on the same level with the sitting girl. He couldn't no longer control his movements and he knew this was no __longer a memory. Now he was in her dream._

_Sesshoumaru traced with his clawed finger the moist path that her teardrop had left behind._

"_I don't want you to cry," he said._

"_I'm not crying anymore," she whispered back softly. Kagome turned and closed their distance, placing a soft kiss on his lips. __He soon deepened the kiss._

_The taiyoukai wrapped his arms around her and pulled the girl into his lap. After the kiss was broken she leant her head against his shoulder. Here she was safe. Kagome closed her eyes. He would protect her._

**

* * *

  
**

**Chie: **Okay, I want to make one thing clear here. When Sess is visiting Kagome in Kagome's dreams and when the dream is memory-dream, Sesshy has some control over his actions. Except, of course, if he IS in the memory, then he acts like he has acted before.

BUT when the memory-dream changes into Kagome's own dream, Sess can't control himself anymore, and so abides Kagome's will... mwahahaha.


	10. Ironic

**Disclaimer:** Characters do not belong to me but Rumiko Takahashi. Worship her. I'm not making any money by writing this, nor am I violating Takahashi's characters (much...)

Chapter title from the song by Alanis Morissette (oh, I hope I spelled that right.. o.O;) and it has SO great lyrics... :D

**Chapter nine - Ironic**

"Ayame speaking."

"Hey mom!"

"Ka-chan! How are you?"

"I'm just fine, settled back at here and back in work as well," Kayade replied with a smile.

"That's good to hear."

"I've got something _delicious_ to tell you, mom!"

"Oh? What has happened now?"

"The mighty have fallen."

"What do you mean by that, Ka-chan?"

"By that I mean that Hisakata-sama has mated a human!"

"No way!"

"Yes way! Mom, honestly, I know it sounds unbelievable, but Kagome-chan told about it to me herself and –"

"_Kagome_, you say?"

"Yeah, Kagome-chan and –"

"How do you know Kagome?"

"Mom, we've been working at the same place for an year and half now!"

"You have? Huh, talk about coincidence..." Ayame's voice trailed off.

Kayade rolled her eyes.

"... Wait a second... Did you just tell me that Kagome and _Sesshoumaru..._?"

"Yes, mom, that's how it went."

"But... Why? How? How did this happen? There's NO way that.."

"Are you okay, mom," Kayade asked feeling a bit worried.

"I think so. Well, as okay as I can be after hearing Kagome has mated with.. with... What about Hojo?"  
"It appears her feelings aren't so strong for him anymore. Better this way, honestly."

"Better? How can it be better!"

"Don't you think they'd make a cute couple?"

"Well, Sesshoumaru is a little too much... well, _Sesshoumaru_."

"Ahhh, but that's the point, mom! What if Kagome-chan will be able to break through Hisakata-sama's barrier of ice?"  
"Hmm... I think see where you are getting at, Ka-chan.."

"Exactly. What would happen if Hisakata-sama finally got himself a mate? I bet he'd change – a lot."

"And we all could stop worrying about our lives. Yes. It could be good..."

"Yup!"

"But if he just dares to hurt her, I will surely...!"

Kayade laughed.

"I know, mom, I know... But okay, I gotta go now.. bye!"

"Bye sweetie! Greet Kagome for me."

"I will... bye."

* * *

Hitachi hung up.

"Wow," he said shaking his head.

"What now?" Rin asked.

"Better prepare yourself, dearest. The end is coming."

"What are you taking about?" Rin asked her eyebrow raised.  
"Sesshoumaru-sama. I'm talking about Sesshoumaru-sama."

"For kami's sake, Hitachi! Spill it out already!"

"Sesshoumaru mated the miko last weekend."

"He _DID_?!"

Hitachi had to cover his delicate ears for Rin's happy squeal was too high and too loud to his liking.

"Oh this is great! Great!"

"Whoah, stay put, will ya?"

"This is wonderful! That explains why he hasn't showed his face in the office lately. My oh my..."

Rin danced happily around.

"You've lost it, dearest," Hitachi said in a regretful tone as he watched his mate dancing around, shaking his head.

Then Rin suddenly froze.

"Rin?"

She turned her head so until she was facing him. Hitachi gulped and took a step back as he saw the expression in Rin's eyes.

"R-Rin? Hun?"

"ARGH! That damn sulky inuyoukai! I'm _so_ not talking to him!" Rin declared, crossing her arms over her chest.

Hitachi blinked.

"Who told you?" she snapped.

"Kouga did."

"Kouga? Now I'm really mad at him! He should have told _me_!"

"Huh? Kouga you mean?"

"No, not Kouga-kun! I'm talking about Sesshoumaru-sama! He should have told me!"

"Now now, dear..."

Her cell phone rang then.

"Miyame Rin."

"Miyame-san, where _is_ he?"

"Oh, it's you again, Takane-san."

"He hasn't been at work for three days, damn it! Where is he?"

"Uh, Sesshoumaru-sama decided to take a little break..."

"What! He _runs a company_, damn it! He can't just 'decide to take a break' and disappear! Without telling me even!"

"I know, Takane-san, and I'm sorry... But it's just something he can very well do, I mean, you know what he's like.."

"Argh, that stubborn bastard... Well, anyway, I'm sorry to bother you, Miyame-san, after all it's not your fault that our boss is so irresponsible. Well, I have to go now, my work has doubled up since he's gone. I hope I'll have time to eat dinner..."

Takane-san hung up before Rin had a chance to say bye.

She huffed and glared at her cell phone.

"What now, dear?" Hitachi asked.

"That was Takane-san, the vice-president of Sesshoumaru-sama's company. You know, he's been breathing on my neck all the time, asking where Sesshoumaru-sama is and when will he coming back." Rin rolled her eyes.

"Well, it's understandable, after all Sesshoumaru-sama..."

"I'm _so_ not talking to him!"

* * *

It took exactly one week before Rin's worry overtook her anger.

"Where are you going now, dear?"

"I'm going to see Sesshoumaru-sama. Right now."

"I thought you were so not talking to him."

"Oh shush! He's been away for ten days! Something could have happened! I have to check up on him."

She closed the door after her.

"Sesshoumaru-sama!" Rin shrieked at the sight of him.

Sesshoumaru startled at the loud voice.

"Rin."

"You look _terrible_!"

And so he did. Rin had known him for over 500 years, and _never_ had she seen him like this.

His long silvery white hair was messy, his thin face was even paler than usual, his clothes were wrinkled and in disorder, his pose was stooped and there was a somewhat pained expression on his usually blank face.

Rin hurried over to him.

"I was so worried! What is it?"

Sesshoumaru turned to look at her. He did not reply.

"What have you been doing?"

"I have been here. Thinking."

"Have you spent TEN days just here, on that sofa?"

"On this very spot."

"Have you been drinking or something," Rin asked, her eyebrow raised

Sesshoumaru growled.

"NO! That was the cause to this in the first place."

"Please don't say you mated with Kagome-nee-chan just because you were drunk."

"How do you know about _that_?" Sesshoumaru demanded to know, noticing the sudden disappointment in her voice.

"Hitachi heard from Kouga a week ago."

_Kouga. So word had travelled again. Everybody knows of my shame and downfall. Maybe... If I commit Seppuku now, I can regain__ my lost honour... Maybe... Yes._

"But honestly, you shouldn't just sit here sulking when – "

"This Sesshoumaru does not sulk!"

Rin went on, ignoring his statement.

"- Takane-san has to do all your work too, and keeps yelling at me because you're gone and - "

"Maybe he should get used to doing my work."

"Huh? What are you talking about?"  
"I might not return to work."

"What? Are you resigning? It's _your_ company, damnit, you can't - "

"I'll commit a Seppuku," Sesshoumaru declared.

Silence fell into the room as Rin gawked at the inutaiyoukai, who now looked determined.

Then the little black-haired woman let all of her frustration show in just one, swift move of her hand.

His hand flew up to cover his burning cheek. He didn't even growl for he was so surprised. Rin's dark eyes were flaming.

"You _jerk_!" she shouted so that Sesshoumaru had to wince at her voice being too shrill and loud.

"You won't be killing yourself for such a pitiful reason!"

"Pitiful? Have you got no idea how shameful deed it was to do?" Sesshoumaru roared back.

"So what!" Rin yelled, making Sesshoumaru startle again. From where had she picked up such an attitude? The damn cat demon had spoiled his little girl...

_No, Hitachi is not to blame of this change. She has grown up._ Now he finally saw it and finally admitted it to himself. Rin had grown, she had become a determined woman with a temper. He felt a sting of loss inside him.

"Now you sit there and listen," she huffed, shaking her finger at him. If she had not been so furious at him, she would have been laughing her head off at how the tables had turned.

Sesshoumaru was just too shocked at his sudden realisation to react.

"So you went and got drunk and made a mistake... So what? Everybody makes mistakes they regret."

Silence fell. Rin's anger fade away. She sighed and sat down on the sofa next to him.

"Want to talk about it?"

Silence fell once more.

"It's just not that simple," he said finally.

"Tell me," Rin pleaded.

And so he did.

The next morning Sesshoumaru walked into his office, as if nothing had happened, wearing impeccable clothes, his hair in perfect order, his face wearing no expression at all and well, just being his perfect self. Takane-san nearly spilled tears of joy as he saw him, and Rin was happy to finally get peace from the over-reactive vice-president's constant inquiry. Sesshoumaru had sat down behind his desk and continued his work like there had been no pause at all, not bothering to explain his sudden disappearing to anyone.

* * *

"Good afternoon, Rin-san."

"Oh no, not you," she moaned aloud.

Kagura was as if she had not heard her.

"Let me guess, you're here to see Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Exactly. Would you inform him, it's urgent."

"I doubt he wants to see you," Rin warned.

"Please. It's important."

_Please?_ Rin blinked.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, there's a guest for you," Rin said into the speaker.

"Who is it?"  
"Kagura-san."

"I'm busy now."

"She told me it's urgent and important."

"I don't care."

"She said please."

"..."

Rin waited for his answer.

"Fine, she may come in."

"He will see you now," Rin said to Kagura.

Kagura smiled at her and stepped in.

"I'm glad of this honour, Sesshoumaru-sama," Kagura said bowing down.

Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow. Who was this woman in front of him? Surely not the Kagura he knew.

"What is it now, Kagura?"

"I've been deceiving myself for too long. I'm sorry for all the trouble I have caused to you. I came today to say goodbye. I know that I will not have you, no matter how much I would want it. I can't get through the barrier around your heart, unlike your chosen and therefore I admit my loss."

_Huh? What is she talking about? 'My chosen'..?_

"So I say goodbye to you. I hope you'll be happy. Treat her well."

"What are you talking about?" Sesshoumaru barked out coldly.

Kagura turned back to look at him, her hand lying on a doorknob.

"I'm telling you to treat well your chosen mate, the miko. She's so lucky to have you. I sincerely wish that you will be happy together."

With that she walked out.

Sesshoumaru just stared at the closed door. And then he recovered.

_Wait, even Kagura knew? Well, something good happened because of that mistake.. She gave up on me... Finally._

His door opened again and Rin peeked in.

"Seshoumaru-sama? Tell me all!"

"Kagura came to inform me that she has given up on me. Then she said goodbye. And finally she wished me to be happy with the miko, my chosen mate."

"Aaawww," Rin squealed. "But will you?"

"Will I what?"

"Will you be happy with the miko, your chosen mate?"

Sesshoumary snarled.

"Get out, now!"

Rin glared him and then slowly, reluctantly, walked out of his office, wearing a sulky expression.

* * *

"Really?"

"Yes... As you have seen, we have got more customers lately. So, I guess we'll need to increase our staff. That would also mean a little shorter days for you two. And maybe you could get Saturday free of work too, occasionally."

"That would be great!" Kagome smiled.

Share-san nodded.

"Well, that's the plan."

"All right," Kayade replied.

"Good. Then girls, back to work. I can survive in the kitchen by myself, but there are so many customers that both of you are needed in the restaurant. Go on now."

"Hai, Shaere-san!" they replied.

As they were walking back, Kagome nearly fell. Luckily, Kayade caught her in time.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, thanks."

"What was that?"

"I just.. for a moment I felt a bit dizzy. I don't know, I'm coming down with something. I felt a bit sick in the morning too."

Kayade sniffed. Nope, nothing was wrong with Kagome's health, she could tell that by her scent. But there was something that did not belong there. Kayade bent closer to take Kagome's scent in better.

"What are you doing, Kayade-chan?"

"Huh? Oh sorry..." Kayade let Kagome free of her grasp.

"How are _you_ feeling? You seem a bit pale."  
"I'm just fine," Kayade said, forcing a smile.

Yes, she was fine, but just horror-struck. There was a certain tint in Kagome's smell, the same she had once smelled on her mother.

She was pregnant.

_This is not going to be good, _Kayade gulped. _Hisakata-sama wouldn't like to hear this... And what about Kagome-chan? How will she take the news?_

Kayade shook her head.

_Poor Kagome-chan. What a mess you are in now.._

_

* * *

He heard the yelling and growling from a distance. Mildly curious - and since he really had nothing to do anyway - he walked where his ears led him._

_She was sitting on a riverbank, staring into the depths of the streaming water and he sensed clearly the pain that h__ung in the air around her like a veil. The place reeked of his half-brother. Clearly, they had had a disagreement of some kind. Well, that did not surprise him, his imbecile half-brother never tend to agree with anyone. Not even with those humans that were his 'friends'. Not even with that young miko who had freed him of his seal._

"_Why do you linger here alone?" He asked keeping his voice calm and emotionless._

_She turned alone and her brown eyes widened as she saw him._

"_Sesshoumaru!"_

_He took a step closer and watched the miko, remaining as cold as ever._

"_What do _you _do here?" The miko asked._

"_My doing is not for you to know."_

"_You're after Tetsusaiga, again! INU - "_

_She was not able to see him move, but in an instant he had grabbed her throat into a steel-like grip. Kagome gasped, trying desperately to breathe. He was strangling her, her feet were uselessly kicking in the air._

"_Scream now and you will die."_

"_You will kill me anyway," she hissed between her teeth._

"_You have a point there, wench," he said coldly, tightening his grip even more. _

_He saw her close her eyes. There was a slight change in her scent and then he let suddenly go of her, growling a curse. _

_She had used her purifying power._

"_You're lucky I don't have my bow with me."  
He gave her his death-glare. She didn't even startle, instead she stared back at him, looking defiant. He couldn't smell any fear from her._

_And then the look in her eyes softened. A small smile appeared onto her lips. She walked over to him and placed her hands on his shoulders._

_Sesshoumaru_ _tried to sweep them away, he didn't want the wench to touch him, but it was no use. He no longer could control himself. The dream wasn't a memory anymore._

_She raised her head and pressed a soft kiss on his lips. He wrapped his arms around her and answered the kiss, deepening it._

No! _Sesshoumaru roared in his mind. _No, this is not what I want!

Why do you not want this?

Oh no, not you here too.

I'm wherever you are. After all, I _am_ you.

_Sessoumaru_ _didn't bother to reply to his demon self. _

But just stop and think about it. Does it really feel that disgusting? Is it really that awful? To hold someone like this, someone that could love you like this, without asking anything back? Why do you fight against it?

You know nothing!

I know more than you think. I know how you feel deep down inside. You _need_ a mate, no matter what you insist on saying. A mate like her.

_They stood there __on the riverbank, in one another's arms, their lips locked and eyes closed. It was a precious moment, and Kagome wished that the time could stop for them._

* * *

"Here?" Sesshoumaru eyed at the tall building. It was a famous recording company.

"Yes! I've been thinking and then I got this idea. This job is a perfect for you!"

"What would be my position?"

"You'll be taking the microphone."

"_What?_"

"I know you have a lovely voice! Why bother to hide it?"

"Rin..."

"Now, come on, let's go in!" the little woman dragged her boss inside the building.

Sesshoumaru sighed. He knew he was going to regret this.


	11. Wherever you will go

**Disclaimer: **No, I still don't own the most of the characters in this fic and I still write this for fun, not for money… The song is performed by The Calling

**Chie: **There has been a little jump, everyone... A month has passed since the end of our last chapter.

–nod-

**Chapter 10 – Wherever you will go**

"Hello. I would like to see Hisakata-sama, please."

"I'm afraid that he is working at the moment. He doesn't wish to be disturbed."

"I understand that, but could you please just ask him? It's really important."

"All right then, but he might still refuse seeing you."

"I understand that."  
"Could you please tell me your name?" Rin asked casually.

"I am Shirakawa Kayade."

"Ka-chan?"

Kayade blinked. Only her parents used that nickname, so the secretary must have known her parents. And all her parents closer friends were youkai, except –

"Miyame-san?"

"Oh, please, call me Rin. It has been ages since I last saw you, sweetheart!" Rin said, rising up from behind her desk and hugging the wolf demon.

"You could barely walk way back then," she added, smiling.

Kayade smiled back, not knowing what to say.

"Oh right, I was informing Sesshoumaru-sama..." Rin walked back to her desk as Kayade waited patiently.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, you have a guest."

"Again? I don't have time for such a nuisance."

"It's Ayame-chan's daughter."

"Ayame has a daughter?"

"Sesshoumaru-sama will see you," Rin informed.

"I will?"

"Great," Kayade smiled.

"Pleased to meet you Hisakata-sama," she greeted him when she was in his office. "I am very sorry to trouble you like this but it's urgent."

"Go on."

"Kagome-chan is a very good friend of mine and she told me about your little... incident."

_So there's the information leak. The miko's friend just has to be a daughter of that loudmouthed wolf. Typical. I bet the whole universe is laughing at me right now._

"But now it seems that there are... uh... some consequences."

"Consequences? What do you mean?"

"Kagome-chan is... She is carrying your pup."

Sesshoumaru stared at her for awhile, letting the words sink in.

_This is all your fault! _He bellowed to his inner demon.

_What are you complaining about? You have mated her just once and she's already bearing you a__n heir! An ideal mate, she is._

You _mated her, not me! I don't want to have anything to do with this whole mess!_

_Well too bad for you, since you already are in this whole mess._

Sesshoumaru answered with a growl.

_Are you going to abandon her? _his demon self asked.

Sesshoumaru froze. He had his pride. But what about the pride when the miko would give birth to a filthy hanyou?

_I am not going to abandon her._

_Well I'm glad to hear that._

_I am going to kill her._

_WHAT! _his inner demon snarled. _And anger half of the taiyoukais? Are you mad?_

_No, I'm completely sane, _Sesshoumaru calmly replied. _I'll kill the miko and then I will commit seppuku._

His inner demon bared his fangs and attacked his other self.

"Uh, Hisakata-sama, are you all right?" Kayade asked, eyeing the taiyoukai nervously. She had felt his youki gradually increase for a while now.

After a few minutes of fighting over the control, Sesshoumaru was able to push his demon self back and silence him.

"Everything's fine. Now, leave."

Kayade bowed and turned to leave, but instead of the closed door she faced Rin.

"Please, wait a minute, Ka-chan."

Rin walked over to her boss and eyed at him, inquiringly.

"You fought with him again, didn't you," Rin reckoned.

Sesshoumaru didn't answer.

"As I thought." Rin examined him by her gaze. "Are you planning to kill her?"

Sesshoumaru still remained quiet.

"If you're going to kill her, you have to kill me too," Rin said matter-of-factly.

"And me," Kayade added firmly from the back.

Sesshoumaru eyed at the two determined women who stood defiant before him.

"Fine."  
"Are you still planning to commit seppuku?"

Sesshoumaru looked into Rin's pleading brown eyes. Cursed. Since when had this ningen had so much power over him?

_Since the very beginning, _the inner demon helpfully pointed out.

Sesshoumaru ignored him.

"No."

"Good," Rin said. Her eyes brightened up and she smiled.

"Come, Ka-chan."

Once the thick door between the two offices was carefully closed, Rin turned to Kayade.

"He's so damn stubborn," she said, shaking her head.

"Uh, Rin-san," Kayade said, looking a little nervous, "Don't you think he'll hear you even from there?"

Rin laughed.  
"Oh no, he won't. His whole office is sound-proof... Otherwise he couldn't stand working here. We can talk freely here."

"Oh, that's a relief."

"Is Kagome-chan really pregnant?"

"Huh?" Kayade startled. "How do you know about that?"  
"It's called eavesdropping," Rin replied, smirking.

"Eavesdropping? But if Hisakata-sama's office truly is sound-proof..."

"I have my ways," Rin answered. "It's a shame that Sesshoumaru-sama dislikes Kagome-nee-chan that much..."

"I know, they'd make such a cute couple." Kayade stated.

"Don't you think? Besides, Sesshoumaru-sama really needs a mate. Though he'd never admit it, I can tell he feels a little bit lonely."

Kayade nodded.

"He'll change his mind about her... Eventually."

"I only hope that does not require a brainwash," Rin replied sighing.

* * *

He stared at the mirror. The top he was wearing left his arms bare, and he wasn't used to that. He scowled.

"It looks good on you," Rin assured smiling brightly.

Sesshoumaru sighed in his mind. Just why had he let Rin do this to him again? Lately his secretary had been trying to drag him along everywhere she went. Sesshoumaru thought that maybe it had something to with his Seppuku-concerned thoughts. Maybe Rin was now trying her best to keep him busy, in order to make such self-destructive thoughts leave his head.

The top he was wearing was white. It had a high collar and a black dragon in the front. The trousers Rin had picked out for him were also black. There were many little chains decorating it.

"Now wait here, I think I saw a belt that would match so well with your top."

"Oh look at that skirt! So cute, I have to get it!"

"Eri-chan, we are not supposed to be buying clothes to ourselves now, remember?" Ayumi said.

"Yeah, we're looking clothes for Kagome-chan to wear..." Yuka reminded.

"It's okay. We can stop by in that store if you want," Kagome hurried to answer. She really couldn't care less.

After trying out several pieces of clothing, it was Yuka, who spotted her.

"Rin-chan?"

The dark-haired woman raised her head and looked around.

"Yuka-chan!" she walked over to them.

"What are you all up to?"

"We were supposed to be looking for clothes that Kagome-chan could wear..."  
"Oh, any special occasion?"

Kagome blushed and Ayumi and Eri grinned.

"Yes," Yuka continued, "we were looking for clothes she could wear on her wedding night."

"I see," Rin smiled. "So the date is set then?"

"Yes... The big day is in 5 weeks", Ayumi said.

"It's been awful these past weeks. So hectic, running around, trying to get everything set," Kagome said rolling her eyes.

"Rin, what is taking you so long?" a deep male voice asked.

All five dark heads turned.

It was a handsome young man. He had blue eyes and blonde hair. He wasn't tall and was clearly younger than the females were. He had quite a pale skin. Also, he clearly wasn't Japanese.

Kagome gasped and took instinctively a step back.

"My my, Rin-san, who is he?" Eri asked, clearly checking the guy out with her gaze. "I thought you were married."  
Rin laughed.

"It's nothing like that, Eri-san. He's my cousin, Ken-kun." Rin gestured him to come closer.

"Ken-kun, here's Eri-san, Ayumi-san, Yuka-chan and Kagome-nee-chan."

"Hello Ken-kun!" Eri said grinning.

"Hi there," Yuka greeted smiling.

Ayumi just smiled and nodded.

The blond-haired man nodded, letting his gaze to fly past all the three girls before finally setting on Kagome.

"Pleased to meet you, Ken-san," Kagome said, bowing deep.

Sesshoumaru had to admit that the miko maybe was cleverer than seemed.

He had not met the miko since their little incident. He could clearly smell her confusion, nervousness and...

He could smell himself on her.

He mentally groaned. Not like this! Why did his scent still linger on her? It had been nearly 8 weeks since... since...

_You're one spoiled pup._

_This Sesshoumaru is no pup._

_Then why do you act like one? Complaining and whining when something happens that you don't like. Thinking you can get whatever you want just like that, and restlessly running from one place to another._

Sesshoumaru snorted arrogantly, not bothering to answer.

_Wouldn't it be already a time for you to grow up, settle down and get yourself a mate?_

_So that was what you were after again._

_In theory she could already be seen as our mate. Hence she's carrying our pup._

_She will never be my mate!_

_Never say never._

Sesshoumaru sniffed the air. Yes. The scent was faint, but it was still there. The miko was waiting for his pup. What a mess he was in, indeed!

Kagome only could stare at him, horrified. She had not met him since well, _that night_, and now all the feelings hit her fully. Would he even remember? After drinking such an amount of alcohol? Not likely.

_So great. You slept wit__h him and he does not even know._

She felt his eyes on her. The cold stare made her blush.

It was rather disturbing, standing so close to him. And especially when he was clothed the way he was. The white top left his arms bare... In a flash she saw those bared arms wrapped around her body.

Kagome shook her head violently.

Coming to think of it, why was Sesshoumaru dressed like that anyway? It wasn't that she was complaining, since the clothing really looked good on him but...

Kagome shook her head again.

_Hold your horses, girl, and watch what you're thinking._

"Rin-chan," Kagome asked, "I'd like to talk to you... in private, could you maybe..."

"Sure," the elder woman answered smiling.

Rin and Kagome walked out of the little store, leaving Sesshoumaru to deal with Kagome's friends.

"So what is it?" Kagome asked.

"What's what?" Rin replied with a question.

"That Ken-kun charade... And those clothes? Why is Sesshoumaru-sama dressed like that?"

"I just thought he might soon need that kind of clothes."

Kagome raised her eyebrow.

"Oh yeah?"

"Okay, okay, I'll tell the truth..." Rin's smile faded.

"You know, for some time Sesshoumaru-sama has been feeling depressed.."

"Oh?"

"He didn't feel like going to work at all, just stayed at home, doing nothing for ten days..."

"Oh my."

"And then he told me that..." Rin sniffed and Kagome noticed that her eyes were filled with tears.

"He... he told me that he'd commit a suicide."

Kagome gasped.

"No! Why would he? I mean, he seems to be doing really well and..."

"I know, he's rich and successful and handsome and everything. I managed to persuade him not to kill himself and since then I've been dragging him around, so I can watch after him. And maybe he'll forget such gloomy thoughts if he has something to do.

Kagome nodded.

"Wow, I had no idea. You're doing the right thing, Rin-chan. Could there be any way I could help him?"

"Just try your best to understand him. He's a bit unstable at the moment. Be comforting and forgiving."

Kagome nodded again.

"I'll do that."

* * *

The moment he had been left alone with the three strange girls they started a non-stop blabber.

"Wow, Ken-kun, where are you from?"

"So cute, you look just like a foreigner, Ken-chan!"

"How old are you, Ken-kun?"

"I'm from Denmark, my father is Japanese and my mother is Dane. I'm nineteen," Sesshoumaru answered calmly, ignoring the insulting "Ken-chan". Rin would soon get back with the miko, and hopefully save him.

"Soooo..." Eri said, eyeing Ken-kun, a smile on her face and her head a little askew. "Are you seeing someone, Ken-chan?"

Sesshoumaru startled at the bold question.

"Not really."

"Not really? So you have someone you like?"

_Yes._

_No, I have not!_

"No, I don't."

The smile on Eri's face widened.

"You know Ken-chan, you're veery cute..."

"Here she goes again," Ayumi whispered to Yuka behind Eri's back.

"I thought she was seeing that cop," Yuka frowned.

"They broke up a few days ago."

"Thank you.." Sesshoumaru said, watching the dark-haired woman. She was an extremely bold! Were all women like this nowadays?

Eri leaned closer to him, a mischievous smile on her lips and her eyes locked with his.

"Would you mind to date a woman who's older than you are?"

Luckily it was on that moment when Rin and the miko got back.

"Eri!" Kagome gasped at the sight that met her. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," she answered innocently.

Kagome hurried over to the two and pushed the woman away from him.

"I'm terribly sorry for her being so rude, Ken-san," Kagome said bowing, her cheeks burning red.

_Just leave the girls with him for five minutes..__._

Sesshoumaru shook his head.

"It is fine."

Maybe there indeed were worse choices than the miko.

_Don't you owe her an apology? _the inner demon pointed out.

_Apology? Never. This Sesshoumaru does not –_

_Yeah yeah, got it. Well, at least you should thank her for saving you from that disgustingly rude woman._

Damn. His demon self had a point. He should thank her.

Damn the honour.

Rin eyed at the two and then dragged Kagome's friends with her to the other side of the shop.

"You don't believe how cute dress I just saw over here –"

Kagome and Sesshoumaru were left alone, the miko staring at the floor feeling very nervous to be alone with him, and the taiyoukai still fighting with himself.

"Thank you," he blurted out suddenly.

Kagome startled and raised her gaze into his eyes, then blushed at the stare he was giving to her, her gaze flying back to watch the floor.

"No... I'm the one to blame, leaving you alone with her. I only did what I had to. You don't have to thank me, Sesshoumaru-sama." the miko bowed down.

Sesshoumaru eyed her, surprised. What answer he had been waiting for, he had not expected this kind of a reaction from her.

Kagome turned around and walked away from him.

"Girls! We should get going already."

A few moments later, Rin came back to him, holding a black leather belt.

"Here it is! Now go to put it on."

Sesshoumaru took the item from his secretary, suddenly feeling older than ever.

* * *

It had lasted for only an hour or so, but she was already yearning to get out of there. It couldn't be a good sign, not at all. After all, she was supposed to get married to this guy. If she could not bear his company for one dinner in a fancy but a bit crowded restaurant where they served delicious food, how could she survive growing old with him..?

Uhh, she did not want to think about it.

She smiled to Hojo and let him hold her hand as she talked with him.

* * *

"I'm sorry but we're full."

"You heard him, dear. Let's go and find another restaurant."

"But I want to eat in _this_ one!"

"Darling, don't you think you're acting a bit childish..? ... I'm sorry for her, really, we'll not trouble you anymore. Come on, honey, let's go."

"Hey! There's Kagome-nee-chan!"

Kagome turned her head as she heard her name and saw a familiar figure, smiling and waving at her.

"See! There's room in their table."

"But darling, it wouldn't be appropriate to just crash in..."

Hojo was now also listening to the conversation the couple was having in front of the waiter, who was gradually getting more and more annoyed.

"Are they friends of yours?" he asked from Kagome.

"Yeah..."

"Please, it is no trouble, just join us," Hojo then said to them.

_Whaaaat? _Kagome squeaked in her mind.

The waiter left to get extra chairs. As Rin walked towards their table with the tall blond-haired man, Kagome spotted that they were not out by just the two of them.

Oh no.

"Hello, Kagome-nee-chan."

"Hello Rin-chan."

"Is this the Hojo-kun I've heard about?" Rin grinned.

Kagome blushed.

"Yes... Here's Hojo, my fiancé."

"Glad to meet you! I'm Miyame Rin and here's my husband Miyame Hitachi. Oh, and my cousin Ken-kun."

"Please, sit down," Hojo welcomed them, smiling.

Kagome watched horror-struck at the final seat that was free after Rin and her husband had seated themselves.

Sesshoumaru would be sitting right next to her.

The taiyoukai just couldn't believe it. Just what were the odds..?

The waiter came to take their orders. Kagome tried to casually eat her dinner, trying not to think about the position she was in.

Sesshoumaru was fighting against his inner youkai. Her scent filled his nostrils and the inner youkai was overjoyed of having her so close to him that it constantly wanted to take over.

Hitachi eyed worryingly at the other taiyoukai, feeling how unstable his youki was. This had not been a good idea. What had Rin been thinking anyway?

The said Rin was cheerfully talking with Hojo, the only one at the table who had no clue about the truth behind "cousin Ken-kun" and his little adventure with Kagome.

Though, if Hojo had peeked what was happening under table he might have been shocked. Sesshoumaru's left hand was inches from Kagome's skirt-cover thigh when his right hand was desperately trying to pull back the wandering limb.

Meanwhile, Kagome was fighting with herself too, trying her best to block out the mental images, some of those were dream-scenes, some memories of the night when...

She nearly choked out the piece of bread she was eating.

"Kagome, my love, are you all right?"

"Yes, I'm fine," Kagome lied, faking a smile for Hojo.

"So the wedding's in five weeks?" Rin asked.

"Yes, that's true," Hojo replied smiling.

"I remember how that was," Hitachi joined in the conversation. "Hectic."

"Indeed!" Hojo laughed.

Their orders came and Sesshoumaru picked up his drink. That meant – as he realised a few moments too late – that his right hand wasn't anymore holding back his left hand. He cursed heavily in his mind.

Kagome nearly choke on her drink this time, as she felt his determined hand settle on her thigh.

This time, luckily, the others did not notice for they were in so deep conversation.

It was a sudden move that first made her feel a bit uncomfortable.

But as the seconds passed it didn't feel so bad after all. She felt a blush ride on her cheeks. Kagome side-glanced at the silver-haired man. He was drinking his wine, as if nothing would be happening.

It didn't feel that bad.

_Whatever_, Sesshoumaru thought, _I'll just leave it there_. If she was not complaining why would he bother to move his hand? Besides, watching her blushing was a rather amusing sight. He mentally chuckled at the thought of what would her fiancé do if he ever found out.

_Are you finally lowering yourself to see things from my point of view?_

_Oh, shut up. I just thought I'd –_

His demon self stiffened.

_What now?_

_Use your nose._

The miko's scent still filled his senses, but now it had a different tint. Same tint he had noticed that morning.

_She's heating up._

_No! You're so not going to –_

_Let me take control! She needs me, can't you tell!_

_Settle down you horny bastard! Remember where we are. Remember who she is!_

_She's our mate!_

_The hell she is, she's the damn miko and __you're not mating with her again._

_Let me go –_

_Never..!_

"Se- Ken-kun, doesn't the food please you?" Hitachi asked quickly. He had sensed Sesshoumaru's youki growing even more unstable as before. Just what was with him?

"No, the food is great."

The rest of the dinner went peacefully. Rin, Hitachi and Hojo talking with each other about everything possible, while Kagome and Sesshoumaru ate in quiet. She concentrating on her food and locking her confused emotions deep into her heart. He concentrating on his food and locking his inner demon deep into himself.

Though, his hand never left its place.

* * *

"You're not being serious!"

"It would be something different.."

"Indeed. I'm not going to do this."

"Oh, come on. It could be fun... Stress-relieving", Rin grinned.

"Still I do not –"

"Come on, don't be so boring, Sesshoumaru-sama! Besides, what could happen? You'd naturally wear a sealing spell, as always!"

"Hmm."

* * *

"Really? When?"

"Next Friday.. Been planning it whole week! It'll be so fun!"

"Are you going to get – uh – entertainer there?"

Yuka giggled.

"We had that in mind, yes..."

Rin wasn't a cruel person. She had only grown up in a questionable environment. She had learned to use any means possible to get what she wanted... And what she wanted was nothing but the best for his beloved Sesshoumaru-sama. And she had decided that to be the best for Kagome-nee-chan too.

"Oh... I know just the right guy for you..." she said, smiling widely.

* * *

The night had truly been so much fun! Kagome had to admit she had been a little scared of the idea of letting Yuka, Eri and Ayumi throw her a bachelor party, but they all had had a great time together. First they had been in movies, then went to a dinner and after that they had been partying on one very cool club.

And now they were all tired and happy, sitting in Eri's living room splattered around on sofa and chairs.

"Have you had fun, Kagome-chan?"

"Yes I have, Yuka-chan!" Kagome answered. "This has been the best night ever, thank you, girls."  
"Oh but Kagome-chan, the night is still young!" Eri giggled.

"Huh?"

"We still have one surprise for you!" Ayumi said.

"Come in, hun!" Eri called.

The man stopped in the doorway.

He was typical Japanese with tanned skin, short black hair and dark eyes. He was well built and wore only a tight leather pants.

He was a hottie.

That was what Yuka, Eri and Ayumi saw.

But Kagome saw something else.

She saw Sesshoumaru.

Kagome paled then blushed and paled again.

_Why him?_ She wanted to know, why it always was him, no matter where she went, why.. why him..?

Sesshoumaru growled out his refusal in his mind.

Not her. Anyone but her. Had Rin been planning this from the beginning? Oh, she was so going to pay...

They stood there, staring at each other, both petrified, both paled, both wanting to be in some other place.

Somewhere else, where would be no damn mikos.

Somewhere else, where would be no seducing ice princes.

And then their thoughts were broken as Kagome's friends started to rhythmically clap their hands together, chanting:

"Lapdance, lapdance, lapdance..."


	12. All Star

**Disclaimer: **Do not own, do not make money… Song performed by Counting crows.

'Gou' is mentioned in this chapter, it's performed by Ken Narita... :)

A week has passed since the last chapter ended.

**Chapter eleven – All star**

He was everywhere. They played his song in the radio, they interviewed him on the TV, they made articles of him in the papers. It was rather silly. The whole Japan had gone crazy for this one new hot young foreign singer. Anyway, he had really only sang one song!

Kagome looked at his picture that was next to an article in a magazine she had bought. He was good-looking, she had to admit.

The guy was an year or so younger than she was. He had silvery blond, short and spiky hair, blue eyes and pale skin. He had tribal tattoos in his both shoulders and three earrings in his right ear. His left brow was pierced too. He looked cool and his voice was good, but Kagome still couldn't understand the flock of fangirls who thought that Ken Narita was their god.

Kagome was again feeling confused about Sesshoumaru. The whole supposed-to-be-romantic-dinner with Hojo had turned into something completely different when Rin, Hitachi and "Ken-kun" had joined their table. Luckily Hojo had been blissfully unaware of all that had been happening in Kagome's mind – and under the table. Sesshoumaru's gesture had really surprised Kagome. Why would Sesshoumaru-sama be suddenly doing something like that? It wasn't like him...

And at the bachelor-party, then! It had been very awkward, but still..

She couldn't deny that she had enjoyed it.

A thought of Hojo doing a lap dance for her made her laugh. But if she imagined it to be Sesshoumaru.. Her reaction would be completely different.

Kagome covered her cheek with her hand. There was the spot.. He had licked her while doing the dance. Kagome still blushed at the thought.

Curse his skilful tongue – especially when she knew what all he was able to do with it.

* * *

"Those new clothes look good on you!"

"Thanks, Kayade-chan!" Kagome smiled.

"Um, I'm getting tired. Let's go to check out the bar."

"Sure."

They made their way through the crowd to the bar-counter.

"Hello ladies," the bartender grinned.

"Hiya!"

"What would you like to have?"

Kagome examined the list.

"I think I'll get the opening special."

"Uhh, Kagome-chan, are you sure about that?"

"What do you mean?"

"It has alcohol in it."

"So?"

"So, that's not good for your.. you. I mean, still remember that one time, when.."

"All right, all right, I got your point. I'll just take ice tea, then."

"And I'll try the opening special."

"Right, just a minute," the cheerful bartender said, taking out clean glasses.

"This club is so great!"

"I know," Kagome replied, "we were lucky to get the invitations."

"I think it's cool that Shaere-san knows the owner."

"Yeah, but I think it's cooler that she gave the invitations to us," Kagome giggled.

"Here you go, girls," said the bartender, setting the drinks on the counter before the two women.

"Thank you," Kayade smiled.

They sat on their chairs, sipping of their drinks.

It was a new club. So new that tonight it actually was the opening night. The club was rather packed but all the people there were invited guests. Kayade and Kagome had been able to get the invitations from Shaere-san, for the owner of this club had once been on the same class with her and they had been friends. Since Shaere-san wasn't much of a party-person, she had given the invitations to her employees.

Kayade and Kagome were overjoyed.

"Oh my gosh! It's Gou! We gotta go to the dance floor now!" Kayade squaled.

Gou was the big hit of Ken Narita. His one, first and only song.

Kagome liked the song too, so she let Kayade drag her to the dance floor among the other partying people.

As they danced, letting the music flow around them, Kagome let her gaze wander in the crowd that was not on the dance floor. Among the few people who were standing next to the wall she spotted a familiar figure.

Kagome paled and tugged Kayade's sleeve.

"Look, it's _him!_" What was he doing _here_!

Kayade followed her friends gaze and gasped.

"Oh my gosh, it's Ken Narita-san!"

Whaaaat!

Several heads turned to look at them, then the heads turned to stare at the lonely figure leaning against the wall.

And then the mass of fan girls rushed over to him, screaming and squealing and shrieking. They soon had circled him completely, he was stuck between the wall and the flock of fans.

"Kayade, what are you talking about?"

"That guy! He's Ken Narita!" The blonde-haired girl was bouncing.

"The hell he is! He's Sesshoumaru!"

"WHAT!"

"My my... I think I owe you an explanation.."

The both girls turned to see who had talked.

The small black-haired woman smiled sheepishly.

"It didn't go as I had planned though," she admitted, "I only wanted to hear him sing."

"Rin-san," Kayade said after getting over her surprise, "what are you talking about?"

"I dragged him to a record-company... He was supposed to sing only one song. I had no idea his voice was _that_ good and well, the situation has kind of got away from our hands."

"Kind of?" Kagome said weakly. "You call that a 'kind of'!" she added pointing at the still screaming fan girls.

"Poor Sesshoumaru-sama. We should help him out of there," the tall man said frowning.

"Oh, Hitachi-san, hello. Sorry, I didn't see you," Kayade said bowing.

"It's all right. I just came here anyway..." Hitachi's eyes narrowed.

"Have I met you before, girl?"

"She's Ka-chan, Ayame-chan's daughter!" Rin said, poking his husband's rib.

"Really? My, it's been 20 years or so?"

"I really don't remember." Kayade said blushing.

"Wait," Rin suddenly realised, "where did Kagome-nee-chan go?"

Kagome was desperately making her way through the ring of screaming fans, muttering curses under her breath.

"Excuse me, coming true!"

"Move it!"

"Excuse me, excuse me, sumimasen, sorry..."

And then she was finally there, standing next to him.

"Boy aren't you in trouble," she said in a low voice.

He glared at her and she knew he had heard her silent words.

"I could get you out of this you know."

"What?"

"Please. Don't kill me."

Sesshoumaru was about to ask what the hell the crazy wench was talking about when he froze. It was not like he could say anything at all now, since his mouth was kind of busy at the moment.

The fans stood there, watching wide-eyed and disappointed as an unknown, dark-haired beauty wrapped her arms around their godly Ken-kun's neck and without any greater ceremonies kissed him deeply on the mouth.

Several yards from the circle of the now disappointed, jealous fans stood three figures, gawking at the pair, their jaws dropped.

It felt as minutes had passed when the kiss finally broke. Kagome took a deep breath and watched Sesshoumaru like a woman madly in love.

"Come, darling, let's go back home," she said on a loud voice and grabbed his hand. Sesshoumaru was too stunned to refuse and thus allowed the miko to lead him away from the suddenly silenced club.

Kagome stopped as she reached the side of the sidewalk.  
"Taxi."

"What the hell were you thinking, wench?" he snarled.

"Oh shut up," Kagome said, looking for a cab.

_Shut up? The miko was telling this Sesshoumaru_ _to_ shut up_! Oh that little, filthy – _

_Oh, I love her!_

_Silence you fool, I never asked your opinion, in fact –_

He was about to start once again blaming his demon self for everything, when a sudden flash got his attention.

He turned his head and saw a photographer, holding his camera, ready to take another picture.

"Get away!" Sesshoumaru bellowed and was about to go after the photographer, when a small but determined hand wrapped around his wrist and pulled him back.

"Leave him be. Let's get you home."

Sesshoumaru glared at the wench for some time, but since it didn't seem to have the hoped effect, he gave up with a snarl and got into a cab that had just arrived.

Kagome gave the driver his address and they set forth.

Sesshoumaru didn't know what to think of the fact that she actually still remembered his address.

"You owe me one," Kagome said casually.

"What?" he growled.

"Oh come on," she said turning to look at him. "I saved your butt out there."

"I did not ask for your help."

"But of course you didn't. You wouldn't want to lower yourself for something like that," she said, barely hiding the sarcasm in her voice.

Sesshoumaru stubbornly stayed silent and watched out from the window.

"Why were you there anyway? You don't seem to be a clubbing person."

The utter silence lasted for a minute or two.

"It was Rin."

"She still keeps dragging you around?"

"Unfortunately."

"Oh, you poor thing."

After a few more minutes in silence, Kagome turned to look at him.

"Thank you."

He gave her a questioning glance.

"For not killing me," she explained.

"You're welcome."

"Although maybe you should... Kill me, I mean."

"Why so?"

"Because I so boldly saved your butt although your highness clearly did need no help."

He saw a glint in her eyes and knew she was teasing him

Sesshoumaru did not know what to think of anymore, the miko was different than he had expected.

_You never tried talking with her._

_I did not say I was changing my mind._

_Neither did I,_ the inner demon chuckled.

So she was teasing him? Very well. Two could play that game.

"You should grovel in the ground before me, begging for your life. Such an outrageous deed as saving one's 'butt' without any need to is truly unforgivable."

What? The stuck up guy had a sense of humour? Or was the comment just a reflection of his inhumane arrogance?

"If I'll pay for the taxi would that make up for the grovelling? I'm wearing a new dress and wouldn't wish to dirty it."

"I'll consider it."

"My, you truly are being generous today, your highness."

"No need to call me 'your highness', 'the almighty Sesshoumaru-sama' will do."

"Oh, you are so humble, almighty Sesshoumaru-sama."

"Always."

The cab stopped.

Sesshoumaru got out of the car. Before slamming the door shut, he paid the driver.

"Take her home."

* * *

"I still can't believe this."

"What?"  
"That the Ken-chan I tried to hit on is the Narita Ken."

"Yeah, now I guess it's harder to get his attention since the half of Japan is drooling after him," Yuka noted.

"He already has a girlfriend."

"What?" Eri squeaked.

"Don't you two read news?" Ayumi wondered. "There is a picture in the newest issue of – "  
"Let me see!" Eri grabbed the magazine from Ayumi's hands.

"Aww, it's not fair! She is really pretty and she's – " Eri gasped.

"What is it, Eri?" Yuka asked.

"She... She's _Kagome_!"

"What? No way!" Ayumi said. Both she and Yuka rushed over to Eri and stared at the picture over her shoulder.

"My, it is Kagome!" Yuka blurted.

"This is not fair! Why does Kagome always get the guys _I_ want!" Eri said, clenching her hands into fists.

"But wait... Kagome can't be seeing someone while she's engaged to Hojo-kun!" Yuka said, biting her lip.

"This all is got to be just a misunderstanding," Ayumi said quietly.

"There's no way that it would be misunderstanding," Eri barked, getting up.

"Where are you going, Eri-chan?"

"I'll make sure that Hojo-kun sees this!"

"What? Wait, that's not – ! Eri-chan! Wait – !"

* * *

"Higurashi," Kagome answered the phone.

"Kagome…"

"Hojo?"

"Kagome… Are you cheating on me?"

"Huh? I uhh.. I..."

"As I thought," she heard him sigh, "I saw the picture."

What picture?

"If it would be just me I would forgive you. But I'm afraid that it's also the honour of my family in question. My parents found out and they find it inappropriate for my betrothed to be seeing other guys right before our wedding. We have to give up on the engagement. I have to abide to the will of my parents. You may keep the ring, but it's over. The wedding's off."

"Hojo-kun..."

"Good bye, Kagome my love."

He hung up.

Now Kagome did truly feel guilty of what she had done. Hojo's voice had clearly betrayed his sadness and hurt.

And still she felt relived, for there was no need to lie anymore, no secrets to be kept. She was free again.

The next morning she awoke at 5 o'clock, screaming "Inuyasha" out loud.

A moment later she pondered what the heck was up with that yell. She then concluded that she had once again seen one of those weird dreams of hers.

As on so many mornings lately she had to ran into the bathroom, she always felt so sick and weak in the morning now. She had wondered what it was about, but now, on this very morning she stopped to think about something she earlier had refused to even consider.

Could it be that she was...?

Oh no!

Everything spoke for it, but no, she did not want it to be true, no, it could not be...

And still, it was the most natural and obvious option. She got up and walked out of the bathroom in utter shock.

* * *

He woke up an hour before his alarm clock would have awaked him. The reason for his awakening was some lunatic who apparently was trying to get through his front door. He rolled onto his side groaning. Soon the freak would give up and leave and he could go back to sleep...

After fifteen minutes of ongoing racket he got up cursing and dressed himself. The noise was giving him a headache – what a perfect start for a day!

With a snarl he opened the door, giving the nuisance a furious glare.

"Sorry," the nuisance said weakly, stepping in. He was about to throw the insulting person out, when he was stopped.

_She is not being herself._

_That's no excuse. Why should I care?_

_She has to have a reason for coming here this early. Just let her stay until you find out what she's up to._

Sesshoumaru for once agreed with his inner demon and walked into his living room, only to find that the miko was already there sitting on his sofa. She turned he shocked brown onto him.

"Sesshoumaru," she simply addressed, "I'm sorry."

He said nothing.

Kirara jumped onto the sofa and settled herself into the miko's lap – but the woman didn't to notice.

"I.. I might be pregnant."

So that was what this was about.

"Ah. I see."

"How can you take this so calmly?"

"I have known about this for some time now."

"What? How?"

"I smelled the change in your scent."

"The change in my.. What are you talking about?"

"I have a superior sense of smell compared to yours."

"Huh?"

"I'm not a pitiful human like you."

"What?"

"I'm a demon."

"WHAT!"

At first she thought he had hit his head. Badly.

"You're telling the truth now, aren't you?"

"Why would I lie?"

It was impossible, it was madness.. And yet it made perfect sense.

"Do a trick."

"What?"

"Do some demon-trick to convince me."

_Damn that wench I'm going to kill her for this._

_I truly love her._

_Shut up!_

"I will not lower myself into doing a silly trick. I do not care whether you believe me or not, it's your own issue."

"Forgive me for insulting your pride almighty Sesshoumaru-sama," she said sarcastically.

Minutes crawled on in silence. Then the miko winced as if she was in pain.

"Ohh, what am I going to do? What should I tell to my mother and to all of my friends? First Hojo breaks up with me and now this.. Can I even keep the baby? What will people say? Would it be better to give up the baby or –"

The demon broke free.

Sesshoumaru took Kagome's hands into his own.

"Do not worry for I shall take you as my mate and thus I shall take care of you and our pup until I die."

"Wh – umph!"

Once again Kagome forgot everything else as he pressed her tightly against his chest and kissed her deeply. She did not know what it was about him – or was it everything about him – that made her abandon every thought, making her to let him do whatever he wanted to do to her.

After the kiss was broken he nuzzled against the spot where her neck met her shoulder and whispered against her skin:

"Kagome, would you like to be my mate?"

Kagome didn't even have time to think about her answer, before Sesshoumaru quickly jerked away from her.

She noted that his eyes were back to amber again.

"Why are you suddenly telling me something like this?" she wanted to know.

"Forget that I ever said anything."

"How could I forget that you in principle proposed me?"

"What? I did not say such a thing!"

Kagome glared at him, her temper rising again. That guy...!

"Sure, fine, whatever. Be it that way then!"

He watched her stomp away and a few seconds later heard his door slam shut.

* * *

"Mind being my therapist for a while?"

Rin looked at the woman who had suddenly walked in.

"Sure. Just tell me what worries you."

"Well... It all started when I saved Sesshoumaru-sama from the fangirls in the club. The rumour spread of me being Narita Ken's girlfriend and so, Hojo found out and we broke up."

"Oh my, I'm sorry to hear that.."

"It only gets worse. This morning I realised that I'm pregnant for Sesshoumaru-sama and I went all the way over to tell him that just to be told that he already knew and that he – apparently - happens to be a demon!"

_Well wasn't that just smooth, Sesshoumaru-sama_, Rin cursed in her mind.

"And then he told me that he'd take care o me and our 'pup' 'til he dies..."

"Aww!"

"And the next minute he was telling me he said no such thing and told me to forget all about it."

_Sesshoumaru you jerk! You ruined a perfect chance..._

"Right... " Was all that Rin said aloud, "I guess you want some kind of explanation?"  
"Yes please, if you can give any."

"Oh, I can. First of all, Sesshoumaru is a demon, a dog demon to be exact. But, Sesshoumaru-sama isn't just any demon, he's the taiyoukai of the western lands. Now, every truly powerful youkai is based on a duality, and they have a true form and a human form..." Rin smiled to herself as she remembered the afternoon, centuries ago when Jaken, the green toad had proudly explained these same things to her. Sometimes, she missed that old grumpy toad.

"And thus their minds are also split in two. They have the rational mind and the primitive inner demon, who is less sophisticated and is a creature based on its instincts... And with Sesshoumaru-sama, they often disagree with each other. Usually it's Sesshoumaru-sama, his rational self who is in control – that's the way it should be – but sometimes, his inner demon breaks out from Sesshoumaru-sama's control – that's why his eyes turn to crimson sometimes. His demon self is in control."

Kagome paled.

"But that means – "

"Yes." Rin nodded. "Sesshoumaru-sama has told me that his inner demon has grown tired of living alone for centuries. He now wants a mate – a partner, a person to spent the rest of his life with."

Kagome stared at Rin and then slowly started to blush.

Rin watched the miko who was standing in front of her and smiled gently.

"And Sesshoumaru-sama's inner demon has decided that person to be you."


	13. Last drop falls

**Disclaimer: **Me does not own and does not make money blahblahblah.. Title from the song by Sonata Arctica.

**Chapter twelve – Last drop falls**

"You. What are you doing here?"

Sesshoumaru leaned back in his chair and watched the tiny youkai who was standing on his desk.

"I have come here to congratulate you, Sesshoumaru-sama!" Myoga answered.

"Congratulate me? For what?"

"Kagome-sama is a very good choice! She really is everything one could ask from a mate: strong, loyal, gentle, sweet and caring..."

"..."

"And in any case it is already time for you to get a mate, you've already lived alone for so long. I know you're a bit of a loner but still I believe no one's meant to be alone for his whole life..."

"..."

"And I know your father would approve too, he would have _loved_ Kagome and been very proud of you for getting yourself such a mate."

_Even he thinks that we'd make the perfect pair! Why are you still fighting against it?_

_Not now_, Sesshoumaru sighed.

_You know that you stand alone in this fight._

_Shut up._

_You've already lost the battle_, the inner demon announced brightly.

_Fuck off._

_Very well_, his demon self laughed and ceased.

"Have you thought about the mating ceremony yet?" asked Myoga.

"What? No, I have no intention to – "

"My my, Sesshoumaru-sama, we should really get the preparations started now."

"Why you – "

Myoga hopped down from his desk and made his way to the door.

"Rin-san, could you come in?"

Sesshoumaru sighed and buried his face into his hands. He was _not_ going to make the miko be his mate! This all was nonsense – misunderstanding...

Rin came in.

"Myoga-sama? Hello!" She picked up the flea.

Sesshoumaru slowly raised his head. Rin was conversing with the flea-demon. But that wasn't it all. There was someone else standing in the doorway.

The miko stepped in and walked over to him. She bowed deeply down.

"I need to apologise for my behaviour earlier this morning. I am sorry."

"Apology accepted."

She raised her head and look at him surprised – then she flashed a little smile.

"What is it, Myoga-sama? Why did you call me?" Rin asked.

Kagome turned and spotted the flea demon.

"Kyaa!" She shrieked.

Sesshoumaru soon found that the miko was clinging to him.

_Well, this feels rather nice..._

_No, it's troublesome. I wish she'd let go of me, now._

_Oh, do you really?_

"Wha – wha- What is that!" She yelled pointing at Myoga.

"Uhh..." Rin rubbed her neck with the Myoga-less hand.

"That is my advisor, the flea demon Myoga."

It was then when Kagome realised she was clinging to Sesshoumaru and swiftly got off him.

Flea demon... Dog demon...

Everyone in that room cast long glances at the girl who had suddenly burst into a loud laughter.

"Well, I guess every dog has his fleas," she giggled, wiping away the tears of laughter.

Rin chuckled, Myoga blinked and Sesshoumaru raised his eyebrow.

_Crazy wench._

"Uhh.. so.." Rin cleared her throat. "Why did you want me to come in, Myoga-sama?"

"Oh, right! We should start planning the ceremony. Ahh, Kagome-sama, excellent that you are here now too..."

"Planning the ceremony?" Rin blinked. "You can't mean – "

"Of course all the taiyoukais have to attend..."

"Wait a minute! What is the meaning of this, Myoga-jii-san? What ceremony?"

"But naturally I am talking about your mating ceremony," the flea answered matter-of-factly.

"My, uh, mating ceremony? With whom should I be mated?"

"Isn't that obvious?" Myoga raised his eyebrow.

Kagome turned to look at the silent dog demon sitting by her side.

"No, you can't mean – "

Myoga smiled.

"Woah... Slow down a bit, will you?" Kagome gulped nervously. Her face was flushed. Sesshoumaru _had_ asked her to be his mate – but on the other hand he had also told her to forget the whole thing. What was _he_ thinking about this whole situation anyway? His expression was as blank as always...

This would not do! She barely knew him! They wanted her to marry a guy she hadn't even dated? Weren't they now going a little bit too fast?

"I do not plan to be Sesshoumaru-sama's mate. No offence... But... It's just too rash right now, okay?"

Her words met utter silence.

"Uhh, right, I have to go to work now... Bye all!" Kagome walked out of the office, leaving two stunned demons and one pouting human after her.

* * *

"The famous singer dead, see the page 4," was on the front page of the magazine.

"Narita Ken, 19, sang himself into people's hearts with his song 'Gou'. Yesterday evening he left to Hokkaido travelling with his private plane. Narita-san never got to his destination.

'It was awful,' the pilot, Hirazuka Yoshino, 41, said. 'We hit the turbulence hard. I wasn't able to save us, we fell into the arms of the sea... It's a miracle that I'm still alive.'

'Unfortunate, very unfortunate,' commented Rin-san, 34, Narita's manager. 'I was just discussing with his recording company about making his debut-album.'

'He was too young to die!' says sobbing Sejimura Sakura, 17, a big fan of Narita-san. 'I can't believe something like this could happen to him!'

And what about Narita's mysterious girlfriend? (See the issue 34)

'Devastated,' tells Rin-san, 'she's completely devastated, I heard they were planning on an engagement.'

So, what did really happen? We found out that..."

"Nooo!" wailed the dark-haired, self-proclaimed Ken Narita's biggest fan as she settled the paper down from her hands. "This can't be happening!"

"I know," sobbed the other girl, "he truly was too young.."

"Losing such a talent..." the first girl sniffled.

"Narita Ken dead..." whispered the younger one of the two fans.

"I refuse to believe it!" the older one said, "he can't be dead, this is just a trick of some kind."

"Why would he do such a trick?"

"Maybe he got scared of all the publicity he got all of sudden."

"Or maybe he wanted to protect his girlfriend?" the younger suggested, taking out the issue number 34 of the magazine, taking out the article about Ken Narita and his girlfriend.

"Her identity is still unknown. Sure she has been lucky to get herself such a talented boyfriend.

'She rudely walked past all of us, that awfully arrogant look on her face,' says a fan, who wishes to stay anonym. 'That ugly wench just kissed him! Like that! Argh, that made me mad.' "

* * *

"Hello?"

"Uhhmm... Hi."

"Hojo-kun? What is it now?"

"I just... wanted to say that I'm sorry to hear that your boyfriend died."

"Umm... Thanks."

"And if you want to talk about it, I'll be here."

"Thank you, Hojo-kun."

"And maybe if you wish – "

"I have to go, sorry.. Bye!"

Kagome hung up. She had clearly heard the silent plea behind his words: "I still love you, Kagome. Say a word and I'll take you back.."

Kagome sighed. She wouldn't take him back, that was for sure. What had been between her and Hojo was over now. She did not love him. But what should she do then? She was alone now. She and her... Kagome placed her hands on her tummy. What kind of life would be waiting for her child? A half-demon child... How was she ever going to get herself out of this mess?

Later that day she saw Sesshoumaru. He was walking on the other side of the street. Kagome huffed. She had never really believed he would have died anyway. She was ready to bet that the arrogant bastard didn't even know how to die.

* * *

"Huh? Sesshoumaru-sama? Rin is not home."

"Doesn't matter, I came to see you."

_What?_

"Come in."

Sesshoumaru followed the cat demon in.

"So, what is it?"

"I wanted to hear your opinion."

"Yes?"

"What do you think about the miko?"

"Kagome-san? Well... She seems to be a sweet girl. I don't really know her so well, but Rin likes her a lot, and Rin rarely adores a person so strongly. Kagome is a gentle, caring woman, who also can be very determined and firm if needed... Certainly, she's a good girl."

"Do you think that I should take her as my mate?"

_WHAT?_

"I think it's your own decision, Sesshoumaru-sama. I doubt if you could settle down with someone, but if you would, that someone should be loyal and understanding, like Kagome-san is. But I really think you should decide for yourself. Don't let others to make the decision for you."

Sesshoumaru nodded.

"I appreciate your honest opinions."

There were very few persons Sesshoumaru liked. In his own way, he liked Hitachi. The cat demon was calm and silent like he was, but still he possessed the warmth the inu youkai lacked.

_Maybe on some level deep down inside you would want to be warm like him_, the inner demon philosophised.

_Hmm._

_Maybe a mate would help you to gain that warmth?_

_Would you already drop your nagging? I have made my decision._

_And I have made mine_, his demon self said, then becoming quiet again.

"But allow me to say this. No matter how solitary a soul one might possess, eventually, at some point he'll get lonely. He wishes to have someone by his side. The drastic changes we've been through these 500 years of living... To know Rin was by my side has really been a huge help. I think I might have not got over of the fast changes without her. When everything changed around you, you need to have something that remains always the same, you know? Everybody _needs_ someone. Even a demon. And in the end, does it matter if the mate is a human or youkai? Nearly every youkai is already deceased now anyway. And there's really not so great difference between humans and demons, after all."

* * *

"_Kagome, what is it?" Kouga asked, holding her hands in his own._

"_I'm fine, Kouga-kun, really..." Kagome said meekly._

"_No you're not! You're crying – and I can smell your blood!"_

_Kagome paled._

"_Who did this to you?" Kouga insisted to know._

A rather interesting scene, isn't it?

_Sesshoumaru's_ _answer was a low growl._

We have never seen this side of Kouga before, haven't we? _The inner demon noted._

"_It's nothing.."_

"_The dog-brat should be taking care of you - ! Let me tend your wounds."_

_Kagome paled._

"_There are no wounds," she said very quietly._

"_What do you mean? I can clearly smell your – " he fell silent._

_Kagome winced as Kouga's grip of her hands tightened._

"_Kagome, please tell me now that you two... That you didn't.."_

_She paled, blushed and then paled again - and finally nodded._

"_What? He mated with you!" the wolf demon bellowed. "He forced you, didn't he?"_

"_You're wrong!" Kagome snatched her hands free from his grip. "He did not take my by force."_

"_You gave your purity to him? Freely? Woman, are you out of your damn mind!"_

I was wondering who it had been.

Huh?

When I mated the miko, she wasn't pure anymore.

What?

Seems like your half-brother got lucky.

"_You don't understand, Kouga-kun..."_

"_No," he sighed heavily, "I do not understand. Why are you doing this, Kagome?"_

_She did not answer._

"_Why do you stay by his side? Why do you sacrifice yourself for him? He treats you like shit! Why are you still so loyal to him?"_

"_You just don't get it…"_

"_Where is he?"_

"_Huh?"_

"_Where is Inuyasha? I need to talk to him."_

"_I – I don't know."_

"_You don't know?"_

"_He was gone when I woke up."_

"_What? He mated you! This means he is accepting you as your mate! He shouldn't just leave you like that!"_

"_But he did." She sighed, holding back a sniffle._

"_He's supposed to protect you! What could possibly be more important to him than you?"_

_This time she wasn't anymore able to hold back the tears._

"_Kikyo," she answered on a teary, pained voice._

"_Kagome," he whispered softly. "I love you. I hate to see you suffer like this. Come with me. I'll take care of you. I'd never deceive you... Come with me, Kagome, become my woman. Become my princess."_

"_I'm sorry, Kouga-kun. I will stay by his side."_

"_Fine." Kouga turned and left. "You'll only hurt yourself," the wolf whispered into the wind._

_But Sesshoumaru heard his words._

* * *

"Hello Kagome! What a lovely surprise!"

"Hi, mom," Kagome responded and returned her mother's hug.

"Come in, honey! Would you like to have something?"

"Ehhh, a cup of tea would be nice..."

"Right then. Make yourself home, honey, I'll go to make us some tea."

Mrs. Higurashi went into the kitchen.

Kagome walked into the living room, and sat down on the sofa. She didn't want to keep secrets from her mom, but how was she ever going to tell? She sighed. Her mother was so not going to like this.

Mrs. Higurashi came back with two teacups. Kagome extended her hand to take the other cup.

Mrs. Higurashi gasped.

"Your ring, honey! You're not wearing your ring!"

_Here we go.__.._

"Umm.. Mom... You see, the current situation is that..."

"He _dumped _you! Why would he ever do that?"

"Because he thought I was seeing other guy."

"He thought? Then you weren't seeing other guy?"

"Well... Not seeing per se.. It was more like.. Uh, all right, I just had sex with him."

"What? Kagome, you cheated on your fiancé?"

"Yes. Though I didn't mean to."

"Oh my God! But... But why?"

"I don't really know. I was drunk, so..."

"Kagome...." Mrs. Higurashi shook her head, clearly disappointed.

"It gets even better," Kagome said with a sigh. "I'm pregnant."

Mrs. Higurashi dropped the teacup she had been holding.

"Mom? Are you all right?"

"Yes.. I'm... just a bit shocked... For how long, Kagome?"

"8 weeks or so."

Mrs. Higurashi indeed looked shocked.

Kagome sighed and got up. She collected the pieces of the broken teacup her mother had dropped.

* * *

The man had a long white hair tied on a low ponytail in the back of his neck. He was wearing jeans and a blue, knitted sweater. Overall impression that he gave was a neat and classy, calm and collected man. Not exactly what she had been waiting. But however he might appear, it still did not change what he had done, she reminded herself.

The man raised a questioning eyebrow.

"Yes?"

"I'm here to have a little talk with you," the dark-haired woman announced.

"Oh, you are?"

"Yes."

"I don't think so." Sesshoumaru was about to close the door when she shoved her foot in the way, moving incredibly fast for a human.

He snarled.

"Don't you try to brush me off like that, young man! It's about time for you to take responsibility of all that you've caused!"

_Woah, she sure has temper,_ the inner demon noted.

_Too much temper, _commented Sesshoumaru, growling.

"Calm down, woman."

"Let me in."

"Why should I?"

"Well, it's up to you, really. If you want that all your neighbours hear too of all you've done, then fine, we can have our talk right here..."

_Maybe it would be better just to let her in._

Sesshoumaru opened the door wide open and allowed the woman to step in.

The apartment was really beautiful. It had big windows and high ceiling. It felt as if the whole house had been bathing in the light. White was the main colour. On the walls there were peaceful calming paintings. Some greenery. The rugs on the dark wooden floor were also white. They were very soft and fluffy. The sofas in the living room were big and cosy, and also white. There was several big white fluffy pillows on them. Overall impression of the apartment was cosy, light, spacious and extremely tidy.

Not at all what she had been expecting. No matter. She was not giving him any mercy. The woman casually threw herself onto his sofa.

"Who are you? What do you want from me?" Sesshoumaru inquired coldly.

"I am Mrs. Higurashi. I came to here to discuss about that all you have done to my daughter."

_Ah, now I see where she got her temper from, _Sesshoumaru calmly exclaimed.

_This isn't good, pal, not good at all... An angry mother.._

_Like this Sesshoumaru would be scared of a mere human woman._

"What have I done to her then?" he asked, sounding bored.

"WHAT!" She shrieked.

Sesshoumaru winced as the high-pitched voice hurt his ears.

"How DARE you ask something like that! Insolent boy! You have ruined my daughter's life!"

"I fail to see how," Sesshoumaru said coldly.

"She was doing just fine! Her life was good! She had friends, a job and a good boyfriend... And then you came into the picture!"

"Yes?"

"You took an advantage of my daughter while she was in an incoherent state of mind!"

"What?"

"You slept with her and now, look what has happened! Her fiancé left her! She's pregnant for your child for Kami's sake... She's alone now! Totally alone! And she does not make enough money to be able to raise the child. And yet, you do nothing to help her!"

Sesshoumaru frowned as he spotted the tears streaming down her cheeks.

"She's alone," Mrs. Higurashi whispered hoarsely, "she's alone and it's your fault."

Blaming it all on him, huh?

"Look, my intention was not – "

"Intention! I do not care about your intention! The only thing that matters now are the results!"

Sesshoumaru suppressed a growl. Honestly, what was it with this woman?

"You.. You should just make up for it all. For her sake."

"If it's about money, you only have to tell me how much," Sesshoumaru replied emotionlessly.

Mrs. Higurashi laughed. It was a cold little laugh which held no joy in.

"Money is good, but not quite what I want for my only daughter."

Sesshoumaru looked at her coldly.

"I don't want her to be alone," she said, looking into his eyes.

He looked back, not blinking an eye.

"Marry her."

"What?" he hissed sharply. "Oh no. No. No way I would do that."

"You owe that to her!" Mrs. Higurashi insisted.

"Trust me, woman. If it'd be either a marriage with me or being alone, it'd be better for her to be alone. Now, may I ask you to leave my apartment."

Mrs. Higurashi eyed him for the one last time. Then she shook her head, wearing a sad expression. The human walked out of his house.

_Just what the heck was that?_

_She had a point though, _the inner demon reckoned.

_Well of course. She agrees with you that I should take her as my mate, _Sesshoumaru replied with a cold sarcasm.

_That is not what I meant._

_What then?_

_Have you ever stopped to think about how does she feel about all of this?_

_No. Why should I? Why should I care?_

_Even if you do not care of her, this is still your fault._

_My fault? Mine? Oh no. It's __entirely YOUR fault. It was you who mated with a filthy human. Not me._

_Hmm... You're right. I am to blame._

_Hey.. what are you up to?_

_I'm going to apologize._

_Hell you are! You are to remain under my control._

_Oh yeah?_

The inner demon broke free.

* * *

He waited behind her door. He had just rang the doorbell. She would soon be coming to open the door... After waiting a few minutes he ran out of patience and sneaked in. Kagome was nowhere in sight.

And then his ears twitched. They heard the sound of running water.

So, she was taking a shower.

A grin spread on his face.

As silent as only a taiyoukai could walk, he crept to the door of the bathroom.

She was standing under running water, her back facing him. Hunger filled his mind as he watched her naked form, water dripping down onto the floor...

Soon he had closed their distance.

The sudden sensation took her by surprise. But Kami, it felt good... she moaned in response.

And then it finally fully hit her. Somebody was licking her!

Kagome screamed.

Whoever it had been, he startled and winced at the sudden shriek. Kagome grabbed hurriedly a towel and wrapped it around her wet form. She looked who the invader was.

And as she saw him she gasped.

"SESSHOUMARU?" Oh no, this couldn't be happening. Kagome clenched her fists. "You... What the hell you think you're doing! Sneaking in while I'm taking a shower! You SICK PERVERT!"

"I – "

And then she spotted his eyes. They were crimson.

"Oh, no, it's you."

"Kagome, please.."  
"You just walked in and started licking me! Sheesh! Tell me a one good reason why I shouldn't kick your butt right here, right now!"

He kneeled down before her.

"Kagome... I don't know what got into me, honestly. I couldn't resist..."

Kagome buried her face into her hands.

"I came here to apologise."

"Huh?" Kagome raised her gaze, suddenly forgetting her anger.

"I destroyed your life by my actions. That wasn't my intention, honestly. You must believe me. You must forgive me."

_NO! _Sesshoumaru yelled somewhere on the background of his mind. _What the hell are you doing? Give the control back to me right at this second..! You hear me? I'm not fooling around. ARGH! I'll slaughter you._

The inner demon ignored his threats. He kept on staring into Kagome's brown eyes, pleading for forgiveness.

"Please. You're my mate to be."

"Hey. Hold on a sec! Since when I've been your mate?"

"But surely you are my – "

"No, I'm not your mate."

"But it's all decided.."

"You can't make decisions for me!" she yelled, her voice rising again.

"But – "

"No buts! Now you listen to me! You think I could ever be your mate, knowing you want me and love me, while the real Sesshoumaru despises me and hates me? No way. I'll never be your mate. Nor his! Never! Heard me? I couldn't possibly live with you two... I'll.. I'll rather take Hojo back, than be your mate."

Sesshoumaru was still kneeled before her, stunned.

"NOW GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"

He stood in the corridor, staring at the door she had slammed at his face for the second time now. He had been... rejected? It couldn't be. He had been rejected?

Even Sesshoumaru had stopped yelling dead threats.

The miko had rejected him? HIM? He was rich, handsome, powerful... He was the taiyoukai of the western lands for Kami's sake! The miko had the nerve to reject this Sesshoumaru?

For centuries women had fallen at his feet. There was no one, NO ONE, who would NOT want to be the lady of the western lands.

He would make her see.

Oh yes.

The plan was forming in his mind.

He would show to her. He would show! She would be begging before him, begging to be his mate.

And then it would be his turn to slam the door shut.

Oh yes. The perfect plan.


	14. No matter what

**OOC Warning: **Due the evil plans of his, Sesshoumaru will not quite be himself from now on.. Well, he IS himself, but to make Kagome fall for him he plays the role of prince charming himself... XD So prepare for Sesshy-OOC:ness and anything cute and romantic stuff. XD

**Chapter thirteen – No matter what**

It is lunch time. I leave from the office I work at after informing my boss that I am going to have lunch. I see a nice-looking restaurant nearby so I step in. I have never been in this restaurant. I choose a table near the window and settle myself there. It doesn't take long, before a blonde waitress comes over and asks what I would like to have. I decide to order a cup of coffee and a big sandwich, for I had quite late breakfast and am not that hungry yet. The waitress smiles and nods. She goes to pass on my order. I sit back in my chair and wait.

The little bell on the door rings and I raise my gaze. It's a silver-haired man, who's dressed in a fine suit and all, carrying a bouquet of red roses with him. I wonder what he's up to. He can't be any deliver-guy, my gosh is that Armani he's wearing? Pretty handsome he's too.

The waitress comes, with my order. She stops as she sees the newcomer.

"Hisakata-sama! What are you doing here?"

Ah, so she knows him. That explains.

"Good day to you, Shirakawa-san," he answers politely. "May I speak to Higurashi-san?"

The waitress walks over to my table, flashes me a quick smile and then goes back to stare at the man. I don't really get what is happening. They obviously know each other, but why does the waitress look so puzzled? Well, no matter to me. I take my sandwich and start my lunch.

"Uh, which Higurashi-san?" I hear the waitress ask.

"Kagome, of course."

"Uh, right... Please wait here."

I hear her heels clicking on the wooden floor as she walks out of the room. I side glance at the man. He's still standing there holding the flowers, looking very calm. I sip my coffee.

The blond waitress come back, followed by a small young woman dressed in a white blouse and black short skirt and a pale green apron.

"Sesshoumaru-sama!" she blurts out looking amazed. "What are you up to?"

The man grabs her hands and bows his head.

"Higurashi-san, I want to offer you my sincere apology for all the trouble I've ever caused to you."

The black-haired waitress blinks.

The man hands the roses over to her, then bows one more time and leaves.

I wonder what that all was about as I take a final sip of my coffee. I gesture for a bill and the blond waitress rushed over to give it to me.

"Uh.. Did that.. just...happen?" the seemingly puzzled blond-haired waitress wondered out loud.

"I suppose so," the other waitress answered clutching the bunch of roses in her arms.

I pay for my lunch and head back to the office.

"He's out of his mind," Kayade declared.

"Don't know what's got into him! I mean, this time, he was – "

"This time he was what?" Kayade asked.

"Uh, nothing..." Kagome blushed and buried her face into the roses.

This time his eyes had not been flashing crimson.

* * *

"You know, I think he seriously is going to make Kagome his mate," Kayade declared.

"Oh, what now?"

"He showed up at work just to apologise and gave a bouquet of roses to Kagome."

"Sesshoumaru bringing roses and _apologising_?"

From the background Kayade could hear her father's voice yelling in surprise something like "What, he's not gay?"

Then she had hard time trying not to giggle as hearing how her mother went on about what the hell had Kouga meant by that and how her dad was laughing his ass off and telling he was just joking around.

Kayade sighed. _A normal family, my ass..._

* * *

The doorbell rang.

"Good afternoon, milady," he bowed his head.

"Sesshoumaru-sama. What are you doing here?"

"I came to invite you to dinner with me – you like Italian food, right?"

"Yes, I love Italian food... But why would I come with you? Isn't this like a date or something?"

"No. This is a part of my apology, so please allow me to treat you just one dinner - I know it's not much of an apology, but – "

"All right, all right, fine, I'll come," Kagome huffed. She wasn't thrilled about the idea of Sesshoumaru and her alone on a dinner, in fact she was a tad bit scared – the guy was dangerous. This was definitely not the way he usually acted, he was up to something. Treating her a dinner out of remorse? Ha, like that would ever happen! Hell must have frozen over or something.

'You're planning something, Sesshoumaru, most probably something I'm involved with... But what is it?' Kagome asked herself.

But still, Italian food was her favourite. She wouldn't reject an offer for a free meal – even if the guy who paid was a cold, personality disordered demon.

"Wait, before we go, take this and open it," Sesshoumaru said offering her a white cardboard box that was tied up with a red silk ribbon.

"And what's this then?" she inquired, eyeing at the box suspiciously.

"Just a little something that I thought you'd like."

Kagome huffed again and took the present from his hands. She left him standing there and walked into her bedroom, carrying the box. She put it down on her bed and stared at it.

What was this all about? Now he was bribing her with gifts too, eh?

Kagome carefully opened the box.

There was a piece of clothing inside. She took it out to examine it. It was an elegant dress made of lavender silk. The model was one of a classic evening gown.

Kagome could only stare. She had never had any garment so beautiful. Gosh, just how much had this thing cost anyway? "Just a little something" – yeah right!

She started to dress herself.

Sessoumaru watched as the miko stepped out of her room, wearing the dress he had bought her. He nodded. The girl was quite pretty for a human. Sure she wasn't as attractive as some females he had seen, but his inner demon could have chosen an uglier wench too.

"Good," he said eyeing at her. "Now, shall we go?"

Kagome nodded mutely and followed him out of her apartment.

They walked down the stairs and then out of the front door. He opened the door of the awaiting taxi and she nodded in thanks, stepping inside of the car.

Once they were in he held out a clean white silk scarf.

"Cover your eyes."

Kagome didn't really get why she should be doing that, but found better not to argue. She let him tie the scarf around her head.

She couldn't really tell where they were going – nor how much time had passed. And then the car stopped and he helped her out. They walked up some stairs and then they were inside. He helped her into the soft seat.

"Now, you can take off the scarf."

She took it off and for awhile blinked at the sudden brightness.

It wasn't a restaurant.

"Just _where_ are we?"

"In my private plane."

"You know, this is called kidnapping for Kami's sake... I've had enough of you. Let me out."

"I'm afraid that is no longer possible," he stated calmly as the pilot was starting the engine.

"Let me go! Now!"

"No."

Kagome glared at him furiously. He wore the blank mask on his face again.

She should have known something like this would happen...

"So treating the dinner was just a catch?"

"No. We are still on our way."

"On our way to where?"

"To the restaurant."

"Wha – hey, you mind explaining me the whole thing right now!"

Sesshoumaru sighed.

"We are going to have a dinner of Italian food in a restaurant..."

"Yes?"

"... In Milan."

"... WHAT?"

"I said, we are going to have a dinner of Italian food in a restaurant, in Milan."

"Milan? Like the Milan in ITALY?"

"That is correct."

Kagome looked at him, stunned.

"You mind closing your mouth, you look rather stupid when you let it hang open like that."

Just how had she got herself into _this_?

* * *

"Surprise!" the four young women yelled and formed quickly a group hug.

Kagome stared at them.

"WOAH! What's THAT?" Ayumi asked, gawking at the evening gown Kagome was still wearing.

"Seems like you have some explaining to do," Kayade grinned.

"Come on girls, let's get inside," Rin hurried.

The women packed in Kagome's living room.

"What are you all guys doing here?"

"We came to cheer you up. We thought you must feel lonely, you know... After Hojo breaking up with you and all." Yuka said.

"Eri would've come too but.. She was busy with.. ehh, stuff." Ayumi exchanged a glance with Yuka. They both knew the exact reason why Eri didn't attend, she had got a bad conscience of her sudden burst of jealousy and for that reason had made up an excuse not wanting to face Kagome.

"And we brought a movie and some snacks!" Kayade informed, showing off the plastic bag.

"Aww, so sweet of you guys," Kagome hid a yawn. "Sorry, I'm exhausted..."

"Yeah, clearly," Rin said eyeing upon her, "would you mind telling us where did you get that outfit? It looks gorgeous on you."

Kagome blushed. "Oh that...This dress was given to me earlier this afternoon..."

"Ohh, a gift! From whom?"

Kagome blushed even more.

"So you found a new guy, ehh?" Yuka asked, winking.

"Ehhehehe, guess so.." Kagome glanced at Kayade and Rin. "A guy called Hisakata Sesshoumaru gave it to me."

Their jaws dropped. Yuka was giggling, but Ayumi was frowning.

"Hisakata.. " her eyes widened. "Oh my gosh! Not the Hisakata who's the chief manager of the Soraji corp.?"

"The guy whose art exhibition I organised?" Yuka asked

"Rin-san's boss Hisakata?" Kayade gasped.

Rin just stared at her, her mouth still hanging open.

"Uhh, yeah, that's the guy," Kagome replied feeling a tad bit uneasy.

"Oh my gosh!"

"So, did you guys have a date or something?" Ayumi inquired, smiling.

Kagome's face was flushed even redder.

"No! No! It was a mere dinner..." her voice trailed off.

"Just a dinner, huh?" Kayade asked mischievously, one eyebrow raised.

Kagome stared at the floor.

"Just one dinner of Italian food – in Milan."

The other four women shrieked at the same time.

"Milan?"

"He took you out to ITALY?"

"My gosh!"  
"No wonder you look so exhausted."

And Kagome found herself once more to be hugged from many directions at the same time.

"We want to hear all the details," Yuka breathed out.

"Indeed we do, the dirty ones especially," Kayade winked.

"Kayade!" Kagome blushed slightly. "It was not like that it was just a dinner. Well.. The restaurant was unlike any I have ever been in before. The food was heavenly and the mood was just incredible. But Gosh I was just so confused!"

"Why?"

"Well, no matter how fine it all was, it still was Hisakata-sama who was sitting on the opposite side of the table and I just felt a bit disturbed. Like I didn't belong there. I really didn't know what to think, I mean.. Why was _he_ treating me a dinner at all?"

Kagome glanced in secret at Rin and Kayade.

She allowed the feelings and thoughts she had had earlier that evening pool over her mind once more. If it had been his demon side, Kagome would have fully understood that his intention would be winning her back. Wait, she never had agreed to anything, right? She had NOT fallen for him, right? So, he wouldn't be winning her _back_ but winning her over. But it wasn't his inner demon. So, what the heck was he up to?

It couldn't be...

If Sesshoumaru had finally agreed with his inner demon...? If Sesshoumaru too wanted her to be his mate?

Kagome felt her cheeks flush.

"Are you all right?" Ayumi ask worriedly.

"Yes, everything's fine. Just fine."

"So, was he nice and sweet? Considerate? A perfect gentleman?" Ayumi asked.

Kayade bit her lip not to laugh.

Rin chuckled quietly and Yuka raised her eyebrow.

Kagome was taken aback of the question.

Sesshoumaru nice and sweet? Yeah right. The day that would happen would mean that the end was drawing near. Considerate? Hell no... But..

"Oh... He was a gentleman."

Kayade nearly fell on the floor.

"Well, enough of me already," Kagome said, waving her hand.

"Oh, no, not yet enough," Yuka smiled.

"I'm sorry to bring this up but I really need to know," Ayumi said.

"Huh? Go on.."

"Narita Ken.. Were you really… seeing him?"

Kagome startled.

"No, no.. It wasn't.. I wasn't.. Gosh you thought so too?"

"Well it was all over the papers."

"... And the manager said in the interview that you were getting engaged.."

Rin coughed silently at this point.

"Oh, did she, now?" Kagome said dryly and looked at the suddenly scarlet-faced secretary. "I don't know where she got that idea... But well, I can assure you that Narita Ken was nothing but an old friend of mine."

"Did you kiss? Like was said in the article?"

"Well.." Kagome blushed. "Yes."

Yuka and Ayumi stared at her bewildered.

"But it was only to save him from all the pushy fangirls!"

"Ahh..."  
"Okay..."

"So uh... how're you all doing?"

* * *

Much chatting, many ice cream portions, one movie, uncountable amount of hugs and several glasses of soda later Kagome was lying on her sofa, her cat Shue curled up in her lap. She had changed her clothes and was now petting her cat, feeling thoroughly exhausted. She waited for the water to boil so she could have a cup of camomile tea before going to bed. She couldn't remember when she last had felt herself so tired but luckily tomorrow was Sunday. No work... Maybe she'd just spend the whole day in bed..

_She was lying on her back in the field full of wild-flowers. Smiling to herself she watched the white clouds drift onward on the sweet blue sky. There was nothing worrying her at that moment. Inuyasha had gone to see Totosai about Tetsusaiga, Sango and Miroku were elsewhere, also keeping an eye on Shippo.. She was grateful to her friends. They had seen her desire to have a little break, some time for just herself. And that was why she had ended up on this field full of beautiful flowers, their mild scents were caressing her senses and she felt, finally for a long time, that it was easy for her to smile. She should write about this later into her diary.. _

"_Look, Sesshoumaru-sama! Rin sees pretty flowers!" _

_The voice was bright and it obviously belonged to a child. Why would Sesshoumaru be with a child?_

_Kagome slightly raised her head. On the edge of the woods, where the field of flowers began, __were standing two figures. One was that of an adult demon, his silver hair whirling around him in the soft wind. The other was a small smiling human girl with black hair._

_The girl giggled and ran to pick up some wildflowers. Kagome watched them from her hiding place among the long white lilies. The girl twirled happily around on the field, holding flowers in her hands. The demon lord stood on the edge of the field, keeping a close eye on the girl. __He was smiling. _

* * *

'Shit, shit, shit!' Kagome cried in her mind as she was hastily dressing herself. She wouldn't even have time for breakfast.

Why hadn't the alarm-clock woken her up? Well, it was too late to cry over it now... She should have been at her workplace an hour and half ago!

'Shit!' she cursed once again and pulled the hairbrush through her locks with rushing motions.

'Maybe Shaere will allow me to use the kitchen and the food supplies to make myself a sandwich since I skipped breakfast... Oh no, Shaere-san! She'll be furious! I'll get scolded of leaving her and Kayade-chan in trouble. It'll be a disaster, oh no...'

Kagome swiftly pulled shoes on and grabbed her coat from the rack. After casting a final glance at her fattish cat which was peacefully sleeping on her sofa Kagome muttered jealously "bastard" under her breath and left to work.

* * *

Kagome gulped and then gathered herself. She opened the door of the restaurant and stepped in.

Instead of a stressed yell of "Where the hell have you been, lazy girl!" she was greeted by Kayade's bright "Good morning, Kagome-chan!"

"Ehh.. Good morning. Sorry for being so late but – "

"It's okay, Takeo-chan covered for you."

"Takeo...chan...?"

Kayade giggled.

"Go already and change, you'll be behind the counter today!"

"I.. uhh.. okay.."

Kagome walked into the staff room. There she changed her jeans into her waitress' dress, tied her hair up on a high ponytail and spent a few criticizing seconds looking in to the mirror.

That had to do.

Kagome knocked on the kitchen door.

"Come in, dear."

Kagome opened the door and stepped into the kitchen.

"I'm so sorry for being this late," she said, bowing deep. "I overslept and – "

"It's fine, dear," Shaere-san cut in smiling. "Here, we have a new employee who just started this morning. Tsugiyama Takeo-kun, here is my niece Higurashi Kagome-chan."

She spotted the guy for the first time.

"A pleasure to meet you, Kagome-chan," he smiled and bowed.

Kagome's jaw dropped. She could but stare at the man standing in front of her.

"Uhh.. Hi there, Takeo-san." Kagome flashed an uncertain, nervous smile after a while of staring.

He just smiled back.

Kagome swallowed.

"Uh, so, I suppose I have to go to work now... bye."

The stunned small woman turned and left the kitchen.

She found Kayade, leaning against the counter, looking bored. There weren't so many customers, so there were not so much for her to do at the moment.

"Isn't he a great guy, that Takeo-chan?" Kayade asked as Kagome walked over to her.

"A great guy indeed," Kagome replied with a frown.

"So why did you come this late?" the blond girl inquired, curious.

"I overslept. Didn't wake up as the alarm-clock rang."

"Hehe, I see." Kayade flashed a smile. "Oh, that table needs cleaning..." the other waitress walked over to do her job.

Kagome was still a little sleepy. She decided that she was starting to imagine things. There wasn't any other explanation. That was the only option. Right.

Her thoughts wandered to the dream she had seen last night. Sesshoumaru. And a little girl. A girl whom she had seen before, in the painting Sesshoumaru had made, that had been up in his exhibition. That day when she had met Rin-chan for the first time. Funny really, the coincidence.

The girl in the dream had also been called Rin.

'Coincidence. Can I really believe in coincidences anymore? This all starts to look like some sick conspiracy of fate,' she thought to herself sarcastically.


	15. To where you are

**Disclaimer: **... You ought to know by now that I don't write this story to get moneyz and that I know that I don't own the characters. Chapter title stolen from a song performed by Josh Groban

**Chie: **The OOC-warning is still on.

And yes, Kagome WILL get her memories back, eventually. And her mother/Souta/grandpa hasn't said anything about her time-travelling hobby because the seal affects them too. It was a very complicated spell and it needed several mikos to do it, but it kind of affected in the way that the moment Kagome's family saw her with her memories sealed, the spell "stretched out" to make them forget about the all too. Naturally, they will get their memories back, once the seal is broken...

**Chapter Fourteen – To where you are**

"You know, I think he's watching you."

"What?"

"Yeah! Every time I glance at him, his eyes are on you."

"Oh why me?"

"Don't be so negative. He's kinda cute and extremely nice! Why not give him a try?"

"You can't be serious."

"Or is this about Hisakata-sama?"

"Huh?"

"You fancy him, don't you?"

"I do not!"

"Then why don't you at least try to go out with Takeo-chan? He surely is better for you than Hisakata-sama."

Kagome laughed sarcastically.

"What?" Kayade asked.

"Never mind," Kagome replied and marched off.

* * *

"Good morning, Kagome-chan!"

"Good morning, Takeo-san."  
"You know, Kagome-chan, you have no need to be that formal towards me. You know, I already feel like I would know you very well."

"Oh do you now," Kagome replied barely masking her sarcastic tone.

"Yes." he smiled.

Kagome smiled.

"Fine, let's do it your way then, Takeo-_kun_."

"Thank you, sweetheart."

Kagome froze.

"Is something wrong?" Kayade asked.

"No... Everything's... fine."

"Good then!" Kayade flashed a smile.

The corner of Kagome's mouth twitched.

"Why me..." she muttered quietly.

"Huh, did you say something?"

"Nothing, Takeo-_kun_, nothing.."

* * *

"Kagome-chan!"

"Okay, Takeo-kun, please, could I have a word in private with you?"

"Sure sweetheart, anything for you baby."

Kayade giggled.

Kagome cast one glance at her friend and then grabbed Takeo's hand and dragged him to the backyard.

Once they were out, Kagome turned to face him and bowed down.

"I apologize for treating you so harshly."

"You have no need to apologize, sweetheart."

"Okay, enough with that!" she snapped. "Mind telling me what is the meaning of this?"

"Meaning of what, Kagome-chan?"

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about, demon."

"Don't you demon me, human."

They glared at each other.

Kagome smirked.

"As I thought. The whole sweetheart-thing is just an act."

He didn't reply.

"I would have never guessed that you'd have such acting skills. I'm almost impressed. But that's beside the point. Tell me, what are you up to, Hisakata-sama?"

"This Sesshoumaru is up to nothing."

"I might be just a human, but I'm not stupid."

"Well, that's news to me."

"You..." Kagome took a deep breath to calm herself.

"Nevermind," she hissed. "I don't even want to know."

She marched back in.

Takeo came back to the staff room and sat down beside Kayade.

"So, what did you talk about?" she inquired.

"It seems like Kagome-chan is suspecting that I'm trying something."

"Well, are you?"

"Maybe..."

Kayade smirked.

"Well, don't give up too easily, Takeo-chan. If you ask me, Kagome-chan really needs a man in her life – one that is good enough for her, of course."

* * *

"I just don't get him!" Kagome announced as she marched in.

"Ka-Kagome-nee-chan? What a surprise." Rin got up to greet her. "What is it now?"

"Takeo-kun... Or Hisakata-sama if you prefer. Now when he has showed up in the restaurant I can't deny that the workdays wouldn't have become more lively but..."

Rin bit her lip.  
"Please sit, Kagome-nee-chan," she requested while taking a seat herself.

"Thank you," Kagome flashed a quick smile as she settled herself on the chair in front of Rin's desk.

"Anyway as I was saying... He's driving me crazy."  
"Awww... I'm sorry."

"Huh?" Kagome shot Rin with a puzzled look. "You don't have to apologize, Rin-chan, it's not like you had anything to do with it."

"Well... Actually.." Rin flashed an apologetic smile.

Kagome raised her eyebrow.

"What do you mean 'actually'?"

"It was me who persuaded Higurashi-san to give Sesshoumaru-sama that job. I'm sorry," Rin hurried to say as she saw Kagome's expression. "It was just that he came to ask me for a job where he could see you as much as possible," she shrugged. "And I had heard from Ka-chan that Higurashi-san was looking for a new staff-member... I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I don't blame you, really," Kagome smiled meekly. "It's just... He's driving me crazy. I'm getting paranoid. I'm sure he is up to something, he has to be. The way he has behaved recently is just so... so not like him, you know what I mean?"

"Uhh, I really haven't spotted any difference."

"Is it just me then? Am I finally starting to imagine things?"

"Ehh, I don't think that's it either."

"Or is it just me... Is he acting all weird just around me? Is he doing this on purpose? Trying to confuse me and make me paranoid? Because if that is the goal, he's doing a very good job at it."

"What is he doing then?"

"He is being NICE! And he's calling me Kagome-chan OR sweetheart, imagine that!"

".. You're kidding me, right?"

"I wish I were," Kagome muttered to herself.

Rin shook her head. "What's gotten into him?"

"And here I thought you could tell that to me!"

They both sighed at the same time.

"Oh, and he even doesn't seem to mind when Kayade-chan calls him 'Takeo-chan'..."

The door opened.

"WHERE THE HELL IS HE!"

"Good afternoon to you too, Takane-san," Rin replied wearily.

"There's nothing good in this! He's been away for a week AGAIN! Damn that man, he's totally hopeless..."

"I'm afraid I have to disagree with that, Takane-san. I doubt that a 'totally hopeless' person would have been able to build up Soraji corp. out of nothing."

"Well, yes... But that's not the point!"

Rin smiled calmly. Inwards she was sighing heavily and rolling her eyes. How had such a man ended up being the vice-president? Surely he was talented and very good at organisation, but.. But!

"Oh. I believe you two haven't met yet."

It was then when the tall dark-haired man noticed there was someone else in the room too. He looked down at the black-haired, blinking woman who was sitting on the comfortable chair.

"Here's Takane Seyo who is the vice-president of the Soraji corp."

Kagome quickly got up so she could bow down.

"Pleasure to meet you, Takane-san."

"And she's Higurashi Kagome who is Sesshoumaru-sama's girlfriend."

"What?" Takane-san gasped and looked Kagome with a new interest.

"What?" Kagome hissed and turned to glare Rin.

Rin winked at her and grinned.

"My my... Is that so, indeed?" Takane-san wondered out loud as he was examining Kagome with his calculating gaze.

Was it fate, fortune – or misfortune – or a sheer coincidence, nobody knew. But the fact was that exactly on that moment Hisakata Sesshoumaru walked in the room being dressed up in impeccable clothes and well, being so himself as just he just could be.

"Hisakata-san!" Takane-san shouted at the sight of him. For a blink of an eye Rin thought she saw a teardrop of joy in the corner of his eye.

Kagome's head turned very swiftly as she heard his name being called and gawked at the demon.

"Well well... What kind of meeting is this?" he asked lazily, one silver eyebrow raised.

"My, Hisakata-san, Miyame-san just told me about this charming young woman..."

Sesshoumaru looked at the miko, who had just completely frozen up and had no idea whether she should just run or... Kagome hoped that the ground would just swallow her then and there.

"Why haven't you told me that you have a girlfriend?"

'Well well Rin, just _what_ have you told him?' Sesshoumaru thought to himself.

At Takane-san's words Kagome's cheeks had flushed scarlet.

Sesshoumaru calmly walked over to Kagome and pulled the thoroughly confused and stunned little woman into his arms. Then he directed his gaze into Takane.

"That is because we haven't been going out for so long yet..." then he turned his head to look at Kagome. "But I must say I've missed you, darling." He bent down to place a quick soft kiss on her forehead.

This action caused Takane to chuckle knowingly, Rin to squeal excitedly and Kagome to – if just possible – blush even redder.

Sesshoumaru didn't even seem to notice.

"Well then, darling, let's go."

The two walked into Sesshoumaru's office.

The moment the door closed behind them, Kagome struggled out of Sesshoumaru's arms.

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

"The whole 'missed you darling' – act?"

"What do you think it was?" Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow. "I reckon that that means I missed you."

Kagome blinked.

"Okay..? What are you up to now?"  
"What makes you to think that I would be up to something now or ever?" he asked raising his eyebrow again.

"Argh! Do you have to answer my questions with questions? Do you have to be so – "

"Annoying? Yes, I'm afraid that I do. Learn to deal with it."

"Why should I?"

"I don't care whether you really do learn it or not. It'll just be easier for you if you do. But no one can ever tell what you stupid humans decide to do..."

Kagome fought very hard to keep herself calm. Unfortunately she was badly shaken by his next comment.

"Oh, and you will come over to my apartment tonight."

"What?"

"I said that we have a date, my darling. Seven o'clock. Don't be late."

Kagome just stared at him. Honestly, that guy... But, what could she really say to that?

"Off you go then, I have work to do," he said, dismissing her.

* * *

She seriously thought about not going. Why should she be going over to his place? "He told me to" – was not enough of a reason. But like nearly always in the end, the curiosity won. And thus Kagome found herself behind his door, ten minutes to seven. She seriously wondered though what had gotten into her. But more than that she wanted to find out what had got into _him_ and so –

"Good evening. Come in."

Kagome looked at the silver-haired youkai who had just opened the door. She hadn't yet even knocked – but well, he was a demon after all... She stepped in.

He was casually dressed in blue jeans and a white sweater. Kagome actually had to hold back her breath, he looked gorgeous.

Kagome followed him into the dining-room. The table was set for two. The dinner itself looked magnificent, two long white candles were lit and everything in the scene was just perfect. Everything was perfect but..

'Everything but me,' Kagome thought bitterly. 'I don't belong here, why did I even come? What does he want of me?'

"Sit down," Sesshoumaru said.

Kagome did as he told for it had sounded more of a command than a suggestion. She sighed.

"Is something wrong?" he asked, frowning.

"No, everything's fine."

"Human, do not underestimate this Sesshoumaru. I can tell that you are lying."

"Well maybe, demon, the fact that I'm lying means that whatever it is that bothers me is nothing for you to worry about."

"Do not 'demon' me, human."

"Then don't 'human' me, demon."

They glared at each other for awhile 'til Kagome turned her gaze to her yet empty plate.

"And this Sesshoumaru was not worrying," she heard him mutter sulkily in a low tone.

'Certainly you weren't,' Kagome thought to herself, 'I mean, why you even bothered to ask? Clearly you don't care.'

"Help yourself," he requested smiling slightly.

Kagome raised her eyebrow. What was it, few minutes ago he had been glaring her and now he was smiling and friendly making requests instead of bossing her around. Kagome didn't voice aloud her suspicions and confusion but really helped herself.

It tasted heavenly. Far better than anything she had tasted in the restaurants.

"My gosh, this is delicious!"

"But of course. After all I made it."

Most of the dinner went in silence but Sesshoumaru – unlike Kagome – didn't seem to consider it awkward.

That guy... Kagome couldn't understand him at all. Sometimes he was so arrogant that she just couldn't stand being near him – his ego would have crushed her very quickly anyway - and then again sometimes... Sometimes he seemed to be almost humane. Unfortunately the last happened very rarely. But, that proved something.

"You know I'm curious," Kagome said breaking the silence. "Why do you keep up this facade?"

Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow.

"What do you mean?"

"This all act of ice-cold mighty demon lord who despises everyone and has no heart."

Sesshoumaru just stared at her.

"I know that no one can be that bad," Kagome smiled.

* * *

"I had a date with him again last evening." Kagome mumbled.

"What? What did you do then?" Rin asked excitedly.

"He had made us a dinner. There were candles and all. Had it not been him sitting at the table, the mood would've been very romantic."

"What did he do?"

"Oh, nothing. He was kind of confusing... First glaring me and after that again smiling and being polite and so all of sudden."

"Did you have fun?"

"Well, I had more fun I thought I would have." Kagome frowned. "The food was truly delicious. And after the dinner we watched a movie."

"Ohh?" Sesshoumaru watching a movie? Rin suppressed a giggle. "Which movie was it?"

"'Mr. and Mrs. Smith' or something like that..."

"Oh my... really?"

"Yeah. The movie was great though I can't imagine why he chose such a film."

"Me neither," Rin replied and shook her head.

"Why is he being like that?" Kagome asked a hint of desperation in her voice.

"Being like what?" Rin asked confused.

"You know... the 'I'm a heartless ice prince and better than you all' – act..."

"So you see through it as well?" Rin asked, smiling.

"Not exactly, but I can tell it's not who he truly is. All he replied when I asked him about it was 'Hmph.'..."

Rin giggled.

"I do not know why. He has never told me and I have not dared to ask. But I believe it's his way of protecting himself. Of what, I do not know."

"Hmm, yeah.."

"Oh, look the time. I'm truly sorry, Kagome-nee-chan, but I really have to go now."

"It's all right, I took a lot of your time, sorry."

"Don't apologize, I'm glad you called."

"Bye then, Rin-chan."

"Bye."

"Damn that was one long phone call," he chuckled.

"Oh shush, Hitachi," Rin said.

"So, what did you and Kagome-san talk about?"

"Sesshoumaru-sama. They had a date last night."

"They did?"

"Yeah... I'm happy he's doing this. I believe Kagome-nee-chan is able to get through his barriers – What is it, sweetheart?" Rin had suddenly nodded her husband's darkened expression.

"Nothing," he replied hastily and smiled.

"You know... A week ago when we were visiting Kagome, I happened to notice something in the space between the wall and the bookshelf she had... It was her diary."

"What did you do?"

"I took it with me."

"Rin!"

"But...! It would be terrible if she'd have the diary to herself. You know, I didn't read it, but I still had a little peek in it. First word that caught my eye was 'Inuyasha'. Do you understand what it would mean to her, Hitachi, had she read the book... Better that one of us has it. I can hand it back to her. If the seal will ever break that is."

Hitachi nodded.

"Well.. I'll be off now. I'll be back later."

"All right. Say hi to your friends for me."

"I will."

* * *

Sesshoumaru opened the door.

"Hitachi. Come in."

He didn't seem to be surprised to find the cat demon behind his door. Though, he hardly ever seemed to be surprised.

Hitachi stepped in and followed the dog demon into his living room.

"What is it that you wish to discuss," Sesshoumaru calmly asked after they had seated themselves.

"I want to talk to you about your current behaviour."

"My current behaviour?" Sesshoumaru asked raising his silver eyebrow.

"Yes. I think it's rather cruel to play around like that."

"I do not know what you are talking about, Hitachi."

"Oh, but I believe that you do know, Sesshoumaru-sama."

"Explain."

"The miko, Sesshoumaru-sama. I'm talking about Kagome-san and I have to say I don't approve of what you are doing with her."

"Since when have I needed your permission to court someone?"

"If it would be just about courting I wouldn't mind – besides, would you truly wish to take her as your mate you'd need my approval too... But that's not the point. What I dislike is the fact that you're only playing with her."  
A sly smile rose to Sesshoumaru's lips.

"I don't know what you're planning, nor why, but that I know: Whatever it is, she will suffer from it. Can't you really feel anything with that icy heart of yours? That girl has suffered enough."

Sesshoumaru didn't reply.

"Just know this, Lord of the Western lands, the moment you even think of going too far, I shall stop you. And I can assure you that Rin and Kouga will be standing by my side then."

"I acknowledge your warning, Lord of the southern lands." Sesshoumaru replied then calmly, inclining his head. "Was that all?"

Hitachi eyed at him.

"Yes, that was all."

The blond-haired cat demon got up and bowed his head. Then he walked away.

* * *

"Sesshoumaru-sama."

"What is it, Rin?"

"I.. I have something..."

"Yes?"

"Here."

From her purse she took out a notebook which covers where blue of their colour. Without a word she set her hand forward offering the notebook to him.

The taiyoukai took it. Sesshoumaru stared at the notebook.

"I thought you should have it."

The demon lord gazed at the woman in front of him and then he turned once again to look at the book he was holding.

"And what is this?"

"This.. This is a diary," Rin replied and turned to leave.

Sesshoumaru frowned and opened the notebook. On the first white page was written on blue gel-pen the words: "This diary belongs to Higurashi Kagome"

Sesshoumaru raised his head and looked straight into Rin's eyes.

"Why?"

"It must not be at her own hands. It's from the time before her memories got sealed. That is her true self speaking in that book."

"But why are you giving it to me?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"Because I know you need it more than I do." Rin flashed a little smile and nodded politely. With a swish of raven black hair she had turned around and walked away.

Sesshoumaru watched her disappearing form and then glanced again the notebook that was still clutched in his hands.

He had no idea why he did it - but supposedly it did not matter why.

He sat down on the sofa, opened the little book and started to read.


	16. The shadow of the past

**Disclaimer: **Not mine and never will be. No making money and never will be… the title I got from a song that can be found from Lord of the Rings – Fellowship of the Ring soundtrack (track 3, if I remember right...) :)

**Chapter fifteen – The shadow of the p****ast**

He was leafing through the blue-covered diary. The handwriting was slender and easy to read. It was all written on blue or black gel-pen. The bit he was reading now was dated little over four years ago.

"_-- He's a selfish, annoying jerk! He only thinks about himself and hunting down Naraku. I should get back home, I have few more tests coming up. Sango-chan and Miroku-sama are tired too of the constant running around after that filthy hanyou Naraku. But he won't listen to our words. I want to get home soon... I feel like it would have been ages since I last was at home. --"_

Mostly it was just that, complaining about Inuyasha. It felt like Inuyasha would have been the main theme of the whole diary. He felt a little twinge in his heart.

'You know... You shouldn't be doing this.'

'Oh, it's you again,' Sesshoumaru replied to his inner demon in a bored tone.

'These matters are truly private to her. She would wish to keep them as they are. She wouldn't want you to read this diary.'

'Too bad for her, hence I'm reading it.'

'You're going to use it against her, aren't you?'

'Of course I'm not. I have my honour.'

'Indeed, honour in reading a book that's meant for no one to see.'

'...'

'Why do you read it then, if not using it against her?'

It was a good question. Why was he reading the miko's diary?

Because you're curious, the little honest voice replied.

No. That couldn't be the answer.

With a soft "meow" Sesshoumaru was brought back to Earth. Kirara was sitting in front of him, her head askew.

"Nothing's wrong."

"Meow."

"Come here."

The little demon-cat jumped up and took a comfortable position in his lap. Sesshoumaru smiled quietly to himself and put the diary aside. He would think about it later.

* * *

His eyes were on her all the time. It was really freaky. The guy was dressed neatly, he was wearing a black suit and glasses. He had short black hair and very intense gaze. Kagome started to really feel uncomfortable. His brown eyes seemed to register every single move she made. Kagome squeezed the handle of the tea-pot so tightly that her knuckles were all white. She forced a sweet smile on her face.

She reached his table and filled his empty cup with tea.

"There you go sir," she said flashing a smile.

He stared her in the eye as he said his thanks.

When Kagome was turning away, the man suddenly grabbed her wrist.

"What is it, sir?" she asked, puzzled.

"Excuse me. I was just wondering... That if it would be possible.. Maybe..."

"Yes?"

"I... I was just wondering what's your name?"

Sesshoumaru watched the scene standing behind the counter. He knew who that man was. It was the same business partner with whom he had once had lunch in this very restaurant, the same guy who had concentrated on watching the miko rather than listening to his suggestions. Was he trying something? Sesshoumaru didn't like the way that man's eyes were always on the miko. He straightened himself.

"I am –" Kagome's words were cut in a little gasp. An arm had just wrapped itself around her waist.

"Sweetie, I need you for a minute."

"- Higurashi Kagome," the black-haired girl answered.

With an apologetic smile to the persistent customer Kagome allowed Sesshoumaru walk her off. They both disappeared behind the door leading to staff's room.

"Phew," Kagome breathed out the air she didn't even know she had been holding.

She was more relieved than she had thought to be now that she did not have to be under his constant gaze anymore. But no matter how relieved she felt, something still felt wrong... Something...

A blush slowly rose on her cheeks as she realised that Sesshoumaru's arm was still wrapped around her waist.

"Thank you, Hisakata-sama. That guy really gave me creeps."

"Yorukawa Rennosuke."

"Huh? You know that guy?"

"I once lunched with him here, we were supposed to have a lunch where to talk about business matters. But you were the only one getting his attention."

Under the intense gaze of his amber eyes Kagome's blush but deepened.

"Uhh... Could you... Remove your hand please?"

"Does its current location trouble you?" he asked as he raised one silver eyebrow.

"Well, not exactly, but.."

"Then good," he declared, not moving his arm.

Kagome just stared at the ground. Why was he being like this now? He really had seen trouble for saving her, noticing her in an awkward situation...

Or had it bothered even him? Had he felt jealous of the attention she had got from that guy?

Kagome didn't know the true reasons. But the result was here: They were standing in the small dimly lit room just by the two of them, quite close to each other. Sesshoumaru's arm was gently resting on her waist, like it would be the most natural thing in the whole world...

Kagome side-glanced Sesshoumaru only to find that those glowing golden orbs of his were gazing at her. She turned hastily her head aside. She knew he was Takeo-chan for everyone else in the restaurant but she knew the truth. She saw his true self.

"Look at me," he called quietly but firmly.

Kagome complied and turned back to watch him. Gold locked with brown.

"Are you afraid of me?" he asked frowning.

"Maybe... A bit."

"Why?"

"Because I don't understand you. And you're a demon, you're dangerous and you could kill me in a blink of an eye..."

"If I wanted to kill you," he replied slowly, "I would have done so a long, _long_ time ago."

Silence fell upon them as they continued staying close to one another, their gazes locked.

What was it in her that influenced him like this?

Kagome's heart leaped as she noticed his bright eyes starting to turn red. Her heart started to beat faster as she watched him bending his head down, moving closer to her...

When their faces were just mere inches away, Sesshoumaru's eyes flashed. They were again golden. He was once again himself.

Kagome's heart pounded hard against her ribcage. What would he do now? Being himself and finding himself suddenly so close to her... Would he throw her away? Would he just turn around and leave? Would he...

Sesshoumaru leaned in, closing their short distance. His soft lips found hers. The kiss took her by a total surprise. Why was he doing this? He was being himself. Never before had he actually kissed her when not being controlled by his demon self. Kagome's mind was in turmoil.

But then she closed her eyes and was lost in the moment as she felt his tongue sweetly tracing her lower lip. His arms moved to embrace her, pulling her even closer to his body. The kiss deepened, his tongue slipped into her mouth when she automatically responded opening her lips. His tongue wandered in her mouth, playfully nudging her tongue.

The door opened and they both heard a muffled gasp. The kiss was broken as they both hastily turned to look upon their interrupter.

They met bright green widened eyes.

"Oh, sorry!" squealed Kayade and slammed the door shut.

They were once again standing in the dim room just by the two of them. An awkward silence fell upon them.

"Well," Kagome said meekly as she turned away and took some steps towards the now closed door, "I think we should probably already get – "

She fell back against him due the powerful tug on her hand. Sesshoumaru's arms were again wrapping around her, imprisoning her efficiently against his form. And Kagome soon found her mouth being occupied. His tongue slipped into her mouth and challenged hers. Eventually he won their little battle Kagome felt weak on her knees and she would surely have fallen to the ground had not his arms been holding her and keeping her up.

The kiss finally broke and Kagome's head fell to rest against Sesshoumaru's broad shoulder. She breathed heavily, trying to get some air for she had forgotten to breathe during that kiss. Sesshoumaru still held her in his arms.

He spoke nothing to her for the rest of the day and never bothered to explain his sudden gestures – which of course made Kagome even more confused. For the rest of the day he was as ignorant towards her as always. Like they would never had ended up into that room together, like he never had kissed her so fiercely...

* * *

"Look, I'm really sorry I walked up on you two... I had no idea that you two could.. That you could.. wow."

"It's all right Kayade-chan," Kagome reassured, blushing furiously at the memory.

"So... When did you change your mind? I think you just said you don't like Takeo-chan that much."

"Well what happened really wasn't planned. It all just sort of.. happened.."

"Ahh.. I see."

For a moment or two Kayade examined Kagome with her gaze.

"What about Hisakata-sama then?"

"Huh?"

"He wouldn't be too happy to hear that you were just making out with your fellow worker."

Kagome bit her lip.

"I don't know what he would think about it..."

A mischievous smile had risen on Kayade's lips.

"So... Did you enjoy it?"

"Umm... Yes, I guess I did," Kagome answered blushing again.

Kayade giggled.

"I'm happy for you two."

'If you only knew...' Kagome muttered in her thoughts.

* * *

Had Sesshoumaru not known that he was far above such a petty feeling as fear, he might have said he was a bit afraid of the reaction the miko had caused in him. He had no idea how he had ended up kissing her. Suddenly they had just been so close and... And he hadn't been thinking, he had just went on and kissed her. It was not like him. He always carefully considered every possible aspect before he acted... Then why? Why had he cast off any possible thought and...

There just _had to be _a valid explanation... Hmm. Probably it all was that Yorukawa-guy's fault. His intense interest in the miko had stirred some ancient feelings inside him that had affected his actions even though his inner demon had been firmly under his control. Some kind of an urge to prove and show this was the woman _he_ was courting. A gesture to make the woman forget all about the other males. Yes. That had to be it. After all it was true; he was courting the miko and would not allow anyone to meddle in his plans.

... That was probably why he yearned to kiss her again.

He sighed to himself. What was the spell the miko had put on him? This wasn't how he usually behaved. There was something about her...

He did not like it. It felt as if he was not in a total control of himself.

'Are you starting to understand my point of view?' the inner demon quietly inquired.

'Hmph. I'm simply wondering why I reacted so strongly.'

'Well, let's face it pal, it has been quite a while since you last time were courting someone. You're lust has been sleeping for a long time... If someone knows that it is I.'

'Nonsense. I do not lust after a petty human bitch.'

'Well of course you do not,' the inner demon complied sarcastically. 'You just crave for her for fun.'

Sesshoumaru shut the annoying voice out of his head and picked up the miko's old diary. He opened the notebook from where he had left.

* * *

Kagome didn't feel sick in the mornings anymore. She had gone to see a doctor and had had the typical check-up. Everything seemed to be fine, the embryo was healthy – and luckily it had not been spotted that it wasn't fully a human. Kagome felt finally at peace as she cleaned the empty table after the restaurant had been closed. Yes... Everything was fine, except –

"Ohh how I want some strawberries right now."

"Huh? What was that, Kagome-chan?" Kayde asked turning to look at her friend.

"I want strawberries," Kagome repeated.

Kayade frowned.

"Why?"

"I don't know... Just suddenly it hit me... irresistible crave for strawberries..."

Kayade started to giggle.

"You know, I think I know what it is."

"Ohh?"

"Yeah, after all I have three younger siblings... My mother always wanted peaches when she was pregnant."

Kagome flashed a faint smile.

"Does is scare you?" Kayade asked sharply, reading the feelings written on the miko's face.

"A bit. I mean.. I don't know what kind of a future this child will have.."

Kayade walked over to her and hugged her tight.

"Do not worry, Kagome-chan. I'll be always there for you. And so will be others. You shouldn't be afraid. You're not alone."

Kagome smiled and wiped out one single tear from the corner of her eye. Had it appeared there out of fear, sorrow or gratitude, she couldn't tell.

"Thank you, Kayade-chan."

* * *

Kagome was peacefully resting on her sofa, watching TV, when the doorbell rang. She got up and walked over to open the door. She was met by a bouquet of red roses.

"Are you Higurashi Kagome-san?" the delivery guy asked.

"Uhm.. Yes?"

"Good, these are for you then. Sign here please..."

Kagome signed the delivery document and then took the flowers.

"Thank you."

"Good day!"

She closed the door and looked at the flowers in awe. There weren't too many possibilities of who could have been the sender...

She noticed a card among the roses and picked it in her hands and opened it.

"_For Higurashi Kagome who caught my eye the moment I saw her,_

_I want thus to announce that I have grown__ quite fond of you in case you could not have noticed that already. I know that these flowers are a rather petty way to show you my adoration towards you but I suppose that they're better than nothing – although they look pale against your wondrous beauty._

_Yours,_

_Yorukawa Rennosuke."_

Kagome's hands started to shake and the card fell on the floor. She looked back at the roses, her face now pale and eyes wide.

"What is it?" calm, collected and nonchalant voice questioned.

Kagome turned her head and gazed at the demon lord.

"The Yorukawa-guy. He.. He sent me flowers."

Kagome could have sworn she heard him growl.

"And... Here's the card he wrote."

Sesshoumaru looked at the white piece of paper the miko had picked up from the floor and was now offering to him. He took it and read it through.

This time she was sure that had growled. The card fell on the floor again, this time in ripped pieces.

She yelped as she was suddenly pulled into his arms. With his long finger he lifted up her chin and for awhile her confused brown eyes stared into his burning amber ones. And then his lips were once again glued on hers. He scooped her up in his arms not breaking the kiss. She moaned softly into his mouth, waking a response in Sesshoumaru's mind.

Damn that Yorukawa-guy! He would show. _He_ was courting this miko. The woman belonged to him! He would prove it to her..

Inspired by these thoughts his kisses grew fiercer, more passionate..

They were halfway through her bedroom doorway, Kagome still up in his arms enjoying the feel of his tongue in her mouth when Seshoumaru suddenly froze and broke the kiss.

'What am I doing?'

'I'd say you're on your way to claim our mate.'

'Shit! Why would I do that?'

'I don't know, I have nothing to do with this.'

'What is this mysterious force that is controlling my actions?'

'I'd probably call it "lust" or maybe "passion", pal,' the inner demon noted dryly.

'Impossible! She's not even attractive, I mean, why would I –'

'You're still holding her,' his demon self noted.

Sesshoumaru coughed and let Kagome down. She blinked for awhile trying to clear her head and come back down to Earth. When she realized what had just been about to happen she blushed furiously.

'Every time he kisses me like that I lost my mind completely,' she thought. 'Those kisses are like a drug to me... Ohh, I just hope I don't get addicted... He's using some kind of a sly demonic power,' she muttered in her mind, 'I'm sure of it.'

'Damnit,' Sesshoumaru cursed to himself, 'she's using her spells on me again.'

"My apologies", he mumbled, not looking at her, his face once again wearing the emotionless mask.

"Wait... How did you get here?" Kagome asked sharply. Great. How come she had not realised to wonder that earlier? She hadn't questioned his being in her apartment at all. Just what was it about him? Maybe his presence influenced on her. Making her stupid.

"I used the door," Sesshoumaru stated, his appearance totally calm unlike the tumult going on inside him.

"So you didn't even bother to knock, did you?"

"Well the door was open," he shrugged.

"So... Why did you come in here in the first place? Or did you just want to, uhh.." her voice faded away and her gaze flew to stare at the floor. He noticed her cheeks were again reddened.

"I came to get you," he answered as he walked over to the entrance door.

"Oh?"

"Grab your coat, darling, we're leaving."

"But... umm... Where are we going?"

"To my place. Now come."

Kagome frowned but obeyed.

Once they were out on the street Kagome glanced at Sesshoumaru.

"So what now?"

"You speak too much, woman. Now we will walk."

"But why?"

"Because I feel like it. Ask no more questions."

He started to walk. His sharp ears caught her "Hmphm!" which was soon followed by soft footsteps behind him.

And they walked like that, in silence, Sesshoumaru leading the way and Kagome following close by.

* * *

"Sit in that chair. Take the book from the table and open it in your lap. Now, look out from the window."

Kagome did as she was told to and settled herself to a cosy position in the corner of the armchair.

Sesshoumaru gave a curt approving nod and then started to sketch her figure.

He had thought that maybe if he painted her down on canvas she would disappear from his thoughts. For he had been thinking about her a lot lately. And he didn't like it. It wasn't appropriate for him, the ruler of the Western Lands to be thinking about a human wench who once had been following his idiot half-brother.

The sketch was now ready and he reached for his acrylics. The pale delicate hand was holding the slender brush that danced on the canvas, bringing the sketch to life.

Kagome sat still, looking out of the window, a small smile grazing her lips. She hadn't been a model for a painting before. Knowing how talented Hisakata-sama was, she felt really honoured to be his model.

"Finished," he said nonchalantly and straightened himself.

Kagome stretched and got up. She walked over to the demon and look at the painting.

She gasped aloud. The girl in the painting was sitting in the chair like she had been sitting, she had an open book in her lap like she had had, she was looking out of the window smiling to herself like she had been doing... But still Kagome didn't recognise herself from the picture.

"Is... Is that really me in that painting?"

Kagome watched the piece of art in awe. The young woman in it was so beautiful, so pure and fragile and at the same time powerful. Although she was clearly a human, she felt as if there would be something more, a mysterious aura circled the woman in the painting.

Sesshoumaru's intense golden gaze fell on her.

"Yes, that is truly you."

Kagome blushed.

"It can't be. She's so beautiful."

Sesshoumaru didn't answer. It was true; the woman in the painting was beautiful. When Kagome had been sitting on that chair, when a small smile had risen on her lips, Sesshoumaru's eyes had widened and for a moment. For a moment he had seen someone else sitting there, someone else who had still been her. He had seen the ghost of the true miko, the one with whom he had encountered several times in the age of Sendoku Jidai. He did not know if the sudden vision had been just hallucination, provoked by the diary of the miko. For he had continued reading the diary, finding himself wanting to know more about the girl and her life, how had it been for her to travel along with his idiot brother, finding the Shikon shards..

And she was the one in the painting. The powerful miko who had not faltered even when facing him, the taiyoukai of the western lands.

Sesshoumaru's thoughts shattered abruptly as a pair of arms shyly snaked around his body, wrapping him in an embrace. Kagome buried her face in his chest and had he not been a demon, he wouldn't have heard the muffled mumbled thanks.

"I've missed you," he said in a raspy voice.

Now puzzled Kagome raised her head and met crimson eyes.

Well now, there he went again.

Sesshoumaru raised his long clawed finger and gently traced the side of Kagome's neck. Her eyes fell shut as a shiver danced along her spine. She felt his hot, wet tongue taste her skin, he licked her only once but it was a long lick, he started from her temple ending up at suckling lightly her collarbone. It sent new shivers down her spine and a moan escaped her mouth. The demon-Sesshoumaru smiled to himself and claimed her lips into ever so soft kiss, totally different from the passion-filled ones the other Sesshoumaru had been giving – but yet as intoxicating a kiss it was, making her yearn for more...

He broke the kiss. Kagome opened her eyes slightly and through half-closed lids she saw the gentle crimson eyes changing into a burning amber gaze. Sesshoumaru stared down on to her flushed face. Her smell wrapped itself all around him, it over poured him.

Taking the woman's face between his hands he latched his lips on hers. His tongue dipped into her mouth, and she moaned in response. His tongue dwelled in the sweet taste of her mouth as if it would want to stay there forever.

Mentally Sesshoumaru shook his head.

'I'm doing it again... I'M DOING IT AGAIN!'

He pulled quickly his head back, breaking the kiss and turned slightly away of the woman, breathing rather shallowly.

It had been happening again. Losing the control over to the strong yearning. Damn the miko! Damn the sweet scent of hers! It was all her fault!

The reddish haze in Kagome's mind started to fade away. Her still closed eyes shot open. She breathed heavily, in order trying to clear her head completely.

'He did it on you again,' she groaned in her mind. 'He once again swept your feet under you. Totally. Really, woman, what's your problem? All he has to touch you in a certain way and you will... And you will...' Kagome blushed at the sudden realisation. 'And you will feel desire for him. A desire for more.. Oh Kami!'

"I guess I should be going," Kagome said as she pulled away from him, her shocked voice squeaking a bit in the end. Her words met no response and Sesshoumaru didn't even turn his head to watch her go.

* * *

"Ohh... I'd give my right hand for a good bowl of grapes," Kagome announced to her blonde friend as they were cleaning the tables, only about ten minutes before opening the restaurant.

"Aha, grapes today, aren't it?" Kayade winked.

"I'd give _anything_ for some grapes."

"Anything?"

"Yeah, anything."

Kayade giggled.

"Oh, you poor thing."

Kagome dropped to sit on a chair.

"Grapes..." she mumbled.

Kayade giggled again as she walked over to her and sat down next to her.

For awhile they sat there, in a cosy silence, then, Kayade tilted her head.

She bent down closer to Kagome and inhaled.

"Wha- hey, what are you doing, Kayade-chan?"

"Nothing!" Kayade replied, pulling back hastily.

"Nothing? Ha! You were so sniffing me!"

"I was not! Why would I be sniffing you?"

"Yeah, why would you?"

Kayade "hpmhed" and got up. She turned to look at Kagome and rolled her eyes.

"You're imaging things, grape-craver."

As she was walking towards the kitchen a frown formed on her face. Well, wasn't this just curious. Very, very curious.

Why had Hisakata-sama's scent been all over Kagome-chan?


	17. Why me, why you

**Disclaimer: **I still do NOT own Inuyasha, I'm still making no money... Hmphm. Who reads these things anyway?

**Chapter Sixteen – Why me, why you**

"So tell me, Kagome-chan," Kayade asked with a slight frown on her brow, "did something happen between you and Hisakata-sama?"

"Huh?" Kagome raised her head. "Nothing really," she said, fighting to keep herself calm. Not knowing that her friend in a matter of fact was a demon, Kagome had no idea that her acting calm wouldn't convince Kayade. She smelled through her friend's petty lie.

"But you're kinda dating now, are you?"

"Yeah, well, you could call it that I suppose.." Kagome frowned.

"So... What about Takeo-chan then?" Kayade asked raising her eyebrow.

"Uhh, what about him?"  
"So why were you making out with him then – and enjoying it?"

"Umm.."  
"So which of them are you seeing now, Kagome-chan? Takeo-chan or Hisakata-sama?"

"Umm.." Kagome blushed. "Both of them." She hated herself for saying that. It made her sound cheap and deceiving... but what could she possibly say to Kayade? She couldn't blow off Hisakata-sama's cover, if he wished to be known as "Takeo-chan".

"Both! Ohh, Kagome-chan!"

Kagome watched at her friend, helplessness written clearly all over her face. Of course, Kayade didn't understand the true reasons of the helplessness but she thought it was due the problem of liking two guys at the same time.

"So, which of them do you prefer?"

"Umm.."

"This is impossible, Kagome-chan!" Kayade barked out heatedly.

"If Hisakata-sama ever finds out you're cheating on him he'll kill you AND Takeo-chan for sure..."

Kagome still answered nothing, merely shifted on her seat uncomfortably.

"And how can you do such a thing to Takeo-chan? He's such a sweet guy... You're breaking his heart, Kagome."

"Kayade-chan. Look. It's not what it seems to be… I… Argh, I really can't explain it to you now, okay? But I can assure you that if Takeo-chan and Hisakata-sama would ever find out about each other, they'd get along."

Kayade raised a very, very doubtful brow at that.

"Somehow I find that highly difficult to believe."

"I know it sound impossible but please, Kayade-chan.. Trust me. I know what I'm doing."

'Well, at least I think I know,' she added in her thoughts.

Kayade sighed.

"Very well then..."

The two did not speak about the subject anymore after that. Although Kagome could have sworn that she saw Kayade roll her eyes and mutter something to herself, sounding like "I can't believe how you always succeed in getting yourself in such a mess".

* * *

They were having a lunch-break. Sesshoumaru and Kagome were sitting side-to-side in the cool winter air. The sun was shining though and it was warming the legs that Kagome's skirt left bare. Neither of them spoke anything, for they both were deep in their thoughts.

She absentmindedly studied her lunch. It was some tasty sandwiches Shaere-san had kindly made on a quieter hour. Therefore it was a pity that she didn't feel like eating at all. A sheer thought of eating made her stomach twist painfully and caused the waves of nausea run through her.

"You are not eating," Sesshoumaru pointed out.

"I'm not hungry."

"Hungry or not you should eat."

"I don't want to."

"Eat it, wench, or I shall force it down your throat," he snarled.

Kagome turned her head, her hazel eyes flaming she glared the taiyoukai.

"Why do you care! It would be just better for you if I'd starve, right?" she retorted. "All your problems would vanish with me, I'm a stain in your oh-so-perfect life, am I not?"

Sesshoumaru gazed at her coldly.

"I was only thinking the well being of your pup."

But his words only upset her more.

"_My_ pup! Indeed. Don't pretend that you care. You're ice throughout," she rose and spared him one final glance full of despite.

Sesshoumaru watched her go and mentally sighed. Mood-swings. His thoughts wandered to a distant memory...

"_My dear, you really should eat."_

"_I'll pass this time, Inutaisho. Even the faintest smell of food makes me sick."_

"_Izayoi. Please eat." Inutaisho reached and placed his hand on Izayoi's belly._

"_For our pup, Izayoi."_

_She raised her head and looked into his eyes. Inutaisho picked up his chopsticks and started to feed her. Young Sesshoumaru turned away in disgust._

Yes, he had experienced it before, a woman carrying a hanyou pup. But still, this time was totally different. This time he could not turn his head and look away no matter how disgusted he would feel. He had lately been pondering the situation. He could deny it thousands of times and yet in truth it would still be his responsibility. He could blame it all on his inner demon or on the wench... But eventually the little, annoying voice of truth would reach his ear and remind him that it had been his choice to go drinking that night, he had given up the control without fighting. He was as responsible for the current situation as the other two.

He got up.

Sesshoumaru found the miko in the staff room. He walked over and sat down on the bench beside her.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I shouldn't have yelled at you, you did nothing wrong.."

"You have no need to apologize. I'm aware that your state of mind is now very fragile and easily changing. I've seen it before."

"Huh? Seen what?"

"Seen a human woman carrying a demon's child."

Kagome's eyes widened.

"You have?"

"My father once fell in love with a human woman."

"So... So you have a brother?"

"I _had_ a half brother. But he's been dead for long now."

"Oh.. I'm sorry to hear that."

"Don't be. We weren't so close."

"Why.. How did he die... Oh, or am I being too curious?"

"He killed himself. He returned from a battle to find out the woman he had loved was gone and he couldn't bear it."

"That's so sad," Kagome replied quietly, a tear gleaming in the corner of her eye.

She saw a strange emotion flicker in his eyes. An emotion she could not recognise.

"Sad indeed," Sesshoumaru replied curtly. Oh, the irony of the situation! The fates truly were gruesome creatures. Sesshoumaru felt a sudden little twinge in his heart. He couldn't define what it was. But it was better that the demon lord did not identify the feeling for it had been a tiny sting of pity. Pity that he felt towards the human woman next to him.

"Kagome-chan? Kagome-chan, where are you?"

"I'm here, Kayade-chan," Kagome called.

The door of the room was opened.

"Kagome-chan, there's someone who wishes to see you."

"Ohh?" Kagome frowned but got up and walked out of the room.

"Who is it," Sesshoumaru questioned Kayade.

"It's Hojo-kun."

"And who is he?"

"He's the guy Kagome was engaged to before something, umm, happened and he left her."

"What is he doing here?" Sesshoumaru snapped.

Kayade's eyes widened. Had she just heard a growl..?

* * *

Kagome walked into the restaurant room and her eyes widened the moment she spotted his figure.

It was Hojo-kun.

The moment he saw her he rushed over to her and indeed threw himself at her feet.

Kagome could but stare at the man, who kneeled in front of her.

"Kagome."

"Hojo-kun... What are you doing here?"

"I needed to see you."

"Umm.."

"I don't care if my parents throw me out of the family but please, Kagome I love you. Come back to me."

Kagome's eyes widened at this statement and a slight blush rose to her cheeks.

"Uhh, Hojo-kun... We're kinda causing a scene..."

"I don't care. I need you, Kagome."

"Ummm.."

At that moment strong arms wrapped themselves around Kagome's waist and pulled her backwards. Instead of the hard floor her back hit a broad chest. From the corner of her eye she managed to spot a blur of red and silver and then her eyes fell closed as she felt warm tongue caressing the side of her neck.

Hojo looked now wide-eyed at Kagome, who was leaning against the unfamiliar Japanese man, who had short black hair and tanned skin. He was nuzzling the side of Kagome's neck.

Kayade also stared at the pair.

'Ohh, Takeo-chan, I didn't know you had it in you...' She wondered to herself. 'He's acting like.. a demon..? But why would..? But who would...?' Kayade's eyes narrowed in suspicion. 'Sesshoumaru. You _wouldn't_!'

"And who you think you are?" Hojo snapped as he got up from the floor, glaring at the newly arrived man.

Sesshoumaru stopped licking Kagome's neck and shot Hojo with an arrogant glare.

"I'm her lover."

"Her what?"

"You heard me. On what rights you have come here to claim Kagome? It was you who left her alone."

"I did it because I had no choice," Hojo defended himself.

"There's always a choice. You had your chance, you lost it. Now it's my turn to play," Sesshoumaru smirked.

"Get away from her."

"Why should I?"

"Get away from her!" Hojo now yelled.

"Are you challenging me?"

Hojo shivered when he saw the amused grin on the male's face. For a moment he thought the brown eyes watching him coldly would have been glowing crimson.

"Yeah I suppose I am then," Hojo replied, his hands in fists.

Sesshoumaru chuckled softly. He bent to place one final kiss on Kagome's neck before he straightened himself and stepped forward.

Kagome fought to get her eyes open. She felt a little dizzy and very much puzzled. What had happened again? Hojo-kun... That's right, Hojo-kun had come and said he wanted her back. And then... Then she had been swept off to heaven by the use of a highly skilful tongue. It most certainly couldn't have been Hojo's tongue though, it brushed the side of her neck so silkily that... Yes. And now... Kagome's eyes shot open.

She watched from Hojo-kun to Hisakata-sama, both glaring at each other. A shiver ran down her spine when she noticed the menacing grin on Hisakata-sama's face... She also noticed his eyes were shining red.

'Well that's it then...' she sighed mentally.

Hojo started to roll up his sleeves.

"Name the time," Sesshoumaru sated calmly.

"Now," Hojo snapped. "Name the place."

"The back yard of this little restaurant."

"Deal."

"Fine."

Both guys turned to leave and started to walk towards the back door. They halted when they heard a soft voice speak.

"I suppose there is no way to stop you from doing this?"

"No, Kagome my love. I have to teach this guy a lesson."

Kagome bit her lip as she heard Hojo's words. 'Poor boy, if you only knew..'

Kagome walked over and grabbed Sesshoumaru from his sleeve.

"Don't get too excited," she whispered in a so quiet tone only Sesshoumaru's youkai ears could pick her words up.

"He wants to steal you from me. I'll rip his head off for that."

"Woah now, slow down, mister."

"I'll teach him for claiming what is mine."

Kagome hissed and tugged his arm so hard his head bent down to the same level Kagome's head was in.

"I agreed to you courting me, okay? That doesn't make me yours. I belong to no one," she glared at him.

'Yes you do belong to me,' the inner demon insisted in his mind.

'Oh shut up, idiot,' Sesshoumaru replied in a bored tone. He was watching from side what his inner demon was doing while being in control. He couldn't help but smirk as he thought what was about to happen. That "Hojo-kun" would so get his ass kicked...

"Did I make myself clear?" Kagome snarled.

"Hai, you belong to no one," inner demon replied slowly. 'But me,' he added in his thoughts.

"Good." Kagome let go of his sleeve.

She followed the two males outside.

They stood in the asphalt field, facing each other. Kayade and Kagome were standing side to side on the very stairs Kagome and Sesshoumaru had been enjoying their lunch only fifteen minutes ago. Both of the women were eyeing at the pair. Kayade was frowning and Kagome had her arms crossed. She already knew the winner...

The fight was over before it even properly started: Hojo was the one who rushed forward to attack but Sesshoumaru calmly took a step to the side blocking Hojo's strike. His hand moved swiftly and his fist met Hojo's cheek, sending the poor human fly several feet away and hitting the asphalt-covered ground.

Kagome rushed over to Hojo's unmoving body.

He was alive, and apparently fine – save for that he was unconscious and had an evil-looking big bruise forming on his left cheek. A tiny stream of blood trickled slowly down from the corner of his mouth.

"Honestly, Hisakata-sama..." Kagome shook her head.

Kayade let out a gasp as she heard her suspicious being announced out loud to be true.

'So, he's ready to go THAT far in courting Kagome-chan? Oh my...'

"You know you shouldn't have hit him that h – "

Sesshoumaru, still controlled by the inner demon, had walked over to Kagome while she had been speaking and now using the opportunity. He let his tongue slip into her open mouth.

For some strange reason her stream of words stopped at that very instant.

'Okay, I've seen enough,' Kayade decided and turned around.

Eventually the kiss broke, since they had to breathe.

Kagome gasped for air, feeling dizzy and weak on the knees.

"Warn me next time," she mumbled meekly.

Sesshoumaru smirked.

"Oh, but it's rather amusing see your eyes widen..."

Kagome's eyes flew up to his face.

He was back to himself again.

"Come now, our lunch break is nearly over."

"But.. What about Hojo-kun?"

"He'll come to it eventually."  
"Sigh..."

* * *

She smiled at him. He bent his head down and his lips found hers. She responded immediately and the kiss deepened...

They heard someone clear his throat and sprung apart.

"Interesting," the calm velvety voice reached through the small room.

"I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru-sama." She said, flashing an apologetic smile. "We got carried away..."

"I figured."

"Uhm, so.. Myoga-san is waiting for you in your office."

"Thank you for informing... And Rin, as it seems you don't feel like working now, just go home." Sesshoumaru nodded to Hitachi, who had a rather sheepish smile on his face, before walking into his own office.

It had twanged his hear to see Rin kissing her husband. Of course that wasn't anything abnormal, they were married... But still. He hadn't still used to see her like that. See her as an independent, adult woman. He missed the sweet little child that had followed him everywhere... Yes, Sesshoumaru didn't mind children's company, especially when they were quiet and knew how to behave. That was why he partly didn't hate the idea of the pup. The only problem was that the pup he was ought to have would be half-breed and its mother was a lowly ningen formerly known also as Inuyasha's woman. Ahh, such a stain in his perfect life, exactly as the miko had put it. And it didn't help at all to know that the pup was just a result from a very bad mistake he had done after drinking too much alcohol. Considering all these facts it didn't feel so great to be having a pup anymore. Well, he had never formally admitted that he was the father, had he? So, there was nothing to worry about. It was the miko's problem...

'You're being unreasonable.'

'What? I find that I'm just being logical.'

'She's right. You're just ice throughout.'

"Uhh, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

Sesshouamru raised his gaze. Ahh yes, he had already nearly forgotten about Myoga.

"Yes, Myoga. What is it?"

"I'm just curious, Sesshoumaru-sama."  
The taiyoukai raised his eyebrow.

"Have you made any progress?"

"Progress in what?"  
"In courting Kagome-sama, of course. She _is_ an ideal choice for mate, as I told you before."

The corner of Sesshoumaru's mouth twitched. Why did everyone expect him to take that miko as his mate? Sure he was courting her, but not for that reason...

"..."

"And what about your pup then?"

"What about it?"

"Has she already seen a doctor?"

"Why should I know?"

Myoga frowned.

"Well, it's lucky that I prepared just in case!"

"Hmmm?"

The office door opened.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, here's Usugi Kira. She's a doctor."  
Sesshoumaru watched the middle-height woman who had dark brown hair and dark eyes.

"And Kira-san, here's Sesshoumaru-sama, the Lord of the Western lands."

"It is pleasure to meet you, my lord," the other youkai said as she bowed down.

"Kira-san is highly experienced and is without any doubt the best choice for Kagome-sama's doctor."

Sesshoumaru studied the woman with his gaze for awhile.

"Do as you like," he replied then, turning away.

Kira bowed her head again and then left her card on his table.

"My lord, just tell her to stop by whenever she feels like it, I have time."

"Thank you."

Kira inclined her head and turned to leave.

"Myoga, escort her out."

"Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama."

The office door closed.

Sesshoumaru fell into his chair.

Peace, at last...

_

* * *

The dark-haired woman dressed in a traditional miko outfit looked around in the forest that was surrounding her._

'_This isn't where I'm supposed to be,' she thought, narrowing her eyes. _

'_And _she _is not with me either this time... I wonder what went wrong.'_

_She raised her head abruptly._

'_Evil aura. There's a demon somewhere ahead.'_

_She took a tighter grip of her bow and started to walk towards the feel of the aura._

_She arrived to a clearing and saw a demon, badly wounded one, leaning against a tree trunk. His clothes were torn, his hair was dishevelled and he seemed to be sleeping._

'_My, this isn't anything I'd remember.'_

_The demon raised its head slowly, his golden orbs glaring at the woman._

"_Miko."_

"_Sesshoumaru."_

"_You seem to be different – and I don't mean the clothes."_

"_I am different, Sesshoumaru-sama. I might look like _her _but I'm not _her_, at least not anymore."_

"_Explain."_

_The miko inclined her head and sat down on Sesshoumaru's side._

"_Ever since _she _was pulled down that well her life changed. When before _she _had been one and whole, _she _now was torn in two: On one hand she was Higurashi Kagome, high school student living in Tokyo with her family, on the other hand she was the miko Kagome, who travelled with Inuyasha searching Shikon fragments."_

_Sesshoumaru glanced at the woman sitting next to him._

"_And?"_

"_And then the day Naraku was killed, _she _was permanently torn apart. Now her two lives are separate. Though, she didn't know anything about the other one anymore. That was how the spell of the mikos influenced: It separated Kagome's miko-side, which remembered all about what happened in Sendoku Jidai and sealed it away. I was sealed away."_

"_And why are you here now?"_

"_I don't know what at first caused the seal to crack a bit. But the moment there was this small crack, it was an opening for me. I then started to show up in her dreams, forcing her to re-live some moments in that hope that eventually the sealing would break. I'm just a half. She's just a half, although she does not know it. We complete ourselves and complete is what we should be. Just imagine how your life would be, without your inner demon. It would be incomplete."_

"_Hmmmh. But what are you doing here then? This memory is not yours."_

"_I realised that. And I don't know what brought me here. I wasn't supposed to come here. Why? How? Those are good questions."_

"_Speak it out?"_

"_What?"_

"_I can sense it from you. There is something that you want from me, miko."  
"Yes. I want your help. You have already helped me, just by showing up. It made another crack into my seal. And I want you to help me. With your help I will be able to break free."_

"_What makes you think that I would agree?"_

"_You will help me, even if I had to make you to."_

_Even in his weak state, Sesshoumaru snorted arrogantly._

"_How you could make this Sesshoumaru to help you?"_

"_My dear old friend. I'm Kagome's miko side. Even if she can't use her miko powers now, I can. And it seems that here you're already half-dead, so wounded, so fragile. Some purifying added..."_

"_Are you threatening this Sesshoumaru?" he snarled._

"_Yes, I am. I have travelled long enough with Inuyasha to learn how to deal with you stubborn creatures," she watched him with resentment flashing in her eyes._

_He remained silent._

_The miko got up._

"_What say you? Will you agree to help me, Lord of the Western lands, or do I have to destroy you here and now?"_

"_You are not fooling me, miko," he spat out. "This is only a dream. You can kill me here a thousand time and yet I'd be alive."_

"_What if I purify you in the real life?"_

"_How could you? You said it yourself, you're sealed away."  
"Ah yes! But when Kagome's consciousness is not here... When she's asleep... I'm free to do what I want. How you think Rin found out that diary?"_

_Sesshoumaru raised his eyebrow._

"_I dug it out from its lost hiding place and set it out to be found. I was hoping for _her _to find it, but oh well."_

_Sesshoumaru considered this. If the miko was able to make Kagome move while she slept, she could maybe fulfil the threat. _

"_What say you?"_

"_Fine. I'll help you."_

_The miko smirked and then bent over his hurt form._

_He felt her powers flare and for a second his eyes widened. Was she going to purify him even after his agreeing to help her?_

_Warm waves ran over him. Sesshoumaru didn't know when he had closed his eyes but when he opened them again, the miko was walking away. He frowned._

_Sesshoumaru then glanced at his body and his eyes widened again. _

_He was fully healed._


	18. Reflections

**Disclaimer: **Nope. Me does not own any. Not even the chapter title. It's from the Disney-movie "Mulan".

**Chapter Seventeen – Reflections**

With a gasp her eyes snapped open. For several moments she just stared at the ceiling, breathing deeply. It still wasn't morning, she could tell. She turned her head to her side to see what the time was but immediately a sharp pain hit her and she bit her lip not to yell aloud. Honestly, the headache really was serious this time. Of all the weird dreams she had been seeing that one just now had been the weirdest. There had been only her and Sesshoumaru... Or at least Kagome thought that the woman had been her. The woman had looked exactly like her but... Something in her hadn't been quite right. She had started to walk and had met Hisakata-sama who had been in a bad condition. He had called her Miko and she had replied with Sesshoumaru... And after that Kagome had not heard a word of their conversation. In the end she had left, smirking to herself after she had healed Hisakata-sama. But how she had managed to do that, Kagome couldn't tell.

After that dream she felt it more powerfully and clearly than ever before. Something seemed to be off. She couldn't point her finger at it but something seemed to be wrong. It was as if trying to remember something you've forgotten. She knew it was there but she did not know _what_ it was.

It confused her. For some reason it felt like she wasn't quite herself. Like she was missing something. Her thoughts were shattered by the throbbing headache which made it very hard to think of anything. Groaning she turned over to her side and forced her eyes to close.

Kayade let her gaze wonder from one to another.

"Okay, something has happened between you two?"

Neither one of them responded.

"Hmph. Kagome-chan?"

"I'm all right... I just... yeah." she winced.

"All right, eh? What was that wince about then?"

Sesshoumaru turned his head a tiny bit so he was able to see the dark-haired woman.

"It's... Ehh, I just have a headache, that's all. I woke up in the middle of the night and but tossed and turned in my bed after that..."

"You should have taken aspirin before coming to work."

"I took two. They don't work."  
"Honestly, what kind of headache _is_ that?"

"I don't know. I just guess it's all because of this one disturbed dream I had. Anyway, Kayade-chan, don't worry 'bout me. I'll survive."

Kagome heaved herself up from the seat and walked into the kitchen, where she would be serving in today.

"Just a headache? She seriously thinks I'll believe that's the only thing troubling her?" Kayade shook her head.

"What about you then? Hisakata-sama?"

Sesshoumaru just glared at her.

"I'm not stupid. I figured your little charade out some time ago. Why you are doing this is none of my business and therefore I shall not ask any questions about that..."

Sesshoumaru stiffly nodded, showing his deep gratitude by this enormous gesture.

"But something's not quite right with you either. I can tell."

"_If_ I wasn't quite all right, it still wouldn't be your problem," the stoic taiyoukai replied.

"Hmmh. You've been this morning even _more_ quiet than usual! I think that tells something, ne?"

He replied nothing. Sesshoumaru got up and left the small staff-room behind.

Kayade sighed to herself.

'What a fine pair they make indeed,' she thought sarcastically. 'Well, they'll learn soon enough. Evading and not talking about your problems don't make them disappear.'

* * *

It bothered him. Bothered him very much. The sheer thought of Kagome having another self, making a pair just like he and his inner demon did... It bugged him. He couldn't exactly tell what feeling it was that nudged his nerves. There was no way he would be scared about a mere human so that was out of the question... But maybe... Just a tiny bit, of course, but maybe he was feeling nervous. He hadn't liked at all the emotions in the miko-Kagome's eyes when she had been glaring at him. Those eyes had been more like his own eyes than Kagome's. It was nothing like those warm, chocolate-brown eyes, hiding a smile inside. They had been cold, resentful and full of... sadness. Seeing those eyes had stirred something inside him, something he could not quite identify. But that self of Kagome had looked exactly like that un-dead wench of Inuyasha's... The miko Kikyo, protector of Shikon no Tama. After all, Kagome was a reincarnation of that miko, so it would only be natural to look like her, still, Sesshoumaru didn't like that. He had never liked that wench Kikyo. The same sorrowful gaze. The same hatred burning...

It confused him. How could Kagome's miko-self be so different?

'_I'm just a half. She's just a half, although she does not know it. We complete ourselves and complete is what we should be.'_

The quiet, nonchalant words echoed in his mind again. Maybe the miko was right. Maybe they needed to be whole again. Maybe, he really should help to break that seal.

But what would happen to the Kagome he knew then? The sealing had been done in the first place to protect her. How would she react if suddenly being able to remember it all again?

'She would recognise us for sure.'

'That I figured.'

'She'd want to have nothing to do with us.'

'Most probably, I always was an enemy to her.'

'Ahh, "was" is what you say?'

'...'

'You consider yourself as her ally now?'

'Hmph. Don't be too eager. We're neutral.'

'Neutral?' the inner demon chuckled. 'There was nothing "neutral" in the way you kissed her sometime ago.'

Sesshoumaru snarled.

'I told you, I wasn't myself then.'

'Wrong, you were fully yourself, you had just allowed your Lust to take a control of yourself.'

'Like this Sesshoumaru would allow something like that!'

'It's actually quite understandable. Considering you are supposed to be the rational, more "advanced" part of the two of us, such a primitive force as Lust is something I'm very familiar about. For you again, it's something new.'

'Then why do I feel it then? And of people towards _her_!'

'I'd say you're falling for her.'

'No! I'm not following my father's footsteps. This Sesshoumaru will never stoop so low as to fall for a pitiful weak human!'

'Kagome's far from weak, you know that. You saw her miko-self last night. She's strong. Very strong.'

'Like I would care!' Sesshoumaru snapped. 'I am NOT falling for her, and that's IT!'

'Baka,' was only thing the inner demon commented before its voice faded away.

Sesshoumaru's claws dug deep into his palm and few drops of blood appeared. He slowly opened his fist and watched the four deep half-moon shaped cuts made by his own talons heal quickly.

'I'm not falling for her,' he repeated, growling. A smirk rose to his lips. Yes. He felt much better now.

The most surprising thing about the diary was its deep sadness. From what he had heard from Myoga – it was not like he had asked anything but the flea just couldn't help blabbering – he had learned that the miko had always been a kind, caring and happy person. It was hard to believe that while reading the blue-covered book. Sesshoumaru recalled the piece of conversation he had had with Myoga sometime ago.

"_Everybody loved Kagome-sama. She was bright, pure and sweet person. She was warm, gentle and loving. She often had a smile on her face and that smile made other people smile as well. Also she was courageous and she had temper. Once she got so angry that even Inuyasha was scared of her."_

"_The halfbreed always was a fool," he had replied, bored expression on his face. "The wench always stayed behind his back in a battle. She always was protected by the others of the group. Even the kitsune pup protected her."_

"_Well, she always hated fighting," Myoga had explained, "besides, all she had was the bow of hers. Nobody ever taught her any other fighting skills."_

"_What? How idiotic could the hanyou have been?"_

"_I also thought it was risky, but he very seldom failed to protect her."_

'Yes. He protected her, that was the problem. Had she known how to fight herself... Had she not have been forced to depend on him... Had she not have fallen in love with him... He had loved her but he loved the un-dead wench as well. Kagome's love and affection towards that mutt is the heart of her sorrow. Because of his actions, his constant running after Kikyo, she thought that in the end, after Naraku defeated, he would choose his former love. I think she cried every single night the mutt was somewhere off with the un-dead bitch. And then... What happened truly in the day Naraku died? Which of them he really chose in the end? Her tears were spilled in vain. Her fear was all in vain.'

"Quite pitiful," he whispered out loud. Then, Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes. 'Not like I pity her though,' he added in his thoughts. 'I really couldn't care less.'

But he couldn't help asking that if what he just had said was true, if he really didn't care then why... Why he still kept on reading that blue-covered diary?

* * *

"Oh, it's you again. What is it this time?"

"I wish that you follow me."

"We're going somewhere again? Thanks but no thanks, I'll skip this time, I'm exhaust –" her sentence was interrupted by a wide yawn.

"Have you already seen a doctor for the pup?"

"Huh? What's that supposed to have to do with this?"

"Answer the question."

"Uhh, yes but.."

"Don't go there anymore."

"Huh? Just wait a second, you jerk! Why am I not allowed to go to see a doctor?"

"Just come with me now."

"Hell no. I'll stay right here and go back to sleep."

"Fine," Sesshoumaru spat out. Then he rudely stepped in and easily picked the small woman up, tossing her on his shoulder.

"Hey, you jerk, get your hands off me, now!" Kagome yelled, trying her best not to get any of those long silver strands of his into her mouth.

Sesshoumaru walked out of her apartment, closing the door after them, fully ignoring her "request".

"Put me down now! Hisakata-sama, honestly!" she said as she was miserably hanging on his shoulder. Feeling rather frustrated, she punched his upper back with her small fist. He didn't even flinch.

They walked out to the sunshine, she still struggling and yelling at him. Sesshoumaru calmly tossed her on the backseat of the taxi and then seated himself next to her.

"Now let's go," he said to the driver.

* * *

"Ahh, Hisakata-sama!" The brown-haired tall woman bowed down in front of him, before turning to Kagome.

"I'm Doctor Usugi Kira," she introduced herself. "And you must be Mrs Hisakata."

"Uhh.." Kagome blushed.

Sesshoumaru coughed softly.

"Doctor Usugi, here's Miss Higurashi Kagome."

"Oh? I'm sorry, I have got the wrong idea then," the otter youkai answered with an apologetic smile.

The glint of curiosity in the demon doctor's eyes was not missed by Sesshoumaru.

"It's okay," still red Kagome mumbled.

"Then Higurashi-san, if you please follow me, this way.."

Kagome followed the dark-brown-haired doctor, side to side with Hisakata-sama.

"Why didn't you tell me we were going to see a doctor for the pup?" she hissed.

"You didn't ask," Sesshoumaru replied with the shrug which he knew would annoy her.

"I wouldn't have insisted on staying home and hadn't put up a fight had you only say we were going to see the doctor."

"What fun would that have been?"

Kagome was taken aback. 'Woah, that's so unlike him to say that. He's.. joking!' Kagome couldn't help glancing at him from the corner of her eye.

He was smirking.

"Why are _you_ coming this way too?" she asked sharply trying to hide her confusion.

"What do you think? I'll accompany you in the check-up."

"Oh no you won't!"

"Don't even think that you can tell me what to do," he replied with quiet growl.

"Don't pretend that you care," she spat out as quietly as he had growled.

Sesshoumaru raised his head and saw Doctor Usugi standing a few yards ahead of them, her hand resting on a doorknob. She was eyeing them both with curiosity. The silver-haired taiyoukai shot her a cold glare and she immediately bowed her head in an apology. She opened the door and gestured them to step into the room.

"Please."

"Hisakata-sama, could you please stay? I could check you too, you seem to be a little pale."

Sesshoumaru was already opening his mouth in refusal when he spotted the expression on Doctor Usugi's face. Even though the words had never been spoken aloud, Sesshoumaru knew what she meant.

_Stay here please, I need to talk to you only._

He nodded now calmed down.

"Higurashi, you go ahead."

Kagome gave him a puzzled look but obeyed.

Once she was out of the room, Doctor Usugi sighed.

"I have to say, my lord, that she'll make a fine mate for you."

Sesshoumaru didn't reply.

"And I couldn't help noticing your.. umm.. _special_ relationship."  
"That is nothing for you to be curious about," he answered coldly.

"Of course it isn't, my lord. I apologize." She bowed.

"Now, I doubt this is what you wanted to talk to me about," Sesshoumaru said quirking an eyebrow.

"It isn't, my lord," she admitted. Her expression changed into a more serious one. "She is a miko, isn't she?"

"Yes, that's true."  
"Well, that might explain..." the otter doctor frowned. "But still, I doubt she would be powerful enough to hide it. And it didn't quite feel like a miko's power."

"What is it?"

Doctor Usugi sighed. "For some reason, I wasn't able to read the pup's aura. It has never happened to me before. It felt as if a stronger power would have drowned the pup's youki, hiding it. Hmm.. That power felt somehow familiar but yet I can't quite tell..."

Sesshoumaru fought with himself for awhile, was this female youkai to be trusted or not? But well, Myoga trusted her and Myoga was very good when coming to judge humans' or youkais' nature..

And she was a doctor anyway.

"The power most probably comes from Shikon no Tama."

"Shikon no Tama! I heard it had disappeared."

"It had. It disappeared in her. She's its carrier and protector."

"_In_ her you say it?"

"Yes, that's correct."

"Oh my. Poor girl..."

"Hmm. Was there all you wished to discuss with me?"

"Yes. That was all."

Sesshoumaru nodded, leaving the room behind.

* * *

He was there again. Sitting in the very table, dressed as neatly as ever, and the dark eyes like glued on her. Kagome shifted uncomfortably under the intense gaze. In her mind she decided just to completely ignore him, as she continued to clean the table.

"Higurashi-san?" it was a soft voice that called her.

Kagome turned her head and saw the guy.

"Yorukawa-san, isn't it?" she said flashing a quick smile. "How can I help you?"

"I assume you got the flowers I sent to you?"

"Yes."

"Good... Higurashi-san, my apologies if I am too rude but I wish you to have a dinner with me."

"Uhhmm... Is that like an invitation to date or something?"

"Something like that yes."

"Uhmm... I don't know. I've kinda been seeing this one guy and.. well.."

"It's all right," he hurriedly answered. "Here's my phone number," he said, giving her his business card. "Call me. Please."

He bowed his head and left the restaurant.

Kayade hurried to her friend's side.  
"Oh, now what was that?"

"I just got asked out on a date," Kagome replied, frowning.

"Ooh! You didn't agree now, did you?"

"Of course not! I don't know, I suppose that guy is okay, but he just keeps staring me, you know... It's kinda creepy. Besides, since I'm kinda seeing Hisakata-sama already.."

"Oh yes, that's right! Now, how are the things between you two?"

"Well.. I don't quite know. You know what Hisakata-sama is like," Kagome said, rolling her eyes.

Kayade giggled. "Oh yes, I know."

"But still.. If he only wants he can be like a completely different person. He even joked with me once."  
"You know, I think he really likes you."

"Hmmh, I don't know."

"Awwh, why not?"

"I still believe there's something fishy about this. He doesn't seem to be such a person, you know..?"

"Well.. What about your feelings then?"

Kagome sighed and closed her eyes.  
"My feelings.. for him? I think he's one big jerk. I feel a little wary around him. But when he kisses me.." she swallowed.

"Hmmmh?" Kayade encouraged her to go on, curiosity twinkling in her sparkling green eyes.

"Well, I surely find him physically attractive but.. I doubt I feel anything more for him. I do not quite trust him, you know.."

"Oh yeah?" Kayade smirked. "It's in his kiss," she sang then and giggled.

"Oh shut up!" Kagome groaned, blushing a bit.

Kayade nodded her head, but couldn't help a knowing smile rising up to her lips.

* * *

"You know, that Kagome-chan's admirer was here again," Kayade informed once she was in the staff-room with Takeo-chan. The restaurant had just been closed.

Sesshoumaru didn't reply.

"He couldn't take his eyes off her," Kayade said, shaking her head.

"Hmph."

"The most interesting thing though was that Kagome-chan told me he gave her his number and asked her out on a date."

"So he did?"

"Yeah. And Kagome-chan agreed."

"_What!_ " Sesshoumaru hissed, his eyes narrowing dangerously.

"Yeah. They'll go out to dinner. Kagome seems to be excited," Kayade lied at ease, carefully watching the traces of emotions in Sesshoumaru's eyes. She didn't usually like lying, but she needed to know whether Sesshoumaru was only playing with her.

The taiyoukai clenched his hand into a fist. So, she was planning on seeing someone else? Mentally Sesshoumaru shook his head. Now wait. Why would he feel this upset because of such a petty thing? He didn't truly care for the human, so in all sense he shouldn't care about a contestant for her affections.

Oh, the plan. Yes, the plan of his. A contestant would most probably ruin the plan, and he couldn't allow that to happen. Yes. That had to be why he had got so upset.

Sesshoumaru got up.

"Where are you going?" Kayade asked.

"None of your concern," he replied coldly.

Kayade watched his back as he walked out of the little room. She smiled to herself.

Kagome was cleaning the table in the now empty restaurant, lost in her own thoughts.

She startled when a hand was placed upon her own.

"Hisakata-sama?" She breathed out as she semi-turned around.

"Why did you agree?" he said, golden eyes locked with her hazel ones.

"Huh?" she said, confusion clearly showing on her face. "What are you talking about?"

"That Yorukawa-guy asked you out on a date, didn't he?"

"Yeah he did.. So?"

"So why did you say yes?"

"What?" Kagome said, frowning. "All I ever said to him was that I'm already seeing someone."

Sesshoumaru's grip of her hand tightened.

"You refused his offer?"

"Well yeah. What did you think I'd do, huh? You couldn't possibly believe I would have wanted to date him?"

'Kayade,' Sesshoumaru growled in his mind. 'You little..'

"Hisakata-sama?"

"Yes?"

"Are you all right?"

"Yes."

"Good. Could you then please remove your hand before you crush mine?"

The taiyoukai eased his grip but did not take his hand away.

He stared into the depths of those hazel eyes. What was it about her?

The next thing he realised was that his lips were pressed against hers and that his tongue was exploring her mouth from the inside.

Just how had it again come to this?

Her eyes were closed and every coherent thought seemed to be leaving her mind when suddenly she remembered Kayade's teasing words.

_It's in his kiss.._

If that was true then... Kagome's heart leaped and started to race.

Kayade was leaning against the wood on the doorway, watching the pair, still smiling to herself. They could say whatever they wanted. Kagome could go on and on and say it all was just physical attraction. Sesshoumaru could blame it all in not being himself but yet... That kiss gave it all away. Kayade turned around and walked back into the staff-room.

Yes. Whatever they would say... However they would deny and refuse...

She knew the truth.

* * *

"Have I got any calls?"

"Nope, Sesshoumaru-sama", Rin chirped.

He walked over to his office-door, ready to open it when Rin spoke again.

"There's someone waiting for you inside."

"You let him in without my permission?"

"Well, Myoga told me that it's okay... And I trust his word."

"Hmm."

He opened the door and even before glancing at the figure casually sitting on his wooden desk he knew who it was. Demonic aura lazily swirled in the air around the guest.

His amber eyes met pale yellowish ones. It was a woman, who had waist-long, platinum blond hair and long lavender stripes on her cheeks.

She was a dog demoness.

"Why hello, Sesshoumaru," she greeted with a smug smirk on her face.

"I finally found you."


	19. Further away

**Chapter eighteen – Further away**

"Shizuki. Why are you here?"

"I came to see you," the female inu youkai answered.

"Why?"

"Have you forgotten, dear Sesshoumaru?"

"Forgotten what?"

"Forgotten the agreement of our fathers."

"No, I haven't forgotten that."

"Then why do you question my being here?" Shizuki inquired, her head tilted to left.

"Our fathers are long since deceased. Why would we care about their agreement now?"

"So you wish to disgrace the memory of your father? You want me to dishonour my late father's wish?"

_Damn that clever bitch,_ Sesshoumaru thought. _After that I cannot disagree..._

"So you want that we abide into the will of our fathers?"

"Naturally. It can't be that bad fate, can it," Shizuki said with a ghost of a smirk on her lips.

* * *

He was sitting on a high chair and staring at the drink in the long glass before him. It hurt him so deep that the pain was also physical...

"Another one," the dark-haired woman sitting on his left side next to the counter called.

His thoughts returned to the event that had taken place earlier on the afternoon...

"_Kagome! Well this is a pleasant surprise indeed! Please, come in, come in."_

"_No, I don't think I will." she flashed a sad smile. "I came to apologize."_

"_About this?" he asked, pointing the bruise on his cheek. "It's nothing, you don't have to – "_

"_I apologize," she cut in, "for everything. I've been so cruel to you when you always were so good to me. I understand very well why you would hate me.."_

"_I could never hate you, Kagome."_

"_I don't deserve you," she said softly. "That's why I believe this is for the best."_

_He stared at her outstretched hand. There was something gleaming on her palm. He picked it up. It was a ring – an engagement ring._

"_I hope you will find happiness, Hojo-kun," she said, flashing that sad smile for the last time before turning around and walking away._

_And all he could do was to watch her back as she once again walked away from him._

The glass was now empty; he had drunk its contents as he had been lost in his memory.  
"Another one," he said to the bartender behind the counter and sighed.

_Kagome, you can say that you don't deserve me, that this is for the best but you just don't see, do you? You're the only one I want..._

He watched the golden ring in his hands as he turned it over. It felt so cool against his palm...

"That's a beautiful ring," a female voice stated.

Hojo turned his head and saw that the woman who had been sitting next to him and was now watching him. She had raven black hair up in a bun, dark brown eyes and ruby lips.

"Thank you," he replied hoarsely.

"That's for a woman, isn't it?"

"It was."

"What happened?"

"She returned it today before walking away from me."

"I'm sorry to hear that... You must feel horrible."

"You have no idea," Hojo sighed.

The woman chuckled darkly.

"In fact I do. I know how it feels like. To love someone for many years. And then realise that he can't ever return that love to you. That someone else has got his heart..."

She was now staring into the distance.

"I'm sorry," Hojo said quietly. "I guess we're the same then."

"Yeah, I suppose so."

"I'm Hojo," he introduced himself.

"Yameko Kagura," the woman replied, with a tiny smile.

* * *

"Who is she, Myoga-jii-san?"

"She is Tadachi Shizuki. Dog demon as Sesshoumaru-sama. Her father was close friends with Sesshoumaru-sama's father. And when both Sesshoumaru-sama and Shizuki-sama were small, their fathers agreed on a mating deal."

"What? She's Sesshoumaru-sama's betrothed then?"

"Yes, that is correct."

"But... Is there any way out of it?"

"My, Rin-san, I thought that you wanted a mate for Sesshoumaru-sama."

"Yes, but this isn't what I had in my mind... What about Kagome-nee-chan?"

"I'm afraid he has to forget Kagome-sama."

"But... But –!"

"No buts, Rin-san, there are anything we can do about it."

"But that deal's _ancient_ for heaven's sake, things have certainly changed a lot since then. What's the point in keeping it now?"

"To honour their fathers' memory, Rin-san."

"Screw the honour," Rin muttered heatedly.

"Rin!" the shocked old flea-demon scolded.

"Sesshoumaru-sama doesn't love Shizuki-san!"

"Now, Rin-san – "

"How could he take her as his mate when he doesn't love her!"

"Rin-san – "

"He shouldn't be doing this to Kagome-nee-chan – "

"Rin-san!"

The woman fell silent.

"I understand how you feel, Rin-san... But this is Sesshoumaru-sama's decision. We should not interfere."

"I know that, Myoga-jii-san, I know.." the little woman grumbled. "But he always makes the wrong decisions... That old git."

* * *

"Kayade-chan, what a surprise to see you here."

The blond-haired girl turned her head and smiled as she saw who it was.

"Oh, nice to see you again, Hitachi-san."

"Hey... You have some time right now? Care to come with me for a cup of coffee?"

"Uhhh.. Sure," Kayade flashed a smile. "I know a good coffeehouse here nearby."

Once they both had a cup of coffee on the table before them, Hitachi sighed.

"You know, there's actually something I wish to discuss with you."

"Oh there is? What is it then, Hitachi-san?"

"It's about Sesshoumaru."

"Hisakata-sama? What about him?"  
"I've heard that he's working at the same restaurant with you and Kagome-chan, is that correct?"

"Yeahh.. We have him there. 'Takeo-chan'." Kayade rolled her eyes.

"So... How does he act near her?"

"Well.. He's very polite and considerate. When I didn't yet know that it was him I thought it was rather sweet. And then I caught them making out in the staff room."

Hitachi frowned.

"What is it, Hitachi-san? You don't like the idea of Kagome-chan and Hisakata-sama hooking up?"

"I like that idea, yes, but I highly doubt Sesshoumaru's motives in this."

"What do you mean?"

"It's not really like him to be courting someone – yet alone a human – like that."

"But if he's in love.."  
"Kayade-chan, you're young. You don't know Sesshoumaru as well as I do. The day he falls in love... Hell must be frozen over."

"But then why - ?"

"I don't know, and that's why I'm kind of nervous. I fear that in the end Kagome-chan will be hurt. And she has already suffered so much."

"But you haven't seen the way they kiss, Hitachi-san! He can't be lying about that, can he!"

"I don't know, Kayade-chan, but I warn you: There is nothing Sesshoumaru can't do. And the worst thing is that he knows that. I want you to keep a close eye on them. Especially on him. And if it seems that she'd get hurt..."

"Yes?"

"Then give me a call," Hitachi said in a low tone. "And I'll make him regret that he ever decided to play with her."

* * *

They were having a dinner in a fancy restaurant. He really didn't want to be there though.

_I'd rather be anywhere with that human wench than here_, he thought gloomily.

'My my, did I just hear that right?'

'Hmph.'

'You agree with me then, finally?'

'I didn't say _that_.'

'Hmmh... Because you couldn't possibly take Kagome as your mate?'

'Yes.'

'Because she's not beautiful enough?'

'Yes.'

'And human?'

'Yes.'

'And rash?'

'Yes.'

'And weak?'

'Yes.'

'And she has temper?'

'Yes.'

'Interesting,' the inner demon then said.

'What is your point,' Sesshoumaru questioned.

'So _your_ ideal mate would be a beautiful, calm, elegant and strong demon, is that right?'

'That is correct.'

'And here you are, sitting on a date with a beautiful, calm, elegant and strong demon, wishing that you could be with a rash, weak, temperamental and ugly human also known as Kagome...'

'I still don't see what you are hinting at.'

'I'm hinting at that Shizuki is all that _you_ could wish for from a mate and yet you prefer my choice.'

'I didn't mean it like that.'

'Then how did you mean it?'

'...'

'That's what I thought.'

'Shut up already you nuisance,' Sesshoumaru snarled.

'Oh, getting grumpy now, are you? I suppose that means I hit the point.'

'Hmph, you wish...'

The inner demon chuckled.

'Wouldn't it be easier to just admit it already?'

'Admit what?'

'That the silly little plan of yours isn't working the way it should.'

'Hmph.'

'You know, pride comes down before the fall.'

'You're meaning?'

'It's rather low to try to make someone to fall for you just because you think so highly of yourself that you can't handle the fact that someone might not fall in love with you the second she sees you.'

'I do not think too highly of myself.'

The inner demon burst into laughter.

'Buddy, that was the best joke from you… like ever... You're truly out of it, huh?' he wiped away tears of laughter before he continued.

'But it's good that the plan's not working.'

'What do you mean it's not working,' Sesshoumaru retorted.

'Well, she's falling for you a bit by bit that's true... But it's not all.'

'What do you mean?'

'The plan backfired, my dear other self.'

'Hmmmh?'

'You're falling for her.'

'I'm NOT falling for her.'

'So it would seem to you,' the inner demon chuckled for the final time, before vanishing again.

"Sesshoumaru? You've been quiet for so long now. Are you all right?"

Sesshoumaru gazed at her and found that Shizuki's delicate eyebrow was raised and she was eyeing at him.

"I'm fine," he said, concentrating on the dinner.

* * *

It was the time of relaxation. He was sitting in his living room, a cup of tea in a nearby table, the fire-cat purring on his lap and the miko's diary in his hands. It had already become a sort of routine to him to be sitting on the sofa enjoying the peaceful atmosphere – Sesshoumaru was one to appreciate peace and quiet.

"_He left again tonight. Kikyo's soul stealers appeared near our camp and Inuyasha vanished soon after... Oh, earlier today we crossed paths with Kouga-kun again. He was so sweet– even brought me flowers.. But he just doesn't get it. I like him, I won't deny that, but I don't like him the way he'd like. It's kinda flattering yet creepy to hear him going on and on about "Kagome, you're my woman.". I mean, he's nothing more than a friend to me..._

_Hmm, it was tiresome, they started to fight again. Inuyasha and Kouga-kun I mean... It's confusing. You know, most of the time I feel like Inuya__sha tries his best to ignore me. But each time Kouga-kun appears he becomes, well, sorta possessive. Therefore I suppose there's still hope. That maybe... He could someday tell me that he loves me..._

_Ummh,__ I guess I'm daydreaming again. Sigh!_

_No, I don't want to think about that, because I might start crying again and I can__'t do that. I have to be strong. For the others... Nobody has heard of Naraku for some time now and we are all full of anxiety, anticipation and nervousness. I can feel it. So I can't let it show. I have to continue being my cheery self, for others' sake.. __If I fall apart... what would they do?"_

* * *

"Welcome! How can I serve you?"

"I'd like to have a cup of coffee, please."

"All right, right away!" The waitress flashed a pretty smile and walked over to get the order.

"Here you go," she said, placing the cup on the table before the customer.

"Thank you... Is everything all right, miss waitress?" the customer asked when she spotted the waitress' grimace.

"Yeah, I'm all right," she answered with a weak smile.

"Are you sure? You look like you'd be feeling a bit ill."

"I just don't quite bear the stench of coffee right now," the waitress explained and smiled yet again. "But you enjoy your cup of coffee!" she bowed and walked away.

"What was that about?" Sesshoumaru asked one eyebrow raised when Kagome returned to his side behind the counter.

"Dunno... Just don't make me to go anywhere near a coffee pot for awhile, will ya?"

"Hmmh?"

"I think it's because of the pregnancy. The smell of coffee twists my stomach... "

"All right, I'll take care of the coffee."

"Thank you, Hisakata-sama," the miko said flashing a smile. "That's so sweet of you."

"Hmphh. I merely don't want you to make a mess all over a customer; it wouldn't be a good publicity for the restaurant."

"Jerk," she hissed and turned away from him.

Sesshoumaru watched her back and pushed aside the tiny twinge of regret.

_This Sesshoumaru does not regret his words to a lowly human wench_, he firmly told himself.

And 'this Sesshoumaru' also ignored the snort, coming from his inner demon that followed his thought.

* * *

Kagome was in her bed, lying on her back and watching the white ceiling. She just couldn't get any sleep... The thick curtains didn't block all the lights coming from the city and a few shafts of light invaded her room. They gave her room an eerie glow as they climbed up her white walls.

She felt a sudden twinge of fear as her eyes followed the patterns that the dim shafts of light made. It felt as if someone – or something – would have been hiding in the murky, shadowy corners.

Her hands flew to rest on her belly as to protect the child she carried from whatever it was, lurking around in her room...

And then the feeling of relaxation mixed with calm and relief filled her as she realised it has all just been her imagination, no one was there save for herself and her cat...

Her hands still rested on her belly.

A half demon...

Her child would grow up without a father. It saddened her. Though, she doubted Sesshoumaru would make a very good father for the baby anyway, since he hadn't even once called the child his... It was always just "your pup" when Sesshoumaru spoke about the child. And hers it would be then! If the baby would not have a father, she'd have to be twice a mother for the little one then. She was scared of course, what kind of a life a fatherless hanyou-child would face. And it was a huge responsibility, Kagome wasn't quite sure if she would be able to handle it.

But it comforted her to know that she wasn't alone. Her mom, after overcoming the shock, had promised her full support. Kayade and Rin would surely be ready to help and stay by her side. She wouldn't be completely alone.

It wasn't Sesshoumaru's fault, she didn't blame him at all. It was her fault. She had given in. She had the responsibility now. And she wasn't going to flinch.

Her baby would need her.

Her baby...

All her thoughts swirling around those two little and yet so great words she finally fell asleep.

* * *

"Silly woman. Stop following me."

"I'm not following you," she replied innocently.

"Why are you trailing my footsteps then, wench?"

"Because I like to annoy you! Sheesh, you're such a stuck-up twit, you know that!" She prodded his back.

He stiffened immediately.

"Woman, this Sesshoumaru would like to point out your use of tongue. Watch it or I will have to remove the said organ."

She but giggled and prodded him again.

"My, you're so tense! That's it then!"

The woman determinedly took his hand in hers and led him into the little empty staff-room ahead.

"Now throw away that shirt of yours," she commanded after the door was closed.

"What?"

"Aw, come on! For once I'm doing voluntarily something nice to you!"

"Are you now," he questioned, one eyebrow raised and voice full of sarcasm.

"'Course I am. Now, take off your shirt."

Sesshoumaru glared at her but decided to comply. The mischievous glint in the woman's eyes had awoken his curiosity.

For awhile she just stared at his bare, well formed chest. Then, while blushing a little she shook her head violently and walked over to him.

"Sit."

Sesshoumaru frowned at her commanding tone but the inner demon merely chuckled, nudging its rational self telling that it was better just to do as she wished.

Once he was seated on the bench she flashed a smile and placed her hands on his shoulders. With her hands she gently urged him to turn until she was finally facing the demon lord's back. Then she began her work. Her hands knowingly ran over his tensed muscles, easily finding the sore jammed spots. With the circular motion of her fingers she undid the sore knots. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and allowed himself to relax, listening to his inner demon's satisfied purring. He didn't know how long they were sitting in that room, he was all relaxed and enjoying the feel of her massaging hands dancing over the muscles of his back. When the hands stopped moving he wasn't able to hold back a disappointed whimper. The animalistic sound caused the woman to giggle. She bent forward, brining her mouth to the level of Sesshoumaru's ear.

"I told you it was something nice." her whispered words were full of glee and mischievousness.

To suddenly feel her soft warm breath so close to his ear, so close to his skin surprised him. But what _really_ surprised the stoic demon-lord was what the miko did next.

Not really pausing to think what she exactly was doing, nor giving a thought for the consequences she brought her lips closer to him and placed a soft butterfly-kiss on the side of his neck. Really, the situation had just been too tempting. His eyes widened as several more kisses followed the first one, trailing their way up to his jaw-line. Sesshoumaru turned his head to the side to get a glimpse of the woman. The moment after he felt her sweet lips pressed again his. Her tongue playfully nudged his lower lip and Sesshoumaru got the hint, opening his mouth slightly. He could feel the smile on her lips as she slipped her tongue inside his mouth. Somewhere in distance, at the edge of his consciousness a red haze gathered up.

And then, as suddenly as it all had begun, Kagome broke the kiss. She straightened herself and flashed a smile for Sesshoumaru. He managed to spot the mysterious sparkle in her eyes before she turned and walked away.

* * *

"Mmmmhh!" Kayade exclaimed as she stretched, "that was a good movie!"

"So it was," Kagome answered smiling.

"Hey," Kayade suddenly said, looking at some people on the other side of the movie theatre's entrance hall. "Isn't that guy over there Hisakata-sama?"

"Huh? Where?" Kagome tiptoed so that she could see.

And then she spotted him from among the crowd. His long silver hair on a low ponytail as usual when he was in public, wearing a black coat that suited him very well, his face as blank as always. And then Kagome spotted something else. He wasn't alone.

"Kayade-chan... Who is that woman?"

A tall, elegant woman who had long platinum blond hair was standing very close to Sesshoumaru and was seemingly chatting with him.

"I don't know," the wolf princess answered, "I've never seen her before."

And then, as the two friends still continued to stare at the pair the woman turned onto Sesshoumaru and boldly kissed him on the lips.

Kagome stood there, dumbfounded, unable to turn her gaze, unable to move. She was so shocked that she didn't even realise when a firm nudge turned her over and a determined hand dragged her away. She closed her eyes but all she could see was that scene, the unknown beautiful woman kissing Sesshoumaru...

When she opened her eyes again, she was standing outside the movie theatre in the cool evening air.

"Are you okay?" she heard Kayade's quiet voice but didn't register her words. She was now furiously digging through her pocket, trying to find something.

Kayade took warily a step back. She saw Kagome's eyes, they were flaming. She felt Kagome's aura, it was wrapped up in passionate rage. The little woman in front of her was fuming!

Numbly she watched as Kagome pulled a small card out of her pocket and then took out her cell-phone, obviously dialling a number with rash, aggressive taps.

"Hello, this is Higurashi Kagome," she said to the phone.

Kayade's curiosity raised its head. To whom was she calling now?

"Yes, Yorukawa-san. I was wondering if your offer for the dinner is still available."


	20. Be a man

**Chapter nineteen – Be a man**

They were still standing in the lobby of the movie theatre. She was trying to get him to talk but didn't quite succeed. All that she got from him was "Hmmmh.". It was then she decided to do it.

When Sesshoumaru felt the female so close to him, he froze. Shizuki didn't seem to notice nor care. The warning growl that was forming deep in his throat never got out for she closed their distance and pressed her lips on his at that moment. They stayed like that for quite a while because Sesshoumaru got the urge to rip off the head of this woman who so outrageously insulted his person. Luckily, before he even raised his claws, he remembered who she was. She was Shizuki, daughter of Shikikaya who had been his father's general and also a very close friend with him. Tearing his daughter's head off wouldn't exactly be the most polite thing to do.

Sesshoumaru took a firm grip of her shoulders and pushed her away from him.

"Tadachi Shizuki. What do you think you are doing?"

"Sesshoumaru. We're supposed to get mated. Why shouldn't I kiss you?"

'Yeah. Why shouldn't she kiss you?' the inner demon inquired.

'This Sesshoumaru does not wish to be kissed so abruptly.'

'I'll say, you even wanted to rip off her head!'

'Well, she did insult this Sesshoumaru's person.'

'Curious indeed,' the inner demon chuckled.

'What is?'

'That when that inu-bitch Shizuki kissed you, you wanted to tear her head off. But...'

'But?'

'But when earlier today the miko kissed you, just as abruptly as Shizuki now, you did not wish to tear off her head but to rip off something completely different of hers...'

'Shut up, nuisance.'

'Like her clothes...'

'Silence!'

The inner demon was now openly laughing at Sesshoumaru.

'You're falling for the miko, pal.'

'Am not! Now, be gone!'

The inner demon obeyed his orders though his laughter lingered hauntingly in Sesshoumaru's mind.

"Because," Sesshoumaru started out loud, finally answering Shizuki's question, "I think you are proceeding too fast."

"Hmmmmh? Tell me, Sesshoumaru, do you have someone you like?"

"This Sesshoumaru likes no one."

"I should have guessed," Shizuki sighed. "You've always been so boring."

* * *

The next morning Sesshoumaru went to work, as usual. Though, which was less usual, he was greeted by an oppressive, cold silence instead of a cheery: "Good morning, Takeo-chan!"

Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow.

"Something wrong?"

The two women turned to look at him. Both were glaring at him, and it was a glare that promised death.

Kagome then hissed and turned around, storming out off the room.

"Now what was that about," Sesshoumaru wondered out loud.

"Like you wouldn't know!" Kayade snapped, glaring daggers at the demon lord.

"Explain."

"Very well, _Lord of the Western Lands. _We saw you last night."

"Hmmmh?"

"Tell me, Sesshoumaru." Kayade said, narrowing her eyes and showing off her fangs. "Who is that inu-bitch you were with?"

"Ah that... She's Shizuki. Just my fiancée," Sesshoumaru replied in a bored tone.

"Just your fiancée?" Kayade repeated, now yelling and growling openly.

"Oh, I see it now! You always were just playing with her, right? Not for a one moment were you serious!" Kayade now was standing right before him, her clawed finger furiously prodding his chest.

"Hitachi was right about you," she spat out, eyes gazing at him full of disgust and antipathy. Sesshoumaru noticed that her free hand, the one that was not sinking into his chest, twitched anxiously as if it wished to punch him. For awhile Sesshoumaru really thought that the raged wolf demon would beat him into a pulp. Instead she spat at his feet and stomped off, using the same door through which Kagome had vanished earlier.

'Way to go, pal,' the inner demon snickered.

'You keep your mouth shut.'

'Now they both think that you're a two-timing jerk.'

'I said be silent,' Sesshoumaru snarled.

'I doubt she'll ever speak to you again.'

'...'

'This is just great. How am I ever to mate her now? We gotta win her back.'

'This Sesshoumaru – '

'Oh come on, twit! Don't give me that crap that you don't give a damn about her, 'cause neither of us is buying it!'

'...'

'Admit it! It disturbs you that she's so upset, doesn't it?'

'Hmph,' Sesshoumaru replied, ignoring the twinge in his heart.

'Feh, suit yourself, snowball!' with that snap the voice of his other self was gone.

_Great,_ Sesshoumaru sighed to himself. _Everyone's sulking and hating me now and it's all Shizuki's fault. Well, at least Kayade was able to control her anger and did not insult my person by hitting me._

* * *

A couple of days later Sesshoumaru thought that it would have been best if the wolf princess had just beaten him with all of her anger... But no. She had to go to extreme.

"You have a guest waiting for you in your office, Sesshoumaru-sama."

"Again? Why did you let the guest into my room?"

"It would have been impolite to make her wait here?"

_Her, is it? I just hope it's not Shizuki.._

The woman was dressed in traditional silk kimono. Its colour was rich royal red and it had pure white stars embroidered in it.

"What is the meaning of this," Sesshoumaru demanded to know.

"Hisakata Sesshoumaru, the Lord of the Western Lands." she greeted him bowing.

"I am Shirakawa Kayade, the heir of the Northern Lands. I am here to speak to you on the behalf of my father Shirakawa Kouga, the Lord of the Northern Lands."

Sesshoumaru gazed at the wolf princess, frowning. She took out a scroll of parchment and cleared her throat.

"Lord Sesshoumaru, hear Our words. The miko Higurashi Kagome has for a long time been a close friend and ally to the Northern Lands. Thus we now declare that any insult towards Lady Higurashi Kagome will be seen as an insult towards the Northern Lands. Hereby We raise Our voices now, to tell You that We do not agree with Your decision to mate this Tadachi Shizuki. We are being serious with this statement.

If You wish to ignore Our declaration, know, that the times of war may fall upon us. This is what We have wished You to know.

Remember Our words.

Lord Shirakawa Kouga & Lady Shirakawa Ayame of the Northern Lands."

Sparkling green met burning amber. Then Kayade lowered her head in a bow. She set the parchment-scroll she had just read aloud on his desk.

"I have thus fulfilled the task my father has appointed to me," she announced.

"Farewell, Lord Hisakata Sesshoumaru of the Western Lands." she bowed for the last time and then walked out of his office, her white tail swinging in the pace of her footsteps.

Once he was alone, Sesshoumaru sighed. Now this was going to be messy. Truth to be told, he'd rather take the miko as his mate than the dog demoness. But his pride and honour bound him. He couldn't forsake nor ignore his father's will without bringing shame upon himself. He couldn't disobey his father's will even if it would cause a war.

* * *

And then the happenings took a twist to worse. On that same evening when he returned to his home he found there was someone waiting for him.

"I told you this before, Lord of the Western Lands: Once you go too far I will come to stop you."

"What is it that you want, Hitachi."

"A revenge for her."

"Why such affection towards plain ningen girl? You're not even friends with her."

"You really have no heart."

Hitachi's hollow words met silence. He inhaled deep before he spoke again.

"That girl faced with her companions the feared hanyou Naraku. She had to watch all of her friends to fall. Her memory was taken from her, a piece of her heart was taken from her! And then due one lapse her fiancé left her and now this poor pregnant woman must stand in responsibility for all that she has done. And now you wish to play with her affections and break her heart. She has suffered enough, Sesshoumaru. She has suffered, she has struggled... Yet, do you see her tears? No, she smiles widely and is happy... Happy!"

Silence fell again. Hitachi shifted a little bit.

"It's still not too late, Sesshoumaru. You can seek for your heart. If you find it, listen to it. You can learn to love that plain ningen girl. You don't have to hurt her."

Sesshoumaru answered with a snort.

"But know this: If you keep on hurting her, if you ignore her pain and pair up with Shizuki, then you are doomed. The war will seek you out. I will crush you. If the fight would be just between the two of us, then true, you would win. But I am not alone. You are. You stand alone in this fight, Sesshoumaru. All the others have abandoned you. No one will be standing by your side. No one will defend you. Not even Rin."

After saying these final words the Lord of the Southern Lands rose and left Sesshoumaru's apartment.

* * *

"You haven't done anything rash... have you?"

"I was yesterday on a date with Yorukawa Rennosuke."

"That guy who's the head of the Yorukawa corp.? Sesshoumaru-sama's business partner?"

"Yep, that's the guy."

"You... Are you angry at Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Furious. I can't believe he did that to me!"

He sighed, a gloomy expression on his face.

"I was afraid of this all the time..."

"What is it, Hitachi-san?"

The demon focused his bright green cat-like eyes into hers.

"I'm sorry to say this, Kagome-san. But I think that it might be that he never was serious with you. That he only played with you."

Kagome's eyes widened.

"But Hitachi-san... Why?"

"I do not know. But I've known him long enough to know his recent behaviour isn't quite the one he's known of."

"Well.. yeah..." Kagome bit her lip.

"I am sorry," Hitachi said.

Kagome heard from the tone of his voice that he truly meant it.

"It's all right," she replied with a weak smile. "I just need a little time to get used to it..."

"Take all time you just need," Hitachi said gently.

* * *

"You look stunning, Kagome!"  
"Why thank you, Rennosuke-san." she flashed him a smile. She was wearing the lavender evening gown Sesshoumaru had given to her that day he had took her with him to Italy.

"Where are we going again?"

"It's a business party, my dear Kagome. An anniversary to be exact."

"Hmmh, Sounds quite fancy. Are you sure that I fit in?"

"An angel like you will fit in without a doubt."

"Thank you, Rennosuke-san... Shall we get going?"

"Why yes."

As she saw them she heatedly cursed in her mind. Oh, why her?

She wanted to back away now but she had no choice, Rennosuke escorted her onward, towards the couple. The man was wearing a black suit. The woman beside him was breathtaking in her red dress.

As they reached the couple Rennosuke stopped.

"Congratulations, Hisakata-san," he said, shaking hands with the demon-lord. "Soraji-corp.'s 10 years old now."

"Thank you for your congratulations Yorukawa-san..." it was then when his nose picked up a strong sweet scent he immediately recognised.

"And I see you too have a lovely companion... Hello, I'm Yorukawa Rennosuke, the head of Yorukawa corp."

"Pleased to meet you," the woman answered with a melodic voice. "I'm Tadachi Shizuki, Sesshoumaru's fiancée."  
Kagome was glad that she didn't slap Sesshoumaru then.

"And here's my girl, Higurashi Kagome."

Sesshoumaru had to grit his teeth to bite back the growl that had nearly escape from his throat when he heard this man claim the miko his.

Kagome leaned to Rennosuke's arm a bit more than was necessary as she extended her hand to shake Sesshoumaru's.

"I'm glad to finally meet you, Hisakata-san. Rennosuke-san has spoken only good of you." the miko awarded the human male with a tender smile.

_Oh, he was Rennosuke-san now, instead of "that Yorukawa-guy"? When had this happened?_ Deep in his mind Sesshoumaru pondered whether the miko was doing this on purpose.

With a forced smile for the bitch standing by the traitor's side, Kagome allowed Rennosuke to walk her further, into the actual party.

* * *

As she twirled on the dance floor she felt his eyes on her. She couldn't tell how she knew that the gaze that prickled on her skin was his, she just knew. She wondered why he was so fondly staring at her anyway; after all, he did have his _beautiful_ fiancée right by his side. A heated thought of revenge was burning in her mind. Well, if he was watching, better give him something to watch!

In the middle of the ball-room, in the middle of the waltz Kagome stopped and wrapped her arms around her partner's neck and tilted her head upwards, locking her lips with his.

After kissing Sesshoumaru, the kiss with Rennosuke wasn't that wonderful and pleasant but it wasn't a bad kiss either. She had experienced way worse kisses...

"Darling? Are you all right?"

Sesshoumaru did not answer. He continued to glare the pair boldly kissing on the dance floor, fighting against a strong urge to storm off at them, rip that Yorukawa into tiny pieces and then claim the miko's sweet lips himself, and telling to the whole hall of people that the miko was his woman.

"Sesshoumaru, you have been growling non-stop for minutes," Shizuki pointed out, nudging his arm. "What displeases you so greatly?"

"Nothing," Sesshoumaru barked out. "Care to dance?"

"Why sure!" Shizuki smiled brightly and the two inu youkais walked over to the dance floor.

_Cursed_, Sesshoumaru thought. _I just _didn't _think of her as my woman..._

'Told you you were falling for her.'

'Silence!'

'Still in denial? Fool.'

Kagome was no fool. As she watched the demon pair gracefully sweep over the marble floor her heart ached. It couldn't even be called 'dancing', what the two inu youkais did was even more beautiful, it was something divine. She felt a sting of jealousy. She wanted to be the woman who got Sesshoumaru's attention. She wanted to be in his arms. He was the one she really wanted to kiss... Sesshoumaru's betrayal for her had forced her to realise how deep her feelings for the cold demon lord were. She had not realised them grow but now the pain she felt in her heart, as she watched him holding his fiancée in his arms, proved it and there was no point denying it for those feelings certainly were there. Deep affection, something she could maybe even call 'love'...

But it would not matter now. He already had another woman. He had a fiancée. And Hitachi probably was right. The demon lord was incapable to love. He had been just playing with her. And that fact hurt her the most. Had he ever just wished to make her fall in love with him... Well, it seemed that he had succeeded.

"Poor girl." Shizuki whispered.

"What?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"That girl in that lavender dressing gown a few yards to the left from us."

"What about her?"

"Can't you see it in her eyes? Can't you sense it in her aura?"  
"Sense what?"

"That deep sorrow. It seems to veil those pretty hazel eyes of her... I pity her."

"She seems to be enjoying herself if you ask me," Sesshoumaru grunted, glaring Kagome's dancing partner.

"Maybe it's because you're male that you can't see it as I can," Shizuki said as she kept observing Kagome's face.

"I know that look she has in her eyes... I know that look that's on her face. Her face is a face of a woman whose love has betrayed her."

Sesshoumaru was struck by Shizuki's words.

"How can you tell?"

"I've seen a face of that kind a thousand times. I've lived long. Humans may change but on a primary level they're still the same. Really a shameful thing. Poor, poor girl..."

Sesshoumaru now watched Kagome more closely. She did not shed a tear but nor was she smiling. Was he to be blamed of this change..? No. He shook mentally his head and grimaced. He was not the one to blame. Probably there was just some quarrelling between her and her dear Rennosuke.

Oh how he wanted to kill the man on the very spot.

Oh and how easy it still was to deny one's own feelings and lie to oneself.

* * *

Shizuki was pacing before the window of her hotel-room. It was a clear night, no trace of clouds on the sky but yet her mind seemed to be in turmoil. It all seemed hopeless. He was so cold and distant. Well, she had known him for long so she knew how he was. He had always been like that. Maybe she had just thought he would have changed during the centuries... But no. He was still as much Sesshoumaru as ever. And still, something in him felt different. The only option she could think of was that he actually had found a woman worthy of his love. This irked Shizuki much. She was getting desperate! She needed... she _had to_ abide her father's will. Somehow. She had to teach that icy demon lord to love her... Maybe, if enough time given... But how much time? She didn't have forever. Shizuki stopped her pacing and threw herself on the soft bed, sighing. Something ought to be done. By the cold look he had given to her she knew he didn't like her. What was that she lacked? She knew his dislikes and she was nothing like them. She'd be his ideal mate! So why... Why did he refuse her? Couldn't he understand? She needed him to love her... Why couldn't Sesshoumaru see? Together they'd make a perfect match! Just like their fathers had planned. She had to come up with a plan of some sort. No matter what it would take... Sesshoumaru WOULD learn to love her.

Shizuki rose, a determined expression on her beautiful face. Yes. She'd have to do something extreme. Somehow she had to show him, to make him see, to convince him that she'd make a good mate... That together they'd be perfect. He would see.

Oh yes. Shizuki smiled. After this night there would be no way he'd refuse her anymore. She reached for her phone and dialled Sesshoumaru's number.

"Darling? It's me, Shizuki. I know it's pretty late already, but would you come over? There's something I want to show you..."

* * *

"How curious to meet at a time like this."

To her surprise it was he who spoke. Well, there really was no much choice since he was the only one there besides her.

The subway moved forward its bright lights making it hard to believe that it was already 1 am as they travelled through the tunnels.  
"Time runs fast when you're having fun," she replied, watching out of the window. She really didn't want to face him. She still was angry at him. She still was hurt. But that wasn't all. She still loved him.

The scent of sorrow heavily hung in the air in that little train compartment. What a conflict is what between those words of hers and her scent.

"I suppose you were with Yorukawa Rennosuke then?"

"Yeah... We were on the country side near Tokyo on a walk."  
"Why walk there?"

"Because there you could see stars. They were beautiful."

"So they have always been."

"I take it that you also were with Shizuki then?"

"Oh, yes. I went to pay her a visit."

Kagome clenched her fist. So paying her a visit late in the evening? She knew just too well what kind of _visit _that must have been...

The silence fell. Neither was sparing the other a look. The both were deep in their own thoughts. Neither of them couldn't speak out the words they wanted to. Kagome wanted to tell him about her feelings. Even though she knew he'd probably not care. But she thought if she could just tell him, then maybe the pain would ease a bit. Sesshoumaru would have wanted to tell her that Shizuki did not mean anything else than an annoyance to him. That no matter how hard the demoness tried no matter how desperate she was, no matter how extreme she went, he did not care.

"Kagome..."

She raised her head abruptly, staring at him wide-eyed. Never before had Sesshoumaru used her first name when speaking to her. It made her shiver to hear her name passing those lips.

"Kagome," he said again, "do you... enjoy being with him?" his voice was soft but it betrayed no emotion. His face held as blank expression as always. Sesshoumaru didn't want her to see how much the answer to his question would mean to him.

Kagome was startled. Was Hisakata-sama feeling quite all right? First he used her name, and then asked _such _a question... How could she be happy with Rennosuke? She only was with him to tick Sesshoumaru off... which seemingly wasn't working; after all, the demon lord was just on his way home in the middle of the night after paying a _visit_ to his fiancée. She would have wanted to feel happy for him, to find himself such an ideal mate. But somehow... She couldn't. No matter what, she didn't want him to know about her rash, childish plan to make the demon lord jealous with Rennosuke. Especially when it wasn't even working.

But then again, going back to his question... It wasn't unpleasant to be with Rennosuke. He was a considerate gentleman who was very nice and listened to her. She enjoyed talking to him. Truth to be told, she even liked him – not in any romantic way, though. Funny how she had thought he was creepy just a week ago.

She flashed a smile.

"I do."

He stiffened. She wasn't lying. He could sense it; he could smell that she was speaking the truth.

'Why do you care if she's happy with that guy?' the inner demon asked tone filled with sarcasm.

'I do not care,' Sesshoumaru replied automatically, but his words were weak, his tone was meek and he didn't believe those words even himself.

Inner demon left him in peace. Even though little, it still was a progress. He hadn't yet admitted but maybe soon... Maybe... Hope was a good thing to count on.

"And you, Hisakata-sama?"

"I think we've been through much enough together, Kagome, for you to quit on being so formal with me."

His golden eyes held her amazed gaze steadily.

"Se... Sesshoumaru..." the name rolled unsurely from her lips, a little blush on her cheeks.

"Better," he stated nonchalantly, his face free of all emotions.

"And you, Sesshoumaru," she continued, "Are you happy with her?"

"Happy?" No. I'm annoyed with her... "Yes."

Once again silence fell.

And then the train began to shake. The whole world shook, they flew from their seats to the floor, Kagome landing softly on top of Sesshoumaru.

The lights of the train flashed on and off for some minutes and then the trembling and shaking stopped and darkness swallowed the two of them.

"Wha-What's happening," Kagome asked in a trembling tone. The heavy scent of her fear filled Sesshoumaru's senses.

"I think that was an earthquake," he calmly replied. "And now if you'd please get off me..."

"Oh right, sorry..." Kagome rose up; happy it was so dark that Sesshoumaru wouldn't be able to see her blush.

His gold eyes glimmered in the darkness as he got up and slowly walked onto the door of the subway. He examined it for awhile.

"My unfortunate duty is to inform you that it badly seems that," he took a pause just to add a bit of dramatic effect. "We're stuck."


	21. Learn the hard way

**Disclaimer: **I think I've already made my point clear, ne?

Title is from my favourite band at the moment. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you: NICKELBACK!

**Chie:** To answer **Btittany**'s question (Single spark): _How Shizuki couldn't tell Kagome was pregnant but Kayade could? _Simple: As being inu youkai and all, naturally Shizuki DID detect from Kagome's scent that she's pregnant. Shizuki just didn't pay it too much attention because she's not interested in Kagome. And since at that moment Kagome was very much clinging to Yorukawa Rennosuke, Shizuki assumed that the baby was theirs.

**ALSO!** This chapter includes panicking people. Kagome and Sesshoumaru might be a bit OOC, but please try not to mind it that much... After all, Kagome's in kind of a shock and panic-state... And Sesshoumaru's just desperate and "why me"-ish... Anyway, you'll laugh. Then you'll cry. Then you'll hate me. But I hope that you'll still be able to continue reading this fic.

**Chapter twenty – Learn the hard way**

"Wh- WHAT! What do you mean we're stuck?"

Sesshoumaru winced as the woman's loud shriek hurt his sharp ears.

"I suppose it means that we can't get out of here. Just keep it calm."

"Calm? I'm perfectly calm," Kagome answer, her voice teetering at the edge of panic.

Sesshoumaru sighed. _Out of all the people, why...?_

"Oh Kami!"

Sesshoumaru winced again.

"Would you mind keeping your voice down," he groaned.

But the woman obviously didn't pay attention to him.

"I'm too young to die!" she wailed, helplessly clinging to the metal pole.

"You will not die," Sesshoumaru replied calmly, annoyance flickering on his pale face. "We are just stuck here, that's all."

"Stuck! We're stuck! Oh Kami I don't want to starve to death..."

Sesshoumaru sighed rather heavily.

He muttered under his breath something that sounded like: "Ningens and their hysterical behaviour..."

"KYAAAA ! I'LL DIE!"

Her loud scream hurt him so much that he flinched.

"SHUT UP," Sesshoumaru roared.

The panicking woman fell silent. He watched as she trembled. Without the support of that pole she'd probably had collapsed to the floor. Tears began to form in her eyes and their heavy salty scent filled the air that was surrounding them. Sesshoumaru inhaled deep and for some reason it made him feel a tad bit sad.

The miko broke down into sobs and with one rush movement let go of that pole and landed with a muffled thud against Sesshoumaru's chest. Her small fists grabbed tightly the cool material of his shirt and she buried her head in his chest. She was trebling and sobbing.

Sesshoumaru stood there, frozen, not knowing what to do.

"Kagome..." he whispered softly.

"I don't want to die here! I don't want to die..." his delicate ears picked up her muffled wailing.

He sighed.

"You won't die, Kagome."

"I'll die in here... It's over... Everything's over... Tell Kayade that she can have my clothes... And tell Souta that he will have Shue... And tell..."

"You won't be dying," Sesshoumaru replied louder.

But Kagome didn't listen to him. She went on and on, babbling that gibberish of hers. After six and half minutes of listening to that – he had tried to shut his ears but it didn't seem to work – he was growing rather desperate.

"Kagome, please, calm down..." he cut in.

"Since I'll be dying here anyway it doesn't matter anymore, does it?"

"Kagome..."  
"Nothing matters anymore, right? So I might just as well tell it to you..."

Kagome tilted her head back so that she was looking into Sesshoumaru's amber eyes.

He looked frustrated. She had still tears in her eyes.

"Sesshoumaru..."

"Yes?" _Please tell me that she's calmed down and is herself again..._

"I love you!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened in shock. Had he just heard –

"I love you," she sobbed out again.

"Uh, Ka – umph!"

Her tongue boldly invaded his mouth.

Sesshoumaru gripped her shoulders and pushed her away.

"Kagome, calm down now, will you! You're in some kind of shock, you have no idea what you're saying and – "

"I know perfectly well what I'm saying –"

"You're dating Yorukawa now, so –" he cut in angrily only to be interrupted by her again..

"I only date him to make you jealous!"

For the first time in his life, Sesshoumaru was out of words.

_Since... when..._

'Your plan seemed to work,' the inner demon muttered. 'Congrats.'

'I doubt she means that, after all what I – '

'She might be hysterical but she's not insane, Sesshoumaru. Use your nose. She means it.'

Sesshoumaru swallowed. It felt as if a large chunk would be stuck in his throat.

'Pal,' the inner demon stated gloomily, 'we're falling for her.'

'No', Sesshoumaru answered sighing, 'I guess we've already fallen.'

The inner demon fell into a silent shock.

"Kagome, please. We can talk about this later," Sesshoumaru said gently. "Just calm down for now."

"Oh come on, Sesshoumaru," she breathed in his ear. "I'm dying here, so you ought to at least make my last moments enjoyable..."

To his horror Sesshoumaru noticed that the miko's hands were opening his belt.

'Okay, she's lost it!'

'I think she's right, Sesshoumaru, you ought to make her last moments – '

'You say that just because you're a desperate horny bastard! I need you to co-operate with me now – for once!'

'Wow, you ask me to co-operate with you? How can I help you, my dear other self?'

'You know any way to bring her back to her senses?'

'Hmmmh... Well... Try slapping her?'

Not getting any better ideas, Sesshoumaru did as he was told to.

He caught her right before she fell onto the hard floor.

'Well that was just splendid,' the inner demon muttered heatedly.

'What are you complaining about? It was _your_ idea,' Sesshoumaru growled.

'Yeah but you hit her too hard, idiot!'

'You suggested it!'

'Yes! Suggested! I wasn't screaming to you: "Slap her, Sesshoumaru, slap her!" was I?'

'Oh shut up...'

'What are we going to do now?'

Sesshoumaru gave out a strange sound – it was something in between a groan and a sigh.

'I have to admit that I have no idea...'

* * *

When Kagome came to, she didn't immediately remember the past events.

_Where am I? It is dark in here. Wait! Is this floor?__ No, this feels softer, as if.. Warm... That's so warm.. Like.. Oh shit!_

Her eyes shot open and first thing she saw was a pair of amber eyes which gazed down at her.

"Are you feeling any better?" the demon asked a frown on his beautiful face.

"Yeah. I'm okay."

"I'm glad."

"Ummm... Sesshoumaru-sama..? What happened? Where are we?"

'Yup. You hit her WAY too hard.'

'Shut up.'

"We're in a subway-train. There was a little earthquake and we are now stuck in here."

"Oh... I remember now..." Her voice trailed off and a few moments later she blushed rather heavily as she remembered how hysterical she was.

"Erm, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Yes?"

"I'm so, SO sorry."

"About what?" he asked. Sesshoumaru looked at her flushed face and inhaled her scent. Nervousness and embarrassment.

"About.. ehh.. about.."

"You don't have to apologize," Sesshoumaru cut in. "You were not yourself back then."

"Thank you", she said, eyes downcast. Then she raised her head and flashed him an unsure smile.

Sesshoumaru reached out with his clawed fingers and gently brushed a raven lock of hair behind Kagome's ear. The blush on the woman's face deepened and she tried to get up – though she couldn't, Sesshoumaru was keeping her down.

"Stay right where you are."

"Umm.. Why?"

"Because I feel comfortable like this."

"Can I at least sit up?"

He nodded and Kagome rose into a sitting position taking a quick look in the dim train-compartment around them. Sesshoumaru was sitting on the floor, his back leaning against the white wall. She had been resting in his lap and now secured herself up, moving in to a nicer position, leaning her back against his chest. She had no idea why Sesshoumaru insisted keeping her in his lap, but if that was the case, she had absolutely no complaints!

Sesshoumaru wrapped his arms around her form and at first she stiffened. But soon her eyes fell shut and she sighed.

"Are you not good there?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"No, on the contrary," she replied, a smile on her face.

"Good," he breathed out. He lowered his head to rest on hers and buried his nose in her hair, inhaling her scent.

She was now positive that her face was burning red and her heart beat so fast that she was afraid that it would burst out of her chest. There was also a nerving tenseness in her lower abdomen. The tension only intensified and she couldn't help squirming.

"Is everything all right." Sesshoumaru asked, his breath fanning the skin on the side of her neck.

"Yea, for a while I just – "

And then it hit her. It all started from her lower back, the burning twinge of pain moving on to her abdomen, making the pool of tension to boil. She had to hold her breath because the sudden pain was so strong that it prevented her from breathing.

Sesshoumaru felt the woman stiffen in his arms. Something was not right now.

"Kagome?"

"It hurts."  
"What?"

And then, as suddenly as it had occurred, it was gone.

"N- Nothing."

Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow. He didn't quite believe her

Kagome relaxed again and snuggled closer to Sesshoumaru.

Time passed in the darkness of the train when they just sat like that, close to one another.

Kagome had nearly forgotten about the sudden attack of the pain when it returned. This time it was sharper and it hurt even more. It was like someone would have thrust a knife in her lower back and stabbed her with it several times. A knife that was burning her inside. Once again this pain expanded into her lower abdomen. Kagome couldn't bite back a whimper as she doubled over.

Sesshoumaru's accurate demon senses were yelling at him. Something wasn't right now. He could tell that she was frightened and that she felt very uncomfortable, as if something would be hurting her.

The pain was all over her. She was so intently wrapped up in that pain. It was impossible to breath. It was impossible to think. It was impossible to do anything else than just dwell in that burning sensation... It hurt so much that she hoped she would just die.

Few droplets of sweat appeared on her brow. Distantly she felt Sesshoumaru's large hand soothingly stroke her hair.

She took a deep breath once the pain had again vanished suddenly. She got up from Sesshoumaru's lap and started to pace between the rows of seats.

"Want to tell me about it?"

"A pain you couldn't imagine just suddenly hit me... And after awhile it faded away. Then it happened again after sometime."

Sesshoumaru frowned.

"That's odd."

"I know... I've never felt like that before."

"Do you have any hunch of what could be causing it?"

"No, I – " She shrieked and fell onto the floor. She panted heavily, resting on her knees as the same pain engulfed her once again. Sesshoumaru was in an instant by her side but she didn't notice.

Although this time something was different. This time...

The pain faded.

"Sesshoumaru," she breathed out, her voice filled with fear.

She whimpered and fell against him, sobbing.

"Kagome, what is it?" he asked sharply.

"It's the... I'm... My.. My water just broke."

Sesshoumaru's eyes shot wide open. It took some time before her words got through.

"Kagome... You're barely on your fourth month."

"I know!" she wailed and buried her face in his shirt-covered chest.

"I'll call the doctor," Sesshoumaru said gravely, soothingly caressing her back with long strokes.

He took out his mobile phone and dialled Doctor Usugi's number as fast as he could.

"Kira-san, it's emergency," he said the moment she picked up.

"Who is this," mumbled the Doctor's sleepy voice.

"It's Sesshoumaru."

"Lord Sesshoumaru? You know it's not even 3 am yet..."  
"Kagome's water just broke."

Kira was immediately up.

"What?"

"Kagome's water just broke," Sesshoumaru repeated. "And I think she has had three contractions now."

"It's way too early for her to give birth," she mumbled to herself, her voice telling that she was startled. "Where are you now?"

"Stuck in a subway-compartment on Touzai-line. I think the last station we passed was Gyoutoku."

"Oh no... The earthquake from earlier, is it? It woke me up... All the power's out."

"This isn't good!" Sesshoumaru growled.

"I know. Now, I need both of to calm down and relax. You stay there. I'll come there as fast as I just can."

"All right – "

"If the interval between contractions decreases to something like every minute or two, then call me again. I'll be on my way there."

With that, the otter-demon-doctor hung up.

Sesshoumaru focused completely on Kagome again. She was lying on the floor. Sweat was glistening on her forehead and she had closed her eyes.

"Kagome," Sesshoumaru called out gently as he kneeled down next to the woman.

She opened her eyes. She saw he had a frown on his face and worry glimmered in the depths of his golden eyes.

Kagome flashed a smile and extended her hand. Her fingers brushed Sesshoumaru's cheek.

Not saying anything the male pulled her head into his lap.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

Sesshoumaru took her hand in his.

"I failed."

He knew she wanted to say more so he stayed quiet, waiting for her to speak up again.

"Even though I knew all the time... That you wouldn't want to have anything to do with a hanyou pup... With my pup... Somehow I still always believed that you could grow to love the child. But I have failed even in bringing him to the world properly."

Silent tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Kagome, you don't have to be sorry," he said quietly but yet firmly. "It is not your fault. None of this is."

"Then why," she asked, her voice rimmed with pain. "Why is this happening?"

"I don't know," he answered. His left hand still held hers while he ran his right hand through the miko's hair.

Contraction came again, making her flinch and yell.

Sesshoumaru held on to her, whispering soothing words into her ear.

* * *

Time passed, with them lying close to each other, Sesshoumaru trying to calming down the crying woman. But as the contractions became more frequent and there still was no sign of Doctor Usugi, the tables started to turn. When the interval between the contractions was every minute or two, Sesshoumaru took out his mobile phone.

"What the hell is keeping you," he growled immediately when the woman picked up.

"I was just about to call you. Since I live quite near the Kagurazaka-station I figured if I try to get in and then follow the Touzai-line up the where you are... But I can't get in."

"Kagurazaka? That's too far away from here."

"I know that, okay? What's wrong with you now?"

"I'm frustrated. Is there really nothing you can do so that you could be here in five minutes?"

"I'm sorry, but that's impossible."

"But the pup will be born soon!"

"Then you must aid Lady Kagome in the labour, my Lord."

"Me!"

"Is there anyone else in there to help her?"

"No, but – "

"That's what I thought. Now, give the phone over to Kagome."

Inwardly cursing he passed the phone on to the miko.

"H-hello?"

"Hi Kagome-sama, it's me, Doctor Usugi."

"Oh, hi."

"How's it going?"

"Uhm.. Quite well. Save for that I'm stuck in a subway-compartment and about to give birth although I'm barely on my fourth month..."

"Well assuming that you can still joke you must take this rather calmly," Kira congratulated.

"There's no point to panic, this is all natural, right?"

"Exactly," Kira smiled. "Now, I needed to warn you in advance."

"About what?"

"About Sesshoumaru. Between demons it has always been strictly forbidden for males to be present when the female is giving birth. And all the males – no matter the character, the specie or attitude – always become nervous in a labour."

"You mean Sesshoumaru would be nervous?"

"No, I'm actually quite sure that he'll panic."

"What!"

"In a situation like yours everything seems hopeless. He's the only one who can help and he doesn't know how. For males, giving birth to a new life is always referred as something mystical, it makes them very nervous. And then, also we have to consider Sesshoumaru's natural demon instincts. The smells are weird, the sounds are disturbing him, he will be confused. So I want you to be ready for that. You have to be strong for you both. Can you do this, Kagome-sama?"

"Yes... Yes, I can do this."  
"Good. Now give the phone back to Sesshoumaru-sama. I need to give him instructions."

Kagome gave him the phone and watched the demon closely. It was true; he wasn't quite his calm self now. And then came a contraction again and she concentrated only to herself. She was calm all the time. This was in her nature. Giving birth to a child was something that every woman knew automatically how to do it.

He felt helpless, and it was not a feeling he enjoyed. The smells were unfamiliar to him and it unnerved him. Only scent he knew was the coppery tint of blood – and that didn't ease his mind at all. The mix of all the aromas together was nearly making him sick. He could very well tell that she was in pain and yet he couldn't help at all. He paced around and hoped that a miracle would happen and Doctor Usugi would suddenly appear. Males shouldn't be around females giving birth. It was unnatural! Sesshoumaru had lived long. He had travelled a lot. He had seen more than any other living being... but nothing, **nothing** had prepared him for _this_.

* * *

"Sesshoumaru," Kira's voice called, "what's the situation now?"

"Too many unfamiliar scents."

"Sesshoumaru," Kira replied more firmly, "how is Kagome doing?"

"She's sweating.. And hurting.. And I can't take her pain away," he whimpered.

_Males_, Kira sighed to herself, rolling her eyes.

"And how is the pup doing?"

"I don't know and I don't want to know. Come to take me away from here!" he whimpered again.

Oh great. So he was panicking. And it seemed that his hold of his inner demon was weakening.

"Can you see the pup yet?"

"You want me to LOOK at that!"

"No, you _have to_. Now stop being a cry-baby and be a man."

"If I acted like a man I wouldn't be here at all," he snarled.

"You should co-operate with me, Sesshoumaru. You're the only one who can help her."

"I don't want to help her!"

"So you readily accept that because of you, Kagome might die!"

He whimpered.

"Is she dying? Is she?"

"Most probably if the pup isn't delivered correctly and you refused to help her."

Kira usually didn't lie. But if an emergency occurred, all was fair. And this was an emergency. Kagome's life wasn't in danger at all, but she needed Sesshoumaru to help her.

"I don't want her to die," he whined.

"Then you must help her to deliver the baby!"

"I'll help her! ... But I don't know what to do!"

"Look if you can already see the baby."

Some moments rolled by before he spoke again.

"Yes, I can see the pup's head."

"All right. Sesshoumaru, you have to move over to Kagome and be ready to receive the baby when it comes out. Can you do this?"

"I think so."

"Good. Now, concentrate on her only. Understood?"

"Yes."

* * *

One thing was sure. After been through that ordeal, Sesshoumaru promised himself never to look down on a female again.

"The pup's out! I'm holding our pup."

Kagome smiled weakly.

"You ought to tell that to Doctor Usugi," she reminded him. Although giving birth to the baby had took nearly all of her concentration, every now and then she had heard parts of his conversation in phone with Doctor Usugi. She had nearly started laughing. Panicking Sesshoumaru was something... peculiar.

"Hello, doctor Usugi. It's all over now."

"The pup is born?"

"Yes!"

"Good. Now, Sesshoumaru, clean him and wrap him up and prepare yourself."

"Prepare? Prepare for what?"

"The placenta."

"What's that?"

"It's an organ inside Kagome to which the pup is connected and through which he gets his food. It will come out as well quite soon."

Sesshoumaru groaned. Why the females had to be so complicated?

* * *

It all was over. For the whole time she hadn't thought about it so much but now... Now she was holding him. Her baby. Obviously the demons developed differently. Kira had told that he barely had any powers or senses, he was blind and he was so small... But from the outside he was almost fully developed. He had all ten fingers and all ten toes, ending up into soft little talons. He was pale and he had a tuft of white hair on his head. And most of all, he was dead. Kagome sniffed and then began to cry. Sesshoumaru was in a second at her side. He picked up the miko still holding their baby.

"Usugi," he said into the phone, "I'll get us out of here. Be ready in your office."

His once cold heart was aching when he watched the miko lying in the bed. It was now 6 in the morning. She had stopped crying hours ago, but after that it had only got worse. Now all she did was to stare at the dead infant and whispering soothing words to him. She had refused to give him up. Usugi said she wasn't going mad. She said it was only natural. Sooner or later she'd let the poor pup go and he could take her home.

* * *

"You should be standing over there, by her bed."

"Somehow I still have the feeling that I don't fit in."

"Nonsense. You're the father, are you not?"

Sesshoumaru sighed.

"Why," he simply asked.

"No one knows. Sometimes these things happen without any reason. I have a hunch though... Has she been in a stress lately?"

Sesshoumaru flinched.

"It's more than possible."

"Well then... You are not mated to her, right?"

"That's true."

"I have a theory... I do not have much experience in mikos carrying demons' pup, but... I suppose if she was in a stress her miko blood could have started thinking that the stress was because of the demon child she was carrying. So it decided to make the problem go away and signalled her body to start to labour."

Sesshoumaru nodded gravely.

"And another thing, as you probably noticed. The pup was a full youkai. Although I cannot quite tell why."

"I can," Sesshoumaru said, his eyes still on the depressed little miko.

"It was the Shikon no Tama."

Doctor Usugi nodded.

"That'd explain..." the doctor fell quiet and watched the expression that was on the demon lord's face.

"Just go," she said, hiding her smile. "She needs you now."

Sesshoumaru nodded and walked over to the bed, where Kagome was lying.

"He's so small," she whispered.

"I know."

"I'm so sorry."

"You don't have to be."

"I wish I could just – "

"Kagome," he interrupted softly, "could I hold our pup for awhile?"

When Kagome heard him finally admitting out loud that he was the father of the pup, the tears appeared into her eyes again. She nodded and started crying.

Sesshoumaru sat at the edge of the bed and took the baby in one hand. The other hand he wrapped around Kagome. The woman clung to him, trembling, crying and sobbing.

Kira watched the mourning family for some time. Then she sighed and closed the door. They needed to be alone for now.


	22. Listen to your heart

**Disclaimer:** The title is the one from Roxette's song! Awww...

**Chie: **Yes. The baby's gone. I did what I felt I had to. At least it made our ice-prince to finally stop beating around the bush, ne?

I want to thank all who understand why this was done. And I want to thank all who don't hate me now. –bows-

**Chapter twenty two – Listen to your heart**

The news always travel fast. This time, it all began when Kayade called to Kagome, wondering why her friend didn't show up at work. The fact that Sesshoumaru answered Kagome's phone made her suspicious and she didn't let him go until he had told her everything. Once she found out the sad news she immediately called her mother. Then she informed Shaere-san why Kagome wouldn't be coming to work. Shaere again called to her sister and told the whole thing.

That was why now, after Kagome had been home for only little over half an hour, people started to swarm in. They came in little groups. Sesshoumaru had placed her on her living room sofa and was at that time in the kitchen preparing a cup of tea for her. Kagome was lying on the sofa, wrapped up in a blanket and pondering over Sesshoumaru. The demon's behaviour surprised her. He had been exceptionally considerate and gentle. Kagome thought it was very sweet of him, although she only thought it was because he found himself guilty of the situation. Then her thoughts flew back to the little baby born too early. He had been so helpless. So small. So vulnerable... And lifeless.

However, before she had more time to think about her lost child, the door opened. Kagome raised her head.

The dark haired woman had tears in her eyes as she approached the sofa. She sat down on the edge of the sofa.

"I'm so, so sorry, sweetheart."

Kagome swallowed. She looked at her mother, who was crying. She had cried all her tears already. Eyes full of sorrow she hugged her mother.

Sesshoumaru stepped in then, carrying two teacups. He saw the two women hugging each other. He felt another presence in the room and his gaze flew quickly to the doorway. About 16 years old young man was still lingering there, leaning against the doorframe. He looked at the demon lord rather curiously. Then his eyes moved to look at his mother hugging his sister, crying. Then he glanced at the unfamiliar person again.

Sesshoumaru couldn't help smirking as he saw the boy roll his eyes at the scene. He might learn to like this kid.

"Mom," the boy called out, "give her some air, will you?"

Kagome freed herself from her mother's embrace.

"Souta?"

"Yeah, 'tis me. Long time no see, sis."

So the miko had a little bother.

Kagome spotted Sesshoumaru, standing with the teacups.

"Thank you, Sesshoumaru," she said, smiling. It pained him to see the smile didn't quite reach her eyes.

Wordlessly he gave the teacups to the two women, inclining his head to acknowledge the presence of Kagome's mother.

"Oh Kagome!"

All head turned to look at the doorway – Souta had forgotten to close the door.

Rin walked in, followed by her husband.

"I'll go and make more tea," Sesshoumaru decided calmly and turned around disappearing into the kitchen again.

"Huh? Why is Sesshoumaru-sama here?" Hitachi wondered out loud.

"I don't know," Kagome admitted. "But he's been a huge help. Without him..."

Rin pulled a chair next to Kagome's sofa and sat down. Kagome started to tell her mother and friend the whole story again.

After that it soon became crowded. Yuka, Eri and Ayumi were next to arrive. They didn't stay for so long though. Souta left too, mumbling something about a football practise.

Little after Souta and the three girls had left Kayade came in; followed by someone Kagome hadn't expected to see.

"Ayame-chan! What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you of course," she replied smiling. Her smile faded as her face grew more serious. "How are you doing?"

"Better now. It's very sweet of everyone to come to see me."

"You'd do the same thing," Kayade said smiling.

"But how did you know," Kagome frowned.

"Kayade told me."

"You know Kayade?"

The red-headed wolf glanced at her daughter. They both smirked.

"I suppose it hasn't ever really come up, has it?"

"Nope," the blond girl answered.

"Kagome-chan, meet my eldest, Shirakawa Kayade."

Kagome's jaw dropped as she looked from one woman to another. They could have been mistaken for sisters!

"But.. But.."

"But what?" Ayame asked.

"Kayade's about my age, isn't she?"

"Uh... about..."  
"How old are you then, Ayame-chan?"

Ayame flashed a sheepish grin.

"Mom, I suppose we could tell her."

The Lady of the Northern lands nodded.

"Kagome, you know about Sesshoumaru being a demon, don't you?"

"Yes..."

"Well, it's not like he's the only demon around," Kayade said.

"You mean..."

Both women nodded. Then they dropped their sealing spells.

Immediately their nails grew to claws, their ears became pointed ones and two white tails appeared.

Mrs. Higurashi nearly fell off from her chair. What peculiar friends her daughter had!

Kagome caught a sight of Rin's face also. The small secretary was smiling.

"You knew," slipped out of Kagome's mouth as she realised that Rin didn't look surprised at all.

Rin flashed an apologetic smile.

"Okay... Anyone else in here who hasn't confessed about being a demon!" Kagome felt a bit hurt. She could understand though why her friends had not told... But still.

Her words broke the conversation that had been going on between the males. Kouga and Hitachi lifted up their heads.

"I confess," Hitachi smiled, dropping his sealing spell.

"Guilty as charged." Kouga dropped his sealing spell as well.

Kagome sighed and buried her head into her hands.

"Why me," came her muffled voice.

Rin chuckled and patted the miko's shoulder.

"It doesn't matter whether we are humans or demons, does it?"

"Of course it does not matter," Kagome answered, lifting up her head. "I just wish you had told me."

"But we just told you now." Ayame hugged her friend tightly.

* * *

It was already late when Kagome was again alone. She yawned and closed her eyes.

"Do you want to go to sleep?"

She nearly shrieked.

"Sesshoumaru! Sheesh, don't do that again."

The demon raised his eyebrow.

"I thought you had gone like the others."

"And leave you here alone?"

Kagome blushed.

"Now, do you want to go to sleep?"

"Yes."

Not warning in advance the demon lord scooped her into his arms and started to carry her towards her bedroom.

She was about to open her mouth to question why he was doing this but then she decided that it was best to keep quiet. She sighed happily, snuggling closer to him. In his arms she felt safe. She did not need to know why he was acting like this. It was enough for her that he was.

He set her on the bed.

"Anything you need?"

"Uhm.. no."

"Good," Sesshoumaru brushed some stray locks from his face and took off his shirt.

"Uhm.. Sesshoumaru?"

"Yes?"

"What are you doing?"

"Getting ready for bed, obviously."

"You're going to stay over?"

"I thought I already told you that I'm not leaving you alone."

Kagome blushed.

"Or would you want me to rather sleep on the sofa?"

"No. I.. I mean.. I feel... safer if you're here with me."

"As you wish."

Sesshoumaru pulled the blanket over her form.

"Sleep," he commanded quietly.

A moment later Kagome felt his weight settle on her left side in the bed. She forgot her sorrow. Knowing that he was near made her feel comfortable and happy...

It didn't take long until she was fast asleep.

* * *

Sesshoumaru watched her sleeping form. How vulnerable she looked in her sleep... Humans. But nothing was going to hurt her. He would protect her. No matter what. He heard the soft, content purr from his inner demon. His thoughts flew to the conversation from before.

"_I bet you're happy now, Sesshoumaru," Kouga spat out, not bothering to hide his accusing tone. "The stain in your perfect reputation is gone. You won't father a half-breed." _

_What surprised the wolf demon was Sesshoumaru's reaction._

"_Don't call my son a half-breed," he growled, a hint of crimson in his eyes._

_Kouga stole a side glance to Hitachi._

"_Let me take care of this," the neko said calmly. "You have a good heart, Kouga, but you're too rash."_

_The wolf inclined his head in recognition._

"_Tell me what happened, Sesshoumaru. All we heard was that the pup was lost."_

"_Doctor Usugi thinks it's the stress she's been in that activated her miko blood." _

"_I thought that her powers were sealed as well as her memories," Kouga frowned._

"_The seal already has a few cracks. It's nothing big but enough to let some of her powers through."_

"_Let us not dwell in the matter of the seal," Hitachi_ _softly reminded. "What about the pup?"_

"_Usugi says that the miko blood might have thought that the cause of Kagome's stress was the demon pup. And to relieve Kagome from that stress and to protect her..."_

_Hitachi_ _set his hand on Sesshoumaru's shoulder._

"_I'm sorry."_

"_I wish that that had been the worst part," Sesshoumaru said quietly, watching off to a distance._

"_Is there still more?", Kouga asked._

"_He.. My son... He was a full youkai."_

"_No way." Kouga gasped. "How?"_

"_There's only one option I can come up with; Shikon no Tama."_

"_What are your plans as for now," Hitachi_ _inquired, looking closely at the elder demon._

_Sesshoumaru's gaze wandered to rest on the miko who was surrounded by three of her friends and her mother._

"_I'm going to take care of her and watch that she doesn't fall into ruin. I'll help her through her sorrow."_

"_And then what? Will you leave her side?"_

"_No. I'll stand by her side 'til the end."_

_Kouga's jaw dropped at that point._

"_And what about Shizuki," Hitachi_ _pressed._

"_I don't love her," Sesshoumaru replied coldly._

"_Then there is someone whom you do love?" _

_Sesshoumaru sighed. The neko wouldn't leave him alone until he had confessed._

"_Yes."_

"_And that person is...?" Hitachi_ _knew damn well who that person was. But he also knew that he had to make the dog demon to admit it out loud._

"_Kagome. I love Kagome."_

_Then the dog demon turned to look at Kouga._

"_And you, wolf, shut your mouth. You look even more like an idiot than usual."_

_Hitachi_ _just smiled._

"_It's good to hear that you finally can admit your feelings to yourself."_

_Sesshoumaru looked at the Southern Lord sharply. By his comment it seemed that he had already known.. _But how? Was I that obvious?

"_I'm glad that you were able to find your heart." Hitachi_ _bowed his head in respect._

"_Honey, we're leaving!" Rin's voice called._

"_In a minute," Hitachi_ _replied. He turned to speak to the inu youkai for the last time._

"_And you better tell that to her too." With one last smile he was gone. Kouga soon walked away too, after inclining his head in respect._

_While Hitachi_ _was in the car, driving home, he spoke to his mate._

"_We might as well start to prepare for the mating ceremony soon."_

"_Oh don't remind me of that Shizuki... I'm sure that she's nice and all, but.."_

_Hitachi_ _chuckled._

"_Sweetheart, I ain't talking about Shizuki. I'm talking 'bout Sesshoumaru's and Kagome's mating ceremony."_

Damn that clever neko. Had he seen through him for the whole time? Sesshoumaru sighed and stared intently at the woman lying next to him. He brushed a few stray locks of raven hair from her face. Maybe he should sleep too.

With that thought he closed his eyes, allowing the sleep to claim him.

* * *

Kagome woke up to the sounds of someone rummaging through her kitchen. She yawned and stretched and got up. In her pyjamas she walked out of her bedroom and stopped in the kitchen doorway.

The red-haired woman probably knew she was there, considering the fact she had learned to know from yesterday. She saw her white tail swishing back and forth impatiently.

"Ayame-chan? What are you doing here?"

"Making breakfast for us," the wolf replied cheerily. "Now where do you keep your plates?"

Mutely Kagome pointed at the right cupboard.

"_Why_ are you here?"

"I was asked to, honey. Now just go and sit down. You'll get to fill your tummy soon enough." With a smile showing off her canine fangs she turned back to work on the breakfast.

Feeling very much confused Kagome walked over to her dinner table and sat down. It was then when she spotted the note that was lying on the table.

"_Kagome, I'm sorry but there is some important business I need to attend to. I'm sorry for leaving you so early. I told Ayame to come over so you need not to be alone._

_I promise to return as soon as I just can._

_Sesshoumaru"_

Kagome just gawked at the message for awhile. She read it several times through just to confirm that she had got it all right. First of all, he was apologising his absence? Second, he had taken care of that she didn't have to be alone? And third, he promised to return.

_Woah, is the hell freezing over or what_, Kagome mused over to herself. It certainly didn't sound of the usual behaviour of the icy inutaiyoukai.

* * *

"Sesshoumaru!" Her pale yellow eyes widened.

"Let me in, we need to talk."

In a loss of words she complied, letting him step over the threshold, into her room.

"Have you considered my offer?" She tilted her head to the side, platinum blond hair cascading gracefully over her shoulder.

"Not so much. A lot happened since we saw each other last time."  
"Like what?" she had her eyebrow raised.

"Like the fact that I was blessed with an heir on the same night I last walked out of this building", he breathed heavily out.

Her mouth hung open. Had she missed something?

"An.. An heir!"  
"You wouldn't know, would you?" his pinned the female with his golden glare.

"Before you showed up here there was a woman I courted. A woman who was carrying my pup."

"I... I did not know.."

"That I am very well aware of," Sesshoumaru cut in coldly. "And two nights ago the pup was born, months too early and dead."

She could but gawk at him.

"As I realised how much that pained me I finally admitted myself something I had been putting off for far too long."

She waited in silence for him to continue.

"I don't love you," he barked out. "I never have. My affections lie elsewhere and that is why the deal is off. You will never become my mate, Shizuki."

Whatever reaction he had waited from the inu bitch, the dog demoness caught him completely off guard.

She started to cry. And as the large crystal tears rolled down her cheeks her lips lightened up in a smile...

Shizuki threw her hands around his neck, burying her head into his chest.

"Thank you, Sesshoumaru... Thank you so much."

She unlatched herself from him and just look at him, smiling.

Her tears were the tears of joy.

"Well this is not quite what I expected," Sesshoumaru said dryly, his left eyebrow raised.

Shizuki chuckled, wiping her tears away with her long clawed fingers.

"Sorry, Sesshou-kun, you never really were my type."

"Then why did you suddenly show up, trying your best to make me take you as my mate?"

She smiled sheepishly.

"I really messed up things, eh? I'm sorry..."

Sesshoumaru did not answer but waited for her to continue.

"I... I felt guilty. I felt like I had betrayed my father and I needed to make it up to him. I never wanted to disappoint him. Hell, I never planned any of it to happen..."

"Sometimes we can't choose on who our affections lie," Sesshoumaru said smoothly.

Shizuki smiled.

"We are the same, you and I."

"You should go back to him. And tell him how you feel."

"So should you go to her."

For a while they stared at each other. Then, they both bowed their heads in acknowledgement of each other at the same time.

* * *

When he stepped in he was immediately hit by wave of sorrow and the salty scent of tears.

Kagome was crying again. Ayame held her, trying in vain to calm her down.

Sesshoumaru closed the door quietly. He knew the Lady of the Northern lands knew he was in the room even though she didn't raise her head. The demon lord walked over to them and sat down on the sofa on the other side of Kagome. He set his hands on her shoulders and pulled the miko gently to his lap. As he held the crying woman against his chest he looked over to the wolf demoness. Their eyes locked, emerald with cold. He let out a quiet bark. Ayame nodded and rose, walking over to the kitchen.

When she came back with the cup of camomile tea, Kagome had already stopped crying and calmed down. She had her eyes closed as she rested her head on his shoulder, inhaling his scent. He ran his fingers through her hair.

Ayame stopped in the doorway, just looking at the pair. He had his eyes closed as well. Ayame smiled to herself. Amazing how Sesshoumaru had changed.

_This is how it should be,_ Ayame thought to herself. She walked quietly over to them.

"Here Kagome," Ayame spoke out softly, offering the teacup.

"Thank you," Kagome replied hoarsely and sat up in Sesshoumaru's lap, taking the cup.

Ayame sat down on the armchair.

"So where did you go?" she inquired from Sesshoumaru.

"I went to see Shizuki."

Kagome stiffened in his lap and the red head wolf saw her knuckles turning white when her gip of the teacup tightened.

"I believe it was about time you two discuss things through," the wolf replied calmly.

Sesshoumaru nodded.

"Shizuki's leaving the town. She's returning to Kyoto."

Ayame smiled.

"That I'm glad to hear."

"I'm afraid that I'm not quite following," Kagome admitted rather stiffly. "Why aren't you running after her?" she shot the demon lord with a cold glare.

Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow.

"Obviously I'm staying here by your side. Therefore I don't have time to run after childish inu bitches. Not that I even wanted to do that."

"What does your _fiancée_ think about you being here with me," she retorted, emphasizing the cruel word.

"And what about the will of your father?" Ayame asked softly.

"Actually Shizuki told me that I should come back to you. And my father would understand my decision if he would see this situation I'm in."

"So you're not.. like.. engaged anymore?"

"I think I'll leave now," Ayame said smoothly, getting up. She walked over to the door.

"Take care, Kagome. Bye." with that, she was gone.

Sesshoumaru turned his intense golden gaze into Kagome.

"No, we are not engaged. It would have been a poor match."

"What do you mean? You're both strong, demons, emo – "

"We didn't love each other," Sesshoumaru cut in. "And with your mate you'll have an eternal bond. Did you think I would have wanted to make that kind of a bond with someone I feel nothing for? Besides, both of us had someone else who held our... affections."

"Oh so you are both two-timing idiots too? That's just sweet. You share the same hobby already!"

"Kagome..."

Her eyes flashed angrily and she opened her mouth to say probably something more sarcastic. What she was supposed to say then, he never found out. Not that he cared though.

Kagome's eyes widened as he pressed his lips on hers.

The kiss worked as he had hoped. When he pulled back she was staring at him still wide-eyed and mouth hanging slightly open. A ghost of a smile was on his lips as he tapped Kagome's nose with his long finger.

"My silly little Kagome," he breathed out.

She slowly blushed under his intense golden gaze. He chuckled and bent his head down to kiss her again.

* * *

"Souta? What are you doing here?"

"Babysitting you I suppose," the young man grunted and stepped in.

"Surely you didn't walk all the way here?"

"No, your boyfriend dropped me off."

"Sesshoumaru? But he left earlier saying he had some business to attend to and..."

".. And he appeared behind our door some time ago. Asked mom and Jii-san politely to come with him."

"What?"

"Yeah, you heard me. And then he told me to come over here. He said you shouldn't be left alone."

Kagome barely registered what Souta now said. Her mind was in a total confusion. What was going on? What was Sesshoumaru planning?

* * *

They stepped in and immediately stopped. The room was decorated so that it felt as if they had stepped hundreds of years back in time. There were people in the room, all dressed in silken kimonos. She could but stare. What was going on?

She turned to look at the silver haired demon standing behind her.

He nodded, gesturing them to step in.

She let her gaze travel. Most of these people she had met at Kagome's apartment the day before.

There was a group of three. Tall black-haired male, a red-haired female sitting elegantly on the floor on his right, and younger female with blond wavy hair sitting on his left side. Next there was a tall dignified-looking woman she did not know. She had long ebony hair and reddish brown eyes. There was a smirk playing on her ruby lips. The last ones were a small woman with midnight-black hair sitting next to a tall male who had long honey-blond hair.

The old man gasped.

"Demons!"

The tall black-haired woman sitting right before them, dressed in a rich emerald green kimono decorated with silver embroidery, laughed.

"That is correct," she said.

"Abi. So the word already reached you," Sesshoumaru said quirking his eyebrow. He was dressed in blue and white kimono, his old blue and yellow obi tying it.

"Yes... Miyame-san hinted that I should be getting here."

"I don't want to interrupt or anything," the black-haired wolf male, in red and white kimono, said, "but shouldn't we start with the ceremony? We can all catch up later, you know."

"Always so patient," Hitachi chuckled. He had on a kimono which colours were white and purple.

Abi cleared her throat.

"Very well, we shall begin." She turned her reddish gaze to the two humans standing before her.

"Are you the closest relatives to this one Higurashi Kagome?"

"Yes," they answered, not really knowing what was going on.

Everybody sensed their nervousness.

"Do not worrym" Hitachi said smiling reassuringly. "Kagome-san is all right. This is but a formality we have to go through as the demon lords of the Japan."

After hearing that, they relaxed a bit. As much as one can relax in a room full of demon lords and ladies.

"And you hold the power to hand this Higurashi Kagome over?"

"Yes."

"Y.. Yes.."

"Lord Sesshoumaru of the Western lands, step forward and voice your request."

Sesshoumaru took a few steps forward. He bowed his head to the wolves, to the bird and to the cat. Finally he bowed his head to the two humans.

"I, Sesshoumaru, Lord of the West hereby announce that I am willing to tie this eternal bond to this Higurashi Kagome and take her as my mate."

The humans now gawked at him, while the demons gazed at him steadily.

"And do you promise to treat her well?" the Lord of the Northern lands asked.

"I promise."

"Do you promise to let others know that she is your equal?" the Lady of the Eastern lands asked.

"I promise."

"Do you promise to let her know about you affections towards her?" the Lord of the Southern lands asked.

"I promise," Sesshoumaru answered.

Abi nodded gravely and then turned to look at Mrs Higurashi and Kagome's grandfather.

"You have stated that you have the power to hand over this Higurashi Kagome. I now ask you: Are you willing to hand this Higurashi Kagome over to Sesshoumaru, the taiyoukai of West?"

Mrs Higurashi raised her head. She looked straight into Abi's eyes.

"I'm willing to hand her over to Sesshoumaru."

All gazes in the room now turned to study the old man.

He sighed. The idea of his precious granddaughter marrying a youkai was enough to make their ancestors roll over in their graves. Well, at least his dear grandchild got herself a taiyoukai.

"The decision is Kagome's," the old man spoke. "But if she accepts this taiyoukai of West, I'll gladly hand her over."

Abi nodded.

"And what does the Lord of the Northern lands say?"

"I, Lord Kouga of the North, speak also on behalf of my mate, Lady Ayame of the North, and of my daughter, Princess Kayade of the North, as I declare that Lord Sesshoumaru has my permission to take this Higurashi Kagome as his mate."

"And what does the Lord of the Southern lands say?"

"I, Lord Hitachi of the South, speak also on behalf of my mate, Lady Rin of the South, as I declare that Lord Sesshoumaru has my permission to take this Higurashi Kagome as his mate."

"And what does the Lady of the Eastern lands say?" Sesshoumaru asked, looking closely at Abi.

The taiyoukai of the East smirked.

"Do as you like, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru smirked back. He always did as he liked.

"Lord Sesshoumaru of the Western lands. You have heard our voices. You hereby have the permission to take this Higurashi Kagome as your mate. That is if – and only if – this Higurashi Kagome herself is willing to be your mate. The ceremony is over."

* * *

It was her first day in work since losing the baby... And it had been after a hell of a fight with Sesshoumaru. The stubborn demon lord had refused to let her go to work, saying she needed to rest. She wasn't sick. She didn't need to rest. Besides, lying on that sofa all day, having nothing else to do than think... Think about her lifeless little demon child.. It was unbearable. So, she had called to Doctor Usugi, who had admitted that allowing Kagome to go to work wasn't a bad idea. Having something to do would keep the deep depression away from her.

She was on her way to kitchen after taking an order from a customer. She was supposed to go and let Shaere-san know what the customer wanted. However, she never made it to the kitchen because on her way there she froze.

In the doorway was standing a guy she knew.

"Sesshoumaru?"

What was he doing here? If he was planning to drag her back home she'd so show him... Before she had a chance to speak up, he moved.

The demon lord walked over to her and for a moment stood before her, watching her intently. Then he changed his position. His large hand engulfed hers as he kneeled.

Kagome blinked several time until she finally realised what was going on. All action in the little restaurant had stopped. Dozen pairs of eyes were staring... Staring at them.

_I must be dreaming,_ she thought. _Dreaming about going to work again and Sesshoumaru walking in and.. and now he's kneeling before me... What a weird dream._

Sesshoumaru sighed silently and allowed his talon to sink into the soft skin in her paw.

"OUCH! You idiot, what was that for!"

"Just making it sure you know this is happening for real," he answered dryly.

She paled.

Kayade came from the kitchen and stopped abruptly, taking in the sight of Sesshoumaru kneeling in front of Kagome. The pair seemed to have forgotten all about the rest of the restaurant. It took all Kayade had not to squeal excitedly out loud and break the illusion.

There were very few moments when the Lord of the Western lands had been nervous, but his was one of them. He had never done this before and therefore he was not quite sure how to put it all out in right words.

He took a deep breath.

"Kagome.. I know I've been... " he paused, trying to find a right word.

"A total ass?" she filled in for him.

"Well you can also put it like that..." he grumbled. "In any case, not too long ago I was forced to see how ill and dishonourable my behaviour towards you has been. I beg for your forgiveness."

"Is that why you're on your knees?" she asked bluntly, a frown on her face.

"Not quite," he answered dryly.

"Then cut the crap, Sesshoumaru, it's not like you. Just get to the point. Besides, I'm kinda busy you know. I'm trying to work here."

"As you wish, milady, I'll go straight to the point."

She swallowed nervously at the expression in his eyes.

"Kagome," he started, locking her gaze with his, "Will you allow me to make you my mate?"


	23. Nothing else matters

**Chie: **I'd like to clear that the ceremony in the last chapter was NOT mating ceremony. It was merely a proposal ceremony. The true mating ceremony will be in next chapter.

**Chapter twenty two – Nothing else matters**

She was lost, once again. That amber stare of his reached for her soul and pulled it out, trapping it into the warm depths of his eyes. She swallowed slowly. She was aware that somewhere in the distance her hand was in his, swallowed by the paler and larger hand. He was on his knees before her, patiently waiting for her answer.

Her answer to the question he just had stated.

She was glad that she had not been holding anything for she was sure that she would have dropped it in the moment he spoke out those words.

It had taken quite a while until the words had sunk in. First she thought he was kidding, but no, that thought vanished from her mind soon enough. Sesshoumaru didn't probably even know how to kid. That left only one option.

He was being serious.

And if he was being serious, then...

Kagome was very grateful her knees did not give in. So she just stood there before him, eyes wide, and mouth hanging slightly open. She held his intent gaze as well as she could.

As she continued to stare at him in the ongoing silence, his nervousness but grew. He could tell by her scent that the miko was very much surprised. Being so close to her made her scent stronger and he breathed it, bathing in its sweetness.

For one short, terrible moment he thought she was going to refuse him. She had once before refused him, yes, but that time it had been his primitive beast asking the question. He had treated her poorly and he felt guilty for all the trouble he had ever caused upon her... He was going to make it all up to her. All the pain he had ever caused her, he was going to make it all up.

If she only let him.

Moments spent with Sesshoumaru, the good and the bad memories, all now played themselves before her eyes. He had been a jerk. More than a jerk. King of ALL the jerks, damnit!

But...

His behaviour for the past two days had been something she had not seen before. If he would stay that way...

He had been constantly by her side – or if he could not, he had at least made sure that there was someone with her. He had totally ignored his own business, staying in her small apartment instead of his own spacious and pretty one. It meant a lot to her. Every time she had started to cry, he had pulled her into his arms and just let her cry it all out. Let her tears wash the pain away. With him by her side...

And then of course, there was the fact that she loved him. Yes, she had fallen. She didn't know how, didn't know when, but answers to the questions did not matter now. It had already happened.

And he knew.

In her hysterical state, thinking she was dying anyway she had just spilled it all out – Kami-sama! She had been so embarrassed later... Before... Before _it_ had happened taking all other thought out from her mind.

And he had stayed by her side nonetheless.

Yes.

Her hazel eyes looked back into his golden ones. They were no more blank and emotionless. There was a spark of life in them. She rather liked them that way.

Slowly a smile began to rise on her lips.

"Oh get up from there; you'll just get your pants dirtied."

Sesshoumaru blinked.

"Besides kneeling doesn't quite suit you, my lord, although I have to admit that I kind of like the view."

Sesshoumaru blinked again.

"But – "

Without a warning the miko tugged his hand. Automatically he obeyed, rising from the floor.

"Perfect," she breathed out, now smirking. "Now I can express my answer."

He was about to ask what the hell she was going to do but had no time. The impact came without a warning, taking him totally by surprise. Had he not been Sesshoumaru, he would have fallen on the floor on his back rather ungracefully.

But, Sesshoumaru he was, and thus remained standing.

The miko had latched herself onto him. Her legs were shamelessly wrapped around his waist and wit her hands she had grabbed his cheeks, pulling his lips against hers...

It felt like forever, one sweet, emotion filled forever...

Then their lips parted and she slid to the ground, standing now right before him. Smiling she raised her gaze into his eyes.

"That," she said rather breathlessly, no wonder after such an impressive express of a kiss, "was a yes."

"I figured," he mumbled satisfied and bent down to kiss her again.

At that point, the restaurant couldn't keep it quiet anymore.

It exploded into a storm of applause and cheering, which finally brought the two now engaged ones out of their own world into this one with the other people.

Kagome smiled sheepishly, watching the cheering customers.

Then she was hit by a blond lightning.

"Congrats," Kayade cried out.

"Kayade-chan, you're squeezing a bit too tightly..."

The girl smirked and let go. She turned to look at Sesshoumaru.

"You know, it was about time, Uncle Sesshy."

The demon lord couldn't help chuckling.

"What on Earth is going on in here?"

Shaere-san had come out of the kitchen, hearing the noise from the restaurant.

Kagome had a huge smile on her face.

"Aunt Shaere, I just got proposed!"

"Again?" the dark-haired elder woman shook her head, smiling too. "Congratulations, child."

"Thank you."

"And before you even ask, take the day off. I know you wouldn't handle things very well here anyway due all that has happened lately..."

Kagome hugged the woman.

"Thank you, Aunt Shaere!"

"I'll cover for you," Kayade winked.

"Let's go then," Kagome squealed, latching herself onto Sesshoumaru's arm.

"You might want to take off that apron before we leave," he pointed out.

Kagome blushed a bit and took off the garment.

Kayade took it from her.

* * *

Once they were out Kagome realised something.

"Hey, where's my fancy ring?"

"What fancy ring?" Sesshoumaru asked innocently.

"You know – Engagement ring!"

"You've only been my betrothed for five minutes and already want jewellery? I should have known it was because of the money..."

"You're no fun," Kagome wailed and started to pout.

She looked adorable when she pouted.

_I have to do this more often_, he decided to himself.

"My apologies," he said, his eyes twinkling.

"Oh no mister, you won't be forgiven that easily."

"I assumed that, that's why I was prepared to bribe you... with this."

Kagome cast a look from the corner of her eye. Seeing what was lying on Sesshoumaru's palm made her squeak and turn, fully facing him now.

"Give me your hand."

She obeyed.

With an admiring sigh she watched the ring now decorating her left ring-finger. It was plain silver, save for a one deep blue sapphire in the shape of a crescent.

"It's beautiful."

"It was my mother's," he replied.

"Thank you," she breathed out, smiling.

* * *

It had been ages since he had last time held the girl in his arms. She had changed since then. He had changed since then. Everything had changed.

He let out a barely inaudible sigh and let go. The girl smiled and took a step back.

"Thank you, Kouga-kun."

He nodded, smiling as well. His gaze wandered off to the dog taiyoukai who stood close.

It was about a time, certainly!

The feel of sorrow still hung to the girl's aura but it had weakened since the last time he saw her.

All thanks to Sesshoumaru.

The club was neat and not too crowded. The bar-counter was cosy and they played good music. Kouga smiled to himself.

Of course it had all been Rin's idea. No one else could have suddenly decided that Sesshoumaru's and Kagome's now official engagement needed to be celebrated some way. And that was why they were here, in the club. Even Abi had showed up, much to everyone's surprise. The bird demoness was dressed in a low-cut red shirt and classy black slacks. At the moment she was sitting on a high bar-stool, sipping her drink every once in a while.

Ayame was standing by his side, her long hair cascading her back in soft waves. She had on a white fluffy sweater and pleated denim skirt.

Sesshoumaru had now moved to stand near the wall, dressed in dark blue jeans and blue shirt. He watched the dancing crowd, an arm loosely wrapped around Kagome's shoulders. The miko was clad in a short black pleated skirt and light blue long sleeved shirt.

Kayade, Rin and Hitachi were out on the dance-floor, seemingly having the time of their lives.

A smile rose to Kouga's lips. Tonight, life was good. Ayame seemed to agree, for the wolf demoness let out a content sigh and leaned slightly on his arm.

"Oh come on!"

"No."

"Why not?"

"This Sesshoumaru does not dance."

"Please..."

He inwardly cursed when he stared into those pleading hazel eyes. He could have sworn that he saw a glimmer of an unshed tear in them. He felt utterly helpless before those eyes and he did not like it one single bit. 'The Look' wasn't exactly unfamiliar to him, after all he _had_ raised Rin. Remembering how his ward had adored this miko five hundred years ago, he couldn't help but think that maybe it had been the miko who had taught Rin 'the Look' in the first place. He was a dog demon, damn it! Those puppy eyes shouldn't affect him like this...

But they did.

"Fine," he said with a heavy sigh.

"Yay," the girl squealed and dragged him over to the dance floor.

"Oh look at that," Kouga mumbled under his breath to his mate.

Ayame giggled softly.

"I'm so glad he made a right choice."

"Would you care to dance, my lady?"

"Only with you, my lord."

It wasn't that bad. The song was rather slow and he really liked the way his mate-to-be was pressed against him. Yes... this dancing was not bad.

Though, he was not going to let the miko know that.

When the song ended they wandered off to the bar counter. Abi had finished her drink.

"Are you having good time, Lady Abi?"

"No formalities, Kagome-san, after all, you are to become my equal."

Kagome inclined her head, smiling.

"As you wish, Abi-san."

"Phew, now I'm thirsty!"

The two demons and one miko turned their heads and saw the cheery wolf-princess.

She was soon followed by her parents.

"I think I'll order too," Kouga said, eyeing the drink list.

Sesshoumaru grunted.

"You're getting nothing?" Kagome asked.

"I survive without drinking."

"Oh, but you must order something, Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Everyone turned and saw Rin, a huge smile on her face and her hand resting on Hitachi's arm.

"Otherwise I can't keep a fancy toast speech."

Sesshoumaru just stared at his secretary.

"Please?"

Somehow he got the feeling of dejá-vu. These eyes weren't hazel but dark brown, but they held the same, heart-tearing pleading look.

Now he was suddenly sure of it, the miko had thought this damn trick to his ward.

"Fine," he complied again. Inwardly he cursed women with their stupid tricks and huge pleading puppy-eyes.

Soon everyone was holding a glass.

"To Kagome-nee-chan, who managed to do the impossible and tame the wild dog," Rin started, ignoring completely Sesshoumaru's glare.

"And to Sesshoumaru-sama, who finally found his other half. May you find your happiness together. Cheers!"

As the group was sipping down their drinks, the DJ announced that the big karaoke was about to start.

"Awh, Karaoke!" Rin squealed excitedly. The little human turned to the others in the group.

"Did you know that Sesshoumaru-sama can actually sing?"

Kagome and Kayade shared a quick glance and hid their smiled behind their hands. Neither of them had quite forgotten the "Narita Ken" incident.

Kouga, Ayame and Abi just stared at Rin, doubt clearly showing in their eyes. Somehow none of them could picture Sesshoumaru-sama, singing.

"It's true," Rin pouted.

Abi raised her eyebrow.

"Yeah right."

"Sesshoumaru-sama, you should go to sing!"

"Yeah, you should, Sesshoumaru," Kagome joined in.

It was then when he already knew he had lost the battle. He knew the secret weapon they were about to use.

Blast, it was the third time in fifteen minutes... And still he couldn't deny.

"Please?" the two soft voices pleaded. Both girls aimed their adorable puppy eyes at him.

One pair of those eyes was too much for him, seeing them both at the same time...

"Fine," he sighed. This just was not his day.

Both girls squealed and latched themselves onto him.

He watched them both. The two mortal women, the only ones ever to pass the thick barrier around his heart. Whatever made them happy... Singing just one stupid song in that karaoke was worth to see them smile.

"I can't go unless you two let go of me," he pointed out.

The two unlatched themselves immediately. He grunted and got up from his bar stool and walked away. Some minutes later the first notes of 'Gou' echoed through the small club.

Kagome closed her eyes as his deep voice started to sing. They fluttered open a bit later, taking in the sight. She still couldn't quite believe that he was all hers now. He looked so beautiful beyond words, and his voice was divine.

'I have to make him to sing for me more often,' she decided as her fingers absently traced the silver rim of the engagement ring.

Kouga's eyes had widened the moment Sesshoumaru had started to sing and he could but stare. Ayame's hand was covering her open mouth.

"Oh my," the rather shocked wolf demoness mumbled.

But if someone was shocked, it was Abi. She stiffened when his voice filled the club.

'No, please tell me this isn't happening,' she muttered in her thoughts, horror-struck. She knew that voice. After hearing Ken Narita's single for the first time, she was completely lost. She had actually bought third CD of the single 'Gou', since the first two she had listened all through, literally. After hearing about the singer's death she had cried her eyes out. She had been wearing all black as a sign of her mourning for like a month.

And now the harsh truth was revealed.

'What bad have I done?' she sighed to herself and closed her eyes.

The song ended and the club exploded into applause. A moment later Sesshoumaru arrived. Kagome got up from her seat, greeting him with a soft kiss.

"Thanks," the miko smiled.

"Well, you can sing all right," Kouga muttered.

Kayade broke down in giggles.

Abi just glared at the inutaiyoukai rather grimly. Then she ordered herself a new drink.

* * *

Weeks passed. The visiting taiyoukais did not leave Tokyo, save for Abi who went to her home for a while, but it didn't matter for she lived in Mito which was very close to Tokyo in any case.

Doctor Usugi Kira called Kagome to come over for a check up after six weeks of the miscarriage had passed.

"Everything's all right," the doctor told smiling. "You'll be a fine mother someday."

"Thank you for everything, Doctor Usugi!" Kagome hugged the otter demoness.

"Just call me Kira."

Kagome smiled.

"I heard about the engagement, congratulations."

"Thank you, Kira-san."

"We should see each other soon enough," the doctor winked. "You're young and fertile and about to get mated."

Kagome blushed slightly.

The motherly doctor smiled. The human child was so sweet. It seemed that all the long centuries the Western taiyoukai had spent alone had paid off. He would get the best mate possible.

* * *

"You know, I've been wondering for quite a while that what exactly you are doing here."

Sesshoumaru raised his eyebrow.

"You wish me to leave your apartment?"

"No, that's not what I'm talking about, silly."

"Then what are you talking about?"

"I mean why are you – and Hitachi-san – here in Tokyo? Shouldn't you be on your own lands?"

"It does not matter that much anymore," Sesshoumaru answered. "Only demons recognise the titles and humans have long since outnumbered us. We don't own the land anymore. That's why I can live wherever I want. I have an apartment in Kyoto though. I have lived in Tokyo only for 10 years or so. Same goes with Hitachi."

"Where Hitachi-san used to live?"

"In Osaka."

"So close? That's sweet."

"Hmmh. West and South have been close allies, ever since I gave Rin to the young lord Hitachi."

"Still, it sounds a bit funny. Cats and dogs close allies?"

"Believe it. They were allies before my time too. They say that the Lord Kogane of the neko-clan gave his daughter to Lord Shirone of the inu-clan..."

"Ehh? Was this Lord Shirone your father?"

"No, he was my grandfather."

"Well that explains a lot," she muttered to herself.

He quirked an eyebrow in a silent question.

"Well... These things skip a generation, don't they? I mean, you're arrogant, silent, rather mean and you prefer to work alone. I have thought many times that you're more of a cat than Hitachi is... Wait; does this mean Hitachi is related to you?"

"He is my cousin."

"Now why haven't I heard of that before!"

"Welcome into the family," Sesshoumaru muttered under his breath.

A short silence followed.

"What kind of a person was your mother?" Her fingers were again tracing the silver ring.

"She was a real lady. Tall, beautiful and proud but yet gentle and loving. She was the daughter of Shirone of the inu-clan, Lord of the West, and Chiyo of the neko-clan. My mother had the blood of the both royal clans within. She was silent, calm and graceful. Her scent was fresh and sweet, like summer rain and honey. Her voice was melodic and smooth. I remember the evenings when she came into my chambers, sitting on the edge of my bed and softly singing for me until I fell asleep..."

"And her appearance?"

"That I can't remember," Sesshoumaru replied. "She died when I was still young, and I can't really remember much."

"I'm sorry to hear that," she said softly, placing her hand on his arm.

"Don't," he said quietly. "I want you to be happy, not sorry."

"With you I am happy," she answered, gracing him with a smile.

"Then I am glad."

* * *

She lay silently by his side. His eyes were closed but she knew he wasn't sleeping. She watched her own fingers which were running through his silver hair. Steady, soft, rumbling sound came deep from his chest.

"You know darling, that purring is quite adorable," she whispered with a giggle.

The soft sound stopped immediately.

"This Sesshoumaru does not purr," he answered, not bothering to open his eyes.

'Sure you don't,' Kagome inwardly rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, Fluffy."

"Woman, do not insult me."

"I'm not insulting you, demon."

"If that was not an insult, then what was it?" he had now opened his eyes and the amber glare was aimed at her. However, he didn't seem to be quite as angry as his words made believe.

"It was a nick-name, obviously."

"You won't use such a nick-name anymore."

"Or else?"

"I will have to find a way to quiet you."

"Was that a promise," the miko asked, eyes shimmering of mirth.

"Might as well be."

"In that case... Fluffy."

He reached out with his arm, gripping swiftly the woman's shoulder and jerking her down from her sitting position. His hand wandered to rest on her lower back, pressing her body against his as his tongue invaded her mouth. The kiss broke finally and Kagome gasped for air.

"Your punishment does not work," she muttered sleepily. "If you do _that_ every time, you will be sure that I will call you Fluffy whenever I feel like it."

"Maybe I'll suffocate you next time," Sesshoumaru smirked.

"You wouldn't dare."

"Don't be too sure of yourself."

"Oh look who's talking..."

* * *

She was sitting in the corner of her sofa. Her eyes were closed as she was inhaling the scent. No one made as good tea as Sesshoumaru. The taiyoukai was sitting in the other end of the sofa. Kagome's cat Shue was curled up on his lap and he stroked its fur absently with his claws.

It was then when the doorbell rang.

Kagome frowned, wondering who it was. She set her teacup on the table and got up. Sesshoumaru's eyes followed her as she walked over to the front door and opened it.

"Hojo-kun! What a surprise!" Kagome blinked a few times, watching the man in front of her. Why was he here?

"Sorry that I didn't inform you beforehand, but I just heard and needed to see you."

"Heard about what?"

"Your engagement."

"Oh... that..." Kagome blushed slightly. After all, she had been seeing Hojo for two years and well, just look what all had happened then.

Hojo smiled.

"Congratulations," he said softly.

"Thank you, Hojo-kun."

"Oh.. And Kagome-chan, you don't have to worry about me anymore." Hojo turned and gestured for someone to come.

Shue lightly jumped down from his lap as Sesshoumaru got up. He arrived to Kagome's side at the same time as the tall elegant woman appeared to Hojo's side.

Kagome blinked a few times whereas Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes.

"Here's my fiancée Yameko Kagura," Hojo introduced the woman standing by his side.

"Pleasure.. to meet you, Yameko-san."

Kagura smiled at her. Both of the women very well remembered that the last time they had met. Kagura would have killed the miko had Kayade not decided to interfere. Maybe it was because of that that it felt rather awkward to suddenly meet the crazy fan-woman like this. Maybe it was also because Kagome very well remembered the whole "Sesshy-darling"-incident. Sesshoumaru however calmly stood by Kagome's side, his face not revealing his surprise.

"I'm Hisakata Sesshoumaru," he introduced himself, for the gawking miko still was not seemingly able to utter a word. "I'm Kagome's fiancé."

"Nice to meet you," Hojo smiled.

Kagura just looked at Sesshoumaru.

"Well well, it seems that you were finally able to find your heart."

"Same goes to you, Sesshoumaru."

Kagura and Sesshoumaru quietly nodded to each other in a silent acknowledgement.

Sesshoumaru let out a quiet, content growl. It seemed that no one would disturb his and Kagome's peace anymore. And that was exactly how he wanted it to be.


	24. My happy ending

**Disclaimer: **Avril Lavigne, people. XD This song just fits like a... well, whatever matches well with something.

**Chie: **The day you've all been (impatiently) waiting for... Dundundundun! Three or four weeks have passed!

**Chapter twenty-three – My happy ending**

"Would this one look better here, what do you think?"

Mrs Higurashi tilted her head, appraising.

"I think it should go there, yes, Rin-san."

The black-haired small woman flashed a brilliant smile.

"You will do the ceremony and stand in the eastern side. Sesshoumaru and Kagome-chan will be facing east. I will stand with Kouga on the north side and Rin and Hitachi will be facing us."

"I know, Ayame-chan, I've been well-trained," Abi muttered.

"Sorry. I'm just so happy."

"Everyone is, Ayame-chan. We have been waiting for this day for centuries."

Kagome stood in the centre of it all. The taiyoukais had done the preparations very well and the courtyard of the shrine was beautifully decorated, although the decorations were not yet complete. Rin and Kayade were taking care of that, working together with her mother. Her aunt Shaere had kindly prepared food together with Abi who turned out to be an excellent cook. Who would have guessed?

"Kagome-chan!"

Kagome flinched at hearing her name. She had been deep in her own thoughts. Tomorrow was the big day. Tomorrow already...

"Yes, Ayame-chan?"

"Come with me and Abi. It's time to change."

Kagome quirked her eyebrow – a habit she had picked up after living with Sesshoumaru too long.

Neither one of the two demonesses answered her unspoken question. Kagome shrugged and followed them inside. They led her up the stairs into the room that had been hers before she had left her home behind to live on her own.

"Here," Ayame said softly and smiled at Kagome. "I finished it last night."

Kagome gasped at the sight.

"But Ayame-chan! This is beautiful..."

"Thanks, I did my best," she answered with a wolfish smirk.

"Now let's get you changed, Kagome-san."

It fit perfectly.

"It really suits you," Abi praised.

"Sesshoumaru's eyes will pop out," Ayame snickered.

"I would not like that," Kagome replied, smiling. "I like his eyes."

"Oh yes, they're pretty eyes – when he's not glaring."

"Ayame-chan, that wasn't so fair."

"Truth is hardly ever fair, Abi my friend."

* * *

Kagome closed the door behind her. She took off her shoes and walked to the big and well lit living room. She sat down on the sofa and snuggled against the big fluffy pillow. Kirara and Shue appeared from somewhere, both cats mewing for her attention. Kagome chuckled.

"And where were you?" a husky voice asked.

Kagome turned to see Sesshoumaru.

"I went to check upon the preparations."  
"You need not to worry. They know what they are doing."

"I know... But I just wanted to look."

"My curious little Kagome." Sesshoumaru smiled and sat down next to her.

"Now where were _you_, mister?"

"I had to go to a meeting held in my office and after that I had some guests to receive."

"Guests?"  
"Well after all the mating ceremony _is_ tomorrow, little darling. And I still am the Lord of the Western lands. A few demons of the West have arrived to be witnessing the mating ceremony."

"More demons? Great. Grandpa will be delighted." Kagome muttered.

Sesshoumaru chuckled.

"Do not worry. Everything will go just fine."

"And the rehearsal?"

"There's still time before that," he assured, picking Kirara up to his lap.

"But there will be rehearsal, right? I don't want to screw anything up tomorrow in front of the audience."

"Do not worry, my dear Kagome."

"Sesshoumaru..."  
"Yes?"

"Why is Abi doing the ceremony?"

"It's a tradition," Sesshoumaru answered. "Besides, for the circle to work, the East must face West."

"The circle?"

"The circle that represents the bond you will share with your mate. A circle will be drawn onto the ground. The taiyoukais will all stand on the frame of the circle. East in eastern side, West in western side, North in northern side and South in southern side."

"Oh..." Kagome frowned.

"You'll understand better once you see it," Sesshoumaru assured. Then he got up.

"We should get going now."

"What? There's still an hour before the rehearsal starts."

"Precisely. An hour time to take my beautiful mate-to-be out for a dinner."

"Liar. You just want to show me off," Kagome smirked.  
"So what if I want?" Sesshoumaru teased her back and offered his arm. "Shall we?"

* * *

Kagome stood in front of the mirror. She was dressed in the azure coloured silken kimono which Ayame had made. The silver embroidery glimmered in the dim light of her room. Her midnight black hair was arranged in an old fashioned style, which too was done by Ayame's hand. She looked like a hime from centuries ago. It felt funny, to see herself dressed like this. Somehow it seemed to remind her of something. Remind.. But about what? She could not quite grasp it. The throbbing ache started to spread behind her eyes and she hissed in pain.

"Kagome? Are you all right, sweetheart?"

"Yes mama.. I'm fine," she managed to answer, smiling despite the pain she felt inside. Somehow.. For some reason.. Her heart felt hollow.

"Are you nervous?"  
"A bit, yeah," she answered, turning back to watch her reflection in the mirror.

"Everything will go just fine."

There it came again. The same line Sesshoumaru had been repeating to her the day before. Could it be.. Had Sesshoumaru tried to convince himself with those words? Was he feeling nervous, too?

"I'm sure it will," Kagome replied softly. She turned away from the mirror.

"You look so pretty," Mrs Higurashi said, gazing her daughter.

"Thank you."

A strangled sound escaped from her throat and she took few rushed steps to close in their distance. She pulled her daughter into a tight embrace.

The sudden gesture surprised Kagome completely.

"Uh, mama, some air.."

The woman smiled and let her arms fall to her sides.

"I'm glad to see this day."

"So it doesn't bother you?"

"What would bother me?"

"Mom, I'm about to marry a demon here!"

"So what? He's a really considerate, nice young man. And I have to say, if I were any younger... He's an excellent catch," the elder woman admitted, a hint of mischievousness in her gentle eyes.

"Mama!"

Mrs Higurashi laughed merrily.

"You should hurry, dear. Father is waiting."  
"Jii-chan... How is he taking this all," Kagome frowned.

"Father cares not even if Sesshoumaru is a demon. After all the choice is yours. He only wants you to be happy."

"Mama..."

"Yes, dear?"

"Thank you for everything," she whispered, hugging her mother.

"Go, my dear. They are waiting you."

Kagome smiled and left from her room. In the stairs she met her grandfather.

"Are you ready, Kagome?"

"As ready as I can be, jii-chan," she answered, placing her hand on his offered arm.

* * *

She walked down the aisle, escorted by her jii-chan and her mother. All three stopped when they reached the circle. Abi was in the east corner, the Goshinboku right behind her back. She was facing the guests gathered in the courtyard. Sesshoumaru was standing with his back to the crowd, facing Abi. Kouga and Ayame were standing in the left, in the northern side as Hitachi and Rin stood opposite to them. Mrs Higurashi recognised their traditional kimonos immediately; they were the same ones they had worn in the earlier ceremony as well. The colours probably represented the lands they were ruling. Good thing Kagome had happened to hook up with the Western Lord. Blue really suited her.

Mrs Higurashi bowed at the same time with her father.

"Higurashi Kagome," called out Abi's melodic voice, "enter the circle and take your place on the side of your future mate."

Kagome bowed gracefully and took a step forward, stepping on the fine line in the ground.

"Unite thy hands like thy souls shall be united on this day."

Sesshoumaru took Kagome's small hand in his own. Their fingers intertwined. Sesshoumaru squeezed her hand reassuringly.

"Look closely at this pair, my people, for they shall never be apart again. On this day thou shall witness how these two souls will be bound together, united, 'til the end of times comes and 'til death doth them apart.

Lord of the South, raise thy voice!"

Hitachi turned his head to stare at Sesshoumaru.

"Lord of the West, do you swear before these people that what you say is all the pure truth?"

"These words I speak come from my very heart. They are as true as the red blood in my veins."

"Lord of the West, do you swear before these people that what you say will be said by your own will alone?"

"These words I speak are mine. My free will agrees with my heart."

"Lord of the West, will you raise this woman to be you equal?"

"This woman shall rule by my side and will be known as the Lady of the West throughout all Japan."

"Lord of the West, will you protect this woman from any danger?"

"I shall protect my mate. My own life I am willing to sacrifice, for her to gain a chance to live."

"These vows thou have made, these vows thou must not break," Hitachi said.

"Lord of the North," Abi called, "raise thy voice!"

Kouga turned his head to stare at Kagome.

"Lady of the West, do you swear before these people that what you say is all the pure truth?"

"These words I speak come from my very heart. They are as true as the red blood in my veins", Kagome replied clearly.

"Lady of the West, do you swear before these people that what you say will be said by your own will alone?"

"These words I speak are mine. My free will agrees with my heart."

"Lady of the West, will you abide to the will of thy mate?"

"My mate is my lord, him I shall obey."

"Lady of the West, will you grant an heir to the Western Lands?"

"I will bear the child of my mate and he shall be the heir to the Western Lands and the heir to the inu-clan."

"These vows thou have made, these vows thou must not break," Kouga said.

"Lord of the West," Abi called, "Doth thou love this woman."

"I love this woman from all of my heart."

Kagome bit her lip, not to shed the tears glimmering in her eyes.

"Lady of the West, doth thou love this man?"

"I love this man from all of my heart."

Sesshoumaru squeezed her hand tighter.

In the front row, Mrs Higurashi was wiping her tears away with a tissue. On her left side Souta sighed in annoyance.

"South and North, step forward!"

Hitachi and Kouga walked across the circle. Hitachi stopped before Sesshoumaru and Kouga before Kagome. Both lords bowed shortly to the pair. Then Kouga raised his hand to gently rest it on Kagome's inky black locks. Hitachi's hand was placed on top of Sesshoumaru's head.

"Lord of the West, art thou willing to take this female as your mate and give her your heart, your life and your soul?" Abi asked.

"Kagome will be my mate."

"Lady of the West, art thou willing to take this male as your mate and give him your heart, your life and your soul?"

"Sesshoumaru will be my mate."

"Lord of the South, raise thy voice!" Abi commanded.

"I will bless this male!" Hitachi spoke loud and clear.

"Lord of the North, raise thy voice!"

"I will bless this female!" Kouga said gently.

"I will bless this union," Abi declared. She bowed to Sesshoumaru and Kagome. Then she straightened herself to all of her height and spread her arms, now looking at the crowd. "Behold! The binding shall be made!"

Hitachi raised his hand and something followed with it. It glimmered with pure silver, like a lock of his long hair. But it wasn't Sesshoumaru's hair. It was something far more powerful. The thin string followed Hitachi's hand as the neko taiyoukai slowly made it spiral around his left arm.

Kouga now raised his hand and an azure string followed his hand from inside of Kagome. He wrapped it around her right arm.

"These parts of thy souls shall now be bound together! May thou never break this union."

The strings of their souls started to move down their arms, spiralling down.

The crowd gaped in awe how the strings of their souls danced lower to meet themselves. Above their united hands the two different souls met, azure mingling with silver. Its glow brightened and brightened. And then the strings were gone.

Kouga and Hitachi bowed again, and then returned to their places in the circle.

"Hisakata Sesshoumaru, Lord of the West," Abi spoke out. "Thy soul is now bound to thy mate."

"This I have done willingly."

"Higurashi Kagome, Lady of the West. Thy soul is now bound to thy mate."  
"This I have done willingly."

"By these words of mine - "

She nearly gasped at the sudden sharp pain.

" - shall you two be from now on - "

His grip of her hand tightened.

" - bound to each other by this link - "

It felt as if a stream of ice-cold water would have been trailing down her back.

" - of your hearts, of your souls - "

As his grip tightened yet again the pain in her head increased.

" - forever."

* * *

Such a sound as a large crystal bowl would have been shattered into millions and yet millions of pieces echoed all the way through her mind.

For a moment she stood rooted to her spot, thoroughly stunned. Sesshoumaru turned to her, the ceremony would end be sealing their bond with a kiss.

Kagome looked at him, wide-eyed. Then her knees gave in and fell down onto the ground, crying.

The power was overwhelming. It wrapped itself around her, it seemed like a dam would have been destroyed and now the powerful stream was free to run again. The endless, overwhelming stream of memories. They filled her mind, waves of thousands and yet thousand of memories hitting her so that she lost her breath, images after images flashing before her eyes, and it caused pain, her heart ached...

She now remembered. Remembered it all.

Miroku's lecherous grin and groping hands, his stance when he was ready to fight, clenching his staff, pulling out the rosary and using kazaana, his worried eyes over Sango's unmoving form, frown on his face when was trying to solve a problem.

Sango slapping Miroku's cheek, sitting on the floor Kirara in her lap, throwing the huge boomerang at the enemies, killing a random youkai. Her soft voice and worried eyes when she asked if she was all right, she was standing, eyes filled by unshed tears, screaming out her brother's name.

Shippo arguing with Inuyasha, he snuggling closer to her body, his wide fox-like grin, he playing with Kirara, shouting out "Kagome!", his voice filled with fear for loosing something precious.

Inuyasha sitting, sulking expression on his face, waving tetsusaiga, growling, in his human form, his head resting in her lap, he pinned against a tree by Kikyo's arrow.

The ghost of "Keh!" floated in her ear.

Her knees gave away, her vision blurred, hard sobs making her whole body tremble and she didn't seem to notice she had not fallen onto the hard ground. She doubled over, curling up, trying to set a wall between her and the mean world, she was still sobbing hard and her hands tightly clenched the cool fabric.

Gone. Permanently. All. Died. She. Alive. Alone. No way back. No denial. No escape from the fact.

_They all had died._

She had run away. Letting them die. She was the one to blame. She had done nothing to help them, nothing...

She had no purpose. She had no friends. There was no one to share this pain. Nobody who would know and understand the greatness of her loss. Nobody to comfort her.

Eventually her sobs died out. The world around her slowly came back alive again. She realised she was not lying on the ground. She let her grip of the cool fabric fall. She blinked, and raised her head, now suddenly surprised and confused in the middle of the depth of her sorrow.

He was watching her closely, a worried expression on his face.

"Dear, are you all right? What is it?"

First she noticed the amber eyes.

"I..nu.."

Then she noticed the markings on his face.

He was Sesshoumaru.

Where was she? What was happening? Why was Sesshoumaru holding her, calling her 'dear'...? Wait.. Sesshoumaru!

Kagome gasped, her eyes widened in fright.

"Do- Don't kill me! Stay away, Sesshoumaru!"

She wiggled out of his grasp, backing away from him, eyeing wildly the terrain around her. She needed to find an escape!

It was the shrine. It was her home. There was a circle on the ground and in the circle standing demon she did not recognise, save for Sesshoumaru and...

Her eyes widened as she rushed over to him.

Kagome buried her face into Kouga's shoulder as the violent sobs once again ran through her small body.

"Oh Kouga-kun!" She cried out, clinging to him like a drowning person to the hands of her saviour. "It's all my fault, all my fault..."

Sesshoumaru's growl reached their ears. Obviously the demon lord did not like his mate being so close to another demon male.

Kagome yelped, only clinging tighter on Kouga.

"Please, Kouga-kun! Don't let him kill me, please."

Kouga raised his gaze and looked straight into Sesshoumaru's glowing amber eyes.

The dog demon was next to them in an instant and pulled Kagome back to him, not minding her struggling.

The woman now sobbed against his chest, trying to break loose. But Sesshoumaru's arms held her tightly in the place.

Sesshoumaru gazed at the taiyoukais, a look in his eyes which could only be described as helpless.

The seal on her memories had been broken.


	25. Unwilling to stay unable to leave

**Chapter twenty four - Unwilling to stay, unable to leave**

The stream of her tears ended but her sorrow did not lessen. In a time of mere hours she had lost everything. Everyone. Naraku was the reason for her pain; it was he who had killed everyone dear to her. But yet she blamed only herself. She couldn't help thinking that maybe she could have done something with her purifying powers or with the completed Shikon no tama. But what had she done?

Nothing.

Like a coward she had fled, clutching the precious jewel in her hand. She had run all the way back to the village and back to Kaede's house. There she had finally completed her task, completed the Shikon jewel. Then she had heard it. That all others were dead. That none was left alive. Save for her. And she mourned for her loss. And then...

Nothing. Blank. No memories anymore.

And now... Now she was here in her own time, in the shrine yard, helplessly pounding on Sesshoumaru's chest with her small fists. She felt the auras of the strong demons right next to her. The courtyard was crowded with people. What was going on?

Despite her struggling, Sesshoumaru held her in his arms, steady against his chest. His grip of her was firm but yet gentle. He was clearly not going to kill her, she would already be dead by now had that been the case.

"Se- Sesshoumaru," she whispered hoarsely.

His grip tightened and he bent to place a kiss on the top of her head.

"I'm sorry, dearest. I'm so sorry."

His voice was as she remembered it, soft and deep, but the words had changed quite a deal. What had happened?

"Why are you here? What has happened?"

Sesshoumaru shared a glance with Hitachi and Kouga. Those were difficult questions and they would have to be very careful with their answers.

"Perhaps it is better that we go inside," Kouga suggested.

* * *

"I'm mated with Sesshoumaru?!"

All the six taiyoukais in the room winced at her loud shriek.

"That's... That's absurd! When did that happen?"

"About half an hour ago," Abi answered dryly.

"I know you're upset, dear Kagome, but just try to calm down a bit," Kouga said gently.

"Sorry, Sesshoumaru, the deal's off. I want a divorce."

"Sorry honey, that's not going to happen," Ayame sighed, her face saddened.

"In fact you can't part with Sesshoumaru for a few weeks," Hitachi said in his quiet manner. "Your soul was united with his. You must stick with him until you're both used to it. You're bound to each other. You shall be together forever."

Kagome's knees gave in.

A white blur flashed across the little room and soon the others saw Sesshoumaru holding Kagome protectively in his arms.

"You should take her home," Abi advised. "Let her get used to things. Let her mourn."

Sesshoumaru nodded and carried her out of the room. After the door had been closed Kayade let out a long sigh.

"I pity them. Kagome must feel awful, but truth to be told... I'm more concerned of Sesshoumaru. I've... never seen him like this. So out of control of his emotions."

"True," Kouga agreed. "I thought for a while that he'd start whining like a pup. He looked so miserable."

"It's not fair," Rin said, drawing in a shaky breath. Her voice was watery and trembling. Silent tears were slowly rolling down the woman's face. "Both of them have already suffered so much. I just want them both to be happy… And they were! But this... this..." her voice broke and her shoulders lumped before she fell meekly against Hitachi's chest.

Tears were also sliding over Kayade's cheeks as the young wolf princess raised her head letting out a long lonely howl of sorrow.

* * *

Kagome did not utter a word. During the car-ride she had been staring out of the window. When they were back at home, she sat on the couch, her eyes blank, loneliness loss and agony written all over her face. The sight was so sad it made his heart ache. When the little creamy cat padded into the room, she broke down crying again. Sesshoumaru knew that the cat had once belonged to the taijiya and he understood that seeing the little demon brought back many painful memories. Sesshoumaru scooped the woman into his arms and carried her into the bedroom. He laid the sobbing woman gently down on the bed and pulled the covers over her. Before exiting the room he stopped, watching her. Then he sighed and walked out to the living room where he laid himself down on to couch, pulling the fire-cat close to him. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, willing himself to sleep.

She slowly woke up. She didn't know the bed she had slept in, she couldn't recognise the room she was in... But the guy who was holding her tightly she did recognise.

"Sesshoumaru, let go," she cried out, struggling against his strong hold.

His golden eyes fluttered open. He blinked a few times and then let his grip of her fade. Kagome pulled away from him, covering herself with the sheet.

"I'm sorry," he said in a strangled voice. "I couldn't help it. The mating mark calls out to my demon blood."

"Mating mark?"

"Here," he whispered softly, brushing a small silver crescent moon on her right shoulder. "Just like this one here," he said, showing her the small azure tear drop shaped mark on his left shoulder.

"Why?"

"To note that our souls are bound to each other. My soul left that mark on you, your soul left this on me."

The vision blurred as the tears swelled up in her eyes. Ghastly the little gleaming pearls slid down her cheeks, falling down to the bed sheet.

Here she was, alone in her own time, in Sesshoumaru's bed, feeling like a prisoner. Her life was permanently and eternally united with Sesshoumaru. The death of all of her friends was a cold fact that weighed heavily in her heart, pulling her whole being down into the deep waters of melancholy. Why had this all happened? How had it all wound up like this?

* * *

Her sorrow was as deep as the sea, so dark and deep that she couldn't even see its surface. She knew there had to be a surface for it somewhere up there and subconsciously she also realised that she would have to pull herself out of these depths of her misery, all the way to the surface. She really didn't know what would be out there, on the other side. That's why she did not want to pull herself out of here. At least she knew what was down here. Here was safe. And she did not want to let go.

Being close to him didn't really help. Although she saw he had changed, she still could not trust him. And every time she saw that silver hair and those amber eyes she couldn't help but think what would Inuyasha do if he ever found out... And then she would remember that Inuyasha would do nothing since he had died five hundred years ago. After remembering that she would either start crying again, or then just dwell in her sorrow.

She couldn't stop thinking about him, not for a one moment. Her broken heart cried in its misery. She had loved him – she still loved him. All the moments spent with him, every memory no matter good or bad drowned her yet deeper into the endless sea of melancholy. He was no more. But she was. And she was now married with his older half brother.

If she had not been so tightly wrapped up in her own sadness, she would have been shocked to see Sesshoumaru's reaction to this all. The formerly cold, stoic and merciless demon lord she remembered was replaced with this saddened, suffering one. He treated her with gentleness and love. But she did not notice. She was so in deep in her own misery that she failed to see how miserable he was. Her melancholy was affecting him. His helplessness made him feel sad and frustrated and the fact that he wanted badly to help her, but could not, didn't exactly make him feel any better. In the mating ceremony two lives were forever united, two souls entwining and becoming one. But what to do when the other one of these souls was divided in two, the other part denying the bond?

It pained him to see Kagome's tears, to see her pull away from him and know that the fragile trust that had been there not too long ago was now gone – possibly for good. He knew she would have to move on, to let go of the painful memories, not to let her terrible loss keep her so tightly wrapped up in utter melancholy. She had seemingly lost her recent memories; they were smothered under the overwhelming misery of her miko-side. The Kagome who had trusted, loved him and willingly had agreed to be his mate was still there somewhere underneath. Unless she would let go of her sorrow, that side of her couldn't get out. But would she ever be able to move on? She was strong, he knew, but all she had experienced, all that sadness and all the losses, everything she had gone through was just simply too much for a human to take. Maybe even too much for a demon to take.

Sighing he got up from the bed, leaving her to sit on the bed alone as he walked into the kitchen to prepare their usual morning tea.

Kagome didn't want to have anything to do with Sesshoumaru, to be honest. She maybe could have borne the pain had she been alone... But with him constantly reminding her of the Sendoku Jidai... of Inuyasha...

* * *

Unfortunately she very soon personally found out that she had no choice but to stick with him. An important meeting occurred with a very busy client and Sesshoumaru had to go to his office. With an apology and a longing look he left, leaving her alone for the first time in whole five days.

However, the moment he was gone an odd restlessness started to cause a tumult in her soul. It signalled that something important was missing. A tugging, pulsing feeling was pulling her mind, telling her to go after him so that they could be together again so that she could be whole again. Clenching her teeth Kagome pushed the feeling roughly aside. For awhile she felt at peace.

But then the feeling returned, now stronger than before. She could not help herself. She had to get to him. Panic flooded into her mind but it dissolved at a sudden stab of pain. The mating mark on her right shoulder was burning. It felt as is without him she was choking. The burning pain made thinking hard as she gasped for air. Odd weakness flushed all over her. She knew she had to get to him no matter what...

'This is just great,' Kagome muttered sarcastically in her thoughts, 'I'm getting withdrawals for not being with Sesshoumaru.'

She grabbed her coat and the business card he had left in the case something would happen and she'd need the address to his office. The way was short and she soon saw the tall slender building of the Soraji corp.

She opened the glass doors and stepped in.

"Excuse me," she asked the young man sitting behind the high counter, "where can I find Sesshoumaru?"

The man looked at her oddly. Who did this crazy woman think she was, speaking of the great manager with such a careless familiarity?

"Hisakata-sama would probably be in his office, ma'am," he answered importantly, turning back to his computer screen.

Kagome clenched her teeth not to hiss aloud as the mating mark scorched her skin.

"And where would his office be," she spat out.

He nearly gasped aloud of such rudeness.

"Hisakata-sama won't be seeing anyone."

"Just tell me where the fucking office is," Kagome hissed. Her patience was very quickly draining down as the throbbing pain increased. She just had no time to deal with pompous asses.

The young man behind the counter gawked at her. Then he clamped his mouth close, lips forming one straight thin line.

"I'm afraid I will have to ask you to leave, ma'am," he said strictly.

Her heated glare made him gulp audibly.

"Sesshoumaru's. Office. Where?"

"Ma'am, if you refuse to leave I will have to call the security," he stated after bracing up all the remains of his courage.

"Jacob!" A short dark-haired man wearing glasses was walking towards the counter. He was carrying a briefcase and was clad in a neat black suit.

"Yes sir?"

"Is there a problem?" he inquired, watching the young man.

"Well yes sir, this rude woman here insist on wanting to see Hisakata-sama and – "

The man in suit turned his gaze to fuming Kagome. For awhile he studied the woman, then his eyes widened in recognition.

"Higurashi-san?"

Kagome frowned. How come this guy knew her name?

"So it is you," he stated cheerily. The young man behind the counter had dropped his jaw – again. "I suppose you don't remember me, I'm Takane Seyo, the vice-president of Soraji corp."

"Pleasure," Kagome said, inclining her head. "Might you want to tell me where Sesshoumaru's office is?"

"Why certainly! Allow me to escort you. This way."

They walked into the direction of the elevators, leaving behind a very stunned, young receptionist.

"Hello, Rin-san!"

"Takane-san," the secretary chirped, smiling brightly. Her smile turned into a surprised expression as she noticed the slender woman standing next to him.

"Kagome!" She got up from her chair and walked up to the miko. "How are you feeling?"

"I need to get to Sesshoumaru," Kagome managed to speak out. Her breathing was heavy and laboured. "Now."

Rin glanced at her just once and understood what was wrong right away. She was mated with a demon herself, she knew that the first few weeks were difficult to endure. Parting with your mate caused physical pain.

"Thank you, Takane-san, for bringing her here," Rin paused to flash the vice-president a quick smile.

"My pleasure," he exclaimed.

"Come," Rin said to Kagome, gently aiding her steps, walking them both to his door. Without knocking she opened it. She stood in the door way, urging Kagome to step in. As Sesshoumaru spotted her he was swiftly in front of her. A sad smile rose to Rin's lips as she watched the pair for awhile, before turning around and walking away from the scene pulling the door behind her closed.

'Might as well have lunch now,' she thought to herself. As she entered the lobby she noticed that the receptionist seemed a bit paler than usual.

"Hi Jacob-kun. Are you all right?"

"Hello, Rin-san. I'm fine. Uhm... Would you happen to know...? Hum... There was this young woman before, Takane-sama escorted her to see Hisakata-sama and..."

"Oh, you're talking about Kagome-chan," Rin replied, smiling. "She's Hisakata-sama's wife." Smiling for one more time Rin walked out of the building, heading to a café nearby.

* * *

Sesshoumaru raised his head from the paperwork as he heard the creak of the door. Spotting Kagome he vanished and in a flash was standing before her, pulling her into his tight embrace. He buried his nose into her raven hair, inhaling her scent. Being away from her had pained him more than he had been prepared for and he was ready to be roasted by her purifying powers, just to hold her in his arms. Distantly he registered Rin closing the door again after leaving the room, giving him privacy with his mate.

Kagome closed her eyes, snuggling her against his warmth. The pain ceased the moment he touched her, the burning pain replaced with calm contentment. For a very short while she forgot about everything and felt happy and safe in his arms.

Then she remembered it was Sesshoumaru embracing her, not Inuyasha.

She pulled away, spotting briefly the disappointment flashing in his golden eyes.

"Does that happen every time we part," Kagome asked hoarsely, her gaze everywhere but not on him.

"For some time, yes. As our souls get used to the binding, we can part for longer whiles."

"But never for good," she spoke out the words Sesshoumaru had not.

"Yes," he nodded gravely.

"Do you still have work to do?"

The demon lord gazed at his desk.

"No. Let's go home."

Kagome nodded, turning around and starting to walk towards the door.

"Oh, by the way your receptionist is as thick as a brick. Do something about him."

"That American lad, was he?"

"Sounded like one."

"As you wish, dear."

* * *

She was sitting on the couch, looking blankly at the wall before her.

He walked across the room and sat down next to her. For awhile he watched her form, registering the distant look in her eyes and the small tear that was rolling down her cheek, probably without her noticing it at all.

Feelings. How could the humans cope with them? They confused him deeply, after meeting her again after 500 years his feelings had started to rise to the surface, slipping from under his control... And he always was in control of himself.

Until now, at least. The little fragile miko had won over his heart, awaking feelings in him that no one before her had. He had learned to honour this woman and was proud that she was now his mate. Or he would be proud if only she were able to wake from her numb state. When the mating mark had started to burn, when she had come to him, Sesshoumaru saw that the pain had for a short while shaken her out of her melancholy. For that short while she was herself again. But then, the pain had vanished and she reduced back to that empty Kagome-shell.

After seeing her real self, if even for a blink of an eye, after holding her in his arms, after the short second during which everything had been all right and both of them had felt at ease with each other...

After all that it pained him even more to see Kagome like this. He wanted to touch her but did not dare; his heart broke every time she flinched away from him. She was right next to him but yet she could as well be back in the Sengoku Jidai, five hundred years out of his reach. She lingered in the past, not allowing herself to move on. He would have given anything he possessed, everything he possessed just to be able to help her let go. To make her see it all wasn't over. There was a chance to happiness. With him. But he needed her to allow him to help her, to show her, to love her. And at this state... He hated himself for being too weak to help her. He had not even offered his help to her.

He was scared.

If he offered his help... would she allow him to help her?

He was scared for he knew that if she would reject his help... If she would reject him...

Sesshoumaru was ready to give his life for this woman. He was ready to give up everything for his love for her because it was so great. If she would refuse his help... If she would refuse his love...

With a single word the miko was able to crush the strong taiyoukai completely. So great was the power she held over his heart and soul.

And she did not even know it.

Sesshoumaru let out a small sigh and extended his long finger, brushing away her tear drop. She flinched at his touch, pulling away from him. She blinked, the distant look in her eyes slowly fading away.

The pain in his chest was physical when he once again witnessed her to flinch and pull away under his touch.

It was then when he made his decision. This kind of state they were in now was draining them both. Slowly the pain and misery were bringing them closer and closer to the edge. Sooner or later, the sorrow would crush them both.

Wouldn't it be a better fate to be crushed swiftly and efficiently instead of a slow torture?

"Do you wish to talk about it," Sesshoumaru asked softly, his voice calm, covering his nervousness completely. The offer was out now. Was she going to accept it or reject it?

Kagome blinked. To talk about it?

"_You can tell me if you wish to, Kagome-chan. Talking eases the pain and sadness. It's always better to tell someone than to keep it all bottled up inside."_

Yes... She remembered that Sango had spoken those words long ago. Maybe she should not suffer it all alone in her silence. Maybe she should tell someone how she felt... She had mourned for one week now, for seven days had she done nothing but sitting and thinking, barely eating anything. Coming to think of it, she would have starved unless Sesshoumaru had urged her to eat. Talking about things would surely help. It had always helped with Sango. But Sango wasn't there to listen anymore. Instead it was Sesshoumaru this time, sitting by her side. Could she confess the deepest feelings of her heart to her previous enemy?

She heard his voice in her head. The image to go with the memory of the voice she could not find.

"_I shall protect my mate. My own life I am willing to sacrifice, for her to gain a chance to live... I love this woman from all of my heart."_

Sesshoumaru had been her enemy. In her memories he had tried to kill her. But what had happened between them after she had returned to her own time, having her miko blood sealed? What had changed the taiyoukai so?

He was no longer her enemy. Now he was her ally. In fact he was more than that.

Whether she liked it or not, she couldn't just be wrapped up in her own misery anymore. She was bound to Sesshoumaru and there was nothing she could do about it. It could not be undone. Kagome had two choices. She could both deny it, and let her sorrow swallow her up. Or she could acknowledge the situation and get used to it.

"I... I don't know where to start," she admitted hesitantly.

"How about from the beginning," he suggested. Gently Sesshoumaru laid his hand on her shoulder.

This time she did not flinch.

* * *

It was slow, but nevertheless a progress. She still didn't trust him, she still didn't love him and from time to time the waves of melancholy overwhelmed her, pulling her back into those depths. This moment was one of those. She stood idly in front of the window. Tears streamed down her face. It looked like she would be watching the city in front of her but he knew her eyes saw nothing. Nothing but long gone moments now only existing in her memories. He stepped into the room, leaving his watching post in the doorway. Immediately azure flames flared over her form.

"What do you want, demon," she bit out in a nonchalant voice. She turned her head a bit so he could see her side profile. Her eyes were flashing. Her blue eyes.

"It's been awhile since you last time showed up," he said warily.

A wry smile curled the corners of her lips.

"I decided to come out and greet you, darling," she said mockingly. "After all, we're mated, are we not?"

"How is she doing?"

"It's more confusing than before," the miko replied blankly. "At the moment it is as if Kagome's soul were divided in three."

"Three?" Sesshoumaru raised his eyebrow.

"One part of her is the one who loves you. One part is where her two sides have begun to unite. And then, there's me."

"What is happening," Sesshoumaru asked sharply.

"She's becoming one. But the process is slow. The woman who loves you and I will be together again, but it will take some time until the union shall be complete. Nowadays you can see the beginning of the union. She's in control. The woman who trusts you but does not trust you. The woman who forgot and yet can remember. The Kagome who never was a miko or a timetraveller and... me." She smirked.

"Does it bother you so much?"

"What," the miko asked.

"The mating."

"I hate demons," she retorted, narrowing her eyes.

"But you loved Inuyasha," he whispered quietly.

She flinched at that remark, glancing at him sharply. The expression she saw in his eyes made her let out a small involuntary gasp.

He bore the same pain as her.

"You really love her, don't you?"

"No," Sesshoumaru answered gravely as he took a step towards her.

Her icy sapphire eyes narrowed into slits, but she did not make a move away.

"I love all of you", he said hoarsely, closing in their distance.

Kagome's eyes widened at hearing that. She went so numb that she did not even struggle as he pulled her into his arms. The miko powers pitched but then settled down, azure flames vanishing. The miko closed her eyes.

"Thank you, Sesshoumaru... For setting me free."

She remained silent for awhile, and then her eyes fluttered open.

Their warm hazel depths locked with his golden gaze.

"Sesshoumaru," she breathed out softly, before wrapping her arms around his form. "I love you."

The taiyoukai squeezed her tighter against him.

They stood like that for awhile, until he noted that the hazel colour started to fade. Soon he was gazing down into a pair of eyes familiar to him since the day the seal broke. This was the one Kagome would become. This was the right one, the woman who trusted him and did not trust him. The woman who forgot and yet could remember. The woman who was a miko and was not. He looked into that peculiar pair of eyes, one was hazel, and the other was sapphire blue. Reluctantly he let go of her, knowing that she was not yet used to his touch. She did not yet seek his embrace.

May he be damned, but what he had said, was the truth. Sesshoumaru truly loved Kagome. All of her.


	26. Ode to my family

**Chie:** I got this far. My very first fanfic. –sniffle, sniffle- It's the end, people.

**Chapter twenty five – Ode to my family**

_Six years later_

Everyone was there, as they should be. Familiar faces all over. Kirara was there also, the only remaining member of the Inutachi besides the Lady of the West. On Kirara's head was Myoga, dressed in fine clothes for the festivities. Doctor Usugi Kira, the otter demoness was standing in the crowd. A bit to her left was standing Yameko Kagura with her mate Hojo. There was also, much to everyone's surprise Tadachi Shizuki, mated with a kind human male named Akio. Kagome's family was there, naturally, her mother, grandfather and brother Souta, together with Aunt Shaere. Takane-san was there also, the busy vice-president had managed to take some time off from his work, just to be there.

And then there was the Shirakawa-family in all of its glory, the royal family of the North. Kouga, Ayame and Kayade, her younger brother Hiroshi and the twin boys along with the youngest one, the shy little girl Keiko, whose hands were tightly grasping the silk fabric of her mother's kimono. She was a year older than the prince of the West, but a quiet and shy girl. There were rumours moving around that the Northern Lady would be pregnant again. Well, as Sesshoumaru had told his mate, getting many children was the way of the wolves.

The Lady of the Eastern lands still stood alone in her green kimono. They would have to start to look for a mate for her sooner or later.

The little family of the Southern lands was there also. Hitachi's and Rin's eldest son Kiyoshi, who was five years older than Kayade, had finally returned back to Japan from China. Rin was carrying in her arms the younger son, born only three months ago.

Kagome stood beside her mate, who was glancing around the crowd, preparing mentally for his speech. Small light talons brushed against the skin of her palm. Kagome turned her head to the side and smiled down at the barely four year old prince of the Western lands, who was the reason they all had gathered here. The demon pup was an image of his father. Kagome was rather proud of herself that she had been able to produce a full-blooded demon heir for the throne of the West, although, the Shikon no Tama was in fact the reason for it.

Sesshoumaru cleared his throat and the quiet chatter of the crowd immediately ceased.

"First, I have to thank you all for being here. Friends and family, everyone alike. The road to here was long, and I believe we all have changed quite a lot on our way. But here we all are now, and I have to say that at least I am very content and happy this way, two feelings I once thought that I'd never feel. There once was the taiyoukai of the Western lands and there once was a miko who travelled in time. They met several times in the past, drifting from hardship to another just to survive and to meet one another five hundred years later. They weren't quite fond of each other in the beginning but slowly, little by little, they started to get to know one another better and the feelings deepened and warmed up. There were dramatic turning points like their accidental mating and the pregnancy following that event, ending up in a miscarriage. But the dramatics served to show just how deep their love was and together they survived. They got mated only to get some new hardships... But together they survived. Time healed everything. Three became one."

**

* * *

Flashback**

"_I'm starting to fade more and more," the blue eyed miko-Kagome said quietly as she lay in his arms. "The pull is stronger and the healing is faster now. Very soon there'll only be one left."_

_Sesshoumaru held her protectively, tangling his hand in her raven hair._

_Kagome would get crying-fits and depression would occur every now and then, but it was much more seldom than earlier. And all of her sides had accepted Sesshoumaru as her mate._

"_I came to say goodbye to you, Sesshoumaru," the miko said, smiling slightly. "This might be the last time I have enough strength to push the other two aside."_

"_So you will be leaving me then," Sesshoumaru said, a bit disappointed. The miko-side of Kagome was more serious and mature. He had really enjoyed their long conversations._

_The woman let out a melodious little laugh._

"_Now, Sesshoumaru. I won't be leaving you for good. I'm fading because I'm fusing with my non-priestess side into the Kagome we both used to be. The girl from modern day Tokyo_ _and the girl who fell into Sengoku Jidai shall be now one. Finally. It's not a thing you should be sad of. You should be happy. We will be one and whole again. Soon.. We are healed. I will still be there."_

"_But it's not the same thing," Sesshoumaru said quietly._

"_No, it's not," the miko admitted. "But it's even better that way."_

_Few days later when Sesshoumaru woke up, his mate were already up, watching him with her blue eyes._

"_Good morning," she greeted him softly._

_He rose into a half-sitting position, cupping Kagome's cheek with his large hand, examining her closely._

"_What?" she inquired._

"_You seem different this morning," Sesshoumaru answered, still trying to find out what exactly was off._

"_Well I feel better than I've felt for a looooong time," she smiled._

_And then he finally registered her eyes. They were blue, not as sapphire blue as her miko side had had, and not completely blue either, there were hazel touches in there. No more mismatched pair of eyes._

_The healing had stopped for there was nothing to heal anymore. She was one again._

_He pulled her into his embrace, burying his face into her hair._

"_I love you, Kagome."_

"_Yes darling, I know," she laughed merrily. "And I love you too."_

**flashback ends**

* * *

"And after that I was happier than I ever thought that even was possible. I want to thank you all for it meant a lot to both of us to know that you were there, supporting us when it was difficult," Sesshoumaru continued with his speech.

"Mommy," a soft voice called as the small hand tugged her bigger one.

"Yes, sweetie?" Kagome asked glancing at her son.

"Why daddy speaks so much? How long it will take? I'm hungry."

"Sweetheart, you're the prince of the Western lands. Little princes do not complain, they behave. And they certainly do not openly show their boredom," Kagome scolded lightly.

"But I am bored and tired and hungry and – "

"Dear, look at the northern princes. Do they look bored?"

"No, but I'm sure they are anyway."

"That's probably true but the thing is that they don't let it show. Now, you can't be worse than the princes of the North?"

"But – "

"One more word and I'll tell your father how pitifully you complained in the middle of the ceremony and his speech."

The young demon prince straightened his back and fell silent, every slight hints of boredom vanishing from his face.

Kagome inwardly laughed. That threat always worked.

"And then I found out that my mate was pregnant," Sesshoumaru told.

**

* * *

Flashback**

_She had doubted it for some while already. After all, she had experienced this before and the symptoms were the same. Now she only needed to be sure. _

_Concealing this all from Sesshoumaru was very difficult. She cursed his high demon senses for tenth thousand time. Luckily she had her miko-powers. Without them she'd have no chance hiding the secret from her mate._

_She was almost sure, but needed to be absolutely positive. _

"_You're spacing out again, Kagome-chan," Kayade pointed out with a small smile. "What's bothering you? I hope all's well with you and 'Uncle Sess'.."_

_Kagome smiled briefly at the nickname. It was not Kayade's doing but the twins' idea. The youngest sons of Ayame and Kouga were very lively and Kagome couldn't see how on Earth Ayame could survive with them._

"_No, it's not that. Everything's great with Sesshoumaru and me.. It's just... Uhh. Promise to tell no one?"_

"_I will not tell a soul."_

"_I think I might be pregnant."_

"_OH! That's wonderful! Congratulations! How did Sesshoumaru take the news?"_

"_I'm keeping it a secret from him."_

"_You are? Trying to keep a secret like that from a taiyoukai is nearly impossible."_

"_Tell me about it."_

"_Then why?"_

"_I figured it would be worth the surprise."_

"_Ohh, Kagome-chan... You're evil!"_

"_Thanks," the miko laughed, going back to work._

"_Hello, doctor. Do you have some time today? ... Well, I just got from work, so ... Yeah ... Oh, that's great! I'll take the subway then ... Good. Okay, bye!"_

_She tucked the cell phone back into her pocket and resumed her walk._

"_Well, well, well! The Lady of the Western lands! Welcome!"_

"_Oh, stop the formalities, Kira-san, please."_

_The otter demoness smiled warmly. _

"_As you wish, Kagome-san. Now, what brings you here?"_

"_I think I might be pregnant."_

"_Is that so? Well then, let's find that one out, shall we? This way.."_

_After a quick check-up the truth was found out._

"_Well, your assumption was correct. Congratulations, Kagome-san! You may borrow my phone if you want to tell to the Lord..."_

"_No need to, thanks. I'll tell him later, after all, I've kept it a secret from him ever since the thought first occurred me."_

"_As you wish."_

"_Thank you, Kira-san. For everything."_

"_You're welcome dear. I'm glad that our lord will finally have an heir."_

"_I hope he will appreciate it."_

"_Surely he will! But unfortunately I'm needed elsewhere now, Kagome-san."_

"_No matter, I should get home now anyway."_

"_We'll see soon. Come back in three or four weeks. I'll check then better how things have started, okay?"_

"_Sure. Bye for now, Kira-san."_

"_Bye," the doctor replied, watching the leaving woman with affection._

"_What is this? You hardly ever take seconds, Kagome."_

"_Well your cooking tastes divine, darling."_

"_Be careful though, if you make a habit of this, you'll gain weight," Sesshoumaru teased._

"_Oh well, I'll be gaining weight soon anyway, so I better start early," Kagome replied lightly._

_Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow in question._

"_Besides, all the food is not going to me anyway. I have to feed the little one too."_

"_The little one?" Sesshoumaru blinked. At least three different emotions flashed on his face._

"_What? It was one of the promises in the mating ceremony too, right? I'm supposed to give you an heir."_

"_You ... You're ... Our ..."_

"_Your mouth's agape, darling, you'll attract flies."_

**flashback ends**

* * *

'Yeah. All the trouble I went through trying my best to hide it really paid off at that reaction of his,' Kagome laughed in her mind. After Sesshoumaru had got past the first surprise he had been adorable. The dinner there ended as he had dragged her out of the whole apartment, to finish their meal in one very fancy restaurant.

They had told the others the next week, to her family, to Rin and Hitachi, to Abi, to Kouga and Ayame. Everyone took the news with enthusiastic squeals and everyone was so happy for them that it nearly made her heart ache for being just so content.. So happy. Everything was perfect. Though there were times of sadness as well.. Times when her past still had haunted her... Now she had got over it. All thanks to Sesshoumaru.

**

* * *

guess what?**

"_I think it is time to give this back to you. Hang it on your wall, give it to whom it truly belongs." Rin was smiling as warmly as always, handing him the painting. Sesshoumaru took it, examining the lines his brush had made so long time ago._

_With a nod he accepted the gift from her._

"_Good. I'll get going now."_

"_Kagome hoped you would have time to come over for a dinner the day after tomorrow," Sesshoumaru said, remembering how his mate had proposed inviting them over while they were eating breakfast._

"_We'd love to," Rin promised. "Bye, Sesshoumaru." She had finally dropped the formalities after Kagome had told Sesshoumaru to tell Rin to stop._

"_Bye, Rin. See you tomorrow." He watched her go and then closed the door. He turned and walked into the living room. Few moments later the painting was hanging on the white wall. He watched his handiwork and nodded. Good. Then he walked over to the bookshelf, running his finger on the backs of the books until he found the one he had been looking for. A blue covered notebook. He set it onto the table and went to kitchen._

_About fifteen minutes later Kagome got home. She had been out with her old friends, Eri, Yuka and Ayumi. She took off her shoes and her coat, and then heading to living room.  
"Sesshoumaru? I'm home! The movie was good and – "her voice died out. There was a painting hanging on the wall see had never seen before. Her hand rose instinctively to cover her mouth as her vision momentarily blurred, one single involuntary tear sliding down the side of her face. Like in a trance she walked up to it, tracing the figures with her finger. Sango and Miroku... Shippo... Inuyasha..._

_It still hurt her deep. Reluctantly she tore her eyes from the painting. It pained too much to see them all like that, this abruptly.. Her gaze landed onto the little notebook on the table. Her diary. She took it into her hands and fell onto the couch as her weak legs failed her. _

"_They belong to you, it was time to give them back to you," Sesshoumaru spoke out. Kagome turned her head and saw him standing leaning against the door frame, holding two tea cups in his hands. He had probably been watching her the whole time._

"_Them..." she whispered hoarsely. "You mean that the painting is mine as well?"_

"_I made that painting," Sesshoumaru said softly. "And it's you who inspired me into doing it. Hence it belongs to you."_

_Kagome's lip trembled slightly as Sesshoumaru walked to her. He placed the cups onto the table and then sat sown next to her. She wrapped her arms around him, crying weakly against his shoulder._

_He returned her embrace._

"_Even if you forgot, I still remembered. Everything."_

_From those words softly whispered into her ear she finally found peace and__ comfort from the painful memories._

**flashback ends

* * *

  
**

"We grew anxious as the months passed until we finally were blessed with a healthy, full-blooded demon child," Sesshoumaru told in his speech.

Kagome stole a glance at her son from the corner of her eye. Oh how she still remembered the moment...

**

* * *

SURPRISE!**

"_You may come in now, my lord," Kira called from the door way._

_Sesshoumaru stopped his pacing around._

"_Is she all right?"_

"_Yes. And so is your son."_

"_Son?"_

_In a flash Sesshoumaru was standing next to the bed where exhausted but utterly happy Kagome was lying, holding their child._

_Kira smiled, pulling the door shut, leaving the little family into their own peace. Kagome had agreed with her not to let Sesshoumaru into the labour, seeing how he had panicked the last time..._

_The baby was contently dozing in his mother's arms. A small fluff of silver hair gleamed on the top of his head. His face bore the same markings as his father, save for that he had only one stripe per cheek and that they were lavender instead of Sesshoumaru's magenta twin-stripes. He had perfect little hands with all five fingers, each of which ending with a sharp tiny claw._

"_How are you," he asked softly, moving his gaze to the mother now._

_Kagome smiled._

"_Tired, very tired but more than pleased."_

_Sesshoumaru sat down onto the edge of the bed._

"_He's full-blooded," Sesshoumaru pointed out._

"_Yes he is," Kagome replied proudly._

"_You did a very good job, my love," Sesshoumaru congratulated, gently tracing the side of her face with his hand._

"_Here," Kagome said smiling, "hold your son."_

_Sesshoumaru hesitantly closed his large hands around the little form. He was a bit afraid that he might break the baby for it was so small and fragile._

"_You're doing just fine," Kagome assured. "Now play dad for awhile, I'm taking a little nap."_

_Sesshoumaru's hold of his son grew more secure after a while and he bent to place a kiss on his mate's forehead. Then he leaned back, taking a good position on the edge of the bed, watching both his son and his mate sleep safely. He would protect them both._

**flashback died

* * *

  
**

"And now, nearly four years later we've come to see this day, to be present in this ancient ceremony," Sesshoumaru finished his speech.

Kagome took their child into her arms and took a step forward.

"Behold, this is Yoshiro, son of Sesshoumaru," Kagome spoke as she held out the pup in her arms to the crowd to see. She turned to face her mate.

"Behold, my lord, here is thy son to whom I have given birth."

Sesshoumaru took the child from her.

"Here is my son Yoshiro. I have accepted him and now announced that he is my true son. After me, he will rise and rule over all the Western lands for in his veins runs my blood and the blood of my clan which has ruled over West since the beginning of times."

"Hail Yoshiro, the future lord," the gathered people cheered.

Sesshoumaru set the pup down and wrapped his arm loosely around Kagome's shoulders, placing a soft kiss onto her cheek.

"Now the ceremony's over but I'd like to have your attention for one more second, for there is yet one announcement to make."

Soft murmur of voices erupted in the crowd of people.

"It has come to our knowledge that the West shall be blessed with another child. My lady Kagome is pregnant yet again."

The crowd broke into cheers and squeals and people started to swarm in closer and closer, to congratulate the pair.

Young prince Yoshiro sneaked away from his parents when nobody was looking, to play with the wolf-twins.

"Now this is what I've been waiting for Kami knows how many years," Mrs Higurashi said when she had finally made her way towards the Western lord and lady. "Keep the grandchildren coming, you two."

Kagome gave a merry little laugh and hugged her mom tight.

"I'm SO happy," Rin declared, hugging Sesshoumaru loosely with one arm for the other one was holding the little Kenta. Hitachi patted the father on the shoulder.

"Congratulations, cousin."

"You still have a long way to go, Sesshoumaru and Kagome," a gruff voice sneered.

"Ah, the wolves who mistake themselves into rabbits," Sesshoumaru teased dryly.

Kouga's grin widened and he stepped up to Sesshoumaru, patting his shoulder with much more force than Hitachi had. Ayame went to hug Kagome who had been chatting with Rin. Kayade came to congratulate with Kiyoshi, Hitachi's son.

"Well done, Uncle Sess. Soon you've got as much as my parents."

"Kami save me from that," Sesshoumaru chuckled.

"Well, there's no chance you'd be able to keep your hands off from your mate," Kiyoshi said, his face grave. "Besides, demons are outnumbered by humans. You should do your best to populate. Otherwise the demon race shall be vanished after years of inbred and humiliation."

"Kiyoshi, we missed you," Kayade breathed out, giggling. She loved the boy, as if they were cousins. They had always played together when they were little.

"Kagome-chan, congratulations," Kayade said as she hugged her friend.

"Congratulations," Kiyoshi nodded.

Kagome smiled at the wolf princess and the hanyou.

"Thank you."

"That's amazing news, Sesshou-kun. I'm happy for you," a soft voice spoke as its owner hugged Sesshoumaru briefly.

"Thank you Shizuki."

"Kagome-sama, take care of everything," the dog-demoness wished, bowing her head.

"Sesshy, you old dog, that's awesome!"

"Cease your squealing, if you please, Kagura."

"Well done, Kagome," the wind-demoness grinned.

"Congratulations," Hojo said, hugging loosely Kagome.

"Thank you."

Kagome turned her head and met Sesshoumaru's golden eyes on her form. He smiled briefly and she sighed. It was a happy, content little sigh.

_

* * *

Yet two years later _

She pulled the blanket over the two forms. The twins were so inseparable that they could sleep unless they shared a bed. Who was she to separate them? They were so cute together. Two pairs of black soft doggy-ears twitched in sleep.

"Good night, my dears," the woman whispered gently and walked into the next room.

"Mommy, tell me a bed-time story."

"It's so late already, Yoshiro," the woman pointed out. "You have to get to sleep right away."

"But I want to hear more about Uncle Inuyasha and your adventures when you were young," the boy pouted.

Kagome laughed softly.

"Tomorrow's a long day, my dear."

"I know, I know... Abi-san's and Susumu-san's mating ceremony."

"Right. So now you should be off to sleep."

"Will you tell me a story tomorrow?"

"I'll tell you two," Kagome promised with a small smile.

"I still don't believe that daddy tried to kill you."

"Well, that was then. A lot happened after that."  
"So he's not trying to kill you anymore?"

"Of course not."

"It seemed like that last night."

"What do you mean," Kagome asked, raising her eyebrow.

"He was biting your neck. I woke up last night and went to kitchen to have a cup of water and – "

"Oh," Kagome blurted out, blushing slightly. "_That._ Well... Ask your dad about it."

"I already asked. He told me to ask you."

'Sesshoumaru, you coward,' Kagome accused in her thoughts.

"Well, Yoshiro, ask again when you're a bit older."

"Mom – " he started.

"Now off to bed you go, young man."

He pouted, but Kagome didn't mind. She bent down to place a kiss on his cheek.

Then she turned around and walked out of the room, switching off the lights.

"Hikari and Mizuki are fast asleep. Yoshiro was a bit of problem though," Kagome told as she was undressing herself.

"You could handle him just well, darling."

"Kami know how many times," Kagome answered with a sigh. She walked over to the bed and snaked under the covers, snuggling as close to him as possible. He let out a purring sound.

"He saw us last night."

"I know."

"You didn't explain," she said in a blaming tone.

"Nor did you," he pointed out.

Damn demons and their hearing abilities. She forgot her small peak of anger as Sesshoumaru wrapped his arm around her and nuzzled the side of her neck.

"You're tired as well, my love. Sleep."

"I will," she replied, yawning. Kagome closed her eyes.

Sesshoumaru stayed awake until her breath had evened and she was sleeping soundly. Then he watched his sleeping mate, affection and love written all over his form. With his demonic hearing he could also hear the low snuffling sound from Yoshiro's room and the soft breathing of his twin daughters. The taiyoukai of the West felt content – and was purring like a cat. Slowly, pale lids fell to cover the golden eyes as he allowed the sleep to claim him.

**The End**


	27. The ending credits

**THE ENDING CREDITS OF THE FADED MEMORIES**

**Chie:** Try to understand, it was my first Inuyasha-fic, therefore I feel a need to express my feelings to you. There's a people I want to thank and I suppose I just wanted to say goodbye to you all, that's who I am, an utterly emotional being. Wonder why I like Kagome so much...

Anyway, I should begin.

_The Dah_, you've been amazing and wonderful and absolutely irreplaceable. You were late fromyour theory lesson in driving school because I askedyou to beta the final chapter. Bad me.:Give her some credit people, now! She's more than a beta! She's also a very dear friend, HUGE Sesshoumaru fan (much bigger than I am) and extremely helpful and always has new ideas to share.

_MrsSmeagol, _my dear cousin, I don't even know if you made it this far. But you read at least some of this even you had not watched/read Inuyasha. Thank you. It meant a lot to me.

_Reetta, _asI already told you, the final chapter was for you. A lot of cute little kids, that's how it goes, neh? –smiles-

_ADSV, _thank you for sharing your story and inspiring me to write the miscarriage of Kagome's and Sesshoumaru's child. It was a heart-breaking twist which ended up being a lot better scene than I ever had hoped for. Also, your long reviews touched me every time. My deepest gratitude.

_hellspixie18 & mimi86 _for loyally reviewing from the early chapters to this day. Thank you.

_1Tierra _I want to thank you for bothering to type a review even though you were injured. It touched me and made me go all Awwww.

_The Squabbit, TsukiToraHime-chan, Busoshwe, Izumi-love, Kat57, Jaded Alone x, CelticMist, sesshyssexymistress, anime pixie, professionaldooropener, Ars Arcanum, robinsena369, empyrealfantasy, OtakuAnime131, Megumi-san, loveaswellashateforever, mangadreams, SaBrIeL ofthe MoOn, Akikazu, Akaikurai_

For making me feel loved. I'm sorry that the list is that short though. Nearly every review made me happy, I'm just lazy, sorry.

_Everyone who reviewed, be it or SingleSpark, Adultfanfiction or Fanfiction, _Thank you from the bottom of my heart for spending your time to making a thing that truly made me happy. Every time. Kiitos. ( is Finnish and means thank you)

_Everyone who ever voted in Singlespark and rated in Adultfanfiction or added on his/her favourite-list on Fanfiction_, thank you. Means a world to me. You're amazing.

_Everyone who read it all,_ thank you. My gratitude. I'm glad, if my first little fic has brought at least some entertainment to you.

And finally,

_Everyone who is reading this and crying because it's all over_, Take a tissue. –holds out the box- I'm honoured. Don't cry, I don't deserve your tears.

You have been a great audience, each and every one of you. Writing Faded memories was a very special experience for me hence it was my first fic. I've grown and my writing has improved since the start Your receiving and positive encouragement have meant to me more than mere words can tell. I'm happy, honoured and a bit surprised. Looking at the stats, I feel like many people liked it and that makes me happy. FM is my little baby.

But alas, it's over now and there will be no more.

Remember though, that it'll be here forevermore and you can always return to it and read it again if you feel like it.

My work here is done. Until we meet again.

_With deepest gratitude and love,_

**_Chiera _**


End file.
